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Just a dream
Posted: 10/22/2008 12:23:02 AM | What a nice day,cruisin around the city in my shitty car.
I went to my street,the street where all the clubs,and all the goodies were.
I’m walking in my girls store. She’s on the phone as usual.
Didnt even notice me,im grabing a chocolatte from her table.
Looking at her at made me feel good about being this jerkoff.
She turns around makes a silly face,i smile too,giving me the sign that she will be done in a sec.
I’m still looking at her,hard to believe that someone that good is making my life better,
She, the last princess left in the world,the best piece of art god ever has drawn,
Mother of all beauty,lips of an angel and nice big eyes that glow.
Sweeter thn my favourite candy,funnyer than the best comedians,yet serious when i need to be,serious
Like a doctor that plays with human hearts.
She’s of the phone,i give her the biggest hug,a long,wet,kiss.
I missed her.
We talk about things,i cant say about what,cause it was allways everything ,we’re one of those people that have no limits when talking.
She got horny and started touching me.
One thing led to anther and we’re in her office trying out her new furniture.
I always felt like im the luckyest man on the world when ****ing her.
I had that thing on my mind every time tho.
The thing that bothered me through the life.
“Im not good enough” thing.
And i couldnt get rid of it.
We we’re loud,you could hear people knocking on her shop doors asking if we’re allright.
Dumb ****s,we’re just having fun.
She finished in a scea(thats the feeling you wanna feel,when you make a girl enjoy herself as much as you enjoy) i got of her and sucked it until i came.
I had to go to work soon , we kissed for a few more minutes,she wouldnt let me go,
But i had to go,and she understands,im getting out of the shop,got in the car,turned on the cd she made for me few days ago.
Came to my workplace,yes i was a bouncer in the club,the smallest and the meanest one.
Me and my girl used to go out alot,clubbin mostly,heavy drinkin and partyin.
People knew who i was,and couldnt connect me when working and me when i was with her.
I was the best in looking mean when working and coming home making dinner for my boo.
I dont even know how i do it,im 2 really different persons in one.
But i am what i am.
Im finishing with work in 30 minutes,no t to much trouble tonight in there.
A few people kicked out for being to drunk n touching the wrong girls.
So i say goodbye to the guys and go out.
It was cold,nice and cold,i light up a cigarette and start walking to my car.
To get to it i had to go through one back alley,yeah,the bloody alley,cause we beat up bad boys there.
I had my headphones on,still listening to the same music i have in my car.
Our music!
I called my baby to tell her that ill be home in 15 minutes
Boom,i felt a train hit me in the head.
Im on the floor,i cant feel left side of my head.
Its pretty dark i cant see shit.
I menage to stand up grab one of them and start beating him as hard as i could.
I gues the guys that got of work with me and stayed talking in front of the club ran to the back stopped me from killing the guy.
They said i was bleeding,called an ambulance,i passed out.
BLACKOUT.
Im in the hospital i can see doctors around me but i couldnt hear them.
What the **** is this,am i dreaming,are these white faggots angels?
I ask myself while trying to get up and talk to someone.
I pass out again.
I get up they say a day latter.
I still cant hear shit, my head feels heavy.
Hurts like a **** too.
I talk to people but i cant hear them.
My baby is there crying,im talking to her shes looking at me crying not saying a thing.
A doctor passes me a piece of paper with 4 words on it.
“you’s deaf,im sorry”
I get up all pissed start pulling shit outta myself and breaking shit.
They give me a shot to calm me down.
She was there the whole time,every day,every night.
She was the only one i had ,i had noone else.
Then one day,she didnt come.
And the doctors said that i can go home,that im ready to move on.
I get out,sit in my car,cant hear his shitty sound anymore.
Radio in the car is on,still playing our favourite songs,songs that i just have in my memory now.
I still couldnt figure out why my baby didnt come and pick me up.
I get to our apartment,unlock the doors,shes not there.
Wierd shit,i leave to go see if shes at work.
I get there,and holly shit,the people insida say they bought it last week.
Im going home,still trying to figure out what the **** is happening.
Didnt sleep that night.
I was drinking the holly watter(vodka).
She didnt come.
I lived on vodka and food that my neighbour brought me every day.
Didnt get out at all.
I was fired from the club.
Who need a deaf bouncer.
Spent the last month alone.
I decided to move out,i got a small apartment at the end of the city.
Threw my phone away,sold my car.
Didnt care to much about myself.
Still couldnt hear shit.
Doctors said that my hearing is not coming back.
So i gave up on visiting them.
I lived a quiet life,walked alot and drank even more.
I didnt have,there,easyer to explain.
I lost everything,
My baby is who knows where,doing who knows what,she was the last person who would leave me,
But i had to open my eyes and see that shes gone.
I couldnt touch her soft hair anymore,kiss her sweet lips,look into her beautiful eyes,
Hear her sexy voice,fall asleep with her while watching our favourite show,feed her cry with her when she gets mad at me for being an idiot.
Its ****ed up,its sad,frustrating and hard to believe.
I dont have my job.
Friends gave up on my because i was not the same person anymore.
I went from 2 persons to one,a really depressed one!
So one day im thinking bout all that ,drinking on the top of my bulding.
Why should i live if my problems are unsolvable.
**** it,dropped the bottle,climbed the edge of the building.
Still thinking,i lost the one and only important thing in my life.
I jumped.
It felt like slow motion,and halfway down i could hear,or maybe it was just my mind messing with me,
the song we liked alot,but it was her voice singing it.
I smiled and started singing with her...
there could be a few mistakes,but english is my second language and im still learning  | | | |
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