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Thread: Narcissitic Personality Disorder or Psychopath

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 37 (view)

Narcissitic Personality Disorder or Psychopath Posted: 10/11/2009 9:29:32 AM
OP you've got some good advice from people who have lived through a relationship with an abuser. I highly recommend you read the book "Why does he do that" by Lundy Bancroft, it's a real eye opener. Even IF this man has a mental illness of some kind, it does NOT excuse him abusing you, in anyway, shape or form. What you are feeling is traumatic bonding (which is also covered in that book), it's also known as stockholm syndrome. Read up on it, I'm sure it will ring bells for you. Have NO contact with him, it's really the only way to go. Any contact whatsover is encouraging to these type of people. The best way to deal with it is with silence. Keep strong, and don't blame yourself. ((((hugs))))

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 164 (view)

The Final Curtain for Jacko!!!!! Posted: 7/7/2009 2:22:50 PM
Maybe the poor man can finally have some peace. My personal belief is that he was a rather tortured soul who loved and cared deeply. He was exceptionally talented and did a lot of wonderful charitable work over the duration over his life. I truly hope he's at peace. RIP Michael, thanks for music and the memories

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 23 (view)

girl returns out of the blue , is this for real ? Posted: 4/10/2009 6:36:53 AM
OP stop ruminating about the if's, but's and why's and just say hello to her already! You will soon know if she wants to chat or see you or not. Seeing her online and thinking about it all the time is going to do your head in

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 511 (view)

When dating a man who has a child, will I EVER come first? Posted: 3/30/2009 5:29:29 AM
I don't agree that kids come first, or your significant other comes first. I do think though, that your happiness comes first. Imagine your kids are first but you're not happy. All the things you do for your kids, eventually your unhappiness and negativity will wash over them. Do you really think you're doing them a favor by making them first priority yet yourself is unhappy? I say seek your happiness and all of the good and positive things that is in you will wash over them. Imagine you're happy because you spend time with your significant other. You're not neglecting your kids, but you're not jumping at their whim either. The kids will actually benefit from you being truly happy. And so will you! This post is the most sensible one by far!! My partner has a son, and his son adores me (luckily!), we spend time together, the 3 of us, but I also get alone time with my partner. His son respects our relationship and loves seeing his Dad happy. His sons needs are not neglected, far from it actually, it all balances well. I did however date a man who had an 11yo daughter who he allowed to dictate his life, including mine when I was there. Was a nightmare! She got to chose what we ate, what we watched on TV, films we saw etc and so on .... ridiculous. She was horribly spoilt, indulged and precocious, suffice to say, the relationship didn't last. Relationships with a single parent can work but it depends on the single parent!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 510 (view)

When dating a man who has a child, will I EVER come first? Posted: 3/30/2009 5:28:27 AM
I don't agree that kids come first, or your significant other comes first. I do think though, that your happiness comes first. Imagine your kids are first but you're not happy. All the things you do for your kids, eventually your unhappiness and negativity will wash over them. Do you really think you're doing them a favor by making them first priority yet yourself is unhappy? I say seek your happiness and all of the good and positive things that is in you will wash over them. Imagine you're happy because you spend time with your significant other. You're not neglecting your kids, but you're not jumping at their whim either. The kids will actually benefit from you being truly happy. And so will you! This post is the most sensible one by far!! My partner has a son, and his son adores me (luckily!), we spend time together, the 3 of us, but I also get alone time with my partner. His son respects our relationship and loves seeing his Dad happy. His sons needs are not neglected, far from it actually, it all balances well. I did however date a man who had an 11yo daughter who he allowed to dictate his life, including mine when I was there. Was a nightmare! She got to chose what we ate, what we watched on TV, films we saw etc and so on .... ridiculous. She was horribly spoilt, indulged and precocious, suffice to say, the relationship didn't last. Relationships with a single parent can work but it depends on the single parent!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 4 (view)

Glandular Fever Posted: 3/19/2009 6:00:58 AM
I had Glandular Fever when I was 31, it's really horrible and debilitating. Yes rest is very important! I saw a Naturopath and he put me on massive amounts of Vitamin C as well as Magnesium and various others things, these really helped. So I would recommend talking to a Naturopath about it. But yes, rest rest rest, no alcohol, eat well, plenty of fluids.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 12 (view)

Is Mr. Single Father Compatible With Ms. No Child? Posted: 2/26/2009 5:35:17 PM
Well my SO has a son and our relationship is great. However, I had a previous relationship with a man who had an 11yo daughter and it was a disaster! He allowed his child to rule his life, which in turn ruled mine SHE decided what we did, what we ate, what movies we watched, everything really, it was ridiculous and she treated her father appallingly as well. My current SO balances it very well, his son doesn't lack love, affection or attention at all, but either do I. I'm not the third wheel like I was in the previous relationship. I love his son and his son loves me. I'm not his Mum and don't act like I am, I'm his friend. It works really well. His ex wife is a real nutbag and does try to cause trouble and my SO does get angry and frustrated by it, but he realises him getting himself worked up about it isn't going to change her (they've been divorced 10 years). I think any single parent that as a relationship with someone who doesn't have children, need to realise that statements like "my kids ALWAYS come first, no matter what" don't make them attractive prospects. Of course kids needs should come first, but it's healthy for kids to realise that "grown up time" is important also and that Mummy or Daddy are "entitled" to a life as well Oh, one more thing, it's very hard if your SO has a child/ren and you have all responsibility but no authority .... this can make things very tense.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 96 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria Posted: 2/26/2009 12:53:41 AM
A great rainfall would be wonderful, we SO badly need it! Maybe we all need to do a rain dance!!? Kmac and everyone, please stay safe tomorrow

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 26 (view)

just a thought Posted: 2/25/2009 7:39:22 PM
Good fun topic OP I personally think all men should have to endure one full on "aunt flow" in their life. The mood swings, the painful cramps where you have to lay in the foetal position with a heat pack on your tummy and your back, the back ache for days, the migraine, and all the other associated joys!! Sorry guys, but I cannot imagine many men would handle this well, hell most men think they're dying when they have a cold!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

ANOTHER FREE PARTY IN MELBOURNE FOR POF MEMBERS March 20th Posted: 2/23/2009 4:14:27 AM
SO good to see a successful Melbourne event and more to come! Congrats to the organisers and keep partying everyone

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 86 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria Posted: 2/23/2009 2:32:38 AM
Fires in the Dandenongs now, Belgrave, Lysterfield, Upwey so far. My partners friend who works for SES says this is far from over. It's windy and it keeps changing direction, causing havoc. This is truly a nightmare.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 66 (view)

Classic Aussie Songs Posted: 2/22/2009 7:45:03 PM
but I would also add the H&C song called something like "Kiss you in four places" Mr Freckle, that's "Throw your arms around me" by H&C .. grreat song!! Ok another one to add now "I am, you are, we are Australian"

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 82 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria Posted: 2/22/2009 6:41:25 PM
Well, its heating up again here in Vic, many fires are still burning, sadly the danger isn't over. Warburton is now under threat, another beautiful place, many residents have evacuated to Lilydale. My partner and I woke up this morning (bottom of the Dandenongs) to the strong smell of smoke and it was very very smoky outside, it's frightening. I urge anyone in the danger areas to get out early!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 78 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria Posted: 2/21/2009 5:09:03 AM
Cazzzz, I'm deeply sorry to hear of your brother-in-laws death, how terribly sad, my heart goes out to you and your family. That's awful what's happened to your son also, thank goodness he's physically ok.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 76 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria Posted: 2/21/2009 3:24:15 AM
Miss K, thank you so much for sharing your experience with the fires, thank god you're ok!! I hope the rest of your family and friends are ok as well. I know a family who barely got away with their lives but lost their house and their lifes work with it. Another family I know stayed and fought to save their house, once the hoses melted, they had to use buckets to throw at the flames licking at their porch, terrifying. They managed to save the house and go out alive, a miracle really. They lost everything else on their property though. I cannot imagine the heartbreak and loss so many people are experiencing, my heart aches for them. So many people have lost loved ones, pets, friends, property, it's just horrifying.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 67 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria Posted: 2/10/2009 3:40:07 AM
I feel so very blessed right now that my loved ones are safe and sound. My heart aches for those who have lost loved ones, those who are still waiting to hear if their loved ones survived, those who have lost their homes, their possessions, their pets, everything. I cannot imagine the hell these people are enduring right now. Anyone interested in helping by volunteering: http://www.govolunteer.com.au/volunteer/events.htm Also the RSPCA are appealing to people to donate pet food and towels and blankets. As we go to bed in our homes, in our comfy beds, spare a thought for those who have been affected in these fires.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 47 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria Posted: 2/8/2009 1:48:41 PM
Christine Nixon has just announced that bodies found in two of the worst hit area's (in terms of life lost) are being treated as murder victims on the basis that they investigating arson in those area's. Is the horror of this day ever going to cease? It is truly horrifying and the horror continues and increases. Officially 108 people dead. As for people deliberately lighting some of these fires, it is just beyond imagination, I hope they get the **stards who are doing this Unfortunately I'm not in the financial position to help much monetary wise but I'm going to donate as much clothes etc as I can. Was talking to a friend last night about the family we know who've lost their home, and we were saying if everyone just donated one thing, it would make a huge difference to these people who literally only have the clothes on their back. I just cannot imagine what all these people are going through who don't know if their loved ones are alive or not .... it's truly hell.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 38 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria Posted: 2/8/2009 1:50:59 AM
Over 60 people confirmed dead already from the fires in Vic, they're predicting it to rise to 100+ ... it's an absolute tragedy I know one family that lost their home and barely got out alive themselves. Another one, family friends that spent the night fighting to save their home, was no warning, they managed to save the house but lost everything else, other cottage on the property, barn with 5 cars all gone. Thank god they all still have their lives. This is a tragedy in massive proportions

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 17 (view)

What's your favorite Posted: 2/7/2009 1:30:33 AM
Favourite comfort food is definitely good ol' roast lamb mmmmmm .... with roast spuds, pumpkin, onion, carrot, peas ... more veggies the better, and homemade gravy and mint jelly .... yummmm

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 23 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria Posted: 2/6/2009 11:53:43 PM
Well Vic reached the highest temperatures ever recorded today! There are fires blazing everywhere, and they're saying it could be worse than Ash Wednesday ... scary stuff. A change has just swept through thank god, but the change in wind direction will cause havoc with the fires. The heat today was just phenomenal, I believe it got to nearly 47deg, revolting! I hope all fellow Vic's survived the heat today, and we may all actually get some sleep tonight!!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 9 (view)

Heat Wave - Victoria (Adelaide too) Posted: 1/31/2009 2:33:21 AM
Got to 45 in Melbourne yesterday, it's horrendous. Everyone is really feeling the effects of this heat wave, especially those who are ill and elderly. I feel SO sorry for anyone who doesn't have a/c. I've only got it in the lounge room and that's where we've been camping lol. I'd hate to think what the power bill we will be arggghhh. I remember heat waves like this in the 80's, when we used to stay at a caravan park down the beach over summer. We would sleep on camp beds outside the van, the heat was so stifling. Days and nights were spent on the beach, in the water as much as possible. I don't know whether it's global warming or not, but Melbourne often has really hot spells over summer, but a week or 2 over 40 degrees is hard to handle.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

The Lying Game Posted: 1/23/2009 4:52:33 PM
This is a situation I would definitely "lie". There's no way on gods green earth I wouldn't take action when anyone was threatening to end their life. I have in fact been in this situation and was able to save this girls life.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

Amazing dog and cat stories Posted: 1/23/2009 4:49:16 PM
Animals are SO intuitive, it constantly amazes me. When I'm sad or upset, when I cry in particular, my labrador will have to literally be on top of me and put her front legs around me like she's hugging me and lick my tears away! She's a little angel. My little fella, literally cries with me lol, amazing. My little fella is a jack russell x foxy and they're known for being "ratters" and will kill small animals. Well where I live, we have HEAPS of possums, and during breeding season, for some reason the Mummy possums drop their babies and my little fella gently picks them up and brings them in for me to look after, truly incredible!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

Getting set-up on blind dates Posted: 1/23/2009 4:39:12 PM
b64babe, I think your friends have really good intentions. Hell, when I was single, I wished someone would at least introduce me to their single male friends, mostly they didn't have any, my best mate said "oh my fiance only has one single friend, and he's single for a reason, wouldn't put you through that!!" lmao. But I digress, just tell them as much as you appreciate the sweet intentions, you'd rather choose your own dates.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 137 (view)

What's sexy?? Posted: 1/18/2009 7:05:27 PM
Sexy is waking up wrapped in my gorgeous mans arms and looking into his divine green eyes ahhhh ..... sexy is laughing together until your belly aches, sexy is watching my man work with his hands, sexy is when he comes up behind me a kisses me on the neck ... he's just got sexy rapt up

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 7 (view)

Weird weddings Posted: 1/17/2009 4:31:49 PM
Wedding of a very good friend, I was bridesmaid. She's a beautiful, classy girl and married the bogan of the decade hmmm .... anyway the wedding was expensive and elegant and all that stuff, the groom and his mates proceeded to get pissed as farts of course and were grinding each other on the dancefloor to the stripper song whilst the guests sat there with their mouths hanging open. Then comes the end of the reception, groom doesn't want to leave, want's to stay and drink more with his buddies, he has to be practically carried to the taxi taking him and the bride to their hotel for the night. As the taxi drives off he's hanging out the window yelling drunken dribble and throws a stubby out the window for good measure. Ahhhh soooo classy!!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 67 (view)

Long hair verses short hair Posted: 1/11/2009 9:46:46 PM
I love long hair on a man, if it suits him! My partner has long curly hair and it's soo sexy and really suits him. I've mostly had long hair, with a couple of short do's thrown in and I'm much happier with long hair, less fuss too!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

Looking for suggestions on how to be more romantic Posted: 1/11/2009 3:15:28 AM
^^^ that's adorable I find the simple, thoughtful things most romantic. My gorgeous partner and I were out in the garden one hot night, he was watering the garden and we were chatting and cuddling and looking at the moon. My darling picked a gorgeous flower and put it in my hair and told me how beautiful I am swoon .. another time on one of our anniversaries rather than buying a bunch of flowers, he went through his garden and picked all my favourite roses and arranged them in a beautiful bouquet for me, that meant SO much more to me than a store bought bunch, because of the thought put into it!! I still have a photo of that bouquet A few years ago with an ex of mine. I'd had a migraine and he'd put me to bed in a darkened room and I slept for a few hours. He woke me a few hours later and told me to close my eyes and lead me outside to where he'd set up a table for two for dinner, with fairy lights on and flowers and candles on the table and he served me dinner. That was soo romantic. Very sweet indeed.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 2 (view)

How to help a morbidly obese ex? Posted: 12/18/2008 8:58:16 PM
Well OP she really has to make a decision to change it herself. And as you say, there is not way you could or would say anything so it's a situation that's really out of your hands. Hopefully she will realise herself that it's very unhealthy and will shorten her life. Have your kids said anything to her? Perhaps hearing her kids say they're scared of losing their Mum will make a difference?

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Body Issues? Posted: 12/18/2008 8:54:27 PM
kywilli2063 ... shallow much??!! Yea it sucks that happened to you with the twins thing....but you went through with it, so if you want it fixed suck it up. Umm what would she suggest she had done?? Good lord, I hope if you ever have babies with a woman she doesn't end up with the same problem, will you leave her if she does??

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 17 (view)

Body Issues? Posted: 12/18/2008 8:49:24 PM
OP, my best friend has the same issue as you. She's a very slim girl and gave birth to 2 big bubs and it has left her tummy with lots of loose skin and she absolutely hates it! When she met her fiance, she did everything she could to cover it up, even when they were making love, he ended up asking her why and she told him and he said he loved ALL of her, and her tummy was from having 2 beautiful girls and is part of her, and therefore he loved it. So you see, not all men are super shallow at all, the good ones are out there, and remember we ALL have our flaws, I bet anything your ex didn't have a "perfect" body!! I'm carrying some extra weight due to a medical condition and get all paranoid about it, I was moaning about it the other day (as us women do!) and my partner said he didn't want to hear me say that as he loves my body, says it's womanly and sexy and very desirable (bless him!), so I really do think us women are our own worst critics and enemies when it comes to our bodies. Have you seen the movie Shirley Valentine, there's a scene where her lover kisses her stretch marks, it's sooo beautiful hehe, go watch it!!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 8 (view)

I'm guessing it's time to tell her how i feel? Posted: 12/16/2008 3:04:49 PM
I'm guessing it's time to tell her how i feel? Yes! She has done the right thing in taking things a little slowly as she'd just come out of a relationship and now she's falling in love with you If she told you 2 weeks ago she's falling in love with you, you better tell her how you feel soon, because you can be sure she's probably already thinking "hmm he mustn't feel the same way" ..... Good luck!!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

In the red corner, friends. In the blue corner, your partner. Posted: 12/12/2008 1:04:04 AM
Great question OP. I don't believe it's up to us to decide who our friends should and shouldn't be with. I do understand though it can be hard to see a dear friend with someone you don't think is good for them or doesn't treat them as well as you may want them to. A life long friend of mine married a man that pretty much everyone in her life didn't like (including her parents) and thought he wasn't good enough for her. I was bridesmaid at their wedding, yes it was a bit of an emotional conflict at the time but I did it for my dear friend. I just wanted her to be happy, and if this man made her happy, then who am I to stand in her way. This man used to regularly hit on me and make sleazy comments to several other friends, my friend even witnessed him once saying to me "I'd love to f### you!" and she just laughed it off. Yes, love is blind. 4 kids and 10 years later they're still together, although they did split for about 9 months. Even when they were apart, I didn't bag him or tell her she was a fool if she ever took him back because I knew there was a strong possibility they would get back together, and he was the father of 2 of her kids already. And yes they did get back together and have been together since. Good friends don't need to say anything...you can/should normally tell what they think of your partner by their mannerisms, conversation and body language etc. This is so true! This friend of mine knows I don't like her hubby very much, I've never had to actually say it. Heck, she's known me for 30 years, so I'm sure it's pretty obvious. However, I've never been outrightly rude to her husband, and I never will.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 21 (view)

Sarcasm...turn on or turn off?? Posted: 12/11/2008 10:15:51 PM
A wise friend of mine describes it as follows: What is Sarcasm in the hand of the bitter fool??? Hatred, a ticking bomb that will detonate in his own hand. What is Sarcasm in the hand of the wise? Art, that will get minds ticking.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

Sarcasm...turn on or turn off?? Posted: 12/11/2008 4:25:00 PM
Sarcasm...turn on or turn off?? A lot of people use sarcasm as way to be nasty and hostile and as a put down thinly veiled by so called humour ... "oh I was just being sarcastic" ...... and that's a BIG turn off Sarcasm is a form of speech or writing which is bitter or cutting, being intended to taunt its target wikipedia.org

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 2 (view)

Your last 24 hours Posted: 12/11/2008 4:13:12 PM
Good to see an interesting thread OP If I only had 24 hours to live hmmm well I wouldn't spend it on here lol. I would definitely spend some hours of that time making luurve with my soulmate and well call me predictable but I would want to spend it with my family and friends, probably a big party with lots of fabulous music, dancing, singing, eating, drinking, being totally hedonistic and surrounded by everyone I love and who loves me

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 25 (view)

How do you really feel about getting old? Posted: 12/9/2008 10:10:36 PM
I think Audrey Hepburn said it best # For attractive lips, Speak words of kindness. # For lovely eyes, Seek out the good in people. # For a slim figure, Share your food with the hungry. # For beautiful hair, Let a child run his or her fingers through it once a day. # For poise, Walk with the knowledge you'll never walk alone. # People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed and redeemed; Never throw out anybody. # Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm. # As you grow older you will discover that you have two hands; one for helping yourself, the other for helping others. # The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. # The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole, but true beauty in a Woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she knows. # And the beauty of a woman, with passing years only grows! Peace

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 23 (view)

celebrity encounters Posted: 12/9/2008 6:13:32 PM
The boy chooses this moment to break his harness, slip through the stroller and bolt right through the front door and into the arms of Madonna. She was pretty reluctant to give him back too!!!! Aww that's so cute! I'd forgotten I also saw Madonna in NYC, jogging in Central Park with her Personal Trainer/Bodyguard. My friend and I both did a double take, looked at each other went "was that!??" ... and yep it was lol. Also saw Claudia Schiffer and her boyfriend at the time that magician bloke David someone, Copperfield??? On the same trip to the USA saw Bill & Hilary Clinton (in the 90's this was when he was President) and they waved to us lol. Met Jeff Kennett too, does he count as a celebrity He picked my brother and his mate up when they were hitch hiking home after a long boozy night once lol, great bloke actually.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 17 (view)

How do you really feel about getting old? Posted: 12/9/2008 5:07:54 PM
And lastly what are your 'Anti-ageing secrets'? Happiness and love!! Smiling, laughing, being surrounded by wonderful, caring, sweet, funny and loving people. My grandmother is the perfect example of growing old gracefully. She's 94 and has the skin of a much younger woman. The only thing she used to do was put egg whites on her skin (kind of like a mask), I used to giggle when she did that but hey maybe it helped. Maybe people should try that rather than injecting poison into themselves?? Both my parents look amazing for their age, and neither of them have had any "work" done, their beautiful souls shine through on their faces and light up their eyes. I truly don't understand why people are so worried about laugh lines, frown lines etc etc, these are the signs that we've lived life! From what I've seen, the people (women particularly) that are running around getting botox injections, nips and tucks etc are the same women who are "muttons dressed as lamb" .... desperately clinging to their youth, when in fact what they're doing makes them look old and sad. Embrace who you are and what you look like, go and rent the movie Shirley Valentine!!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 4 (view)

Undestanding Emails with married people Posted: 12/8/2008 4:24:33 PM
With all the intricate niches on the net,I'm sure there's a more appropriate place for lonely marrieds to seek like minded people other than a site geared mostly towards singles. Totally agree! Why do married people chose a dating site to chat to people? Wonder if their husbands/wives know they're on a dating site? Doesn't make sense to me at all, with all the forums, sites etc there is on the net these days, surely there's more appropriate places to chat.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 10 (view)

celebrity encounters Posted: 12/8/2008 4:50:03 AM
Used to work in a 5* hotel where lots of bands, actors and general celebs stayed. Met Sir Bob Geldof, M People, Nick Cave, Julian Clary, Courtney Love, Pantera, Rick Astley (ultimate 80's pop star lol), various boy bands, Johnny Diesel & family, all the channel 9 celebs from the 90's, gawd lots more, was an interesting time

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

bikie gangs in aust Posted: 11/27/2008 5:22:18 PM
Good post OP. Interesting people are voting to delete it stating it's a "redundant subject" ... I cannot find any other threads on this in the Australian forums?? It's very possible these gangs use a website like POF to consort, and many other websites. Unfortunately a lot of mediums are used to further organised crime. I would imagine that the police, CIA, FBI etc keep an eye on lots of these sites, they know a lot more than these criminals realise.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

THE “OTHER MAN/WOMAN”, Why do they go there ? Posted: 11/24/2008 7:42:05 PM
Im also wondering this. Is this a chick thing ?, would a man put up with the situation of being the "other guy "...and having to share ? or is mainly a female domain ? Hmmm I wonder the same pookie. I've been racking my brains trying to think of a male I know who's in or been in this situation. The only one I can think of is a gay friend who had an affair with a man who was in a relationship, and the other guy has now ended his relationship and my friend and him are now together. Will it last? Who knows? I would always be wondering if he will do the same thing again. Generally though, I think it's more often women in these situations because I don't think men would be able to accept sharing someone, knowing that their lover is also having sex with their husband. This is another thing I find bizarre, you often hear people who are having affairs with someone married say "oh but he's not having sex with his wife, he's told me they haven't had sex for a year" or something like that. How naive can you be? Who hasn't heard the story of the wife suddenly being pregnant and the mistress being shocked and hurt because her lover said he wasn't intimate with his wife anymore.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 9 (view)

THE “OTHER MAN/WOMAN”, Why do they go there ? Posted: 11/24/2008 6:42:31 AM
Great post So I ask our posters, what do you think motivates the “other person ? lack of self esteem ? a desire to hang onto the past ?, scared to move on ?, grateful for any small crumbs that drop their way ? or is it alternatively a power kick that another person lusts after them ? OP I think it could be all or any of the above reasons. I agree that with what you've said about your friend, she perhaps has a low self esteem, and because this man married the other woman and not her, she is getting a bit of a power kick going behind the wife's back (hmm does that make sense? it's late lol) Anyway, I truly don't understand why people accept being second best, because I believe that's what you're doing when you're the other man/woman. I've heard some people prefer it because they believe they get all the "good bits" of the person they're having the affair with, they don't have to deal with the day to day stuff like bills, kids, cooking etc etc, they just enjoy the sex and secret weekends away, dinners out and presents etc. However, then you see them miserable at times like Christmas or New Years when they're all alone while their lover is with their husband/wife and family. Do the gifts and memories of the quickies at lunch time sustain them at this time? Don't think so.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 52 (view)

Champagne taste on a beer budget! Posted: 11/19/2008 6:51:21 PM
Mmmmm............yes like my friend that used to have about 8 different cards. Myer blacklisted her because she couldn't pay their card off.............Let's see she had 1) Myercard 2) American Express 3) Mastercard 4) Visa 5) Diner's Club 6) David Jones card and there were others but I can't recall them This is exactly what I'm talking about Spicy. I see so much of this. Max out one card and move onto the next and so on and then it gets to the stage where someone has 10's of thousands of dollars owing on credit cards alone! Scary stuff.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 10 (view)

The Three Day Rule? Posted: 11/16/2008 6:46:33 PM
Girls really are quite simple. If we decide your hot, we start wondering whether we can trust your word, whether we would still be laughing with you in a few months time, and whether you're any good in bed. Nothing too complicated about that really. The only way to find the answers to those questions, is through more contact, and if there's no contact, then we stop wondering. Simple really. Well said bionic! You have to keep the momentum up guys or women will assume you've lost interest and as bionic says will "stop wondering".

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

The Three Day Rule? Posted: 11/16/2008 5:21:28 AM
Yep heard this one before, but then I'm a woman My friends and I often talk about how men seem to be on a totally different time line than women eg. if a man waits 4 days to call you it feels like forever and the woman has convinced herself that the man is not interested in her whereas the man is biding his time, doesn't want to look "too keen" and 4 days feels like nothing at all. There is a book called "The Rules" for women. Some women do follow the "rules" in this book, and there's plenty. Such as, a woman should always end the phone conversation, she should say she's busy if the man asks her out with less than 3 days notice (or something like that lol) and on and on it goes. I guess the moral of the story is don't take to long to reply, keep up the correspondence, and don't let things go cold. Yep, totally agree with this and of course it works both ways.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 60 (view)

Love Letters Posted: 11/16/2008 12:32:51 AM
Times are tough, money's hard. Here's your frikkin' Valentine's card Oh yeah, put some more beers in the fridge for satdy will ya darl, me mates & me will drop in on the way back from fishing. Might leave you a fish if the beer's cold. Happy Valentines. Be still my beating heart, just when I thought romance was dead!!

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 28 (view)

Do we attract people who dress like 10 pounds of sausages in a 5 pound bag? Posted: 11/15/2008 10:58:40 PM
It's a shame more women don't watch that show "What Not To Wear". Wouldn't it be nice to just be able to tell somone, "You need some colour in your hair, those shoes are foul and your makeup makes you look like a clown lol I think more men should watch Queer Eye for the Straight Guy for tips on how to dress etc.

chemistryiseverything

Joined: 6/5/2008

Msg: 54 (view)

Who Are Your Heroes, and Why? Posted: 11/15/2008 6:07:56 AM
My dad is my hero without a doubt. He's the most wonderful, caring, smart, beautiful man, I'm so blessed to have a Dad like him. Messages this short may not be posted Messages this short may not be posted

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