Do divorced women have to settle for any man that will take them? chat & forums.

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Thread: Do divorced women have to settle for any man that will take them?

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 121 (view)

Do divorced women have to settle for any man that will take them? Posted: 1/17/2008 7:04:00 PM
No person should ever settle for someone. Life is way to short not to find a true love. I see people every day in my work who choice to settle and not just in relationship but in their jobs and choices. We are in control of our own destiny...does that mean we are going to find a prince charming probably not but we should determine for ourselves things we can accept and things we can't and not rob ourselves of these desire and values out of the fear of being alone. When one loves themselves they tend to open the mind to the right person.....find that love and belief that you desire to be happy and in love and you will find people are attracted to you more. Be good to yourself......

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 34 (view)

Depression and spirituality Posted: 12/25/2007 4:24:51 PM
I wish that i could say i totally agree with you but as a psychiatric nurse i have the belief that this is only a partly true, depression is more than just an emotional mindset. It is the combination of spiritual, physical, chemical and emotional imbalances that affect one in five canadians. Many of these individuals benefit from support of family, church and therapists. I agree and encourage spiritual growth when working with a client.

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 38 (view)

Do you enjoy DANCING for a 1st Date? Posted: 12/25/2007 4:18:11 PM
I think dancing at anytime is RIGHT. I love to dance and have always believed the only "bad" dancer is the one who is too afraid to get up on the floor and show their moves. Dance is a great way to just have fun.....show your moves....and let loose...so first, second, third date.........and onward.

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 182 (view)

Is sex the motivation for mature adults to seek a relationship? Posted: 12/25/2007 4:13:18 PM
I think that sex is big part of the motivation that attracts us to seeking out relationships . I believe no matter whether you are 20 or 70 people have a need to feel desired or special both physically and emotionally. When i have responded to many of the conversations i have had on POF the first few dialogues have often been sexual but as time goes on the sexual motivation decreases but the desire for someone to feel that you find them interesting, (attractive), (desirable), (worthy), often increases. I think the sex may motivate us but the underlying need to have someone care will be what keeps the relationship going. Merry Christmas and Happy New year.

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 135 (view)

Is that all women want is sex? Posted: 1/31/2007 8:46:50 PM
The just say "no" phase comes into effect for men as well as women. You do not have to have sex and if you make your intentions clear and they push the limits it does not make you a wimp to say "no".

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

Bi Polar, how do I tell him? Posted: 1/31/2007 8:44:14 PM
Hi I am a psychiatric nurse and this is a question many of my clients ask me. How do i tell someone I love that i have Bipolar or Manic illness. The answer is never easy but honesty is usually the best way to go. With medications and understanding of the illness many people live a very normal and productive life. Bipolar is often related to people have Diabetes. Yes you could have to take medications all of your life and monitor yourself in maintaining sleep but it does not mean you are any less likely to be happy. anne

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 1003 (view)

FAQ - Instant Messenger Help. Posted: 10/5/2006 8:25:43 PM
How do i change my password i believe someone is reading my messages anne

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 7 (view)

Rationale for Love you enough to let you go Posted: 8/23/2006 10:27:14 PM
"I love you enough to let you go"....I actually think I understand that maybe it is the female in me or maybe the therapist. It is kind of like when a child wants to leave home...you love them may even want them to stay and protect them forever but you eventually have to let them go. Some relationship especially long distance once may bring people to a point where they love the person but know that if this continues that most likely all it would do is bring pain to each other. The lack of physical contact and everyday connections wears on many relationships. She may have started to wonder away from the relationship just out of lack of being together but don't sell yourself short it sounds like from the tears and pain that she did love you. Love is like a good mystery book.....it has many chapters......a collections of events and sometimes a really unexpected ending.

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 7 (view)

Phone Conversations Posted: 8/23/2006 10:18:24 PM
I am thinking it depends on a lot of things including answers and questions already asked How often does he not call? Does he work different times than you? The other thing to consider is if it is his first child he may have a lot of his own fears of becoming a parent and not even know what to say or questions to ask. There are some really good pre-natal books for men and women out there maybe this could be a start for him Good luck with the pregnancy..........it is truly a gift and I am sure he will come to realize that as well

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 71 (view)

rape thread restarted Posted: 8/23/2006 10:11:28 PM
Yes I think that it is important to share that with someone you choice to have a relationship with. Rape often has scars that are hidden deep inside us until we start to find ourselves feeling vulnerable. Relationships as they grow make us vulnerable to trusting another and new experiences,,,,honesty helps to build and secure good relationships.

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 356 (view)

Why are men threatened by an Independent, educated woman??? Posted: 8/10/2006 11:38:25 PM
I just had to say that i really liked your story it was moving and shows another part that we miss out on in our lives and you are right it is the "wisdom of those that have already travelled the road". I was blessed with knowing both sets of my grandparents as well as both my great-grandmothers and the gift of knowledge they gave me is PRICELESS....TY for your story anne

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 355 (view)

Why are men threatened by an Independent, educated woman??? Posted: 8/10/2006 11:32:55 PM
I can't say as i have found many men here threatened by women who are independant and educated. In fact most of the men i have talked to prefer not to be caregivers to someone. I think that mutual respect is the most important quality to have between people and that brings comes from understanding each other boundaries and strengths. a

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 157 (view)

Child support and single mothers Posted: 7/25/2006 10:45:52 PM
I am a single mother....and trust me not all women are looking for a hand-out. There are however women and MEN who take advantage but it is not fair to put the blame on all of us. anne

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 156 (view)

Child support and single mothers Posted: 7/25/2006 10:43:50 PM
Actually yes you can be held financially responsible but only if you have chosen to take on the role of father. There have been many successful court cases that uphold the man as a support and will deem that he must pay child support. However that can go both ways since there are numerous single father's now raising their children as well. It is a hard call whether it is right or wrong...does it depend on how long he/she has raised the child....the system has good and bad points anne

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 37 (view)

Name one thing.... Posted: 7/25/2006 10:37:41 PM
That is easiest question i have answered here the one good thing-was my daughter samantha.

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 87 (view)

Girlfriend uses threat of ending relationship to get her way Posted: 7/25/2006 10:36:17 PM
She may be threatening you because of her own insecurites. Testing the water to make sure she gets to be the dumpee rather than the dumper. This sometimes happens when a person has been hurt a few times. Or she can be just a control freak........if this has started so early in the relationship it is not a good sign. Talk to her about when your not in the middle of a discussion......sit down and tell her how it feels to you. See what she does.

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

Wow.. talk about rude. Posted: 7/25/2006 10:19:44 PM
I can see how you see that as rude and it is somewhat but i think there are people on here looking for specific things and sometimes they do not want to stray from that and don't even give a person a chance. Not necessary right but at least you don't lead or get lead on by someone..... anne

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 476 (view)

Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met? Posted: 6/26/2006 8:03:37 PM
I think that you can fall in love with someone without ever meeting them. I think that love is not cemented by the physical touch but by the emotional connection. I can sense another 's touch by the words he shares with me......"I will kiss you till the warmth of my lips takes leave and the transfer to yours is complete. I will feel the softness gain warmth and the sweet wetness of your lips tingle my very soul." Only words but if i close my eyes can i sense that feeling the answer for me is YES. Can a blind man find a woman beautiful without ever actually seeing her......of course the answer is yes.....we have five senses none more powerful than the other....each can be present or absent but does not make the reality of the emotion love less. a

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 86 (view)

Online Dating Guide for Men: Part Deux Posted: 5/20/2006 12:40:57 AM
Dave it is almost 4am on a night shift....and wow i love reading your stuff. You never ever cease to amaze me. Damn you are good and so now i know you can sing and write. I hope you are well....and having a good weekend. anne

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 40 (view)

What will it take to win custody? Posted: 4/30/2006 5:09:37 AM
Hi there. I work as a therapist often with people who are overwhelmed with much the same events as you have mentioned. Your wife obviously has addiction as well as other issues. Her behaviour would be indictive of someone who was likely abused in her early life. Be very aware that courts in many situations no longer see the female as the only potential parent. I find if you don't go at this as an attack on your ex and really stay focused in the courts as the positive for your daughter. I am assuming that your daughter is 8 or under because of the time frame you gave for being together. Courts usually allow children to start making their own decisions about age 11-12 but sometimes will talk to the child when they are younger. If there is no push for the court....wait it out the longer you can maintain your present care situation the better. The courts see time as evidence of committment. Good luck and remember you have not lost yet... anne

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 32 (view)

I have a question for all the single parents!!! Posted: 3/16/2006 2:58:35 PM
Hi well i can say this for myself. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I have seen some pretty "ugly" beautiful people in this world and some beautiful not so attractive people. i believe that it is how people treat not only you as a person but how they treat people in the world around them including themselves. As a single mother i have met someone who is the nicest looking man in the world and how do i know because without ever seeing him he makes me feel like i know that. He is sweet and kind and has a huge heart that melts me. He asks not only about me but also about my daughter.....he can be cranky when he does not feel well but never at me....I am blessed to say that beauty is what you feel in your heart. a

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 268 (view)

Have you ever paid to use a dating site? Posted: 2/20/2006 6:15:05 AM
Yes, I have paid for sites but love POF. Many of the sites I was on were more costly to men than women which does not seem fair and also.....like others have posted I am not so sure that they were honest or run very well. Thank you POF for everything except that you re-calculate the age and increase it with your birthday.....smile kidding of course....

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

why are women afraid or intimidated by guys with kids Posted: 2/20/2006 6:06:56 AM
I am a single mother who hid out for almost 3 years after i separated from my husband. I did not want to be single again but I also did not want to be with him. I loved being a wife and switched all that energy into being a mother. Then one day i realized I was missing out on a life. I went on a site that a friend suggested.....and started meeting people from all over the world. I realized you just have to jump back in of course a little wiser than before. I can tell you it is not always a easy journey but it is better than sitting alone all the time....and having intimate moments that are only solo. Good luck get back in the game....and don't be afraid to play and have fun. anne

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 578 (view)

Sudbury Bash!!! Posted: 12/9/2005 11:52:45 AM
Time to party remember reindeer service home.......would not want to lose one of the POF people.......

silentwhisper2u

Joined: 9/3/2005

Msg: 119 (view)

SAT. OCT. 15th, Fearfest at Canada's Wonderland!! Posted: 9/26/2005 12:42:29 PM
i hope you have the shift off I am in the same boat trying to get the day offff

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