So many people blame "marriage" for their misfortune in love. It is not the marriage, it is the people who couldn't keep their promises to each other.

Actually, marriage has nothing to do with "being able to provide for myself" or to being "financially independent"....unless you want that as your platform. Then you have to deal with accounting all of the time in your relationship/marriage and there is no unconditional love in your marriage. It has all sorts of conditions. Then, I have to ask you...are you really in love?

Marriage is the exchange of vows that a man and a woman make to promise each other that they will love, honor, cherish each other in sickness and in health. To be exclusive only to each other sexually....and anything else they want to put in there.
You can write whatever vows that you want.

And au contraire, I know older women whose goal in life is to find a man who will marry them--I am friends with a few. They are still brainwashed into thinking that they are not complete without a husband. Sometimes, age does not lend wisdom. However, I do think that they will, and are, becoming fewer.

And yes the fact that he was selfish played into it, and hardly worked was another. i kissed his ass and he took it forgranted. it got old running to get him things when he didnt return the favor. I know its part my fault for spoiling him I have tried to talk to him before but everytime things just went back to normal.

Does that prove i am not capable of a relationship?

Just wondering if relationships, online dating, POF, or just trying to date in general has made you bitter about life

So the question is, in a relationship, what does the lady do in return for been shown a lot of "chivalry"? Is it just a thank you?

In these days of non-gender specific roles, I am finding it hard to point to anything.

Yeah me too! Innocent people DO NOT settle out of court especially to the tune of 22 million dollars. There's no doubt that he was talented but he ruined his career and reputation with his crazy behaviour. If he really was guilty it just proves that rich people can get away with anything, money truly is the root of all evil (along with politics and religion but thats another issue

although death is a good second prize for us who do realize the truth.

Look at him. His entire family is messed up and he did his house up to attract children and he was the only grown up aloud in.

He didn't write any of his music on his own, and whoever was helping must have stopped about 15 years ago because he has done nothing since.

I'd like to share my 2 cents. This is my opinion. It seems that,in our society,the more success a person acheives,the more they are brought down by slander and unfounded rumors. Being a society that seems to thrive on scandle,too many people jump on the bandwagon as if it were a witch hunt.

Please tell me we aren't comparing MJ to Jesus now!

La Gioconda, you're an elegant writer but you don't really think you know a musican's inner self from his lyrics do you?

So you are saying that I'm dull?? You should explain yourself, because from what I've read, you haven't really offered her any type of suggestions., or "advice" either.

For example, one could have a 'good' life, in terms of good paying job, nice place to live and money in the bank and still feel all those things - 'restless, boredom, loneliness', if one is missing higher purpose of living.

Do you have hobbies?
Any chores or physical activity you are interested in doing?
Any friends or family you can contact?

Marriage is the ceremony of the vows of committment. Our lives are all full of ceremonies in various degrees. Funny that people put more into the ceremony of "Divorce Parties" than the actual important ceremony in the first place.

Problem is they want to live together before marriage. You don't, knowing that living together is a sure fire way to wreck even the best relationship. What do you?

In just two plus weeks on POF I've learned that some of the gentlemen I speak too actually believe that I can make them happy...

She's actually 7 yrs older than me, I thought after the BS of the past that dating an older woman , would be less head games. We talk and go out and stuff and have a really good time. Sometimes I feel bad because I feel like I have these walls built, and that in a sense I have a sense of fear of repeating the past.

I have a very hard time remembering being loved. How do you get around that?

I think I was doing all the loving and there was no real love in return

When you are young...you dont know...its the physical and the intimacy right off the bat....you dont know what is ahead...so young ones fall in love quickly and are eager to share their hearts...

The second reason is my experience has been the complete opposite. My partner and I dealt with differences which included native language, religion, culture, political views, education, income and a nine year age difference and this week marks 13 years together. (In case some folks get the wrong idea my partner is highly educated and although she is the younger it's not a "sugar daddy" relationship.)

As for "seeking the 20 year relationship" it's about wanting to find someone who feels the passion and emotion and not wanting to build a relationship based on friendship and having a hang around buddy.

The second reason is my experience has been the complete opposite. My partner and I dealt with differences which included native language, religion, culture, political views, education, income and a nine year age difference and this week marks 13 years together. (In case some folks get the wrong idea my partner is highly educated and although she is the younger it's not a "sugar daddy" relationship.)

I've asked her out for a walk a few times but so far she's had other things to do...