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Thread: What kind of man would do this?

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 24 (view)

What kind of man would do this? Posted: 8/12/2009 12:07:43 AM
curlygrl nailed it i think. Also women do this too its not gender specific. Sorry you were hurt, dont let this sour your good heart and loving character. Just be a little more careful.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

guy's truth Posted: 8/11/2009 8:26:50 PM
He wants to keep you around for the possibility you will sleep with him. After you do, he will push you away again. Your not going to win with this guy other than walking away with your dignity in tact. Thats my opinion.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 88 (view)

Robbed by Another Fish from this Pond! Posted: 8/11/2009 9:04:23 AM
Plenty of Sharks! Sucks what happened to you. I liked Ameerra's post best.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

I just need someones opinion other than my friends..? Posted: 8/11/2009 8:52:28 AM
If he is under 24 and in college, i can agree he isnt yet grown into a man. He's still in his partying phase. If this is the case, he is probably embarassed that you saw him in the condition he was in. More than likely his friends had something to do with his drunkeness at the time. Guard your heart and be carefull. If he's turning to alchohall for his problems, thats pretty much going to be the path his life travels anytime a 'problem' arises.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

should I have patience? Posted: 8/11/2009 8:38:56 AM
If a man is interested, he will pursue you Thats true, unless he thinks you shot him down and/or ignored him. Then why should he waste time?

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

Need a guys opinion Posted: 8/11/2009 8:35:06 AM
Am I wasting my time It depends on how long you have been seeing him. I can understand for the first few dates not wanting to bring someone back to your place. But eventualy, yeah you should be invited. No matter where i lived i would invite my GF over. So if he keeps refusing to be his guest, my guess is your being played for sex. Hope your not too serious about him.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

sick of the mind games... Posted: 8/11/2009 8:23:34 AM
What do I do? Ignore the guy and forget about him? Yes, all other options will eventualy lead you to heartach.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 670 (view)

Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married? Posted: 8/11/2009 8:12:11 AM
Nice another old post from 06 from someone who isnt even on the board anymore.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 78 (view)

Can poisonous people change? Posted: 8/11/2009 8:07:50 AM
No these people NEVER change. The only people that are going to tell you that they do are the poisonous people who hate having thier cover blown. Dont be fooled. Much like Rude people, cheaters and liars. They never change.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

Did you keep your wedding photos? Posted: 7/30/2009 7:19:46 AM
I had actualy kept every (sweet) note and letter, card, picture given to me by my EX. However when we split for good all of it went to the trash. I have no children unfortunatly. So no one but myself would ever want to look at them and i dont forsee myself wanting to.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 218 (view)

Are tall men more likely to cheat? Posted: 7/29/2009 2:46:56 PM
yes all tall guys will cheat. So ladies if you want a man who doesnt cheat, date us shorter guys. Not only will we never cheat on you but its a fact that we have HUGE packages! Now you know where our growth spurt went!

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 22 (view)

My girl got pregnant, she dumped me? is this normal? need some advices..thanks Posted: 7/29/2009 2:35:24 PM
Damn guy i feel for ya. I'd be excited as hell if i was in a relationship and was about to be a father. No this is not a normal thing for her to do. As much as i hate to look at the negative side of things, in this case i dont see as you have much of a choice if you want to keep your life on track. Your going to have to get over her and abide by her wishes. Leave her alone. Its realy stupid this ignorant childish game she is playing with you. Its too bad she cant be adult about it and tell you whats up. Normaly when i hear about stuff like this, its because someone else has stuck thier nose in her bussiness and is telling her what to do. Too bad she cant think for herself. If it is your child, i feel bad for you that she is locking you out. But i wouldnt do anything for her till lines of communication are reopened and she tells you what this is all about. It may not be yours, she may have chosen to not have it, or give it up for adoption or even used you to just get pregnant. There are so many different possibilities. Keep your head on strait and dont act up, stay within the law and keep your life on track. Thats the best advice i can give you.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 5 (view)

Overlook this as a guy thing or deeper character flaw? Posted: 7/29/2009 2:21:22 PM
In my opinion i believe this is just the type of person he is. I do not think he is intentionaly withholding gifts from her. However if she requires gifts (even little personal ones, im not talking gold digger here) to reaffirm his love for her, she may need to ask herself if this relationship is going to work out. I dont forsee him changing. You might want to suggest she pick up the book by Gary Chapman called The Five Love Languages and have her read it, then him. He may be expressing his feelings for her in a different way that she may not realise. Its a great book for couples imo.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

men using any excuse when they start to like you Posted: 7/28/2009 10:15:22 AM
Its just a guess on my part, but i could see where a guy was hoping to spend all his time with just you. He may have wanted a life with just you and him and not all the other randomness that seems to have popped up. After getting to know you, he now realises there is alot more happening in your life. Perhaps he feels he will always take a back seat to everything else. Im not saying this is bad or good, just something he would rather choose to not happen.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 43 (view)

I don't know what to do,please help! Posted: 7/26/2009 11:55:23 AM
So how did you both figure out you were "with" the same guy?

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 5 (view)

Think i can see what he is doing...but y??? Posted: 7/26/2009 11:40:55 AM
It could be some form of Pseudologia fantastica. Him telling you things he thinks you would value even if they are untrue. Later he either has a brief bout with concience, guilt or learns you didnt make a big deal of his "thing he lied about" and refutes his story. Why? who knows. Either way, this is the road you will be always on if you continue to walk the path with him. Choose whats right for you.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 4 (view)

This seems to have crept up on me Posted: 7/26/2009 11:22:06 AM
exactly what was said above. Dont let this go on without telling him. The longer you wait the harder it will be on him. None of this is your fault as long as you dont let it go on further. You now kind of have a good idea his intentions are not for friends only. So now its your responsibility to let him know how you feel. Dont wait and use tact and compassion if possible.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 2 (view)

Why Dont Guys Like Curvy Women? Posted: 7/26/2009 11:10:10 AM
I know its easy to jump to that conclusion especially if its something about yourself your not happy with. Its very common for people to assume this is the reason why .... (fill in the blank). Fact is, alot of men do like curvy women. I think its great your working on something about yourself that your not completly happy with, so keep it up! keep your confidence up. There is no deal, its just about what people like. From personal experience, no matter how good a person looks, its their attitude and personality that will turn me off faster than anything else. Also i noticed in your profile you say "I have a sassy attitude and sometimes can have quite the mouth on me" If this is coming across perhaps too strong in your exchanges, this may be the reason they break contact. Either way, your experience is quite common on this website for both sex's. Dont give up, you've just contacted the wrong people imo. Tim

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 39 (view)

How far to you go in your search? Posted: 7/26/2009 11:00:07 AM
I have no ties right now holding me down so distance for me is no problem. If things were to develop where we both wanted to be closer i would be open to moving or having her move to me.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 9 (view)

Housekeeping --- Does a messy place turn you off? Posted: 7/26/2009 10:29:48 AM
yes this is an absolute turnoff. Im not the neetest person either, but i need some sort of tideyness to promote a cheerfull atmosphere.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

What is Your definition of Drama? Posted: 7/26/2009 7:09:42 AM
It depends on what context the word is being used. Taking into context that we are on a dating site and this is "Ask A Guy", I believe jimmorrison4 said it best. When the word drama is used in relation to dating and relationships all of these come to mind. Overreacting to everything. Makes everything an issue. Believing if something little happens, like not being able to find a shoe, that God hates her. Looks for reasons to cause arguments. Gets paranoid and feels the relationship is falling apart, based on some crazy theory she made up. Thinks the world is out to get her.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

OK is this a Saturday-nite funk or wtf? Posted: 7/26/2009 1:22:58 AM
I think Lush correctly called it. They found someone else who was available and also made plans.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 32 (view)

why are women surprised when you do what they ask Posted: 7/26/2009 1:17:49 AM
I applaud you for staying true to your word where other's would have crumbled. Undoubtably you chose the safest bet, who knows what she may have accused you of if you would have "taken" advantage of the new situation. I think you acted with intelligence when faced with someone who obviously gets off on playing mind games with people. This also establishes a precident for you to move to the next step in the relationship as it seems she is now ready to do so as well. Good luck.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

Why do people lie? Posted: 7/25/2009 2:01:03 PM
We all lie Your thoughts? Speak for yourself.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

speaking manguage is hard. why did he disappear? Posted: 7/24/2009 6:41:57 AM
Going for the positive spin here. I dont think He disappeared emotionaly. Rather i believe he is behaving as he thinks its expected of him. Its a chance you take when you hide your true feelings. You may lose in the end. At some point some woman may have told him about the "friend zone" and he may have just assumed that is where you have catagorized him. Since it was like that from the beginning its a logical conclusion. Seemingly he has respected that and instead of destroying a shared companionship (schoolmates), he has kept his feelings to himself as well. I say take a chance and tell him how you feel. Try being honest about your feelings and develop things slowly. Ask him out on a date after telling him your intentions. Enjoy your time together. Dont flip out on him if the chemistry isnt there, after all If nothing else you have a good school mate to hang out with.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

Is he playing me Posted: 7/23/2009 3:19:11 AM
It sounds to me like you may desire more of his attention than he is willing to give. So in a way he is 'playing' because his actions dosent add up, he is not being upfront about something. Is it a game? hard to say, it may just be how he is...a flake. If you enjoy your time with him, i would invest no more emotions into it other than to just have a good time. I would turn the tables and find someone else that gives you the attention you appreciate while dating. Only go out with the flake when you want to have a good time and no one else is available. Just be upfront with everyone so someone else isnt asking, am i being played?

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 4 (view)

What is this guy thinking?! Posted: 7/21/2009 5:08:23 PM
Unless G knew he could be sleeping around as well (an open relationship etc) i'd say he was the only one who got used and recieved the worst of it. Sounds like he deserves and appology for being dumped on so badly. When you feel that you have to hide something, that should be your first indication that something may not be quite right with the situation or arrangement. I also have a sneaky suspicion that you have not seen the last of R. My guess is he got emotionaly involved and jealous. I bet you two could repair things. Just dont be hiding it or cheating on other people. Good luck.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 7 (view)

Am I over-reacting? Posted: 7/21/2009 1:24:11 PM
Kinda looks like things are even. He's here, your here. Not sure what the problem is. Unless you expect him to follow rules that you yourself do not. Then yeah i see a problem. If things are not how you need them to be, discuss them openly and honestly. Especialy honestly with yourself. If you cant live up to your own expectations, dont expect anyone else to. Now ignoring the fact your here as well, and assuming you are not flirting with guys and inviting them or being invited out... You have to tell him what you need in a relationship. Personaly myself, i would not be ok with my significant other partaking in the activities you have described. I also know people that do this, get off on it and will not change. Eventualy they will do it again. Good luck sorting things out and think of your happiness first. It may be time to move on.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

a Weird ending to a drum and bass night Posted: 7/21/2009 1:16:41 PM
I actualy made it to the end of your post. But alot of it ran together in my head waiting for a period. I'd say your next move is to do what you want. He's going to want sex again unless he's getting it some where else. So he will definatly come around again. Have fun and do what makes you happy.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

Is it me? Posted: 7/21/2009 11:11:28 AM
No you are not the reason he does this. He will do this to the next person as well. Yes it is you that does enable him to do this to you. My guess is you allowed this to happen as you thought you were in love with him. However this type will never change. Be it man or women as both sex's do this. A user and manipulator and when that fails uses guilt to get thier way. When that fail's they will blame you and finaly get angry. Get out while you can and waste no more of your heart/love on this person. They are not deserving.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 25 (view)

How to pull this off? Posted: 7/17/2009 3:52:56 AM
Its probably just good customer service. I used to visit a place once a week too, even last month when i went in there, my normal waitress had my drink (a pepsi) sitting at my table before i sat down. I always tip generously and i always have a great time there. So even if it is just good custormer service, thats no reason not to ask her out. I wouldnt drop off the buisness card though. Since you state your so charming i dont see you having any trouble here.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

Just waisted a month persuing someone... Posted: 7/16/2009 2:12:07 AM
Why would you want a mess like that in your life? Shes into games/drama and its always going to be there.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 8 (view)

What makes you feel good on a first date? Posted: 7/8/2009 11:45:21 PM
For me its all about her personality and if there is chemistry between us. The first few things i look for are if she is actualy ready to date or not. Meaning, she is over her ex. Its very painfull to go on a date and have the person complain about how their ex did this and that etc. Your there to get to know each other, not to know about each others ex's. She listens to what i have to say and doesnt focus on just herself. If i cant get a word in edgewise and she's going on and on about nothing, im not going to have a good time. She also doesnt take everything i say as a challenge to top me. And little ms. knowitall realy is a downer. Same with the heavy drinker. Pay attention to your date, listen to what they have to say and comment on it. Your there to meet them, keep focused on that. Dont spend the time on your cell/texting etc. Most of all, be honest.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

Boyfriend continues to get on POF behind my back?? Posted: 7/7/2009 7:05:54 PM
It sounds to me like you both are still into playing games. Your snooping on him behind his back, he's doing what ever it is that requires hiding. IMO You both deserve one another or its just a temporary relationship that will end of its own volition. Either way it doesnt sound fun. Good luck.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 439 (view)

Over 30 -- What is your biggest turn on Posted: 7/1/2009 3:37:24 PM
She still has her own teeth and they are not floatin in a jar on the nightstand.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 23 (view)

Conduct at P.O.F. partys A Sexuality issue Posted: 7/1/2009 3:15:17 PM
It would be nice if who ever took the pics down could explain what made the pictures inappropriate for the site. If for nothing else then to clear up what specifically was in violation so it wont be repeated again. No sense in someone getting banned without being told specifically what the reason is. I for one enjoy looking at the party pictures and hope this doesnt discourage future parties. Tim

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

Where will there be the Best Fireworks Show This Year??? Posted: 7/1/2009 2:50:42 PM
So does anyone have any guesses where the best fireworks show will be in michigan this year? I have not heard alot about it other than the mention of a few towns cancelling this year's fireworks show.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 5 (view)

Not interested? Posted: 6/30/2009 2:24:16 AM
If they are interested, they will show some interest. They will ask you questions, reply to your interests, send you messages not just answer ones you sent to them, etc. Thats how i look at it anyway.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

Help, I can't bring myself to kick him out... Posted: 6/26/2009 2:24:22 PM
I believe you have done your part to help him. More than what was ever expected for you to do. You have given him a second chance at a new start and he didnt take it. Your obligations are over and you are STILL a good person even when kicking him out. You followed up your agreement, he didnt his. The burdon should now be put on his head, not yours. Your a good person, you did the nice thing. He didnt. His loss. Feel no guilt what so ever.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 6 (view)

broke up with her AGAIN! Posted: 6/26/2009 3:17:28 AM
Sounds like a very nice lady to take you back. I dont know what to tell ya, but take it easy on her. She's gotta be hurting big time. Also if your on meds and missed a dose or stopped taking them, these can trigger the "weird feelings" you mention. Hope you get things worked out.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 9 (view)

What am I doing wrong? Posted: 6/26/2009 2:55:16 AM
I dont think you should have to be Motivating him. If he's realy into you, he would want to do things with you. Maybe thats just how i am, but it seems right to me. Dont be to hard on yourself. You can go crazy trying to figure out what people think.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 8 (view)

Why do people not respond when sent a message? Posted: 6/25/2009 2:51:57 PM
In my opinion guys learn bad manners from the ladies Exactly. Too many read/delete or just delete. After a while you begin to realise this is the way its done. You begin to dismiss some of your own social pleasantries in more favor of what is perceived to be the norm here. Which then breeds the second related question to this one. Why do so many men only send one line messages? Why? see above.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

i need some advice.... Posted: 6/23/2009 12:12:57 AM
If i was genuinely interested in a lady who was equally interested in me, there is nothing that would keep me from contacting her. Money?? Time?? I would make sure i got them both. I hope this helps you in some way.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

So guys uno question...... Posted: 6/23/2009 12:02:41 AM
It could be a number of things. Im just going to pick two random guesses. He could be losing interest in you. To make things more entertaining to him he trys to upset you and tick you off. To me this is unacceptable and i would break things off with him. Another reason may be he just wanted sex. He may have thought you would be so into him that you would bend your morals and sleep with him anyway. Now that he realises you wont, he is irritated by that fact. Either way, i would do what ever i could to break off contact with this person. He does not sound like a someone i would enjoy spending any time with. Keep looking, you deserve better. Tim

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 5 (view)

What if the woman pays on a 1st date? Posted: 6/22/2009 11:50:03 PM
What if the woman pays on a 1st date? Then that guy better put out! Just kidding. I have found it best to agree before we go out. This keeps things clear and doesnt leave anyone wondering what the others reasons may be for their choice. But to answer your question. I try not to have any preconceived notions as to what choice she makes and why. I find its best for me to come prepared to address which ever the circumstances dictate. I am ok with either way and yes i would let her only if she agree'd that i could get the next one. Tim

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 26 (view)

Hackers, good or bad? Posted: 6/20/2009 7:09:14 PM
ahh, but the real hackers are those who can hack people. I believe thats social engineering, yet another form i guess.

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 47 (view)

If you were a book, what would the title be? Posted: 6/20/2009 6:53:09 PM
I cant believe no one said " Moby d!ck "

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

I can feel my heart breaking.. Posted: 6/20/2009 6:39:48 PM
Sorry to hear about your pet, i can realy empathise with you. One thing that someone else has mentioned, reach out to your family. They can bring comfort that you might not have expected. Even though you can not see the light at the end of the tunnel at the moment, Trust us, weve been down that tunnel and its there. Your walk may just be longer than you expected. But it will be worth it in the end

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 7 (view)

I just think Why even bother again?.. Posted: 6/20/2009 6:26:54 PM
Hang in there! Your profile is perfect (imo), your attractive and interesting. I dont think your odd at all, as i realy like alot of the same things you list. Give it some time, things will get easier. Try to focus on the positives and not the negatives. I also believe its quite common for people to feel the way you do initialy. Just hang in there. Tim

justinx

Joined: 7/18/2008

Msg: 38 (view)

Promised to call. Didn't But checked POF mail HELP PLS Posted: 6/20/2009 6:04:34 PM
Well yes its inconsiderate imo. When i say im going to do something, i do it. But im different than most people. My opinion: I would suggest more face to face meetings before getting intimate with people. Chatting and talking over phone/net etc, doesnt realy count. People can do that with little to no effort. They dont have to shower, spend money, get dressed up etc. Face to face meetings/dates takes more effort. If they are always excited to get together, without the intimacy, then its a good chance they are into you. (no pun intended)

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