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smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 5 (view)

IM User Posted: 3/30/2008 12:24:11 AM
I am not able to use the im . I have gone through the instructions to uninstall the flash and rebooted etc and all that. I have tried to im and it won't go through from my end and yet the very same person I am trying to im can in fact im me and I can respond. Any other suggestions.

smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 96 (view)

Is there a song that describes you? Posted: 3/27/2008 10:56:13 PM
Mine would be Wildflower by skylark as well. Interesting that I was scrolling down the list trying to remember who wrote it and there is was in Bonnie's response. Always makes me feel like I have finally been understood. Also Into the Mystic byVan Morrison.

smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 12 (view)

Recovering and boosting immune system Posted: 3/6/2008 10:31:05 PM
Hope you are feeling a bit better soulbaby. I highly recommend the probiotics people are suggesting here. It is important to get one though that has the entire family strain of Lactobacillus. (there are 12 and they each other to create nutrients for the others in order to stay alive. Most cultures are dead bacteria (because of the lack of food the bacteria need to stay alive. ) I know one that is in a Barley juice powder you can check out www.edcwellness.ca and look at the RF 1 formula. it is made in Canada and is very reasonably priced as they sell whole direct anywhere in North America. Also you might want to detox your body when you are feeling stronger. D365 is the best and simplest I have ever experienced. Kills bacteria, candida, fungus and viruses. So many of these bugs lately are making their rounds more than once and the anti biotics (as mentioned before kill everything off indiscriminately) D365 only goes after the anerobic (negative ) bacteria. Best of luck and get well soon.

smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 250 (view)

Have you really ever felt really lonely? Posted: 9/13/2007 10:04:31 AM
I have had many moments in my life when I felt lonely. Being married to a commercial fisherman who was away alot was a very lonely time of life. When he got home and things started to go sour it was the most lonely experience of my life. A different kind of lonliness. Probably worse. Having someone right there and still lonely. My youngest child moved away to Australia and I miss her so much. Now being alone I have my moments, and have wallowed in self pity and lonliness. I was always looking for something or someone outside me to fill that void. I have recently been doing some deep personal growth and the suggestion I was given was to use a working definition of LONELY "It is the emotion and experience of isolation resulting from the belief in separation. The emotional response to being shut down. " To be lonely is to be shut down to the thing you want. You cannot have love if your heart is closed. Most of the time, we are totally unaware that we are shut down. Unaware that we are afraid. In response to being unaware, we seek and crave or lust after the very thing we believe we cannot have. We are never lonely for a person or a thing. We are seeking an experience we believe we cannot have. When experiencing loneliness, open your heart. Ask that the Divine (whatever that is to you) to fill you with love. When you feel it, remember to breathe. It will not kill you. Allow love to fill your entire being. The moment you can do this, open your heart and yourself to the experience of love, and every other thing you think you want will miraculously appear. As said in the Course of Miracles , "The Holy Spirit will always respond to your slightest invitation. " A couple of mantra's I have tried are: I am love being loved. There is no shortage of love. I release all thoughts, doubts, and fears that this is not possible. I am an expression of all that love is. For this I am so grateful!. And so it is. Namaste.

smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 10 (view)

played for a fool ? Posted: 8/7/2007 11:10:33 PM
I don't think you are played for a fool. Just maybe thought he was free from his past. Is he divorced? If not then I think the wife gets the priority. One never knows where it can go. Sounds like they have some stuff to work out and if they do there will be nothing you can do or say to change that. If they can become friends then he can heal the past and move on to a healthy relationship with you. Otherwise I think you just get the baggage and stuff he couldn't work out with her on your plate.

smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 78 (view)

Diamond Ring- where is yours now -on your finger or in a drawer? Posted: 7/29/2007 12:17:08 AM
First marriage both rings were stolen by my son or his drug addicted friends. I had been saving them for my daughter. Second marriage I never got the diamond (he was pretty broke at the time) I said I only wanted a simple band. I did take it off for sometime after the separation and put it in a cupboard but recently with hopes of a reconsilliation, which I shared with him my feelings I started wearing it on my right hand. Interesting that this topic has come up as recently when at my grandsons first birthday my ex decided this would be a good place to introduce his new POF girlfriend to me. I was so hurt and pissed off I found myself switching it back to the left hand and telling her I was uncomfortable and awkward being with my husband and the woman he sleeps with. OOPS and I did apologize. I have since moved it back to the right hand and now I am not sure what to do with it. After 22 years of wearing it, I find it hard to imagine it meant nothing.

smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 124 (view)

are you over your ex? Posted: 4/30/2007 9:51:53 AM
Interesting post as it applies to me these days. It has been over 7 years since I separated from my husband of 21 years and there have been times when I was able to truly focus on just me and how I was being. Those were the moments when I had the most relief and felt like I was coming to a point of acceptance and surrender. Over him. Nadda. It comes and goes. Sometimes it is an obsession others it is moment by moment of letting go. He lives in the same small town as me and our paths haven't crossed much except to do with the kids. That is a bit of a relief, but recently he has met someone, I believe on this site and though it is none of my business, I was shocked and surprized at my reaction. Set a lot of old feelings into motion and I have to work at my serenity everyday not to get caught up in obsessing about him. Guess one would say I am definitely not over him. Everywhere I go he seems to be . I had expressed my feelings to him (before the new woman came into his life) that I would like to reconsile and at least work to become friends. It has become obvious (albiet difficult to swallow) that he does not care about me. My biggest challenge is to know that it is ok for me to love someone , but not to have the expectation that they would love me back. The death of Love is a painful but growing experience. The last 7 years have brought big changes to my life. There were solid reasons to be apart. I only wish to be able to move on and have an open heart. I signed on to this site to meet new friends. Dating is still hard for me although I have many friends to do things with. Even God can't change the past, and knows the future for me. I think there is a grieving process that has to take place whenever anything ends. I just have to be willing to follow that path no matter what it is. All the best fishing.

smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 20 (view)

Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive? Posted: 11/9/2006 11:34:30 AM
I have been separated for almost 7 years. When my husband saw someone else early on I was devastated because I felt it was the death of love. That been said I too have had a couple of intense relationships since then. So I know it is a two way street. I was not ready to personally move on yet and although it was wonderful in the moment I knew I hadn't on some level completed the process of grieving. I agree that men seem to be able to move on more quickly. And also realize that is a generilization that doesn't always hold true. I am listed as separated here as there has never been a final divorce. For whatever reasons that is ok with me and know it will come when the relationship ends in friendship. My husband is also online and lists himself as single. That is the way he feels and the obvious difference between us. Neither is wrong just 2 different perspectives on who we really are. Probably the reason we aren't together in the first place. I believe cheating is when someone is lying to the other. Try to play both sides of the fence and not allowing the other the honour of being truthful. It is crazy making for the one who doesn't have all the information to make choices based on the truth of what is really going on. As far as forgiveness goes. What is to forgive? We are all souls trying our best to be human beings in the most difficult times. Each of us has the right to make mistakes and not have it held against us. Not that it doesn't hurt just that it is something we have on some level chosen to experience. The shame would be to carry the resentment and harm ourselves. Letting go is not easy and it comes in all sorts of forms. I try to beware of the green eyed monster of jealousy and work on my own self esteem instead. That can't be found through another.

smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

Are you embarrassed of your occupation? Posted: 10/19/2006 9:28:03 AM
It it is not important what you are doing so much as who you are being while you are doing it? Sometimes when I am doing my work and not feeling good about me, I get embarrassed of what it is I have chosen as a career. People have a lot of judgement around my chosen profession. I run a Networkmarketing company and I hear alot of misinformed people say stuff like Scam and Pyramid etc. based on past experiences where it didn't work for them. And in fact maybe it had been a bad experience. I can get defensive and question my self and my motives. Sometimes I take it personally and take on their negative energy. When I am in fit condition emotionally, spiritually and physically. I know in my heart that what I do is amazing and how fortunate I am to Be in this position. It is all a matter of where my self esteem is at. I agree that it is unfair that someone would judge you on a business of choice. Someone has to make the coffee. There is a role for each of us to carry out. Maybe that person is afraid of something and their self esteem is caught in the material world. You may have reflected that fear back to them or vice versa.

smartchoice

Joined: 9/20/2005

Msg: 35 (view)

How does child support work if? Posted: 10/25/2005 9:59:04 PM
I am not sure where you live, but when I had an order for child support I kept in the provincial court system ( BC. Canada) It is free to get an application for a change of order and can appear in court without a lawyer. It gives you a space to explain any changes since your original order. There is a Federal child support table available on line and the one I am looking at now says -parents have shared custody or access to the child at least 40% of the time. That was your original question. The table provides the amount you would pay according to your income. Annual income is the money a person earns from employment and self-emplayment and the income from investments. This includes all sources of income identified in your tax return. If you are unsure , a T4 slip or Revenue Canada Assessment may give you an indication of annual income.

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