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Thread: Phone etiquette

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 74 (view)

Phone etiquette Posted: 10/18/2009 11:27:59 AM
OP, first you have to determine if the lady in question has a "hands free" device. If not, this relationship is going nowhere in a hurry, regardless of how many phone dates you have.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 113 (view)

is it him or me?? Posted: 9/19/2009 7:48:37 PM
Not only do the girls at college look more mature and provocative these days, but even high school girls can look like they just stepped out of a dancing cage at a night club. The response this guy would have received from me would have gone something like this.... " I know, it is unbelieveable that they think they can put their sexuality out there and then b1tch about being viewed as purely sexual beings, then tossed aside when those guys with the 8 pack abs, shirts unbuttoned to the waist, and the rock hard butts (not that I noticed how much more of a hard body today's guys are than in my cohort) toss them aside like yesterday's newspaper. I mean really!!!" Come on, we all look, and if an innocent comment is going to get you that riled up, perhaps there are other issues in the relationship to begin with. This to me, is all about the man's intent. Was it his intention to make a social comment about the state of youth these days.....or was it his intent to belittle his girlfriend by making unseemly and creepy comments about his daughter's peers? I doubt the latter. For as long as time, generational gaps have existed, and I can remember adults making comments about my contemporaries during the "punk" era. Conclusion....It is you.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 138 (view)

should I tell His wife he's cheating? Posted: 9/19/2009 3:13:36 PM
If I were that wife....I would want to know the truth, and she has a right to know the truth. If someone had irrefutable proof that this was taking place, I wouldnt care who told me. At least that would give me the opportunity to make my own choices that were right for me, including NOT having sex with the cheating b@st@rd and exposing myself to god knows what. Maybe if more people were committed to revealing the cheaters to their partners, there would be less of them.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 69 (view)

How soon can you spot a red flag Posted: 9/13/2009 5:55:28 PM
A date is not whats in it for your interest but what benefits you can get This statement does not make sense....one's interests and one's benefits amount to the same thing. The reason I date or get involved with someone is because the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. We complement each other. We learn from each other. We enhance each other. We support each other. We have interest in the other's well being and growth. It is not about how I benefit, so much as what I can give to the situation. The red flags come into play when the object of my affection is only interested in how he can benefit or is out for his own interests.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 55 (view)

How soon can you spot a red flag Posted: 9/13/2009 11:37:30 AM
The real danger lies in those who are able to conceal their real character until you are "together" or compromised in some way. Red flags flappin' in the breeze like the ones that have been suggested, are easy enough to see and avoid. It is when everything seems to be sailing along on a perfectly normal course and suddenly one day, out of the blue you hear something like...."there is no way you should be making the kind of money you do, you dont contribute anything of value to society". Then the buzzers go off, the siren blasts, lights start flashing and you are sitting there wondering what it was you ever saw in that individual.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

Her sister is coming Posted: 9/12/2009 6:14:09 AM
So what I read from you OP is you are threatened by the relationship your girlfriend has with her sister.....and it is all about YOU. People are either part of the solution or part of the problem. Instead of b1tching and complaining about the situation, why dont you jump in and be supportive, help your girlfriend set up for her arrival, pull together some information that will help her form some direction on her studies, maybe some social groups that she could join to make some friends of her own. You are making this out to be a disaster before anything really happens and it is totally selfish and unbecoming of you. I agree with pssst, if one of my family members needed my help and support, I wouldnt let anyone stand in my way of helping them out. If they reacted in a negative way to my support of them, I would have to consider their character and how they define love.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 21 (view)

EX question Posted: 9/11/2009 8:55:50 PM
OP....I would think that you are a very secure individual, and I would start to wonder what it was I saw in you. I think if you trust your partner, you allow them the freedom in their life they deserve. If you dont have trust, then the relationship is doomed from the beginning. You might want to consider that you can't control anything, only your response to what is going on around you. And if you respond in a way that makes her question YOUR loyalty, things could backfire on you. In other words, only those who are not trustworthy find they cant trust others.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 181 (view)

The real problem with relationships today. Posted: 9/9/2009 7:24:53 PM
If I were to add on one more thing, and to a certain extent, a lack of faith in a marriage and leaving out God. Who's god should we include? Just wondering. His or hers?

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 17 (view)

Same dreams Posted: 9/8/2009 9:25:43 PM
Dreams are a product of the subconscious trying to work out various problems one may have in their waking life. Paying attention to the dreams can give us clues as to how to solve our problems in our lives. This is why many people with stress, real life problems or psychosis of some nature can have very wild and frequent, and occassioanally disturbing dreams....the subconsciousis exploring the solution possibilities. People who lead calm, organized, easy going lives do not dream as much, or at least as violently. Their dreams, if they can remember them are generally passive or enjoyable in nature.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 102 (view)

Casual blowjobs Posted: 9/8/2009 7:10:53 PM
^^^^OR.....maybe you have just made a few bad choices in your life. But I understand...it is much easier on your ego if you can blame every woman on the planet for your problems. How's that workin' for ya!!!??

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 43 (view)

Problems with my mother Posted: 9/7/2009 7:59:33 PM
So...any chance the hard times your friend has befallen has something to do with him being an outlaw?? Either he just got out of the pen, or is on his way in once the trial is over?? If you dont specify the reasons why this guy is on hard times, it is very difficult to provide a good assessment of yours or your mothers judgement.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 101 (view)

So many young divorces Posted: 9/7/2009 7:51:33 PM
There is more divorce today period. Why? Because women now have choices. They work, and for the most part in the west, at equal pay, they can more afford to support themselves than they did in the past. So they dont have to stay with a man and put up with any abuse, disrespect, lack of attention to their needs, slovenly behavior, alcoholic rages, rape, cheating or other BS. In the past, due to the reliance on the man's income and the lack of support services available for women in crisis, they stayed in a marriage that didnt work. Assuming it was better than being on the street with their kids and starving. One of the problems with this is, men havent quite figured out that they need to change up their game in order to acquire and maintain a marriage/relationship worth having to women of the 21st century. They cannot be the philandering, self absorbed arses that might have been indulged in the past. Women with any self respect, expect and demand more, and for those that have evolved beyond the lifestyle of 1952, the rewards will be well worth the effort it takes to have a modern relationship. But it seems too many men want the fruits of a woman's efforts in the workplace and a full time "wife" at home looking after their needs. Let me be clear....not ALL men are like this, but many (too many, in fact).....yet there are some men who genuinely expect a fair and equitable partnership based on love, trust, respect and mutual cooperation.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 25 (view)

Guilt from the past Posted: 9/6/2009 4:23:48 AM
i didnt mind the abusive ex, drugs, etc..., she cheated in her past, and thats a dealbreaker for me Now OP...you have just lost whatever modicum of credibility one is afforded here by coming late with this little detail. I dont believe it for a second that this is what caused you to dump her (or even it this really happened) otherwise, you would have included this main reason in your opening post. As I stated previously, she is fortunate to start anew with someone who has the strength of heart and integrity to support her.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 5 (view)

Guilt from the past Posted: 9/5/2009 7:07:50 PM
That's too bad that your couldnt have been supportive and let her confession of all of this to you be her release from the past. It could have gone an entirely different way if you were mature and open enough to deal with everything. I only hope that she doesnt bury her anxiety about this and hold it back after having to deal with your reaction to her unburdoning, rather than continue to confront her demons. Clearly she is better off without you and hopefully she will find a partner that can support her and allow her the freedom to move beyond her past. And I'm sure your next girlfriend will be a big bowl of cherries, all sweetness and light, and have never had an issue in her life! You should learn to deal with some issues son, the next one may be one you wont want to let go of.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 23 (view)

MANIPULATION V Posted: 9/5/2009 6:19:47 AM
That relationship was doomed from the beginning. No truth, no trust, no respect and no communication. Regardless of who was manipulating who, these people havent got a clue about what forms the basis of a relationship. It sounds like their mutual deceptions prevented further dilution of the gene pool.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 73 (view)

Rules Posted: 9/4/2009 8:51:01 PM
Tina....it is not about "cool". You are taking a commonly used term that describes a group of individuals and using the term to describe a behavior you find to be disparaging, which implies that you find "gays" distasteful in the least and unacceptable at the worst. That is what some may find offensive. It would be like me saying, "you're sanctimonious behavior is so fekking catholic, you're really a fekking drag". This is disparaging toward catholics, and some catholics may even find it offensive. To use "gay" to describe behavior you find unacceptable does not show your character in the best light.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 75 (view)

Why do women try to make men feel quilty? Posted: 9/4/2009 8:35:36 PM
What a load of shite. Oye yurself!! If you choose to date passive aggressive drama queens, who make their problems your problems, you can hardly blame the entire gender on your bad judgement. I dont care what someone does, how they behave, moan or whine, they will not make me feel anything I dont want to feel about a situation. It is called AWARENESS!! Awareness of who you are, what people are all about, what is important, what is not....no one can make you feel guilty, unless there is substance and reason. And even then...highly unlikely. Guilt, like jealousy is a wasted emotion. Not worth the energy.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 56 (view)

Rules Posted: 9/3/2009 7:45:14 PM
My rule.....Never write a check your ass cant cash. On a more serious Shakespearian note....This above all....to thine own self be true! And everything else from that fatherly advice Polonius gave his son Laertes (from Hamlet)

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 46 (view)

whats up with the NO DRAMA on profiles Posted: 9/2/2009 3:50:43 PM
NO DRAMA What does this mean to me....the person doesnt want to find themselves on the Jerry Springer show a year from now taking a lie detector test, confronting 8 people still married to your partner, determining the paternity of a child or wrestling with someone who is hell bent on exposing their boobs on national TV. There is a huge difference between excitement or adventure versus drama and jail. I think we all know a drama king/queen when we are in their presence. They are the ones throwing a drink in their date's face or peeling out of the parking lot, leaving their date standing in their dust screaming for the cops. There is a lot to be said for a peaceful, balanced life.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 2 (view)

Flirtatious Fifties? Posted: 9/1/2009 8:37:54 PM
OMG, you need to free yourself of this wanton woman, move east, and let me help you forget her nasty ways.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 63 (view)

Weird tests ... Posted: 9/1/2009 8:33:08 PM
The only test anyone needs to pass before entering a relationship is an STD test. That is the only test that anyone should expect of another.....and pass themselves. I'm sure the guys out hear just cringe reading this one, it sure would tend to give some men a bad rap. We have to remember, not all guys are this stupid or transparent, go find yourself one worthy of your company, cause this guy sure isnt. BTW....the real test you passed was figuring out how full of BS this guy really is. Congratulations!!! Your prize is never having to spend another second thinking of this low life again.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 2 (view)

Why do women try to make men feel quilty? Posted: 8/31/2009 8:11:29 PM
No one can make another feel guily, unless they are guilty. Are you willing to acknowledge that your feelings are your own and that they’re entirely your responsibility? I am perfectly willing to acknowledge this, so why wouldnt we expect the same of any man who feels guilty. Isnt that his feelings that should be acknowledged. If he isnt guilty, nothing she could say should make him feel that way.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 141 (view)

Why do YOU still make the effort. Posted: 8/31/2009 7:16:28 PM
Because it is easier to love than fear. Love does not take energy from you, but fills you up with more. Love is the only thing we can truly all share in common. Love is the reason we are here.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 41 (view)

Do women think about sex as much as men? Posted: 8/30/2009 4:06:09 PM
Do women think about sex as much as men? Do you mean like NOW!!! or.....NOW? how about NOW? Yes....is the answer, at least for some of us.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 89 (view)

The real problem with relationships today. Posted: 8/30/2009 3:59:39 PM
^^^"There came a time when staying tight within the bud became more painful than the strain it took to blossom." -Anais Nin ... Sometimes, we are compelled to wait until the pressure gets to be more than we can stand until we push aside our fears and confront the obstacles we face in our relationships.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 68 (view)

Define committed relationship after 60 Posted: 8/30/2009 3:25:37 PM
I think there is a difference between committing to the other, or committment to the relationship, preserving it at all costs. I am fully prepared to commit to another, and this to me, means supporting that person to allow them to achieve their full potential in life, whatever that may be. Two people must be more than the sum of their parts, then their commitment to each other will have the ability to be sustained. Those who commit to the relationship that feel, "we have to work it out, no matter what" have lost focus on what is important.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 79 (view)

why do men say they will call and then don't? Posted: 8/30/2009 2:57:25 PM
I would say there is a certain segment of the dating population that keeps a number of people on the go at the same time. Depending on who else in their stable that may or may not be available, you may or may not be the priority for that person at any given time. If you are OK with that, or doing something similar yourself, no problem. But if you feel undervalued or are unhappy with the lack of consideration, dont waste your time with this kind of person, they will likely always be looking to improve their hand.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 83 (view)

The real problem with relationships today. Posted: 8/30/2009 10:36:04 AM
The problem today, is many people do not live a life of truth. They disguise who they are, dont KNOW who they are because they are so influenced by pop culture and preconditioning, are more focused on projecting a certain image, say what they think people want to hear or mask their true intentions. When the truth is finally revealed, and it usually is, it is no wonder disappointment leads to heart break and break ups. IMO, they do this out of FEAR, fear of not being loved for their "real" self. Over time, the ego takes over the self and protects it from criticism, perceived injustice, rejection, humiliation. It creates defensive mechinisms for the self to be preserved, but what happens is the "self" gets pushed further and further from the forefront, so in time, the only part of one that we see is the ego based version of the individual, who is acting out of fear, instead of acceptance and love. The relationship is based on a set of falsehoods which is doomed for failure.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 111 (view)

What would you think/do if... Posted: 8/30/2009 9:49:46 AM
I think I would set my bruised ego aside, and get on with life. Is it really such a big deal that people need to get so upset about a ring. Would you rather she stay silent and feign her "love" of your choice....to me that would be $5k wasted. Now she has a ring she loves, your support of her choice, if you can manage to give it, and a happy wife makes for a happy life. She paid for it herself....what's the big deal? A gold digger would have pouted and withheld sex until the groom paid for the upgrade. (at least that is what I have learned of their behavior from these forums) I personally dont like it if I buy something for someone and it is something they really dont like and wont use, much better to have them exchange it for something they will appreciate. Then again...I'm not really a sentimental fool. If the ring becomes more important than honesty and open communication, then you really dont have a relationship worth keeping anyway.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 17 (view)

The infamous disappearing woman, or is it just something about me?? Posted: 8/30/2009 7:52:17 AM
Whoa....there is a lot of thanking going on and not much communication. Anyone who aspires to live in a world of "texting" would be on the outs for me. I want to talk to a real person, about real things. I dont want to be thanked for my thank you. "Your welcome" is the appropriate response. And the previous poster was right...you have smothered her and she is likely thinking things have moved way to fast, it speaks of desperation and few women want a man as desperate as you appear to be. Back off and give her some space, if she comes back, try not to overwhelm her again, or you will push her away for good. And try paragraphs sometime, they are fun.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 5 (view)

Do women think about sex as much as men? Posted: 8/29/2009 3:19:02 PM
Emotionally and physcially healthy women think and talk about sex often. And given opportunity with the right partner, have as much interest as men. If your woman is not as interested in having as much sex with you as you would like to have with her, I suspect it is more about the nature of the sex, and whether or not, each is giving and getting as much out as they need. Some people can be very selfish lovers, it doesnt take long for that to become tiresome and hence, easy to take a pass on.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 51 (view)

Who decides what is reasonable? Posted: 8/29/2009 1:42:50 PM
OP, you were in a relationship where you feared being you, by retreating, instead of expressing yourself fully, and trusting your partner would understand. Truthfully, if I was with someone who couldnt be their true self with me, I dont think I would stick around in that situation either. If you were willing to deny who you were in these situations, perhaps this is something fundamental in your character, that also comes into play in other, less dramatic scenarios, and he, if he had any intuition at all, may have gotten the sense that he really didnt know, or love, the real you. Only the image, shadow of your true self you would allow him to see and for many, that wouldnt be good enough.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 43 (view)

POWER Posted: 8/29/2009 1:15:57 PM
The need for power in a relationship is driven by the ego. When 2 people are in a mutually respectful, loving relationship, they each surrender to each other, place their trust and faith in the other, and give themselves to the ultimate power between them which is LOVE. Love is not love when jealous, domineering, subordinating, manipulative, fearful, deceitful, condescending, controlling...these are all ego based constructs, and any power derived from these false agents can easily be eradicated. These things are all at the root of one's fears. Fear of losing money, being made a fool, being deceived, rejected, dishonored. If people are using money or sex as the dominating forces in the relationship, each one struggling for the power over the other, letting their ego guide them, they will ultimately fail. People like this are not in touch with their true self or understand the true nature of love. The ultimate power comes from within and is fueled by love, but to acheive this, one must overcome the ego and surrender. That can only be achieved from knowing oneself and choosing to live a life of love, free of fear. And very few appear to be able or willing to do this.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 24 (view)

SOS Posted: 8/26/2009 7:21:29 PM
How nice to read a happy story at the end of a long day. Namaste.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 30 (view)

Why do women find criminals hot? Posted: 8/25/2009 8:16:48 PM
Only a woman with potential criminal intent would find a man like this hot. Someone attempting to take the "shortcut" they think they are entitled to, would appeal to a woman with absolutely no integrity. They fall for these guys, because most women with these thoughts dont have the guts or skills required to pull off this crap themselves. They are lazy, ignorant low lifes who are looking for an easy way out....I'm sure some of them think they are Bonnie to his Clyde.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 52 (view)

What to do,What to do? Posted: 8/25/2009 3:47:46 PM
I can absolutely guarantee that the main reason for him not letting you into his house is FEAR[/]. What is behind that fear is anyone's guess, although the previous posters have provided some plausible reasons. The question is....why does he have this fear? Is it because he doesnt "trust" the depth of the relationship yet. If he is of meager means, maybe he cant let you see that, if he has a room mate, that might be an issue, particularly if there is more than friendship status there. It could be any reason, but FEAR is definitely his issue. He could believe that whatever he is hiding will be the downfall of the relationship. Are you prepared to give him the assurance it wont? If he is waiting until your love is unconditional, you better prepare yourself for what ever he is hiding. I had an ex who wouldnt take me to his mother's house to meet her, although I spoke to her on the phone dozens of times and she lived 5 minutes away. Turns out....her place was full of stuff, everywhere and anywhere, in no particular state of organization. She was hoarding everything and it was all staked in plain sight. It was over whelming!!

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

are you still sexually experimenting? Posted: 8/25/2009 4:05:52 AM
Well...yes....but I am still looking for a lab partner.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 214 (view)

I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc. Posted: 8/24/2009 9:04:00 PM
In terms of relationship, I would never consider anything less than a 50/50 compromise comfortable. Sometimes 50/50 is 90/10 for you and other times 90/10 for me, depending on capabilty and needs...and it should all balance out. If there isnt balance, one will likely always feel cheated, undervalued or taken advantage of. Everyone's terms are somewhat different. That is what works for me.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 212 (view)

I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc. Posted: 8/24/2009 8:51:22 PM
cinsy....you are definitely one of my favs....but holy cow, you are dating all the wrong kind of woman. There are actually some out there that are not the stereotypical nightmares you describe. If you lived a little closer and I was 10 year younger...... We all have our trials and tribulations where "new" people in our lives are concerned. It is easy to point the finger in the other direction...but I choose to have some compassion, empathy and understanding for the other sex, because I just assume, he may be going through as much anxiety over the whole experience as well, albeit, on different aspects of it than me. I have seen guys take artistic license with their reality as well. When it comes right down to it....it is a complete crap shoot, and it makes sense to stay away from the long odds.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 58 (view)

20/30 Pics Instead of Written Profiles Posted: 8/24/2009 4:30:15 PM
^^^^You would think so, wouldnt you!

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 176 (view)

Is this enough to ditch her? Posted: 8/23/2009 6:25:44 PM
or like has a d*ck that u dont know about?? I must say....this thought crossed my mind as well. Unless he absolutely knows otherwise, it is a possibility and would add stress to the relationship. She could definitely fear owning up to something like that after 4 years.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 56 (view)

20/30 Pics Instead of Written Profiles Posted: 8/23/2009 5:12:05 PM
I would like to see photos like: * With their friends ~ having fun ~ genuinely happy smiles * With their family ~ hopefully enjoying themselves with same happy smiles * With their pets ~ oh please no snakes... * On vacation ~ their favorite places tell alot ~ like Vegas & New York ~ or Yosemite and Costa Rica? * At work (if they have work) ~ messy desk or tidy ~ skyscraper or outdoors or ? * Of their home ~ inside and out (I love looking at gardens and decorating) Does he love minimal furniture or lots of stuff? Traditional? Asian? Condo or home? City or country? Bachelor pad or neatnick? You may just see 75 photos of mom on the living room wall.... * Of some of their prized treasures ~ trophys, a totem pole they carved, a fav picture, a guitar collection, the ugly lamp you'll be trying to decorate around if things get serious....lol * Their bookshelf (if they have one) ~ or is it a CD library ~ or both? * Their transportation ~ Camry, SUV, skateboard, purple Dodge Demon with red doors? * Their bedroom ~ hopefully normal with no unusual devices hanging from the ceiling or walls....lol * Their toys ~ boats, motorcycles, jet skis, campers, airplanes, hang gliders, kayaks... * Other hobbies ~ stonework, craftsmanship, glass blowing, stamp collecting.... Gee...let's leave something to discover by actually getting to know a person. All I want to know from the pictures is....does he have most of his teeth, will he scare small children and is he tall enough to go "on this ride". The rest I hope to discover through actual conversation and human interaction. Novel, I know.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

not understanding this at all Posted: 8/23/2009 5:24:09 AM
OP...you dont say how long it has been since you heard from him....6 hours....a day or 2, a week? If it has only been a couple of days, just chill....guys need time to be with their guys, ground themselves a bit and absorb what is happening. Being in that situation with you, feeling something he may not be familiar with, he may have a sense of losing control. His ego doesnt like to be out of control, so he backs off until he feels he has regained that control. Best to let him come back to you, at his own pace, and just dont make a big deal of it....let things take their natural course, and be cool. If you start interrogating him on what was going on, he will recoil again, maybe this time for good. In the meantime, find some other worthwhile things to do, putting all of your focus on the relationship isnt healthy or productive.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 134 (view)

Is this enough to ditch her? Posted: 8/22/2009 2:46:21 PM
I know I will be going somewhat against the grain here.....but.... Going with someone for that length of time and no intimacy is not just about saving yourself for marriage. She is deliberately using this as an excuse to not further the level of intimacy between you, keep you at arm's length, literally. Let's face it....this is the 21st century....even during Victorian times, people your age were getting more intimate than you are now. There are more deep rooted issues at play here. Is it possible she has a fear of intimacy due to some abuse as a child or adolescent? Or she has some unrealistic puritan views of sexuality? Poisoned by fundamental, religious dogma. Completely overwhelmed and uncertain of her ability to meet yours (or anyone's needs sexuality) or paralysis by analysis. In any event, enough is enough....if this is for real, get out in the real world and find someone who realizes sexuality is a natural part of human interaction and wont be offended, afraid or overwhelmed by getting naked.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 9 (view)

last 5 forum posts.. gone. Posted: 8/22/2009 2:04:14 PM
I missed the earlier thread....but....how do we know this isnt just some server maintenance or a storage issue and these features will return when the work is completed. Usually there would be an announcement as there was when the IM feature was disabled, advising everyone. Perhaps the data maxed out some of the functionality and they brought it down while they optimized the service. Would be nice to know.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 30 (view)

20/30 Pics Instead of Written Profiles Posted: 8/22/2009 11:58:50 AM
I think the pictures are important...however, assuming the POFer actually writes their own profile, they can be very revealing, letting us know the intelligence of a prospect and their ability to communicate effectively. I have an appreciation for the written word, and what people say, can provide better insight into the psyche. And besides, anyone can photoshop a picture.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

Suggestion : New options for profile parameters? Posted: 8/22/2009 10:43:18 AM
^^^That is true....but you cant filter searches when they are in the body of a profile. Having them listed in a drop down menu, will allow users to filter their searches to their specific preferences.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 24 (view)

If Relationships Were Simpler.. Posted: 8/21/2009 8:53:18 PM
Can she bake blueberry pies? YES! but only with WILD blueberries. Blueberry is my favorite, but it has to be homemade, slighty runny and with tiny fresh blueberries. I could eat the whole thing myself, warm, with just a little vanilla ice cream. Yum!

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

Is it really that odd to not have a pet? Posted: 8/21/2009 4:34:54 PM
I love dogs, always had one in our family growing up....and had a couple of Bouviers years ago during my marriage. But...my lifestyle now does not accommodate having any pets. I travel for work frequently, am often out to dinner on company business and many weekends in the summer are spent on a golfcourse, and I leave the country for several weeks a year on various vacations. If you cant provide proper attention and care for a pet, why have them....that would be selfish. Anyone who wouldnt date me because I didnt have a pet is too worried about the ridiculous and lacks any kind of practicality for me to be bothered with.

Joined: 8/2/2008

Msg: 148 (view)

I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc. Posted: 8/21/2009 3:50:45 PM
it's largely all on him to get things started BUT Margo...so many dont get things started at all. Many men do not put themselves out there. I try to make a point of finding at least one interesting profile a week to contact and get to know someone. I have made the first move too many times to count and some even got to the point where I was asking to "meet up" or a go on a date. Almost every single guy would sooner sit on their butt and do nothing or come up with some lame azz excuse than meet up and go out. So....I dont see the men on here getting much started at all, and even after some reasonable back and forth discussion cant even find the energy to get out of the house. So....at least for the time being, I am also here just for the forums, and will concentrate on the real world to find companionship. Disclaimer......These comments are based on my personal POF experiences and in no way meant to criticize the select few of you who actually have a life and are determined to live it. Offer not valid in Quebec.

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