Virginity keep it or blow it??? chat & forums.

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Thread: Virginity keep it or blow it???

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 33 (view)

Virginity keep it or blow it??? Posted: 10/16/2009 2:06:34 PM
Should a persons virginity be held as something special and important in these changing times? That depends on each individual... My first time wasn't "special" by any means but I didn't need it to be, I'm not the ooey gooey lovey type. Some people need that connection though. I think that anyone in this situation should just ask themselves, "Will I regret this if it's not meaningful?". If the answer is now, boootay!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 220 (view)

That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 10/16/2009 2:04:22 PM
I agree with you, OP- Everybody needs a little booty, but I think the difference here is: men who wine and dine IN ORDER to get sex... and men who wine and dine because they like you- and sex happens to be a part of that. There are some men out there who will take you on fancy dates and try to wooo you in order to just get laid.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 28 (view)

A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ? Posted: 10/16/2009 1:54:48 PM
How many women, and men have not had sex by the end of their 2 nd date, and because of this, were turned down for a 3 rd date ? lol, this sure does seem like a role reversal here. I have a 4 date sex rule- as in, NO sex until at least the 4th date... if a guy can't wait that long then he was only looking for one thing in the first place, and not worth my time. That goes either way, regardless of gender. JMO.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 42 (view)

Would this bother you and should I talk to him about it? Posted: 10/16/2009 1:49:58 PM
I haven't read the whole thread, only the OP- but I think your male friend is right... I think your boyfriend is in love with his friend and that may or may not ever go away... Either way- are you satisfied being "second on the totem pole"?

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 38 (view)

The girl I was seeing, wont talk to me after the party at her house, any advice? Posted: 10/7/2009 10:37:27 AM
Uhh... it might have something to do with the fact that you, your girlfriend, and her friends all sound like a bunch of immature 8th graders. Sounds to me like you got way too drunk, were acting in immature manner, they decided they didn't like you and continued on with the immaturity and now either due to your girlfriends own disgust with your behavior or due to the fact her friends don't like you- she doesn't want to talk to you. Either way- Just grow up already.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 152 (view)

What do you think about people who have psychics' readings? Posted: 10/6/2009 3:52:39 PM
I've not had a reading from a "psychic" but I have been to see a "medium" on several occasions. It started as a work fundraiser for cancer. This lady knew nothing about my life and yet dove right into it, my Grandfather, my Aunt, and my Uncle who were all passed came through (she told me who they were without even asking if they were dead) and she started talking about certain events & aspects of my life, things that couldn't possibly be a generalization or anything she could have found from googling me even if she had all of my personal information. The first time I went was the single most intense moment of my life, and yet also the most comforting. I walked in a skeptic and walked out a believer- If it wasn't for that experience- I wouldn't have any beliefs at all. That said- I do believe there are people who truly have gifts and people who take advantage- you do need to find someone genuine.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 108 (view)

The real problem with relationships today. Posted: 8/31/2009 11:56:01 AM
I think the "real" problem with relationships today, is that it's become socially acceptable to QUIT when the going gets tough. No one feels the need to try anymore- always more fish in the sea :) so people are choosing to flight instead of fight.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 28 (view)

Confusing rejection Posted: 8/31/2009 11:51:28 AM
I don't think you did anything wrong. Maybe someone was pounding on his door & he had to go take care of something. Don't jump to conclusions too soon, and don't try to contact him again (it would seem needy).

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 9 (view)

How would you approach someone on here that you have a professional relationship with? Posted: 8/26/2009 11:20:23 AM
I think just by messaging him, you were putting it out there. What did he say when he responded?

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 172 (view)

For a Laugh- What movie would you base your life on as of now? Posted: 8/21/2009 3:08:50 PM
He's just not that into you...lol But only certain parts. Haaa ha ha... that I can relate to. I'm not sure about my movie yet though, I've gotta dig deep and think about this one- great question though!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 4 (view)

Is it really that odd to not have a pet? Posted: 8/21/2009 3:05:27 PM
lol... maybe it's who you're emailing OP. I've never had that problem but I guess if you're attracted to future "cat ladies" then perhaps...

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 45 (view)

Reconciliation advice Posted: 8/20/2009 11:12:51 AM
A tooth ache... ha ha... don't make me laugh, my stomach hurts. This woman is feeding you some kinda bullsh*t. Have you heard the saying, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."? I think the "fool me twice" is in effect here.

IntrigueMe66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

Lust Lost... Posted: 8/19/2009 7:13:58 PM
Good question... a cuple of them maybe. Some, I can't help but think to myself "wtf was I thinking?" I think the difference is how it ended. If it ended well then I'm still attracted to them. If it ended bad and I wound up hating their guts then I'm not.

IntrigueMe66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

So embarrased! Posted: 8/19/2009 7:01:47 PM
Ahhh ha ha ha ha..... haaaaaaaaaaa ha ha ha ha.... Oh my, I hope some day you look back at this and laugh, because holy heck I am!! I guess it COULD happen to anybody really... but thank god it wasn't me! Sorry!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 195 (view)

Sexless marriages/relationships.....go figure? Posted: 8/19/2009 4:04:53 PM
If you found yourself to be in this type of relationship , would you consider it grounds for leaving? Secondly if you do not agree that it is a reason to leave, how do you live in a sexless relationship???? Do you not feel that some level of intimacy is necessary to keep a couple bonded together??? Q1) No, I don't consider that grounds for leaving. If I'm married then I made a committment, so I'd try to find a way to fix it. Q2) Yes, I do believe intimacy is needed... but just because there is no intimacy doesn't mean there CAN'T be. Both parties have to make the effort to put that spark back into the relationship. I've never been married but I do know that I'm not going to go into it thinking that after a while of being together things are going to get boring and I'm going to leave. You gotta try, or why did you get married in the first place? It's too easy to quit these days, effort is almost unheard of.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 29 (view)

Reconciliation advice Posted: 8/19/2009 3:59:13 PM
She has told me that she has plans tonight but hopes to meet up with me later, we'll see how that goes. Right. So she's going to go out on the town and if she doesn't find anyone else to take home, you'll do. OP- Several times you've said that you know you can make this work again. Who are you trying to convince... us, or yourself? I think deep down you know you need to just let it go (at least for now).

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 27 (view)

Reconciliation advice Posted: 8/19/2009 3:48:09 PM
Tell her to make a choice. She's in, or she's out. She has to either commit to trying to make things work with you (slowly if she wants) or she can choose to keep dating other people... but she can't mix the two. If she's not prepared to make that decision then maybe you need to take some time apart so you can both figure out what you want.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

When Exs Contact You Out Of The Blue.. Posted: 8/19/2009 3:39:17 PM
Provided he wasn't a jerk about it and it was a nice clean cut... I'd probably tell him we could remain "aquaintences" not so much friends. I, like you, would have to keep my distance... but I probably wouldn't block/delete him unless he'd been cruel or he started playing games (I want you/I don't want you/I want you/I don't want you).

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 27 (view)

Remove XXXXX from my matches - ever notice this feature before? Posted: 8/17/2009 3:00:49 PM
In all my history on POF... I have never actually reviewed my matches. It's not like we do in depth personality profiles, so how does POF know who I'd match up well with?

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 50 (view)

Thats not My job it's His and vice versa Posted: 8/17/2009 2:51:32 PM
I think the ladies here are talking about the "historically" mans and women’s jobs. I don't think that they are limiting their selves by saying that. And I don't think that it is wrong to want to be a bit traditional. Some women like to feel protected by their man. Some don't need that. It is all a matter of personal preference. I like women that are independent, but also a bit traditional. I personally like to take care of certain things around the house that are sometimes called Men's work. I also like to hold doors open, pull chairs out, and stand when a woman enters the room. I don't think that is me limiting a woman in anyway. That is just my show of respect, and the way that I was raised by my mother and father. Thank you, well said!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 49 (view)

Thats not My job it's His and vice versa Posted: 8/17/2009 2:48:29 PM
WTF is a 'man's man' and what the hell are 'womanly duties'. Hang on while I check the calendar... Nope, it's not 1950. I'm stunned by how women think this attitude is OK. By assigning such narrow gender roles you are giving up any real power and independence for being manipulative and limiting yourself to roles that don't fit in today's world. Earn money, get Mr Lube to change oil, don't be dependent on someone else to accomplish things you need done thereby keeping your autonomy and not having to nag someone so your car runs properly. Seems pretty simple. Wow, I'm so glad to see that all of your forty-some years have resulted in such an ignorant and assuming attitude. Bravo, Bravo!! I by no means have "narrow gender roles" or limit myself in any way. As a matter of fact I have a sucessful career, my own condo, and my own car. I pay my own bills, and I can even check the oil in my car by myself if you can believe it If you read my post you'll see that I didn't say that more masculine duties BELONGED to a man or that I was not CAPABLE, I simply stated that I typically am attracted to the "man's man", the kind of guy who would and is capable of doing those things. The kind of gentleman who wants the kind of woman who's willing to cook his dinner, rub his back, and keep his home tidy. Believing in traditional gender roles by no means limits me from being my own individual. It just means that while my man is putting together our new furniture, I'm going to make him a darn casarole. If you're going to respond to forums maybe you should pull your head out of your butt. You don't have to agree with me but someone your age should have a more mature and respectable attitude. Peace Out

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 46 (view)

Thats not My job it's His and vice versa Posted: 8/17/2009 9:11:15 AM
Yeah, I agree with you OP... I like a man's man who'll change my oil and fix the leaky faucet. But that goes both ways... while I appreciate a man who can/will do that, I have no problem doing the more womanly duties like cooking and cleaning. So long as it even's out :)

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

Is the recession hurting your dating choices????????????? Posted: 8/17/2009 9:07:36 AM
I'm certainly being much more careful with my money in all aspects but I don't think it's really affected my dating life much.

IntrigueMe66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 167 (view)

Must the goal be 24/7 in a committed relationship? Posted: 8/13/2009 3:39:05 PM
I for one have no intentions of ever living with another man UNTIL I am at least engaged to him. I've done it before, and I did it too quickly. Next time I'm going to make sure I want to spend the rest of my life with someone and vise versa before I put myself into a situation where I am sharing assets such as a home (renting OR owning regardless). That said, a lot of times guys think "she's already living with me so what's the point in marrying her?" and marriage is important to me, so I won't give that up until I've got a serious commitment.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 61 (view)

The Dangers of Faceboof!!! Posted: 8/12/2009 12:26:14 PM
He has no intentions of ever being exclusive with you... sorry to be the bearer of bad news!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 51 (view)

Does your ex still calls you? Posted: 8/12/2009 11:57:11 AM
They're not interested in you... they're interested in WHY you're not paying any attention to THEM. She's probably missing the attention.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 260 (view)

What is your biggest obstacle to committing to a relationship? Posted: 8/12/2009 11:46:59 AM
In my opinion, there are two major obstacles to committing to a relationship. The first is the difficulty in finding someone deeply compatible. Yep, that is definately an obstacle for those of us who are looking for THE one and not ANY one. The second is that there are so many terrific women available, it's difficult to isolate oneself from them all. BULLSH*T!! If you've found "the one" then you would have no problem giving up the dating world to be with them... and if you can't, then you're not ready for "the one" in the first place. Personally my biggest obstacle is compatibility... finding someone I can relax and be 100% myself around without worrying I'm going to peeve them off of freak them out. I'm opinionated and stubborn and I know what I deserve and expect... I need a guy who can take it, and give it back.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

if someone scared you by seeming too eager. . . Posted: 8/12/2009 11:41:34 AM
I think that you are freaking out over nothing. People get eager when they start dating someone who they really like. It's a chemical thing, you get excited... that's the lusty stage and it always tapers off after a bit. There's nothing scary about it, take it as a compliment, continue living your life and dating this person and behaving like you normally would... but let yourself get a little excited too, there's nothing wrong with it!!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 31 (view)

My girl got pregnant, she dumped me? is this normal? need some advices..thanks Posted: 8/12/2009 11:32:11 AM
Maybe she's just decided that now she's going to be a Mother who needs to take her life more seriously, and maybe she doesn't see you as being a part of that life long-term. It could be anything, but pestering her won't help your case any... leave her be.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

Can I not get over the past, or is there really something there? Posted: 8/12/2009 11:30:18 AM
She's your wife, you made a committment and you should work it out. But you have to remember that 9 months is not really "the past". That is still something you're dealing with emotionally and will be for quite some time. You just have to find a way to make the relationship work now and only time will heal the hurt you feel over her cheating.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 90 (view)

I think I get it. Posted: 8/12/2009 9:05:03 AM
I think you're right when it comes to more serious relationships and commitments... it is certainly too easy and socially acceptable to give up these days, but as for those people who are dating around and/or in the beginning stages of relationships, I think if it's going bad so early on then that's a huge red flag that you weren't meant to be together. I think people need to take more time searching for THE one and not just ANY one and then focus on that relationship and making it work. That said I do have two deal breakers for any relationship and it would have to be some kinda circumstances to make me break these rules. I leave if he: a) hits me, or b) cheats on me.

IntrigueMe66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

The infamous disappearing guy act Posted: 8/11/2009 7:00:17 PM
Ohhh this happens all the time. Did you start initiating contact more often than you had in the start? All I can say is that guys like to chase so sometimes when you start doing a bit of the chasing (usually without realizing it for us women), men lose interest. If that's not the case, there's a million other reasons... maybe he met someone, maybe he wasn't super interested and changed his mind... who knows. If I were you, I'd call him on it and tell him his decision is fine but you deserve an explanation. I'm kind of a **** like that though, lol.

IntrigueMe66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 149 (view)

men outnumber women on dating sites Fact? or Myth? Posted: 8/10/2009 9:31:45 PM
I don't know if there's more men than women or if women are just more reluctant to initiate messages... but the ratio of initial emails is definitely a lot more favorable for the ladies, so I've been told by several friends of both sexes.

IntrigueMe66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 30 (view)

how long would you wait Posted: 8/10/2009 8:27:45 PM
Long enough for her to take a couple deep breaths. Then call her back and be calm yourself! lol... such silliness.

IntrigueMe66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 1355 (view)

Is Intelligence A Curse In Relationships? Posted: 8/10/2009 7:55:29 PM
Are you confusing intellectual with common sense and self worth? Because in that case... maybe they are just not settling for someone who doesn't deserve them. I don't think any intellectual woman is going to avoid an equally or even more intellectual man... I speak for myself when I say that I want someone who is on my level... and that's not just with smarts. I mean common sense, maturity, etc.

IntrigueMe66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 49 (view)

Cyber cheating Posted: 8/10/2009 7:44:59 PM
I was engaged to a guy who did and said the same things over and over. Our relationship was good otherwise so I forgave but it never got any better because he didn't care to fix it despite the things he said. He's not worth your time. Unfortunately these lessons are often learned the hard way. You are better than this. Move on girl, and you'll be relieved when you do, TRUST ME!!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

We just met online and ready to have sex Posted: 8/10/2009 12:31:56 PM
Uhhh... smack! That was me reaching through my computer screen to knock some sense into you, OP. Try following the 4 date rule. It's not perfect, but it's a start.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 1176 (view)

If someone emails you with misspelled words and bad grammar, do you respond? Posted: 8/10/2009 12:28:14 PM
I don't expect perfection but some emails aren't even readable. I figure if he can't take the time to use proper punctuation and hit spell check then I shouldn't take the time to decode it.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 32 (view)

change of thought about mens pictures Posted: 8/10/2009 12:25:49 PM
I think I agree with you OP. If a man's car is what makes him happy and what he's passionate about then that's what should be in his pictures (plus him I hope). The only thing I don't like is when men have all these pictures with random (and drop dead gorgeous) girls in them. It's like they're putting them up in hopes you'll think he's super-catch or something. Unless it's your sister, I don't care!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 42 (view)

How long will you use online dating? Posted: 8/10/2009 12:21:43 PM
I'm an on again, off again online dater. I get sick of dating in general sometimes but as for online- I've concluded that this is the 21st century and this is how it's done.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 12 (view)

Should I go out with a guy 16 years younger? Posted: 8/10/2009 12:18:11 PM
Uhh... I think you're too old for him but that's JMO. Better yet, I think he's too young for you. The chances are slim your lives would be compatible and this would be more than a good boink... but I guess it all depends what you're looking for.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 26 (view)

Is it right to ask a girl to put their life on hold for you? Posted: 8/10/2009 12:09:54 PM
I guess that depends on how long you've been together for and if you're willing to provide her with a serious commitment before or afterwards. If you don't see this relationship going long term, then don't waste her time. If you do, and she feels the same, then I'm sure she'll wait but you need to make the committment clear.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 168 (view)

Should men pay half of the expense of women's birth control? Posted: 8/10/2009 12:05:43 PM
Well okay, technically it should be half his responsibility but I'd like to think that if I were in a serious monogomous relationship that the financial aspect of it would balance out in other areas. Maybe he always brings home the milk. Kind of silly to get wrapped up in such a little detail, no?

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

Sleeping Styles Posted: 8/10/2009 11:56:37 AM
On my stomach, clutching my pillow, one leg angled out, corner to corner on the bed... lol. I can't sleep on my back either, and I can't sleep snuggling either. I can snuggle before bed, but when I'm trying to fall asleep I feel claustrophobic.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 6 (view)

Bachelor parties...Do you have a problem with them. Posted: 8/10/2009 11:35:44 AM
Well first of all, a bachelor party doesn't have to mean strippers. Sometimes it's a guy's weekend of fishing or golfing or whatever else, that depends on the kind of guy. Even if it is a wild party with strippers, I would expect my man to know where the line between fun and cheating is- so who cares? I would rather know I was marrying someone I could trust than someone I am questioning enough to not let him go to a party with his buddies. Besides, I have my girlfriends bachelorette parties and I have no intentions of giving those up. Perhaps it's the perfect oppourtunity to really test that trust.

IntrigueMe66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 92 (view)

How much should a man chase you to show he is interested? Posted: 8/9/2009 12:23:16 AM
I completely agree with the OP's quote. If a man likes you that much, he will knock down buildings to get to you... if he thinks you're worth the effort, he'll do it. JMO though!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 206 (view)

Do women cook anymore?? Posted: 8/7/2009 3:35:45 PM
Just an observation, but so many people on this site are so bitter or negative towards the opposite sex. What the heck are you doing on a dating site?? Some people have some serious baggage they need to put to rest before they should be adding another to their life. Just sayin'!

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 44 (view)

Styles of Beauty Posted: 8/7/2009 3:17:08 PM
Wow what a great idea for a post!! These forums are so doom and gloom and it's great that somebody is trying to get us to all think about what makes us beautiful. I appreciate that! It's too bad some of these posts aren't taking it seriously, but whatever... I'm game!! Physically: I love my green eyes. I think they sparkle and they're rare. I love the freckles and markings and cheek bones that I inherited from my German Grandmother. She was a model and I'm lucky to have stolen at least a couple good features! Personality: I think I'm pretty funny sometimes. I'm opinionated and I have a strong personality, but I'm also polite and respectful.

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 429 (view)

How important is chivalry in an relationship to you? Posted: 8/7/2009 2:56:01 PM
OP- Chivalry is very important to me. I consider myself to be fairly traditional and I like a man who is a gentleman. Unfortunately, there's not a lot of them left around here...

intrigueme66

Joined: 8/8/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

what would you rather have, peace or passion? Posted: 8/7/2009 2:08:32 PM
I'm getting to the point where I would much rather have a relationship that was calm and peaceful in the main with a moderate amount of passion, rather than a intensely passionate one that was stormy as a rule. You all? Peace... as long as I'm happy :) Passion is important but it only gets you so far.

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