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nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 111 (view)

What does Don't want kids really mean ? Posted: 1/22/2009 12:40:54 PM
that is called: selective READING and not understanding perfectly plain english!

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 86 (view)

Would you actually fill one out? Posted: 1/15/2009 2:16:29 PM
OP: well, isnt the initial contact sort of an application? You ask some of the pertinent questions and hope for the real honest answer. Also, the first meeting...seems sort of like that job interview when you size each other up and see about getting MORE things in your mind answered. But an actual application? oh HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL no. I do enough paperwork at work ! But, heres a few lingering questions you may consider on that verbal interview: Is the TP hung w. the next peice DOWN or up and when was the last time you actually put a roll ON the dispenser? (being told to doesnt count) Do the dirty sox belong : a, under the bed ; b, ON the bed ; c, on your ol sweaty stinkin feet until they crawl off on their own and head for the garbage bin??? How adept are you at building a beer can pyramid? Do you squeeze the toothpaste from the middle, the bottom or just smash it down with your palm and catch whatever doesnt go down the drain, on the toothbrush? Now see, THESE are really the burning questions. lol Happy fishing.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 30 (view)

First Meeting Place Posted: 1/13/2009 1:36:37 AM
PERV alert ! With all the nuts all over, one has to be very careful where they go and are by themselves. Im thinking if hes that adamant on it being HIS place (much less YOURS) he has some major control issues. Anyone that insists on THAT, should only spend time with their laundry instead of people. Come on, you listen to the news....you arent a wide-eyed easily tricked teenager anymore, why would you even want to HEAR from this nutjob anymore? Move on and find someone that respects you . Anyone that would question meeting in PUBLIC for the first time, is just wayyyyyy too off the center line to even consider in my book.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Passing on a legacy Posted: 1/2/2009 10:34:44 AM
with any luck, the legacy will be simple: live an honorable life. we have all made mistakes in life and we all have to own up to them and move forward. doing what is right, just BECAUSE its right, in spite of whatever others think or say, to me is legacy enough.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 26 (view)

Haven't dated in a good 30+ years Posted: 1/2/2009 10:24:32 AM
Nope, you are doing what is right for YOU and stick with it. If you have to explain the obvious to anyone, really....is it worth persuing at all? Dont let anyone try to change your mind on things that matter to YOU, it matters for your reasons and that should be enough. good luck !

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 43 (view)

Marriage after 45 Posted: 1/2/2009 10:17:46 AM
I would love to marry again, but first theres all that pesky dating involved. Now, if sometime this year the MARRIAGE PARTNER SUPER STORE opens here, I' ll be sure to be one of the first in line to shop. Things have changed and gotten so complicated anymore, its really hard to even think about the whole dating thing for some of us. So many players, so little patience for the BS they bring with em. It used to be simpler but I guess we all gotta go with the present ....so for now, I ll stick to working and reading forums. Good luck to all of you brave enough to get OUT there though.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 22 (view)

did he try to rob me? Posted: 12/27/2008 7:46:36 AM
not a guy here, but i have a simple rule on ANYTHING: when in doubt , DONT . so, with this guy apparently theres doubt...thats your little voice tellin ya to RUN, listen to it. could be nothing, could be a fetish for your leather purse, could be a nutcase trying to do whatever .....again, when in doubt, DONT. and as for asking him, if hes up to no good hes just gonna lie anyway. if it was in the way of the tv, he surely would have SAID so then, duh. just my two cents.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

moonchild Posted: 12/15/2008 4:51:53 AM
OP, rethink your wording a bit. If you find you are being misunderstood alot that could be part of the reason. A single parent is way different than one who shares custody also. Shared parenting is great, but you also have to realize the next SO for you would be a part of that sharing in responsibility, discipline, etc. and you should ask yourself exactly what part that would BE. Its unfair to expect anyone to come into your childrens lives as a part of YOURS and not have a say in what happens under your roof (assuming of course it becomes that serious). I personally am done raising kids and now enjoy the spoiling of my grandsons and sending them home saying 'but GRANDMA lets me do it' lol. I wouldnt want to date anyone that had kids at home, whether they were very young or in their teens....both ages bring a whole different perspective to the relationship and not ALL kids are open to the SO as you may hope. That being said, when you contact a prospective date, let her know that you have shared custody or whatever the situation is, and go from there. Being totally upfront about it is the best way to go and you dont have to go into much detail immediately. good luck.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 25 (view)

Has society really changed that much? Posted: 12/14/2008 3:43:41 PM
How long a list would you like? we respected our PARENTS , and if we even thought the words 'shut up ' toward them we were SURE they heard it anyway; we had more responsibility for OUR actions and knew there were consequences to be paid if we didnt do what we should be doing in school or at home; we actually dated and had great times OUT with friends, not just as couples; and the list can go on and on. However, the times then werent full of shot by shot live pictures of War, riots and political garbage. We were in a more innocent time because for the most part we WERE more innocent then...we were too busy playing and having a good time to know there was a world going on out THERE. Our parents listened to the news, but we just thought it was background noise. I think too, we respected OURSELVES more back then. Im not sure its a longing for the good ol days, but I sure would like to see some of it come back.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 115 (view)

Is dressing for comfort instead of style and fashion really a crime? Posted: 12/13/2008 4:25:13 PM
Julia, if thats all it takes to stay single...Im rite there TOO. GONE are the heels, dresses /suits and huge drycleaning bills for all that stuff. I can still clean up when I have to...but you know...at 57, I dont think I 'have to' do very much of anything anymore. Take me, ya take me in my jeans and tshirts !

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 8 (view)

why do women behave like this... Posted: 12/11/2008 3:30:20 PM
OP: its not women, its just HER and the situation. You have a lawyer, let lawyers do the correspondence as to finances, custody, visitation,etc. That keeps things on a civil level, until you are both at the rational emotional level you will eventually reach....much after the divorce is final. Whether you were married years or weeks, if the emotions are THERE for one of you and not the other, its always going to be difficult to remain amiable in the beginning. Good luck.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 4 (view)

Relationship with someone who is disabled? Posted: 12/11/2008 2:57:38 PM
I think we all have our preferences on a lot of levels, and some seem to think finances and physical abilities /attributes are THAT important. Go with works for YOU and make no explanations or apologies because you are an adult and have that CHOICE. I like to hope I would make long term decisions on a whole LOT of factors about the other person...because if Im thinking long term, we already have a lot in common or wouldnt be 'dating' in the first place. As you get to know anyone, you get to know more of what you can or cant live with....that goes for EVERYTHING, not just looks, physical abilities or income. and Sapphire....girl, you do what you gotta do to take YOU where you want to be in your future. the small hurdles we go thru in life, to take us to the next level are only seen as OBSTACLES if we allow them to stop us.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 55 (view)

If an individual is a hoarder, can they romantically attach to someone? Posted: 12/10/2008 7:30:15 AM
OP: the short answer is NO! when my neighbor died, and his house was 'cleaned'....it took 2 weeks and a contstruction dump trailer to hold all the junk he had amassed over the years. i cant begin to describe the stench that house had, even after it was empty for months! the new owners bought it for a song because the floors and interior walls / ceilings had to be ripped out and replaced, due to the mold all over everything. there was rotting food in EVERY room of the house, stacks of books molded together from years of just being kept in closed up rooms and we wont even get into what the bathroom held. to ME, hoarding is a sign of way deeper problems than the mere collecting of things. im not sure WHAT its a sign of, but it screams to me that i certainly dont need to be involved in it. i personally am a 'pitcher'....if you dont use it or wear it in a year, you dont NEED it....so off to charity it goes. living in a very small house too, has the one advantage for ME in that it prevents over collecting of useless stuff. maybe as i get older, i need less, i dont know.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

Is owning a home a positive or negative? Posted: 12/10/2008 7:03:38 AM
OP: I wasnt raised to brag on what possessions we had, just to accept the responsibility for maintaining them as best we could. For me, its not a matter of where anyone ELSE lives that matters because a tent could be their perfect place .....or a mansion....for THEM. I am perfectly content in the place I live, and would hope that I wouldnt have to 'sell' myself with a list of possessions to anyone. But...obviously I dont know much about it since I havent dated in ages. I do agree that it COULD be seen as stability, but then appearences arent always what we perceive them to be. Guess ya just have to take a shot in the dark sometimes and hope for the best.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT A TEXT MESSAGE BREAK-UP? Posted: 12/9/2008 1:20:53 PM
old 'sex in the city' episode OP.....

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 145 (view)

Sex on the first meeting? Posted: 12/4/2008 11:44:48 AM
Romantic Optimist: there was NO condom used, there was NO protection even given a thought. As for judgments...sorry it sounds that way, it wasnt one. But, I am highly disappointed in my friend for having such a lack of judgement. Funny, you think you KNOW someone...and blam, they surprise ya every time. Oh well, we are friends...his life is his life and HIS problem when the playing turns to paying. Guess I just dont get it, maybe because I wasnt raised to think so little of myself, that immediate sex was the way to get a date, attention or whatever. But hey, we ARE all adults here....if that floats yer boat.....I guess you go with it.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 21 (view)

What makes kids think they're welcome into their 20's and 30's? Posted: 12/3/2008 2:52:00 PM
Red, wow...you did well by your children...you actually inspired them to be contributing members of society. So, where do we sign up all the others that cant seem to do it.....do you offer classes on weekends or what? lol Really though...KUDOS!

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

What makes kids think they're welcome into their 20's and 30's? Posted: 12/3/2008 2:49:42 PM
Im sorry...I dont see this as a problem IF you raised the kids to become responsible ADULTS. There is a time for them to be kids, and a time for them to be adults. Unless there is a major health issue where the 'no longer a teenager' cant WORK, they SHOULD work and pay rent when they move 'back home'. If they bring their kids and spouse with them, its still THEIR family to make sure is provided for....so that means a roof over the heads becomes THEIR responsibility no matter WHOS ROOF IT IS. Same for food on the table. The last time I looked, grocery stores werent giving away free baskets of food to the PARENTS, so they could feed the 'moved back home' generation.....someone has to BUY it, ergo...someone has to EARN it. If you have the energy to party all nite, or the money for toys , cars and dates...you have the OBLIGATION FIRST to pay rent, buy FOOD, contribute to the expense of the household and WORK to get your position in life BETTER. (Savings is a foreign concept to many nowadays though, not just the kids that are moving back home.) The whiney brats that are led to believe we OWE them a perfect life, are the ones that move back and do nothing productive towards ever leaving. In my past, there were very hard times but NEVER did I expect my parents to support me or house me! If I couldnt afford the fancy apt, car or clothes, either I made DO with what I had or found more WORK to pay for it. Call it tough love or whatever you like...it was just NOT an option I ever gave MYSELF. just my two or three cents worth.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 142 (view)

Sex on the first meeting? Posted: 12/3/2008 1:25:28 PM
I thought there would be a thread on this already, and dammmmmmmm its an oldy. Just talked w a guy friend of mine (friend, NOT fwb, just a friend who lives in another state and we have talked for years on here and actually MET.) and began to wonder if perhaps my thinking is just sooo old that theres no hope in hell of ever having a date much less a relationship again. He recently met a woman online, talked for about 2 wks (emails and phone calls), and finally took the drive to see her. He spent the nite, and left the next morning. He tells me there was 'no connection whatsoever because the deal breakers were too many to overlook'. However, in the next breath...he says 'of COURSE we had sex'. Call me stupid here, but if theres that many deal breakers flashing the red lights, why would a person even THINK to have sex with a virtual stranger? Am I stupid in thinking that if they jump into bed that quick with YOU, they did with who knows how many others...and what did the others 'leave behind'???? And, even if there are no red flags all over....to just have sex with a stranger? Does the fact you had dinner first make you suddenly THAT trustworthy? Maybe its new morality for the over 50 crowd, maybe its just thinking with the little brain. I am sure that thats too dangerous anymore (forget the fact they could be total weirdos that could hack you up while you snooze, that in itself is reason NOT to just have at it) to just bed hop with or without condoms. Im never going to be convinced a teeny tiny slim film of rubber no matter what it has IN it, on it or whatever the box claims...will protect you from Aids or whatever the latest 'unwanted gift' is. I asked him if he even gave a thought to all that....and his response: 'Sure, but the idea of going without for an unknown time is worse than the risks' . Am I just thinking too old fashioned or what? Really, is this all THAT common ? (keep in mind...i do NOT think its unusual for the younger people, their morals are all screwy anyway. im talking about the over 50 set.....they are BOTH late 50's!!! as am i.)

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

I need some advice! Posted: 11/29/2008 1:24:57 PM
You 'met' her or you are having a lot of back and forth IM/email? If you actually MET....and she hasnt gotten in touch with you, drop a line saying 'hello' at least and see if there was a spark/connection or not. She MAY be waiting to hear from YOU ya know, and might not want to seem pushy to contact you. If you are just exchanging email/IM, take that great leap of faith and ask her to actually MEET YOU somewhere non threatening for a quick coffee or perhaps a lunch. Either way...take that step....ASK. The worse that can happen? Shes not interested....but.........WHAT IF SHE IS??????? then, shower up real nice, put on that great new shirt you bought just in case you met THE one, and go have the coffee or lunch. Talk about whatever you like, just be a gentleman above all else. See how that goes....and if you are still interested...ask her for a REAL DATE ! just my two cents

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 36 (view)

Shared Housing With Man Sharing - Would it be an option? Posted: 11/29/2008 12:30:03 PM
starstuff: i too am one thats more comfortable w. the guys than a bunch of women ....we share a lot of the same interests (but i will NOT share MY TOOLS) and theres noooooooo hassles when its on a friendly level. as for the 'shared housing' arrangement: count me OUT. i have my own little house, and i plan on keeping it (or another one thats all MINE, if i ever decide to sell). communal living/sharing space/dorm type setting....all not me! the aggravation of so many varied personalities, under ONE roof is enough to make me want to bang my head into wall on a daily basis. give me ONE good fella, thats got eyes ONLY FOR ME, and im a happy lil camper. i dont share the dipstick EITHER, and omg....how could anyone actually DO that? bless all them poor confused commune women that do that...for religion or whatever they are callin it....to me, its just NOT MY BAG. in my opinion, that usually only works for the guy (as has been pointed out several times) but sooooooo not for the women. i share my house currently with 4 legged, hairy, cute little faces that do NOT drink, argue or tell me i gotta stop smoking . until that ONE great guy comes along, thats gonna be enough for this ol girl. also, the dorm type deal, with private baths etc, at some point you are living under someone ELSE's rules....sorry, i am old enough to live by my OWN rules and that works just FINE for me.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

How did you help destroy prior relationships and what has it taught you? Posted: 11/25/2008 1:56:31 PM
The way I 'destroyed' my past relationships was by trusting TOO much, and not hearing that voice in my head that SCREAMED 'something aint rite here'. Actually, that was the last relationship...20 yrs worth. I wont make that mistake again though, I have learned that that little voice KNOWS what my heart is avoiding hearing or seeing. I have to say though, that perhaps in being so trusting, I also learned how to become a better listener...to all things, not just what is said (because a lot of what goes UNsaid speaks volumes). I have learned a lot about me in the 8 yrs alone now, and Im actually glad he was the lying rat he eventually showed himself to BE...if not for that, I would have gone blindly along for who knows how much more and ended up with a lot less of ME to climb out of that hole he dug. I have to admit though, one doesnt dig you IN unless you allow yourself to be covered in dirt at some point....wont make that mistake again. I am optimistic though, even if it doesnt sound like it. I know there are great men out there, who are honest to a fault and would no sooner lie about what they do, or who with, than they would slap their own mothers. I hold out hope to find that ONE thats searching for me too.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 12 (view)

Something is not quite kosher, does this sound weird Posted: 11/24/2008 3:17:40 PM
op: when in doubt, listen to the little voice thats screaming GET OUT! if you are feeling overly generous with this nut, call him when his phone IS on and tell him youd like to see him on another nite...and see where or IF that happens. im so sure you ll get excuses...oh well if so, question ANSWERED loud and clear! and yes, the answer is he has someone else or several other someones. your call though, if it was mine id be outta this weirdness. take the holiday to enjoy othe peoples company or just enjoy a nice peaceful dinner alone. then, start looking for a truly HONEST man. (sorry, drunk mama or not...this all is just toooooo weird)

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 48 (view)

Marijuna and relationships Posted: 11/24/2008 11:38:34 AM
for ME, they can have drugs or me. (illegal drugs or the use of prescription ones that are NOT being used for what they are generally prescribed FOR of course). i work way to hard to keep all i have and stay off of the bill collectors 'must call' list. i smoked all my pot in high school, back in 69 when we thought that was the cool thing. im way past all that crap now and just dont get why ANYONE over the age of 18 even wants to take the chance on being caught with illegal substances. i dont know about you, but i LIKE taking a shower alone and in PRIVATE.....not out there for everyone in a cell to see and join in. call me stupid, but if it aint legal, dont bring it around me and please stay AWAY from me.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 46 (view)

Divorce vs Separation after 50 Posted: 11/24/2008 11:29:13 AM
OP: all i can say is GOOD LUCK in whatever avenue that YOU chose and may you be guided by the Lord and your Heart and Head, because they all work together. i cant even imagine being in the place in life you find yourself today. no judgments here, because we ALL live and hopefully LEARN as we plod along in this life we are given. some of us do everything right and it goes perfectly, some of us do what is right and it all goes to hell in a handbasket and the rest of us just make TODAY work the best way we know how and try not to do a lot of damage to anyone in the process. it does not surprise me that Legal Aid turned you down for assistance....what surprises me is how many places CAN help you and dont for whatever silly reason they have THAT day. you hang in there....look in your heart and listen to your head about what is the right thing for YOU.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 33 (view)

Divorce vs Separation after 50 Posted: 11/22/2008 3:08:53 PM
yes i READ....and i can read between the lines as well. seems like this isnt so much a marriage now as in inconvenience. oh well, good luck in whatever avenue you persue. as for shopping for answers at an attorneys office, why dont you set up an appointment with the Bar Association in your state, and have THEM tell you the answers to YOUR questions. lawyers, like a doctor, only answer what you ask and then THEY tell you what they think they heard from YOU. go in prepared....really prepared...have a list of actual questions you want answered. walk in, say hello...my name is Mrs IWantToKnowMyRights and i have a list of questions i would very much like specific answers to, can YOU do that for me TODAY? and heres another idea that will keep you from being confused: take a tape recorder with you. lay it rite out there on the desk...and tell them you want to record everything because you are NOT an attorney and want to be sure you fully understand what you are told, not just what you think you may have heard. (there is a HUGE difference when you can listen to the answers at HOME, when you are not rushed for time and arent in the presence of someone that can be intimidating just by their appearnce). if its an attorney worth his fee,he or SHE , will not have a problem with that. also, try going to Legal Aid...if not for the actual estate planning or whatever you finally decide to DO, for some answers as well. they do civil work as well as criminal and will be happy to get you pointed in the right direction. one more thing.....just because you have an appointment WITH an attorney, does not mean the attorney is who you SEE. you may be talking with the paralegal for that office and not realize it.....ASK before you even ask the first question: are YOU the attorney or the paralegal? you do not have to have an attorney in many states to either file for divorce or seperation or whatever it is you actually want done. attorneys know the law...they can advise you HOW to file your own paperwork (as can the people in the courthouse and they DO that on a daily basis, for FREE because your taxes pay THEIR salary), but a lawyer wont always tell you they CAN act as your legal advisor ONLY and not as the attorney on record. (again, a huge difference). check with your state bar association and ask them if you can do that in your state. again...good luck. the choice between a rock and a hard place is sometimes if we thought ahead and brought a pillow.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 29 (view)

Divorce vs Separation after 50 Posted: 11/22/2008 9:13:18 AM
seperated, whether in seperate rooms of the house or a different state/country...means STILL married. im sure you will find men that want to just date, no committments from either side and if you do....have a great time. for me though, DIVORCED means they are ready to move on with their lives and hopefully want to make the next time, the LAST time. but...what do i know.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 100 (view)

What's wrong with sex before marriage? Posted: 11/22/2008 9:04:12 AM
nothing...if you want to go that way, GO...enjoy and start your doctor on a permanent retainer.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 122 (view)

I Want To Leave... Posted: 11/18/2008 6:02:34 PM
so....LEAVE ! unless both legs dont work, you have NO phone to call a friend or a cab, and are locked in a room with no windows...i dont see why you cant just GO. if your pregnant...decide with YOUR family (who you obvioiusly left too soon to have learned any responsibility or common sense from) what to do about the baby and IF you decide to have it...and if HE wants to be involved, go thru the legal processes necessary to insure the CHILD has a decent beginning. if HE doesnt want to be involved...get a job, make daycare arrangements and enter the real world of being a single parent. geez girl, i had to check your profile to make sure you werent 12yrs old.....because thats about the age your post suggests you are living in. grow up already and stop playing house!

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 58 (view)

Can you believe this? Posted: 11/16/2008 4:52:08 PM
and yet....people think im strange because i DONT have any of these dam games! whats worse....it sure must have been a slooooooooooooooooooow newsday wherever these nuts live, for THAT to have made an article. maybe weirdness pays off in noteriety if only as filler for the home town gazette!

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

You want honesty? Posted: 11/15/2008 3:09:45 PM
Ceij...wait a second...you can have sex during time outs? really? guess theres something to be said for quickies. and i thought half time as when the beer and wings were THE important thing, but sex then too? geez, who knew. im glad i have my ol woman decoder ring here.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 273 (view)

When someone points out that you're old.. Posted: 11/15/2008 2:44:31 PM
OP: im old, im fine with it, if THEY dont like it ...too bad ya know? disprespect comes in many forms and getting in anyones face because of age, or a stated opinion...well ya know...shows no class. but...what do i know.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 17 (view)

When our goals and dreams heading into retirement create conflicts Posted: 11/13/2008 6:43:04 PM
Tally, you ask 'where do you see yourself in 5 yrs' when you THINK you want to know. If you find that spark the first time you lay eyes on each other, then its sure to be an eyeopener to what his goals are. The question I would ask myself is: where do I see me WITH this person in 5 yrs? (and no, not at the first meeting...not for several dates after either. Certainly before the relationship takes that step from friendly dating to more serious terms though) just my thinkin!

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

When our goals and dreams heading into retirement create conflicts Posted: 11/13/2008 6:36:30 PM
You are working TOWARD your dream retirement, he seems to already be there. Its your choice whether to give up the relationship and persue your dream though. I would think long and hard before changing something so important to ME, for someone else. If we cant work toward similar goals, what direction is the relationship heading in anyway? Do you really want to give up what is important to you for what someone else is happy doing (and you may NOT be so happy doing?). If you were in your 20's Id say give it time, but you arent and you have apparently planned things for YOU, for awhile now. Go for what is right for YOU. If the relationship is the right one, the compromises wont be so difficult to work out. Personally, someone wanting to change what MY longrange plans are, to fit their idea a happy future, wouldnt be a question in my mind...Id be out the door heading toward MY FUTURE. Good luck however you decide to go.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 1173 (view)

Pet Peeve of the day! Posted: 11/11/2008 2:32:50 PM
geez TNman, you just aint havin a good time at all ! PPOTD: get up early for work...dogs all snoozin so deep they dont feel me step OVER em, get HOME from work....dogs snoozin dont even heat the door OPEN....how come i have to work to buy DOGFOOD and they get to eat it and SLEEP all the time??? well, at least the cats noticed i came in, sorta.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 169 (view)

approaching women in public Posted: 11/11/2008 2:13:27 PM
OlThunder, meet Sunny...Sunny meet OlThunder...now, will you two take a plane to whereever is HALF WAY from where you live and meet already? Do i sense a connection here? Oh wait...no, this isnt Walmart or Kroger...silly me.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 128 (view)

approaching women in public Posted: 11/10/2008 5:19:31 AM
aw gee Thunder, im sorry you are taking the road of moving along and not taking a chance EVER. but, i can say i do understand. as with most of the stuff on forums, some attitudes come thru loud and clear and SCARY AS HELL. makes me kinda glad to not actually be looking anymore. (nope, havent found one, just decided to let whats gonna happen or not, happen). i do have to say though....because of my nature, i just talk to everyone anywhere, about pretty much anything. conversations is becoming a lost art and i am trying to revive it. i dont see a thing wrong in saying 'hey, do you think the driver license agent SEES us standing here for hours on end...when they just close the little window and go to lunch?' or 'oh geeez, a peice of lumber costs more than a completed house does now!' if im shopping for repair materials somewhere. to ME, it doesnt matter if its male or female nearby, if i feel the urge to speak...i DO. and no, i am NOT trying to swing both ways (get your minds outta that box will ya), its just sad that we mostly go thru life in a bubble of silence because of some fear. maybe we all gotta step back and loosen up just a tad ....try not being so paranoid everywhere we are and think that PERHAPS this person speaking to us is just trying to be friendly! for no reason other than they are friendly NOT crazy people.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 46 (view)

approaching women in public Posted: 11/6/2008 3:41:43 PM
come on now girl, get that cute SINGLE guy down the aisle, without a wedding ring on ( or the telltale sunburn ring) to get the ladder and get your stuff DOWN. and while hes up there...you get a peek at the 'view'. geeez girl...use yer brain! lol

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 45 (view)

approaching women in public Posted: 11/6/2008 3:38:22 PM
sneaky, funny...but sneaky in a not stalker crazy sort of way. can i interest anyone in using MY cell phone? lol

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 46 (view)

Dealing with the death of an Ex Posted: 10/21/2008 3:23:14 PM
Congrats tin and your new lady...may ALL your years be filled with happy memories you can tell all the grandkids one day! Sapphire, girl I just hope you know from all these posts theres a lot of us out here hoping you and your family move forward now and know you did right by the ex. I hope too, you find YOUR next fella soon.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 4 (view)

Season change and desire for companionship Posted: 10/17/2008 2:44:27 PM
Ive heard several people say the nearer Christmas or Valentines day gets...the MORE they stay away from trying to start a new relationship. Must be that ol 'gotta get flowers or candy for the little woman' thing that keeps them away. Silly me...no season is specifically a trigger for wanting to have a fella in my life, but sometimes on an especially clear nite...just the site of a full moon reinforces the fact theres no one HERE to share seeing it with. Oh well...barkin at the moon is overrated anyway!

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 88 (view)

percentage lying about age Posted: 10/15/2008 12:40:20 PM
Lying...about anything, huge turnoff. If they start with a lie, why even bother ? Guess its all in what you think is acceptable for YOU. Im 57 and dont care if its a problem for anyone...why lie about it? Of course, age isnt all that people are dishonest about with online anything....from what they do for a living (like that matters , if you work...you work! Im happy for ya! If you're retired, Im even happier for you!!) to what they look like. You have to have seen photos that were taken back somewhere around High School on profiles....I mean dam, is that not a HUGE clue?? My photo is recent and like age...why lie? Once you meet, some things are just soooooo obvious!

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

Wish you were younger? Read the other forums! Posted: 10/13/2008 3:18:32 PM
Nope, dont wish that for a second and cant remember the last time I even thought it. Im happy at 57, perhaps not all the turn of events of so many years, but none the less, content in my life TODAY, my health and hopefully wisdom. Now I can be choosey, NOW I dont have to explain a thing to anyone about anything except perhaps the grandsons; but best of all....NOW I am doing whatever I want, when I want and HOW I want. It was worth all the hippie dippie flower child days, and allllllll the rest just to get to here. Ive lived, Ive learned and Ive earned my attitude as well as the grey thats coming in....nope, cant say honestly I would want to be younger.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 50 (view)

Have a date---am nervous!! Posted: 10/13/2008 6:23:38 AM
Prof, so sorry the man lied. But hey it was worth going just to see if YOU could do it. See, now you have put that first date behind you, you have only to go UP from here on out. Every life experience brings something to the table and this one brought the lesson of dont believe all you read or hear until YOU see , hear and experience it. I love all the encouragement on here though, because it shows we are after all just people sailing the waters and ready to toss out that lifeline when its needed. Some hysterically funny stuff though...and you know laughter gets you past ANYTHING. Good luck on the next dates!

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 5 (view)

Mojo Working Posted: 10/10/2008 6:00:33 PM
OP, if you werent a lawyer in a previous life, you certainly WILL be one in the next. I had to actually read that post twice to get the gist.....maybe its because Im just duh. We mere humans rarely find that love at first sight thing, only truly lucky ones have that happen and they arent in here because they are still married. (how happy for them we all should be too). The rest of us, at any age, should just tread lightly into relationships whether it is for a day or a lifetime. Take time, learn the things that make you crazy FOR that special person, and those things that drive you crazy. Love, to me, is the unbreakable bond that begins in a whisper and grow into a roar.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 28 (view)

Oh, those Rules, Now that We're older!! Posted: 10/5/2008 4:58:43 PM
wait...rules? really? ok...i ll pretend theres rules. 1. YES, ask him out. if you wait , he may wander off and forget to ask YOU out. 2. YOU buy them if you think youre gonna need em. why take a chance that HE forgot? remember the pitter patter of those little feet? i hear these things have colors now and sizes and all sorts of little doohickeys...that should be a FUN shopping trip with the redhat ladies. 3.HIS children call you lucky , YOUR children call him SOOOO FORTUNATE 4.come on...how much do you realllly want to know that HE did before ? id think a health report would answer all the really important questions. 5.do you drink? do you like bars and the noise ? and...how easy do you get drunk? for me, coffee is fine. and, theres no pesky hangover or some strange guy in the room when i wake up after COFFEE. 6.you wear your red hat on the first date..no surprises that way. just be ready for him to wear HIS deere/redskins/GOLF hat too. 7. no, your kids wont know what you should wear unless they think its appropriate for you to wear....but your red hat friends will. at least they ll keep you covered UP for the first date. 8. if the coffee/drink went well, kiss him before you leave. why not? i dont mean body slam him onto the nearest table...although................... and NO i dont buy nuttin society shoves down on us. the questions arent pitiful, funny a little but at least you think . do what makes you feel right, have a great time and enjoy the dates.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 12 (view)

Space- HELP! Posted: 10/5/2008 12:09:58 PM
sure ron...meatloaf is the answer. foodnetwork.com helps ya know. ya silly guy ya. OP: get a life or tell him how ya feel.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

Drawing lines Posted: 10/5/2008 12:05:36 PM
RUN, far and fast and dont look back. Youve already spent way too much time with these crazies and if stick around much longer, you wont have the good sense to even THINK what goes on with brother and sister is wrong. Call me stupid here, but was the relationship with YOU or his sister? Im not real sure HE knows the answer!

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 59 (view)

why do people cheat? Posted: 10/5/2008 12:00:42 PM
Because they have NO self respect or morals, much less respect for their current partner/spouse.

nuttinfancy51

Joined: 8/15/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

Love II Posted: 10/5/2008 11:54:28 AM
You are who you are from a variety of life experiences. That said, it isnt just how our family lives were as kids...its what WE choose to do with OUR LIVES once we leave home. Some have had truly horrible marriages and are suffering scars forever from it. Some have just had bad luck with previous marriages/relationships and are not yet so disgusted with everyone ELSE in the world, that they live in a cave now, only peeking out long enough for a job or to do the grocery shopping. I believe how we were raised has some influence on how we live as independent adults though, if nothing else than to make us live the exact OPPOSITE way. I like to believe that I am still optimistic enough to want another marriage, and smart enough this time to know to be a bit pickier in my choice of a mate. Happiness comes from one's self first and then can be shared...it isnt something you actively seek out in others. Well, thats my two cents anyway.

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