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 Author Thread: Marriage - A Commitment to God or your Partner?
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Marriage - A Commitment to God or your Partner?
Posted: 9/8/2008 7:19:10 PM
One person said, "marriage is very religious, it's should be about your commitment to God and should be held in a church."

My argument was that marriage is about making a commitment to your partner. Weddings can be spiritual, but I don't believe they need to be held in a church.

So my question is - is marriage a commitment to God, or commitment to your partner?


Both!
Marriage is not about where you get married but who you are marrying. A marriage ceremony can be just as religious in any other place besides just a church. A lot of people get married in beautiful parks or their homes. The place isn't key to having God bless the marriage. The vows are the commitment you make before God and with God to your spouse. God is present everywhere, He's not just at church.

Marriage is always a commitment made between 3, the bride, the groom and God. Or at least it should be. It makes your marriage stronger and have more of a chance of NOT failing. Think of it as a rope made of twine. 3 pieces of twine wound together are going to be stronger than 2. You are making a promise not only to your spouse but to God and one is just as important as the other in a marriage. If you let your spouse down in any part of the agreement (contract) that you make on that day then you are doing the same to God. If you are unfaithful to your spouse you are unfaithful to God. It goes back to the 10 commandments. It matters how you treat others and especially how you treat your spouse and children. Once you have children you have then extended your contract even further, an addendum of sorts. Now if you fail in your commitment to your children you are once again being unfaithful to God. We get held accountable for our actions whether we like it or not. It's NOT a choice.

The last six commandments are all about how are relationships are with others. The first four are about your relationship with God. All of these fit together though and can't be separated. God even later simplifies the commandments in
Romans 13:9 (NIV)
The commandments, "Do not commit adultery," "Do not murder," "Do not steal," "Do not covet," and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: "Love your neighbor as yourself."

and again in
Galatians 5:14 (NIV)
The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself."
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
A strange fetish practiced by the elderly...
Posted: 9/4/2008 1:42:41 AM
I think it is something people have a tendency to do that are leading boring lives. They have nothing going on in their own lives so they live through others, even when it's horrible news. Some people also seem to thrive on hearing others misfortune and spreading the news. How sad is that. I think it has something to do with making them feel less bad about their own uneventful or pathetic lives and then being able to be in "the spot light" to be the person with the latest "news flash" just makes it even more of a "rush" for them. That would be the endorphins, they are basically "The Big News" junkies. I know quite a few people like that. I just try to take it in stride and make sure not to tell them anything I don't want "broadcasted" or repeated. And I try not to propagate the "News" too. Makes one appear to be a "busy body" or gossip. The bible warns against doing such things. It's not very kind. "News" should always be allowed to come straight from the person it is about. Unless there is purpose in which it is helping the person with a problem. For the most part it just isn't necessary.

Watch out for these people because sometimes the don't have all the facts or some incorrect facts. They tend to interject a little more into some of what they happen to hear and pass along twisted up stories. Remember the game "telephone wire" or "grapevine". Things can really get out of hand and people's feelings hurt and reputations ruined because of all that second hand gossip.

Another thing some people are addicted to. that has some negativity to. it is seeking out "incapable of taking care of themselves people". I know some really wonderful people but they seem to really thrive on having needy people around them to excessively be helping. I think it's another one of those "makes them feel better about themselves and their lives" kind of thing. It also makes them feel important that they have the capability to fix someone else, maybe even superior to the one in need, an ego boost. I'm sure the endorphins are playing a part in this scenario once again.

The annoyance over the food smelling I can't help you with, have no idea what that is about. Maybe just a hang-up or pet peeve. Maybe ask why it bothers her so much. Amazing what people will tell you when you ask. If you feel comfortable and are close enough in your relationship you might even want to point out how it's kind of sick to gossip bad news. Just a suggestion. Sometimes people don't realize what they are doing and how others are bothered by it until someone points it out, gently. Hope I was of help.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Ohhhhhhh... woe is me!!!
Posted: 9/4/2008 12:34:14 AM
To OP, what I do to beat the blahs:
Pray, it's always good to ask for God's help with your problems
Go for a nice walk outside
Crank up some upbeat music
Watch a comedy
Spend time doing something with my children like games or go to the park
Play with our pets
Eat healthy things like fruits and veggies
Use a full spectrum light (light therapy) for at least 15 min a day 2x a day
Take vitamins and/or supplements like 5-HTP a serotonin booster or Ginkgo Biloba
The B vitamins, calcium and zinc can help give your system a boost and help your brain
Bright colors can cheer up a person too, flowers, your clothing, etc.
Aromatherapy, Jasmine is a mood lifter, or a favorite perfume with happy memories

Hope you feel better.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 1170 (view)
 
Why do women post pictures of their breasts in thier profile?
Posted: 9/4/2008 12:01:49 AM
It's definitely advertising. And it works just look at how many people's favorites lists they are on.

Some probably do it because of :
Low self-esteem
Because they have nothing else to offer
Because of no morals and looking for sex
Ego boost
Attenti0n
To get emails
To get added to lots of favorites lists
Advertising for Porn
Selling Sex
Porn Star
Wannabe Porn Star

The guys that go for that:
Want sex
Into Porn
Low self-esteem
Ego boost
Attention, if they can manage to get her draped on their arm
No morals
Wannabe dating a Porn Star

Well have we covered everything, excluding those exposed breasts.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 76 (view)
 
whats in the trunk of your car??
Posted: 9/3/2008 11:22:36 PM
The junk in my trunk, LOL.

Well if my name was Guido is suppose it would be a tire iron and the poor idiot I loaned a wad of cash to and he didn't pay me back, along with some cement shoes.

Seriously though, that would be:
Spare Tire and essentials that go with
Spare Motor Oil
Hammer
Pliers
Badminton Rackets and Birdies
Frisbee
Dog Water Bowl
Hand Sanitizer
First Aid Kit
Bug Repellent
Sunscreen
Plastic Poncho
Some Empty Pop Cans, need to get them out next time at store
Jug of Water, not for drinking
Chips
I think that's everything.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 48 (view)
 
plenty of fish getting bad rep.
Posted: 9/3/2008 4:20:37 PM
I would imagine the POF is just like any other place, whether it be online or in real life. You have your general mix of people. People looking for: that quick hook-up, someone just to talk to, fun and companionship, dates, friendship, something more serious, someone to marry, someone to scam, and then there are your general pervs that lurk everywhere you go, looking for immorality (and they aren't tagged, they often look normal and might even be the local pastor or teacher, eww ), the ones I like to call your "Bottom of the Barrel Fish". What can you say. People are people no matter what the medium through which you meet. It looks to me like there is a wide array of people on here, be they good or bad.

I guess there are many reasons why someone would want to propagate the myth that this site is for those seeking sex. Perhaps that person had a bad experience on here. Or maybe the person wants to attract attention to this site for some personal reason, IE to create more fish to troll, or maybe it's a person that knows the guy that started the site and thinks this will boost it's popularity (not the fault of guy that created the site, no one can be held accountable for someone's poor actions) and possibly it was done simply to destroy the site or creator's reputation. Bad DJ, bad, bad, very bad.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 285 (view)
 
Who likes coffee for a frist date??
Posted: 9/3/2008 3:45:06 PM
I agree with OP. Coffee is not a date, it's a meeting. Going to the local fast food restaurant again, not a date, even my 18 year old son knows better than that. Those are more like job interviews, which are uncomfortable. Gee, do I measure up, did I answer all questions correctly. Give me a break guys, what planet did you come from you say.

You should have, especially if you met on here, already been conversing enough to know something about the person. Why put so much pressure on yourself and the other person.

Dates are supposed to be fun. Go do something fun you both can enjoy or try something new together. Be creative. Imagination says a lot about a person and their depth. Coffee says boring. That's what you do with friends to catch up with. I would think most people would want someone interesting with interests, not a boring dud. If I want boring I can sit at home with the TV and mindlessly stare at it.

Even the old standard Dinner and a Movie is more of a date and enjoyable. For those out there that are dating impaired, it has always been my experience dating someone new or special "dinner" means something a little more on the fancy side, not somewhere they call out your number when your order is ready, COME ON!
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 48 (view)
 
Contradiction: The Pursuit. When does it end?
Posted: 9/3/2008 2:53:00 PM
You might want to let her go. It sounds as though she is playing with your heart and using you to stroke her ego when it suits her. She seems to be stringing you along. If so, she is not a good candidate for being THE ONE. You will always be left wondering where you stand. If you start showing interest in other girls and she actually does care for you she might then drop the silly game she is playing. Perhaps she suffers from low self-esteem and has a need for your attention you are all too willing to give.

Pray about it. If she truly is the ONE then it'll happen, if not you will be free of this torment. Don't continue to be this cat's mouse to play with, in time it will ruin your self-esteem. It's so hard for you because you have allowed your heart to get all wrapped up in it. It's not easy, but you need to become objective and see how you are being played. Yes, females can be players too, just like guys.

Let her have some competitors also. Remember you are young this is not the time to be tied down to only one person no matter how much you are attracted to them. This girl obviously feels this way. She so much as told you. Listen to what she said and REALLY hear it. Maybe she isn't ready for choosing just one, then it's no good to put the pressure on her to choose because she wants to keep seeing all of her suitors, and does really like all of you. Good Luck.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 11 (view)
 
So What's The Deal?
Posted: 9/3/2008 1:24:50 PM
[/I would really appreciate if just the guys posted here on this particular post, PLEASE and THANK YOU!! I want the guy's perspective ONLY!] OOPS, my bad, shouldn't say ONLY.

Okay, so I accidentally worded something wrong here in the forum, I apologize for my mistake. What I meant to say was this is a question that I needed help from the guys as to the importance of pics to them. It wasn't meant as an exclusion. I just wanted EVERYONE to stay ON-TOPIC. I am so sorry. I'm new and hopefully will be forgiven my blunder. I feel the guys have stayed on topic. When 2good2b4got10 only gave her opinion, I felt it was off topic and she was just being full of herself and bashing me for my choice of no pic. I thought I was to the point but apparently was taken for rudeness which was not my intent. Again, SORRY to anyone offended. It was late and I was being SLAMMED. Did not know I should just ask for her post to be deleted, now I know.

I feel this is an important thread and helpful to the rest of us girls trying to understand the guy's need of pics. I hope that it is not deleted because of one mistake in my wording.

I'm new, I'm human, I'm learning. I will ask for her post and mine that followed to be deleted from the thread, and I guess I should ask for this one to be deleted also while I'm at it. Then hopefully all will be alright in the world of forum posting again. SORRY & THANKS for the info on posting in forums.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 52 (view)
 
Why No Picture?
Posted: 9/3/2008 12:32:11 AM
I just thought of another extremely good reason and the "mother of all reasons" not to post a pic for public view. Because you are a mother (or father) and have children that are young enough to be embarrassed that mom or dad are using an internet dating site. Our children's feelings and emotional well being should always be considered first in our decisions we make. Your children have already suffered enough having had mom and dad divorce or separate, why cause them more unnecessary anguish for something not their fault. This has to be the best and most important reason of all. One that affects me directly. My children are what is most important to me and my first responsibility, not making some stranger more comfortable that doesn't know or care about my children. It's all about privacy, including your children's, they have that right too.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
So What's The Deal?
Posted: 9/3/2008 12:23:23 AM
I just thought of another extremely good reason and the "mother of all reasons" not to post a pic for public view. Because you are a mother (or father) and have children that are young enough to be embarrassed that mom or dad are using an internet dating site. Our children's feelings and emotional well being should always be considered first in our decisions we make. Your children have already suffered enough having had mom and dad divorce or separate, why cause them more unnecessary anguish for something not their fault. This has to be the best and most important reason of all. One that affects me directly. My children are what is most important to me and my first responsibility, not making some stranger more comfortable that doesn't know or care about my children. It's all about privacy, including your children's, they have that right too.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
A rose is a rose is a rose (or when does it matter if you are rose worthy)
Posted: 9/3/2008 12:03:08 AM
What does it hurt to send one if you really are wanting to. I don't think I would over think it if I felt so inclined to send one.

Here's something I was thinking though, people can see how many roses you have left to send, perhaps it is better to send one of those other "virtual gift" things with an email. NO one can see except the receiver of the gift then, making it more private and special.

When I see someone is missing one or both of their roses to send it tells me they have someone else they are interested in, meaning there is competition. If you are checking someone out frequently enough then you can see just how many roses they are giving out. You are given 2 every 30 days to give. Either they have someone very special they are giving all their roses to or the roses don't mean much to them and they are freely giving them out to whomever at the moment just because they can. Tells a lot about the person, doesn't it! Are they quality fishing or quantity fishing. Maybe they are this way about other things to that are more personal. Hummm, food for thought.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 66 (view)
 
What do high number in favorite lists indicate if anything?
Posted: 9/2/2008 11:48:28 PM
The reason I add someone as my favorite is because I looked at their profile and saw they met the criteria of "no smoking" and "no drinking" and possibly might be someone I would have some common interests with. It is like looking for a needle in a haystack. This way if I feel like it later I can always email them later.

Another reason I might add someone to my favorites is there is something interesting or unique about their profile that I might want to go back to later. Or I might want to ask them about something or just comment on later.

So I guess in these cases there isn't a whole lot to it. Maybe some people just have interesting profiles or really good pics. Some maybe post in the forums and have made friends from here or are of interest to the person because of their forum posts being so good or interesting.

Maybe some people don't realize they can delete themselves from someones favorites. Or they think it's impressive to have higher favorites numbers or possibly even don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by deleting them. All kinds of possibilities. You could always ask them why they are so popular. What's that saying about going straight to the horses mouth (source) for the truth or something like that.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 9 (view)
 
So What's The Deal?
Posted: 9/2/2008 11:18:34 PM
Well 2good2b4got10. This post was really only intended to have the guys input since it has to do with THEM and THEIR perspective on the whole pic thing. They have already been quite helpful and sweet. And a middle age to younger guy can give more of the perspective I am searching for. I'm at a different stage of life than you, these guys get it. You are just talking about yourself, I'm not interested in the woman perspective, I already have that as I AM a woman.

I don't have a problem with how I look and tend to attract in real life more than enough men, even younger ones (I look much younger than my age also, from no drink, no smoke, etc). But they are usually not the type of guy I want. The bad boys, the needy, the shallow, the users/abusers, the selfish, the self-centered, and everything else I don't want or need. My problem as you must have missed goes beyond all that, and also has to do with me being wiser than to post without thought. I have learned to think before I do, no regrets that way. Reread OP and subsequent posts more thoroughly please before posting. You don't have to be that old to be wise either. The guys totally get it, don't know why you didn't. I've found other posts on this same subject since I posted, same conclusions, they get it too! WHY NOT YOU!!! So MANY good reasons to NOT post pics!

I'm a busy single mom and don't have the time for all the "screening" I would have to do if I posted a pic for everyone to see. I really want to only deal with those that are more serious than superficial, which I do happen to be finding. I suppose when I'm older and not working and don't have others to be responsible for then maybe I will welcome an unwanted flood. Thankfully, which I am sure because I didn't willy nilly post a pic for everyone to see, have had a lot of guys view my profile (actually read to decide) and move on. When I check who's viewed me I can see most are not what I am looking for anyway and have saved me the time of dealing with a barge of unwanted mail. Thank God!! And thank God for guiding me in the right direction. I'm getting exactly what I was looking for. "No pic" has turned out to be a great "pre-screener", which I have noticed most of the women in my area are doing. As I have had some guys point out it actually gives them an advantage to contact us "no pics", less competition. These are more innovative kind of guys.

I'm beginning to find after talking to the decent guys, that more of the problem is them being gun shy after being shot down, mislead or used then dumped on this site. Shame on the women out there doing that! No one likes to be treated that way, including me. What goes around comes around.

Hey you good guys out there, next time you see a woman in public that you think you don't stand a chance with, take the risk, talk to her, ask for her number or give her yours or exchange emails. GO FOR IT! I wish those guys were the ones approaching me instead of the jerks. Then I wouldn't be here doing this. Take a chance, be pleasantly surprised. Live without "what if" regrets. If one turns you down, oh well, then she wasn't the one for you. Keep trying till you find one that says yes. She might even be me. Before you tell me, I know, I could do the same, but I am old-fashioned and an introvert and I am more comfortable being asked.

My corresponding guys will be the ones that get my pics for sure when I am able to get them on my computer. (BUSY SINGLE MOM, remember, school just started again & getting one set-up for college) Their patience is appreciated. One more thing, these sites are set-up so you can modify it to your own personal NEEDS and WANTS, which is REALLY what it is ALL about!!

I would really appreciate if just the guys posted here on this particular post, PLEASE and THANK YOU!! I want the guy's perspective ONLY!
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 7 (view)
 
So What's The Deal?
Posted: 8/31/2008 7:57:52 PM
Thanks Terry. I do know about that private image option and will probably use it.

You seem to understand my point of view and thank you for the supportive remarks. Now how do I get these other guys to understand this?

Maybe I should stick to how I felt in the first place. Have some communication so that you know that you have things in common and similar values. I'm looking for something superior to what I have had in the past. I just don't want anymore shallow meaningless relationships, they don't last. I want someone for who (character) they are not what (looks, power & money) they are and would hope they would want the same.

I checked out your profile. Interesting, funny and I never had a professor that looked like you, KUDOS. That was smart and original what you did with your pics. Always something to be aware of, identity theft. I feel like I can go back and really put what I want in my profile after seeing yours. No need to keep it short and sweet, huh. I was afraid of losing the interest of searchers if it was lengthy, but then those are probably ones I wouldn't want anyhow. You speak my thoughts exactly about character and beauty. My signature on my yahoo email says "Outside beauty fades with time, but inside beauty grows and lasts forever". I like the car, reminds me a bit of my first car. Happy fishing my friend!
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Is this web site really works
Posted: 8/29/2008 8:44:59 PM
[well i have been on here for all most a year now and i am starting to think the same thing...and when will i ever meet that someone for me...i was told to add pic and that would help but i didn't see any changes...good luck to all and to me...lol]

Have you done searches and added ones that you would consider to your favs? That helps get your profile looked at and sometimes emails.

Maybe update your photos. I have noticed when I checked other females profiles to see if they were getting added to guys favs (trying to get ideas to get more emails and fav adds) that the ones that were added to more favs were ones with out of the ordinary photos. Like unusual pose (head tilted /w more close up view), unusual angle to the photo, you know, that kind of thing. I guess get creative with your pics and smile big! Think about it, when you are checking out profiles it's those unique and unusual pics that really grab your attention, and the GREAT SMILES.

Perhaps add a little more detail to your profile, these are just suggestions, trying to help. Do a forum thread asking what others do to get more attention. Check out the female profiles and maybe email ones directly that are on a lot of guys favs to ask for tips. Good luck .
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 25 (view)
 
A Song That I Hate #1
Posted: 8/29/2008 1:35:44 AM
[Paul Anka's "Having My Baby", ugh. Hold on while I spew. Oh yeah, and that "Pinada Colada" song. My 22 year old daughter likes that. Where did I go wrong?]

Having My Baby, yes, it makes me cringe and want to puke when I hear it!
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 51 (view)
 
Why No Picture?
Posted: 8/29/2008 12:29:10 AM
Here's my reasons for not wanting to post a pic:

I would like to know that the guy is actually interested in the real me inside, not just my outside and trying to get together just because he likes the way I look. All the while not giving a rip about me as a person. It happens. I don't want a shallow guy.

Privacy. It is a small County I live in and even smaller city. I usually work with the public. I really don't feel the whole world needs to know my personal business. I know quite a lot of people. I know when I bring up searches for guys it pops up a lot of people I have met already some way or another in the community. Gotta hand to you guys, you're braver than I about putting it all out there for EVERYONE to see!

I am sure there are many more good reasons why to not post a pic.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Hey Girls Be Careful!!!!!!
Posted: 8/28/2008 11:52:40 PM
I've had guys try to scam me too! It's been on other sites though, not here so far, but I'm new. You really have to watch out. I have found the ones that try to get you to email them on their yahoo accounts are the ones to watch out for. It doesn't take them to long before they ask for the money. Don't ever let someone have private info like bank acct numbers and such. And I would be careful about giving out your phone numbers. This one guy really kept putting the pressure on me to give him my phone number. I simply did not give in, you have to be strong. Wrong kind of phish.

These guys usually try to be overtly friendly and flirty, real smooth operators. They are way too friendly way too fast. Calling you baby and pretty and stuff, yuck. I don't let them get away with it because I have children. When someone takes advantage of me they are also taking advantage of my children. That's what I always remember when someone is trying to make a sucker out of me.

This guy needs to be turned into the police too, it's not right to allow this to go on. It only encourages more scammers to scam others, it has gotten pretty bad. Myspace and Yahoo are the worst for it. Don't let this guy get away with it. Think of your daughter. Don't be foolish.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 5 (view)
 
So What's The Deal?
Posted: 8/28/2008 11:05:59 PM
Okay, it makes it a little more believable that it isn't some kid goofing on you if there is a pic. But I would think you might be able to also tell that a little bit from the conversation in the emails too, wouldn't they be a little more juvenile?

In regards to becoming interested because of the conversations but if they turn out to be what you consider to be Barky the neighbor's dog, isn't that a little shallow? (like Shallow Hal) Isn't it more important what the person is like on the inside than that ever changing outside wrapper. I have known some people that seem so good looking when you first meet them but as you get to know them they are so ugly on the inside after awhile they don't seem very good looking on the outside either. Isn't that a waste of time too? I'm just thinking...

So then given that you guys want your girl to be pretty (or attractive by your standards) then does this mean that if a girl was pretty enough would you not care if she was stupid or just a full on **** of a person? And does she need to be pretty for you to look at or also so that others will be envious of what you have on your arm. I'm curious, I want to really understand how you guys tick. For me it is the quality of what is inside that matters far more, not the looks or material things. And I also would want a guy to want to be with me because of what I'm like on the inside, not just for my looks. I worry about that some of these guys might only be interested in my looks and not care about the person I am. What if I had a disfiguring accident, would the guy lose interest in me after being involved with me or married to me?

I came across this thing called the ladder theory last night, it was a little horrifying. Yes it was kind of laughable, but I do believe there are some people out there that live by those standards. It is pretty superficial standards for both the guys and the girls. Have you heard of it?

Thanks for taking the time to respond. So what are your thoughts on all this?

You guys are good looking by the way. Well we don't know about hotmike though, yea, where's your pic hotmike? I feel for you younger guys, most the girls your age are pretty vapid and looking for the rich guys to use. How is MrMaybeRite making out on here, I see you've been here since 2004? 4 yrs, okay that not to encouraging, are you looking for a permanent relationship and not finding any fish worth keeping, what's the story?

Oh and yes there are some guys checking out my profile that I have not added to my favs but most that look are on my favs list. And one of the guys that asked for a pic actually answered some of my questions today. I feel a little better about that, at least he's willing. You guys hang in there too. Guess I better find a pic to add soon.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Is this web site really works
Posted: 8/28/2008 3:46:31 AM
Well I'm a woman and I just joined this last weekend. I am already getting pretty annoyed with the whole thing. Seems the guys are only concerned with your looks and are hung up on seeing a pic in order to talk to you. I sent a reply back to a guy earlier that asked for pics, I asked some easy going questions. I can see he read my email but he never bothered to answer my questions. I beginning to think why should I bother to send a pic to someone who is unwilling to answer my questions and talk a little. I wouldn't be that way, seems rude.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
So What's The Deal?
Posted: 8/28/2008 3:35:36 AM
Okay, so what's the deal with the pic obsession with guys. I am new here. Not even been a week. I am looking through profiles and adding some to my favs. Working up the nerve to message them and still have some tweaking to do to my profile I think.

So in the mean time these guys see I have added them to my favs and they message me. What's the first thing they do, ask for a pic. Seems to be a concern even though I myself would not totally trust the pics, I have experienced some people on other sites putting up pics not theirs and making fake profiles. How do you really know a person is for real?

I message them back to let them know I will see about getting pics added. Now mind you I am not to thrilled about the whole pic thing. I like my privacy and don't feel like broadcasting to everyone in my small community that I am looking and considering dating again now. I will just send the pics to individuals as I go along I guess.

Now here is the thing that really annoys me. I try to be friendly and have some conversation, tell a little about me, ask some questions relating to their profile, and give complements on their profiles. No one has answered one single question I have asked, why? They aren't that personal or nosy or anything like that. I don't understand, isn't it the whole point of emailing on here to get to know someone first? Are guys just interested in what you look like, the outside wrapper.

I would also like to know is anyone having good experiences with meeting anyone on here, emailing them or meeting them. Especially local people in your own area? I am really nervous about this way meeting people and have been off of the dating circuit for about 21 yrs now and don't really know what to expect. HELP!! Thanks
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 670 (view)
 
What makes a woman over 40 sexy?
Posted: 8/26/2008 10:29:22 PM
Wow, makes a lady in her 40's feel good to hear a lot of the positive comments.

It has to be life's experiences that make you more comfortable with yourself therefore making it more comfortable to interact with others. I am far more comfortable being friendly with strangers now. My son thinks sometimes I already know people I talk to in public that are strangers just because of the ease of which I converse with them.

How wonderful it is to feel self assured and be able to express your opinions freely. I love being at this age, I wouldn't trade it at all. The older I get the better it is living and the happier I am. I believe there is still so much to look forward to. I am sure my future relationships will be far superior to past ones. There is no way I will ever put up with some of the silly nonsense I did when I was younger.

I have learned to love and accept myself flaws and all, makes it a lot easier to just be yourself and not worry what anyone else thinks. After all everyone is flawed. At least I know I am for real and not fake.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 12 (view)
 
when is the best time to kiss a girl on the first date
Posted: 8/26/2008 9:40:27 PM
I'm with you. I don't really want to be kissed when I am only beginning to get to know someone, it's just to personal. You shouldn't have to feel like it is mandatory just because you are on a date. I prefer to save kissing for someone I am really into and there are sparks. Now I have had some very romantic, chivalrous guys take my hand and kiss it, I love that, it is so sweet and gentle. Or sometimes a quick little peck on the cheek, that is nice too.

There is also the hug, if you know the person good enough. You have to be careful though, there are different kinds of hugs that say different things. Handshakes are strange, somewhat formal. Handshakes are more of something I do when I have just met someone or I am greeting someone, but very odd at the end of a date. A little peculiar at the end of the evening with a friend too. What do you think?

And if I am going out with a guy I consider to just be in the friendship stage, I really don't feel like he has any business kissing me on the lips, a friend that is a female wouldn't, why should he just because he is a guy.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Hall & Oates
Posted: 8/25/2008 10:03:55 PM
Hi Rick!
First of all I would have even emailed you but your mail is set to a 75 mile limit and I am a bit farther than that, lol.
Love Hall and Oates. They have a great sound, good songs with a lot of great lyrics. I have quite a lot of their music. I even enjoyed the flip side (B-side) of the 45's.
I noticed you mention being in a band on your profile. I take it you play drums (my favorite) by your profile name. What kind of music did you play? Do you still play?
If you changed your email setting I would be able to write you, if you are interested in a friend for starts. Let me know.
 foreversnowwhite
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 13 (view)
 
A Song That I Hate #1
Posted: 8/25/2008 9:35:49 PM
That's hilarious! Oh I would love to do something like that. Maybe I will try it sometime. That must have been pretty funny, how long before people would freak out over it? Probably aren't too many songs a person could really stand to hear 10 times in a row.

Oh let's see, there a few songs that grate my nerves. One that comes to mind is by Nelly, it goes on about "It's getting hot in here, so take off your clothes" something like that. It is so annoying I have to turn the radio off when that comes on. If I think about it I could probably come up with a few more I can't stand.

I get sick of the songs that have practically every other word a cuss word. What is the point in that, it's not music, art, or talent. Ugh!

My boys and I have a little saying "Rap is Crap!" My son says it originally was labeled crap, they just removed the c is all.
 
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