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Thread: One person clothed, another naked?

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 61 (view)

One person clothed, another naked? Posted: 8/28/2009 12:47:13 PM
The last guy I was with had a thing about that. He would come round to mine, stand and kiss me in front of the full length mirror, strip me, while not allowing me to remove his clothing, and then ask for the light to be turned off. It was a weird feeling. I felt completely vulnerable, and at his mercy, which was a massive turn on, but then he'd ask for the light to be turned off, and suddenly I was the one in control again. I would be full of confidence again simply because of this one request before he would strip. Once we were in bed he'd take over again and be really dominant. I was very disappointed when that all ended

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 69 (view)

Should men be discriminated against because of long hair? Posted: 8/28/2009 12:02:56 PM
OP, there is a very good reason for this: bad boys have long hair, and bad boys are bad people, so they are bad for business. This made me laugh. I don't mean any offense by that, but all the 'bad boys' I've dated have had quite short hair, the longest was comparable to Till Lindemann's in his wikipedia photo (my word does he have sex appeal, but that's another matter). Of the many men I know with long hair only one would describe himself as a bad boy. I don't agree with him, he's too protective of his female friends and won't put up with anyone treating a woman badly. Your assumption is the exact opposite to my experiences. I work in finance. I have 5 years of banking experience, and have worked with 5 or 6 men with long hair during that time, both in high street banks and in local mutual building societies. I know store managers and assistant store managers with hair down to their waists, worked in kitchens with men who had longer hair than I did. I have long-haired male friends who work in optometry, retail, hospitality, finance and administration. They are treated with respect by their employers, because they deserve it. They're judged on their own merits and work ethic, not their appearance. Obviously sometimes there are members of the public who discriminate, but everyone gets some form of discrimination from time to time. As far as attraction is concerned, it depends entirely on what suits him. If a guy has long hair and it doesn't suit him, it's a turn off. Likewise, a guy with a 'short back & sides' can look awful if it doesn't work for him.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 10 (view)

Australia...one of the best places in the world... Posted: 5/28/2006 3:55:21 PM
I grew up in WA, near Perth. King's Park is amazing - you can see the whole city from there. Go for a swim in the Swan (just watch out for crocs), see Kalbarri (stunning) got to Kalgoolie and Coolgardie (gold rush!) Perth is a great city - seriously diverse. the food you can get is incredible. Visit the Pinnacles. Go to Rottnest Island. Wander round Freo, see the roundhouse and the markets (seriously, the smell of those markets is still with me now, and I've been once in the last decade). ningaloo marine park is aparently amazing (I never got to go, but I plan on going back one day and seeing that). Margaret River for the vineyards. Broome, Kununurra, Esperance, the Bungle Bungle range, Karinjini national park, broome (stunning beach). Cottesloe beach is also fantastic, although there were a few shark attacks a couple of years back. For food, I would recommend Miss Mauds (smorgasbord - not traditional, but still good), as edward said, Raffles do very good food, but if you want to try the aussie delicacies, Prickles is best. Yabbies, roo, emu, crocodile, possum, and even witchetty grubs. I have to go back. Perth is my home, it always will be. I've already decided I'll raise my kids there (if I have any), because the lifestyle is so laid back, and a lot more innocent than the uk. We spent 3 months travelling round Aus, in a caravan. Seriously, the west coast is the best. My heart will always be there, and I know several other people who felt an affinity with the place once they went.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 6 (view)

Romantic Gestures - (a question for the ladies) Posted: 5/17/2006 12:40:01 PM
The most romantic things are the small things. You walk in after a rough day at work, and there's someone there who doesn't make demands, and doesn't criticise, just accepts you. Someone who knows when you need a hug, and will leave it at just that, without trying to push it further. Of the list you've put, I think I'd prefer either the bubble bath, waiting for me after work, or the love note, slipped into my bag without me noticing. The most romantic thing my ex did for me was on a day I called in sick. I had a stomach bug, and no strength to move at all. A few weeks earlier i'd mentioned that I wanted to buy a certain album. When he came home, I was curled up in bed feeling awful, and he just put the album on. I didn't even think he'd been listening when I mentioned it.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 25 (view)

Soul Mates ... whats your opinion? Posted: 5/17/2006 12:31:53 PM
posted byprolibertate And while I believe that many people do have one soulmate, I also believe that they can have more than one. It all depends on what one's definition of soulmate is. Webster's says it's "a person temperamentally suited to another"...that could mean anything from a friend to relative to lover. Another definition of soulmate is a soul that has agreed to connect with you on this planet for a purpose; to clear up karma, to accomplish a particular goal, etc. They have come into your life for a reason. Some may last a lifetime, while others may only last as long as it takes to accomplish the particular purpose they’re together for. Twin Flame are different than soulmates; they’re two people in separate bodies who share the same soul. They compliment each other, have a very strong bond, it can be hard to distinguish between them; their lives prior to meeting may have many parallels. They complete each other. While I personally believe we all have a number of soulmates, I believe we only have one twin flame. And that while we can have a wonderful romantic relationship with someone who is a soulmate, a relationship with a twin flame is still better...but less likely to happen. This pretty much sums up what i've always believed. I hate the general idea of 'a soul mate' being the only person in the world you are supposed to be with, because the chances of meeting them would be so minute that it would just depress me to think of how few people would find true happiness. I believe a soul mate is that person you just connect with, the ones that make you think "it's like I've known you all my life" whether they be male or female they just become so important to you. Whether this lasts or not... I'd like to think that connection would always be there, but the truth is, people change, friendships change, and so soul mates will lose that link. What they once meant to you will always be there though.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 32 (view)

My exboyfriend won't leave me alone! Posted: 3/15/2006 9:18:45 AM
I'm having a similar problem with my ex. We split up a year ago and I haven't spoken to him since. I've bumped into him on nights out, but not to talk to. I have had a few text converations with him, he said he wanted to be friends, and to meet up, I said the next time I'm on a night out with my friends I might see him. When he made it clear it wasn't friendship he was after I just said "In that case I won't be meeting up with you. Things ended for a reason, and I can't go back, I don't want to. It wouldn't be fair to give you the wrong idea or false hope so goodbye." I've had a Christmas card from him, and texts wishing me a happy birthday, telling me how sorry he is, how he didn't realise what he'd lost until too late etc. I've not replied since May or June last year. It's got to the point where, even though he doesn't live here anymore, I'm still looking out for him, just in case. So I'm moving soon, and changing my number. May seem a bit drastic, but I'm tired of his family telling me how he's doing, and how he doesn't have a girlfriend. Good luck with getting the message across.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 135 (view)

What do you hate most about being single? Posted: 12/4/2005 1:45:55 PM
I don't mind not having sex, but I would like someone who'll hug me when I need it. Just to be able to go to someone and have them wrap their arms around you feels so good, and I didn't start to miss it until someone did that possesive, protective hug. Sadly, it wasn't a person I wanted it from. Other than that I don't mind being single. At least I can make my own choices.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

How much courage do you really have? Posted: 12/4/2005 1:19:38 PM
I discovered that I don't stand up for myself enough. I allowed myself to be treated badly, dumped several times, only to go running back whenever he asked, and for nothing to change. After the relationship ended I found out that my mother was worried about me, because before I spoke I always looked to him, as if for permission to speak, acknowledgement that what I was saying was ok. I don't like that thought. I didn't defend myself against accusations that I was sleeping with every male collegue I have. Obviously I told him that I'd never cheat on him, but I didn't get angry about his lack of trust, which I think I needed to do in order for me to get my point through. I didn't talk through our problems. Neither did he, it was a fault we both had. We had an argument, we both went off and fumed, I went back and made up with him (peace offerings - cups of tea, dinner etc) and nothing more was said about it the next day. I also learned that when i was hurting, I didn't let him know. He'd make "teasing" comments (ie, insults thinly disguised as jokes) that upset me, and I'd stay quiet, until he made one too many ("are you ok to go shopping without me, I think it'd be a disaster, who knows what you'd end up wearing" coincidentally, once I dumped him and started chosing my own clothes, I looked less like a Barbie, and more like a human.) and I'd fly off the handle, storming off, leaving him on his own. I have a tendency to put aside my personality in order to become more like what he wants. He likes platinum blonde, so I bleach my ash blonde hair. He likes girls in pink, so I buy pink. He likes girls in trainers, so i wear trainers. I like my natural colour (that pic is awful, my hair looks yellow), I don't like pink except in small doses. I don't like trainers, they're too....chav, give me a classic pair of black ankle boots, or heels any day. Plus he was shorter than me so I allowed him to bully me into not wearing heels, unless I walked literally in the gutter. I needed a spine.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

Its OK for women to cheat. Posted: 11/27/2005 8:49:00 AM
Therein lies the trouble, blame one's partner for one's own stupidity...? Never. Exactly. There's absolutely no basis for the claim "You made me, you didn't show enough affection" or "He was too persistant" or worse "you did it to me" If you aren't getting enough affection from your partner, talk to them, don't just jump into bed with the next guy who offers. Too persistant? Sorry, but love = willpower. If you love someone, it's not hard to say no to anyone else. If he cheated on you in the past, you orgave and agreed to move on (I hope, otherwise why would you still be together?) so move on. Don't use that as an excuse for everything. It's not ok to cheat. End of. There's no excuse for it, and the only person to blame is the one who cheated.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 24 (view)

Its OK for women to cheat. Posted: 11/27/2005 8:37:03 AM
The real reason is that women are 'the weaker sex' and therefore nothing is our fault and it was some big bad man who made us. Or not. Everyone should accept responsibility for their actions. You cheat, then you did wrong, no one else. And trust me, you did wrong.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 73 (view)

Ladies please stop saying...... Posted: 11/27/2005 8:31:05 AM
I always thought a profile was supposed to be about you, your interests, hopes etc. I didn't know it was supposed to be like a letter to Santa.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 159 (view)

Ladies. Do you really want to know how to keep your man? Posted: 11/10/2005 3:29:26 PM
I found your last post more than a little patronising, at the age of 21, I find it insulting that you think me incapable of having a serious relationship. I don't want to 'have fun without being attached' I'd rather spend time with close friends, and someone I care about, than a load of people I don't really know that well, who will most likely be pissed as farts. There are no age limits. If you meet someone you really care about, then it doesn't matter how old you are. Successful relationships of my friends and family include one girl who has been with her boyfriend since they were 13, throughout puberty and university they've stayed together. With regards to my parents my dad does the cooking, if my mum tried taking over he wouldn't be happy. My ex boyfriends parents had separate rooms,and his father was away a lot, so the third one had no place in their relationship. But he is devoted to his wife, he'd do anything for her. Society hasn't set age limits, especially not ones as specific as you mentioned. If you chose to get married at 18, it is suggested it's a little young, but no one says 'wait until you're 26'. But then maybe society is a lot more different in America than I thought. Sex is mutual. If he doesn't want it and she does, she gets upset, and vice versa. If neither of them want it, it plays no part. So it can play absolutely no role, depending on the couple. Folding. How exactly is that so important in a relationship? Granted, no one wants to go to work with creases everywhere, but would you seriously break up with someone simply because they didn't iron your clothes? Feeding depends on the couple. I'm happy to cook, I'm a trained grill chef, and have worked in kitchens, so I am more than happy to be left in a kitchen to cook. I impressed my ex's mother with my cooking, so much so that every time he and I had an evening off, she'd be round for a meal. But not every female likes cooking. Not every male likes his partner's cooking. Many men prefer to cook themselves

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 9 (view)

What are your deal breakers Posted: 11/10/2005 3:11:04 PM
Online: messages that just say 'hi'. I know it's hard to think of something to say, but please do better than just 'hi', there's nothing to reply to. If I send 'hi' back, would you have anything else to say? Thought not. Messages that say 'I make adult movies, would you like to be in one?' short answer: no. Long answer is unprintable. Offline: 1 Long nails. Sorry but it's a major turn off if a guy has long nails. I just find it cringeworthy. 2 Especially when they're filthy. 3 Telling me on a first date that you normally go commando. When I've just realised you've been wearing the same trousers for about 3 weeks. 4 Phoning me at midnight, waking me up, in order to tell me that you are "going to f*cking get" me. Thanks, I'm really going to appreciate that 5 Texting me while I'm at work, telling me how hard you are and exactly what you're doing. 3 weeks after you woke me up and threatened me. 6 Going to hit my female friends. It's not done. 7 Going to hit my male friends. They are my friends, they will ALWAYS come first if you behave like an idiot. 8 Bits of food in the corner of your mouth, I can't help but stare, which seems to make guys think I want to kiss them. 9 Having not blown your nose, or having blown it, but not checked to see what's still visible.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 27 (view)

Can you deal with it? Posted: 11/10/2005 2:58:06 PM
As they say, jealousy is an ugly thing. I'm a bit of an idealist in that I believe if you are in a relationship with someone then you should trust them, regardless of the gender of their friends. I have a lot of male friends, who I happily flirt with, but wouldn't dream of doing anything with, and I know they feel the same (they've told me that anyway). If I am with someone I only have eyes for them, and I hope they are the same. If I was in a relationship I would tone down my flirting, and I never do it in front of my partner. I flirt with customers for a reason, they're more likely to take out credit cards and open savings accounts etc if you flirt and put them in a good mood. Flirting with barmen helps you get served quicker, so that kind of thing I'd continue, especially when buying drinks for my boyfriend. One guy I went out with had loads of female friends, more than male, but his male mates were mine as well. So I knew I could trust him because they wouldn't lie to me, and they wouldn't let him hurt me. When we did split up (mutual), one of his oldest friends was ready to give him a black eye because he though I'd been hurt. If the person you are interested in has a lot of friends of the opposite sex, make them your friends too, all of them. That way it would be easier to notice if something was going on. But trust him/her, because misplaced jealousy can make him go elsewhere. It was a huge part of the reason I ended with my last boyfriend - his mistrust drove me mad.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 34 (view)

would you date someone who dated strippers? Posted: 11/10/2005 2:33:40 PM
Heck, I dated an attorney once- where can you go from there? Wow, I thought an estate agent was bad. j/k I'd date someone who had dated strippers. I knew a stripper, before she moved to Oz, and she was fanastic. I met her because I went to a strip club with my ex. His best friend ended up seeing one of her collegues. The girls who do that for a living, just dance. There's not really anything seedy about it, call it naive if you will, but after having long conversations with a lot of the girls from the club here it's the conclusion I've come to. Personally I wouldn't have a problem if a guy I was seeing had been out with a stripper before.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 154 (view)

Ladies. Do you really want to know how to keep your man? Posted: 11/10/2005 2:21:52 PM
You shouldn't be in a serious relationship before the age of 26 anyways. You should be out having fun without being attached to someone or else your relationship is doomed by the time you hit 30. At which time, as a woman you must follow the three F's in order to hold on to your man What? My parents met when my mum was younger than I am, they're still together and happy now, and she's 48. So putting an age limit on relationships doesn't work. Even if that were true, if I meet someone tomorrow,and the relationship is doomed by the time I'm 30,that's still 9 years, which seems fairly good going when you consider how many people there are over your age limit of 26 who barely last 2 months.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 49 (view)

When Meeting someone what is the first thing you look notice? Posted: 11/10/2005 9:13:51 AM
Eyes, mouth, hair, and once we get chatting, his hands. I have a thing for hands.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 139 (view)

Ladies. Do you really want to know how to keep your man? Posted: 11/10/2005 9:11:33 AM
So, as long as you ladies follow the three F's, you will not only have a successful relationship, but you may also have a very long lasting marriage. The three F's are: Folding Feeding & F*cking Tried that, got a bit fed up with being taken for granted, walked all over, and accused of things, so I left.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 176 (view)

Do You Men Read Our Whole Profiles? Posted: 11/10/2005 9:03:20 AM
Guys dont make it better by coming across like cavemen and talking about panties and all that goofy crap. Man, they should have gotten that out in high school. Yet some of these guys are 50. Hey man, thats just gross Never a truer word spoken. Just a little bit of advice here for some guys, the following is NOT a good way to get a girl to talk to you. I received it today on another site. My profile on that is simliar to the one I have on here, I specify that I'm quite shy, so why would I agree to this: At 3:35 PM on 10/11/2005 the match wrote: Hi Im a producer of adult video's and am currently working on one called specsy women..... I would love you to be in it. The production co will pay all expenses and Â£250 a day. Please let me know if you would consider this.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 206 (view)

Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military? Posted: 11/10/2005 5:21:15 AM
I would. Provided I knew I could trust him (but why have a relationship with anyone if you couldn't?). It would be hard not seeing them for long periods of time, but friends and family would mean you wouldn't be lonely, your job would keep you busy. As to cheating, why? I've never understood it myself. I trust the person I choose to be with, whoever he is, whatever he does for a living, I wouldn't be with someone I didn't trust. Hopefully, anyone I have a relationship with feels they can trust me, and doesn't accuse me of things I haven't done.

Joined: 10/5/2005

Msg: 218 (view)

Never Cheated and Never Will? Claim it &Tell Us Why..? Posted: 11/7/2005 12:30:28 PM
I've never cheated. My ex accused me of it, several times, partly because I worked with a lot of good-looking lads, and partly because I became good friends with one of them in particular. We had (and have) a flirty friendship, but neither of us would even consider getting together, even now I'm single. If I am with someone, in a serious relationship, then I barely even notice other guys, unless they are right in front of me. My ex was not the same. It hurts to be accused of cheating, especially when the accusations start after your partner has been saying to someone else that he wants them, and describing in detail what he'd do to them. I don't know if that counts as cheating, I'm still trying to decide how I feel about that and it's over a year down the line. I wouldn't forgive a kiss, if he initiated it, or didn't push away soon enough if she did, and anything more would mean that I wouldn't even hear him out. I'm fine with flirting, I do it myself. But I only flirt with people who I know won't take it seriously. If I can flirt with you in person, I don't want you. If I want you, I can't talk to you. I've not been cheated on, so I don't know what it feels like. The closest I had was a guy I was casually seeing kissing someone else in front of me, but since I wasn't really interested in more than someone to hug me when I needed it, I didn't really care. They're going out now, and she trusts him as far as she can throw him. I don't think I'm capable of cheating. I can imagine how much it would hurt the person I was with, and if I love them, I wouln't be able to hurt them. If I was that attracted to someone else, I'd end it. I don't understand the overlap a lot of people have. It ends up working against you, so that very few people will trust you enough to let you close.

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