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sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 69 (view)

Young engaged woman needs advice... Posted: 10/27/2009 8:36:58 PM
Based on what you've told us, you're reservation about getting married is quite justified. You're still very young, so there's really not hurry to get married. I would think at some point you need to talk to him about your concerns and see how he responds and utimately deals with them. If you don't see good reason to believe things will get better, getting married probably would be a bad idea. If those things bother you now enough to ask for advise, in time they could become resentment. Best of wishes and feel free to email if you want to talk more.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 57 (view)

Does Sex Change How you feel ? Posted: 10/27/2009 8:29:57 PM
I think it always changes how we feel... it's how we deal with those feelings that's important.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

What do i do? Posted: 10/27/2009 8:20:18 PM
Sometimes we give our own best advice...if he's what you hope for he'll be worth waiting for...

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

What's up with him? Posted: 10/27/2009 8:14:28 PM
Of course, we can only speculate with so little info. The best you can do I think is to just ask him in an casual way. Cheers

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 41 (view)

Talking in your sleep Posted: 10/3/2009 8:56:36 PM
If you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen! He may not even be aware of the what would cause him to say certain things in his sleep, so if you're not prepared to deal with it in a mature way you should leave it alone. Otherwise, you could tell him that your curious about what he says and see how he feels about you listening in.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 56 (view)

Should I trust this guy? Posted: 10/3/2009 8:50:51 PM
If you don't have any more confidence in him than that, you certainly don't need to be getting involved with him. I mean, even if it turns out that you had read too far into things, how can he feel secure always wondering if you trust his answers?

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 3 (view)

Does this make me a cougar? Posted: 10/3/2009 8:46:05 PM
Not all, especially seeing that you share a common sense of maturity. I think a cougar is an older gal who deliberately chases after younger guys for their youth even if they aren't equals...

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 41 (view)

I am confused as to what I need to do. Posted: 10/3/2009 8:32:29 PM
I think few couples ever realize an equality of love early on, but you go into a relationship with the confidence that you will grow on each other and find a happy balance. Such indecision would be cause for concern even if you lived in the same town, I would not close a long distance relationship in light of his insecurity.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 7 (view)

Could Not tonight honey, I have a headache soon become an obsolete phrase? Posted: 6/3/2009 11:18:16 PM
May not get over the headache, but if you can deal with the pain long enough for the release of endorphines it sure can lend to a few moments of sweet escape. :)

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 75 (view)

Should we try to love someone unconditionally? Posted: 6/3/2009 11:13:42 PM
Unconditional love is a journey, not a destination. New cliche??? I say that because few if any of us could ever reach that in it's purest form, but we should always strive to love more unconditionally, even if it means learning to temper it with prudence...for example, though we may learn not to be resentful against somebody who repeatedly does the same thing, it doesn't mean we keep giving the rope to do it again! SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 194 (view)

Friendship First Posted: 6/3/2009 11:06:17 PM
Really nice notion for thought, but every couple would need set a flexible time frame that best suits their charater. On the otherhand, there are those are more inclined to be open with each other as they get closer and a prolonged friendship only holds them back! SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 41 (view)

Competing with a dead spouse. Posted: 6/3/2009 10:51:02 PM
Your points do cause me to pause and reflect, but I can say that from a similar experience sometimes a person just isn't aware of what they are doing. When I moved past a woman I'd had a close connection to, my new gal pointed this out and almost immeadiately I was able to avoid making those sort of references. Loosing somebody through death is generally different in that neither party sought the seperation. Nevertheless, I've taken the matter to heart and I generally avoid making references to my late fiancee and our life together unless it"s pertinent to the discussion or I'm asked. Simply put, some guys may just need a gentle nudge.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 36 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/18/2009 12:07:59 AM
Damn, one had best be careful what they ask for! Btw, is that Jake in the side or corner pocket? lol

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 34 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/17/2009 10:51:43 PM
Work, you betcha! We all have stories about getting through divorce or shady plumbers. If you're going to have a talk show about your experiences then you're going to have to find a way to draw us in and entertain us. After all, just as I was poking fun at titles, I left the door open for you to "spew" at some issues. So, lighten up and show us what you've got and we'll give you plenty of subject matter to entertain yourself with!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 31 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/17/2009 9:11:53 PM
Of course, I was just playing on the pool table analogy and not serious. Maybe I'm being too modest for your entertainment. So, give us an example of the sorta soap you feel like spewing...

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 29 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/17/2009 8:28:09 PM
Are you taking suggestions for a title for your talk show didy. How about "Rack'em up with Q Ball" or "Jenny in the Side Pocket!" lol What in the world is so entertaining about packing...or am I falling for some wee hours of the morning sarcasm?

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 21 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/17/2009 12:20:34 AM
They say ignorance is bliss...hey, I'm a male you know!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/17/2009 12:13:29 AM
Aw, come on Jenny, have a heart. Everything after midnight and few drinks is funny!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/16/2009 11:42:42 PM
Not only a ticket for being nerdy, but chatting is an offense too. One more stike and they will relegate the both of us as well as your thread into forum oblivion. So, here's to having fun while it lasts.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/16/2009 11:25:33 PM
Answering our own posts are we...now that's what I called bored out of your freaking mind.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 7 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/16/2009 10:38:34 PM
Opps, spoke too soon! It would seem we are offered the chance to vote after you post. I was deleted for a similiar reason when I was being very sincere. Sadly, it would seem that there are those who are too quick to judge when at other times I've seen blantantly meaningless issuses that just go on and on. So much for jury by our peers!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 101 (view)

HUGE victory in California today for the rights of gun owners :) Posted: 5/16/2009 10:31:51 PM
What a hot potater. I grew up around guns and served in the Marine Corps, but like Tom Hanks said after making "Saving Private Ryan," I'm glad I never had to point a gun at anybody with the intent of shooting! On the up side, even if Japan had of invaded our mainland during WW2, they would've never gotten past the coastal states because for every soldier they could've put on shore, we could've put 10 or 20 armed citizens. On the otherhand, we are a culture of violence. I read some statistics a while back that said for that year thousands of under age kids were killed with guns while in Canada and Europe the number was neglible. I'm a staunch believer in our right to keep and bear arms, but neither am I riding any bandwagons!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 6 (view)

Bored out of my freaking mind,entertain me ,lol Posted: 5/16/2009 10:17:14 PM
Montrose is the place you need to be. The voting thingy is over now, so I guess it's okay to sulk. lol When I first came to Houston several years ago I could wait to plan my escape. Then I met a gal who showed me around this community just minutes from downtown and I would have never imagined. It's like small town Europe with a wide range of people, more outdoor eating than you can shake a stick at and one very romantic outdoor theater. We also have a theater and museum districts, oh yea, and the beach is less than an hour away! I don't often take advantage of these things, but it's just fun to just be around so much life and energy. Cheers

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

why did he not respond, even just to let me know he wasnt into me? Posted: 5/16/2009 1:04:51 PM
Such is the world of internet dating, but don't let it get the best of you. There're plenty of nice guys who will. SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Does anyone deserve a second chance? Posted: 5/16/2009 1:02:31 PM
They may deserve a second chance if they've made honest mistakes, but treat you poorly...they can change and I'm not just talking about an apology. Unless you have a compelling reason to give this person a lot of time to prove better, it's just as well that you moved on to greener pastures. SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

People of Internet Dating Land tell me what do you think!!! Posted: 5/6/2009 9:08:48 PM
I don't want a long distance relationship anymore than you. This is just a means to an end of hooking up with somebody and the internet offers us far more opportunities than those we might meet locally in person. Otherwise, I've enjoyed just getting aquainted with so many women and have made a few friends along the way that I will meet if we cross that bridge. For the most part, this is what you make of it and it's not for everybody! SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 2 (view)

male opinions please :) Posted: 5/6/2009 8:58:56 PM
I'm just not inclined to thing he's in another relationship of significance, but there does seem to be an issue. If you are that much into him you should just ask him about his interest and why he doesn't ask you out. SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 15 (view)

Im lost??? Posted: 5/2/2009 2:51:59 PM
You're only looking for one, so don't worry about the rest as long as you aren't rude or offensive and the right kind of guys will appreciate that! SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 12 (view)

Why do guy's think I'm lying or tricking them when I say I don't want commitment? Posted: 5/2/2009 2:49:27 PM
And there you have it! Many men just don't understand women, so they try to redefine women in their own delusion. Hang in there and look for the sort of guys who want to know more about you and then actually begin you see you in that light. SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 8 (view)

PLAYERS - UNDERSTOOD Posted: 5/2/2009 2:45:23 PM
There is a fine line between aquainting and making do! I've enjoyed talking with various women while searhing for that ltr but I try to keep it real. Though being playful is a good way to test chemistry, I try not to lead a girl on if I don't think it will go anywhere...unless of course, she just wants to have a little fun too. The important thing is that two people understand each other. The player only wants to fly under the radar, get what he can and then is gone!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 12 (view)

Why do some men rush, then unexpectedly back off Posted: 5/2/2009 2:29:07 PM
Okay, every guy is different and one or more could be sincere. Then again, it could be issues with commitment or they realized they bit more than they can chew. You just need to talk to these sort of guys to find out why. That may help you in better chooing one in the future. SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 16 (view)

Did I screw up? Posted: 4/25/2009 11:52:50 PM
Doesn't sound unreasonable...except the part about him telling you about the cougar and just wanting to get them to buy drinks. Now, that sounds pretty sorry to me.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 68 (view)

Pictures Posted: 4/25/2009 11:39:29 PM
The creator of this site calls the shots as it pleases him. Otherwise, we can always go somewhere else. I'd much rather focus on the reason I'm here to begin with...that is, connect with people and I've enjoyed the diversity with reasonable limitations. When it comes to free sites, this has got to be as about as good as it gets. SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 41 (view)

Women who use toys Posted: 4/25/2009 11:33:36 PM
If that's what tickles a woman's fancy, (no pun intented) then more power to ya. There's nothing like snuggling up to a happy camper!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 34 (view)

My gf’s crazy fantasy Posted: 4/25/2009 11:28:12 PM
Sometimes we don't always scatch where we itch. Your picture suggests that you're certainly isn't the S&M types and no hint of issues with her past , so maybe she just wants the rush. Why not get a baby sitter for the night and then just dominate her in every way, but without the implications of rape. Make her feel absolutely vulverable without feeling threatened and you just might not be able to turn her back off.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 45 (view)

Masturbation over sex? Posted: 4/25/2009 11:15:22 PM
Be careful with that one...it could go both ways. It could be as simple as he's done it so much over his life that he's just used to it or he could have fantasy issues. You really need to talk to him in a comfortable way for the both of you. SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 7 (view)

going on first date Posted: 4/25/2009 11:01:08 PM
Sounds like a really cool date with little room for any hidden agendas. Relax buddy and have youself a good time and I'm inclined to believe that she will too.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 43 (view)

GIRLS AND TATTOOS Posted: 4/25/2009 10:57:13 PM
Redundant, maybe. But nothing wrong with reviving an old subject for new readers. It all depends on the gal and her toos.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

She's a friend but I want more... Posted: 4/25/2009 10:51:18 PM
You may well get disappointed and it's even possible that she may want one of you to move out, but unless you can live with maybe wishing you had said something, you've got to find an appropriate time and maybe even a place other than your apartment and tell her. Living that way is no good for either of you. Good luck buddy.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 323 (view)

Women, what do you want from men other than money ? Posted: 4/25/2009 10:44:25 PM
Pick our cloths off the floor...I'll go one better, how about a guy that doesn't throw them on the floor in the first place. In my experience from a guys perspective, if you go down the yellow brick road of honesty, even the lion, scarecrow and tin man have a chance.

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 114 (view)

when attractive is a turn off Posted: 4/25/2009 10:32:29 PM
I once saw scanned the profile of a great looking woman who turned out to be a model. She didn't seem at all my type, but I dropped her a line anyways because amidst her poses was one photo were she was dressed in some simple feminine garb and very relaxed looking. I got the most appreciative response that could have just as easily been from the girl next door. One just never knows!!!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 5 (view)

Rebound? Posted: 4/25/2009 10:18:16 PM
Seven weeks isn't really that long, but three years since move out...sounds like your ready to me!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

do you think my wife will ever give us another go??? Posted: 4/25/2009 2:05:06 PM
Like you said, the woman had gone through some hard times and it sounds as if to no fault of her own. She's your wife and if you love her, 8 weeks is nothing! She might just need some counseling and you could maybe use some too, even if it's just some good friends to bounce things off of. I wouldn't even think about divorce for at least six months to a year. SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 4 (view)

Profile help? Posted: 4/25/2009 1:21:38 PM
Nothing wrong with your profile at a glance. Regardless, you're going to get a lot annoying mail...just the nature of the internet beast!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 20 (view)

Do you forget it ever happened? Posted: 4/25/2009 1:14:31 PM
Something sounds amiss, but there could be a real life problem. I would think that you should call and email just for your own peace of mind. SD

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 55 (view)

Is it possible to love someone with differing political views? Posted: 4/24/2009 6:59:23 PM
Of course two people with differing political views can do well together...just look at the liberal James Carville and conservative Mary Matalin and both of these people are avid political pundits! Simply put, the level of tolerance just needs to rise to the level of the differing views and there is absolutely no standard or guideline for this. Each and every situation is going to be different!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 14 (view)

Paranoid. Posted: 4/24/2009 6:46:36 PM
Can you say more red flags than you can shake a stick at? Sure, we can sometimes misunderstand things and it can take some patience to work them out...but there is just too many things wrong with his behavior. You might be able to help this man if you had the mind and experience of a counseler, but it doesn't sound like he would respond to a good psyc right now. The best answer may be your own, "I love him, but with him not trusting me..."

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

Guys, how much time do you chat with friends? Posted: 4/24/2009 7:41:02 AM
Wow, that could go either way! Only way you can tell for sure is to take the plunge!!!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Update... Confused post a few days ago... Posted: 4/24/2009 7:39:03 AM
Please don't say good guys never come your way...makes you sound sorry for yourself and that only attracts more flys! I mean, even if a guy is being sincere, do you want someone who is attracted to your dispair? They are there and they may well have tried to reach you, they just may not be the type of guy you were hoping for. Sometimes I hate cliches, but see your cup as half full and so will the good guys!

sanddallor

Joined: 8/30/2008

Msg: 21 (view)

Speedometer Posted: 4/24/2009 7:34:36 AM
lol...I didn't know guys did that. Sorry to waist a reply, but that's just infintile. What more could you hope to learn???

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