What's with the one-way conversations? chat & forums.

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Thread: What's with the one-way conversations?

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 21 (view)

What's with the one-way conversations? Posted: 11/1/2009 6:30:20 AM
i've had one way conversations myself it usually means or i've taken it to mean they aren't interested in you and stop emailing. i believe if someone is interested in you there should be a two way conversation going because i would want to find out as much about you as possible because i am interested in you. the other thought i have is the art of having a conversation with someone is disappearing i think due to technology and people just don't know how to hold a conversation anymore.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 21 (view)

question for the guys Posted: 8/5/2009 5:38:31 PM
i'm available for nights and weekends for all your remodeling projects...but it'll cost ya! no seriously i am not the type to brag about having a house it was alot of hard work for me to do on my own and something to be proud of. i don't think i am better then anyone for it, believe me that is not my personality. i was just wondering if it is something i should change in my profile. i appreciate the fedback!

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

question for the guys Posted: 8/5/2009 3:27:16 PM
my girlfriend and i were having a discussion the other day about whether or not men are intimidated by women who can take care of themselves. i kinda disagree with her but wanted a GUY'S opionion. If a woman is smart and stable financially and emotionally wouldn't you want to be with someone like that? i have a twin home that is 89 years old and needs alot of work done to. i have worked on it myself because i'm not afraid to do or think its only a man's job to do so to speak. is it intimidating to a guy if a woman has a house and he doesn't? i don't feel anyone is intimidated by me but i was just curious as to what the guys had to say...

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 10 (view)

Why would a woman prefer notto say they want children? Posted: 8/4/2009 5:26:11 PM
because some women think they can "real" you in, you'll fall in love with them and you'll do anything for them. in addition to that lets say you get married and then after the wedding they say opps..im pregnant...what are you going to do then? divorce them? or my favorite -they think they can change the guy. ive seen this happened where the guy already had two kids from a previous marriage and told his current wife he didn't want anymore kids and low and behold she was pregnant a year or two after they were married and she had threatened to leave if they didn't have a kid together. it makes no sense to me. i put undecided because i'm really undecided at this point and time. i think i want kids but then i change my mind so i honestly don't know.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 89 (view)

Cheating!!!! Posted: 8/4/2009 5:11:31 PM
well can you forgive her and never bring it up again? or are you always going to be wondering what she is doing and who she is with? If she has a substance abuse problem she is clearly not ready for a healthy, meaningful relationship. She needs to take care of herself first before becoming involved with someone else. And remember you can't change someone who has a substance abuse problem, they have to want to change themselves. so its a matter of what can you handle and what do you want?

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 858 (view)

Are there ANY women who don't CHEAT? Posted: 8/3/2009 6:22:34 PM
ok so are there any men out there that don't cheat? its a two way street when it comes to the cheating issue.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 9 (view)

Is there life on earth? Posted: 8/3/2009 6:13:46 PM
i'm 36 and i am right there with you..my friend and i joke around that i am too demanding because i want a guy to be able to pick up the phone and have a conversation with me. she usually says, " a conversation, how dare you? aren't you a bit demanding?" technology is ruining human relationships in my opinion. I want someone who can pick up the phone and have a conversation and if you can't do that i don't want you! i took care of the text messaging issue by blocking it so you have to call me on the cell or home number now my next venture has been to decide whether or not to just give out the good old home phone number like i used to do in high school. not to mention i think its rude to be on your cell phone in restaurants, the gym, etc. i was actually in dance class the one night and an older gentleman (grandpop age-not trying to offend anyone here) had his cell phone ring and answered it during the lesson and talked on the phone like nothing was going on! i just think its rude...

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 472 (view)

Over 30 -- What is your biggest turn on Posted: 8/3/2009 1:15:16 PM
i love a guy that can dance-huge turn on.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 17 (view)

Starter husbands... Posted: 8/3/2009 1:10:46 PM
i think this ties in with another thread i answered...i think people are settling to be with someone because they don't want to be alone which then leads to either cheating or the marriage just breaking up. its a new theory i came up with because i know too many people who have been cheated on or aren't happy in their marriages and it just doesn't make sense as to why this is increasing so much.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 119 (view)

Yes means No? Posted: 8/1/2009 3:19:50 PM
im not sure i understand your thread but what i have learned over the years is to not go by what people say but by their actions and behaviors. a person's behaviors and actions should match their words and if they don't there is a problem and you need to follow what the behaviors and actions are telling you.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 386 (view)

How important is chivalry in an relationship to you? Posted: 8/1/2009 3:15:00 PM
i think chivalry shows how a man is going to treat you.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 39 (view)

Is being faithful a thing of the past? Posted: 8/1/2009 3:12:34 PM
i think people may be settling to be with someone because they don't want to be alone and then while with that person they find someone who they want to spend their life with and the affair starts. i know too many unhappy couples and people who have been cheated on. I was cheated on. My co-worker's husband cheated on her the entire 8 years they were married with someone they were friends with. i have questioned if anyone stays faithful anymore as well. i have also questioned whether or not technology is ruining personal relationships. i got tired of the guys who would only text message and not pick up the phone to have a conversation. i think the art of having a conversation is disappearing as well but i have hopefully resolved that issue by blocking my text messaging so he will have to call me! Who would have thought being able to have a conversation on the phone would now be a relationship requirement-at least to me it is!

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 54 (view)

Why do Women hold men hostage on the phone? Posted: 8/1/2009 3:00:59 PM
Women connect to men through conversation and men connect to women through sex-plain and simple.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 53 (view)

Is having a check list the key? Posted: 8/1/2009 2:56:40 PM
i don't know that i have a list but i would like to have some common hobbies to enjoy together. i will usually ask about family and what their background is with their parents, that can actually tell you alot if you know what you are looking for. you want to see what their role models were like. were their parents happily married for 50 years (exaggerating to make point), divorced, was one parent an alcoholic or drug user, did they work alot (emotionally or physically unavailable), was a particular day "family day." Patterns of behavior tend to repeat themselves so if you want to find out what type of relationship you might have with someone you are interested in ask about their family. I am not saying if they came from an alcoholic household they are going to be alcoholics -some people follow these patterns and others don't.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 116 (view)

For a Laugh- What movie would you base your life on as of now? Posted: 8/1/2009 2:47:22 PM
i would have to say "must love dogs", "Under theTuscan Sun" or "Holiday" (with cameron diaz in it)-the frustrations of dating and trying to find that special someone are in all three movies and that describes my situation right now.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 32 (view)

Competing with a dead spouse. Posted: 6/3/2009 1:22:11 PM
i think you need to calm down a little first of all. He was married to his wife for 28 years and clearly loved her. how long has it been since she has been deceased? if it was just recently he may need more time to grieve her loss. how long has he been dating and how many dates has he gone on? give the guy a break his wife of 28 years is dead. i think you need to show a little bit more compassion here and you need to decide whether or not you want to keep dating him. You are not going to change how he feels about his decease wife. He probably needs longer to mourn her loss from what you wrote. so i would say you need to move on....

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Do women want a man who works alot? Posted: 5/25/2009 5:37:38 PM
I think it depends on the woman. There might be a woman out there that doesn't mind if you are away alot. But lets say you decide you want to be around more then what you usually are. The woman you're with might think this is not what i signed up for and leave. The relationship was working as long as you weren't around but the minute you are around it stops working. I personally want someone who is going to be home. I would fore go the material items to have my significant other home. I'm not materialistic to begin with so that's not even an issue for me. For you it might be trying to find that balance of a relationship and work. I just think you need to be around in order to be in a healthy relationship.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 666 (view)

The one thing you miss most when you are single Posted: 5/23/2009 6:55:13 PM
i'm a snuggler so i would say snuggling.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 178 (view)

ladies, whats the kind of cologne/aftershave do you like best Posted: 5/23/2009 6:30:27 PM
Polo drives me crazy!

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 50 (view)

Trump has regained my respect. Posted: 5/23/2009 6:28:14 PM
trump is a rich idiot who needs to get a hair cut!

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 43 (view)

What is your ultimate dessert, snack ? Posted: 5/23/2009 6:23:58 PM
ultimate dessert would be homemade oreo cheesecake! Just give me a glass of milk and the cheesecake although the calorie intake prevents me from eating more then one serving!

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 124 (view)

G 20 who thinks Obama's gonna make everything worse ? Posted: 5/23/2009 6:18:02 PM
Lets not forget who got us to the state we are currently in! that would be President Bush! Bush has left a mess for President Obama to clean up! Not to mention President Obama did not vote for this war. What about all the money that is being spent on this war and for what? So our soliders can die over there?! This war is just like Vietnam. Haven't enough people died? What are we really accomplishing over there? And where is the government's support when our soliders come home?! I am against the war and it needs to end. The money that is being used for the war needs to be invested in other projects. We have our own to take care and need to stop getting into everyone else's business! Or do you perhaps have an issue with him because he is African American? He is the best thing that has happened to this country in years!

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 348 (view)

Is it wrong to report / turn in illegal Aliens Posted: 5/23/2009 6:09:08 PM
i've got news for you some of the illegal aliens that are coming into the country are coming here to try and have a better life. Have you ever asked someone who is here illegally what their life was like where they came from? and aren't we descendants from immigrants? I know they may be here illegally but all some of them want is a better life. i had to call immigration one time, it was work related, and quite frankly immigration doesn't care about illegal aliens unless they are breaking the law.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 59 (view)

Teen girls useing Welfare to have babies Posted: 5/23/2009 6:00:17 PM
i highly doubt teenage girls are saying to themselves "geezs i want to have a baby so i can get welfare!" Some teenagers want a baby because they want someone to love them or because their friends are having babies and they don't want to be left out. If teenage girls are having babies because they want someone to love them what does that say about our society and parenting skills? Maybe as a society parents need to pay more attention to their children instead of working so hard to provide them with material things that are not necessary. They need to have their basic needs meet and part of that is a parent being emotionally available to their children. Not to mention if you cut families off from welfare and they have no education and can't get a job the children are the ones who are going to suffer and do you really want that? They'll be more children going into foster care because of neglect concerns. They have no food, clothing or the electric gets shut off. Maybe what needs to happen is the "system" needs to be changed so people are successful on getting off welfare. I worked at homeless shelter many years ago and there were no requirements to being homeless in order to get into the shelter. They now have requirements and i am assuming the reason they changed it was 1. for funding reasons and 2. people were not being successful in keeping a home and would become homeless again. Not to mention some of the individuals on welfare may have mental health issues, drug addiction issues, been abused as children, and have no family support. So be careful not to judge someone else's life if you have not walked in their shoes.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Good qualities you look in a person plus strong chemistry-is it enought to commit? Posted: 4/6/2009 3:37:05 PM
but isnt that why you would want to settle down with this person because you are in love with them and you don't want anyone else to be with them....if you dont get giddy inside when you are around this person or excited to see them then why are you with them? something is not right then and that person needs to figure it out because settling for someone is a waste of time for you and the person you are involved with and besides the person that you are involved with deserves to be with someone who loves them and is not settling....

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 43 (view)

Is it too much to expect a level playing field? Posted: 4/6/2009 3:28:47 PM
well did you ever think she may already be involved with someone and that is the person she is living with? Is her picture on here for everyone to see? if its not and she is not giving you her phone number she may already be involved. just something to think about.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 486 (view)

Why do men do the diappearing act? Posted: 4/6/2009 3:24:16 PM
i think its because they find someone else they are interested in. i had someone do this to me. we went out had a good time and had possible plans on another day and i was too tired that night from work and i had told him that night might not work because of work and when i told him i just wanted to go home and not out, he disappeared until about a month ago and asked me what happened and why i never got back to him...clearly things did not work out with the other woman he was interested in. i have also found that people on dating sites are more flighty in that they disappear.

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 34 (view)

Have you ever met someone at the grocery store? Posted: 4/6/2009 3:16:31 PM
i havent but i have a cute story to tell about a coworker. i worked at a grocery store when i was younger and there was a coworker of mine who started dating a guy who came into the grocery store all the time. He would come in and go into her check out line. they started dating and eventually got married. they were married on regis and kathy lee show back in the day when they would pay for a wedding-im not sure if they still do that but they were on tv! their whole story was told on tv so yes its possible to meet someone at the grocery store!

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

Is desparation a turn-off? Posted: 4/6/2009 3:11:07 PM
desparation could be a sign that you don't like being by yourself. a person may also may make a poor choice in a partner if they are desparate because they so badly want someone in their life. are you sure desparate is that right word you want to use here? If a man is pursing a woman i would take that to mean they are interested in them but i guess the question is then how is he pursing? is he calling too much, wanting to know where she is all the time or wanting to see her everyday? so make sure desparate is the word you want to use here....

bratt1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 100 (view)

What do you think about a first date at the cemetery? Posted: 4/6/2009 3:05:24 PM
well if you would have done it around halloween i wouldn't think it to be as odd...what was the reasoning for going there? i think its a little odd.

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 62 (view)

Sex on 2nd date - now what, exclusivity? Posted: 4/3/2009 1:18:53 PM
you really need to get updated on dating rules... the newest "rules" that i am aware of is there is supposed to be no sex for 90 days. during those 90 days you get to know the person and decide if they are someone you would like to be exclusive with. at the end of the 90 days you decide if you want to continue with the relationship and be exclusive or just move on because you are not right for each other. if you are really looking for a meaningful relationship maybe you should try this...because sex is not getting to know a person...sex is exactly what it is sex. sex does not buy exclusivity rights although i think alot of women think that. so maybe you should decide what you really want to do first.

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 9 (view)

Who pays for date number 2? Posted: 4/3/2009 1:12:49 PM
you should be paying for all dates until you are exclusive...

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 54 (view)

What is the best way to get out of a bad date and turn people down who hit on you? Posted: 3/11/2009 1:15:03 PM
you could do the classic i have to go to the bathroom and have someone call you when you get back to the dinner and say someone in the family is sick or your kids are sick if you have them. i would think alot of people use that one now since everyone has a cell phone nowadays.

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 103 (view)

Question for the ladies about texting Posted: 3/4/2009 10:40:57 PM
i agree that it can be a good way to avoid emotional attachment but i also think its a way someone can talk to multiple people at once. with a phone conversation there has to be more effort and you have to stay focused on what you are talking about with texting you can be doing that and be on the computer at the same time talking to people. its beneficial for those out there that are players!

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 424 (view)

Would you date someone who is separated? Posted: 3/3/2009 4:44:50 PM
if you want to be friends that's fine but honestly how do you know he is really separated from his wife and they aren't getting back together? do yourself a favor and either just be friends or run...because until he has those divorce papers he's a married man and its your heart on the line not his!

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 24 (view)

Dating someone who is adopted...any experiences? Posted: 3/3/2009 4:41:43 PM
just because he didn't seek out his birth parents does not mean there is something wrong with him...did you ask if it was a private adoption of through a county agency due to abuse and neglect? that is a big difference. maybe you should do some research on adoption to educate yourself more about it...some kids who are adopted have problems and others do not...

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 161 (view)

Americans Are Spoiled: A Depression will do us good! Posted: 3/3/2009 4:35:25 PM
i guess i will get reamed out for this but i agree with rockenro. do i want people to loose their jobs no...but i think we as a society have completely forgotten what is important in life and have become an overly materialistic and rude. i've seen these shows like the "real housewives of new york" really? Are they really the real housewives of new york? i have been appauled by the season where they were down south and the woman spent $6000 on shoes! i worked as a social worker that would go into homes where the kids had no toys to play with or no beds and this woman is spending $6000 on shoes! ARe you kidding me?! i worked with a homeless family once who called me and said we don't have any food for the weekend and they were staying in a hotel and her kids were in jeopardy of being put into foster care so i got her some food at a food bank and then spent $25 of my own money to get her some food to get her through the weekend. do you know she cried because i bought her a six pack of soda because that was such a treat for them (everything worked out for this family and they were able to secure housing but that's not my point) and this real house wife spends $6000 on shoes!!!! Now you tell me who has their priorities out of order! ARe expensive shoes really that important in the scheme of things?

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 47 (view)

Should I expect a thank you after paying for the meal, etc.? Posted: 3/3/2009 4:16:22 PM
if they aren't saying thank you then they are just rude...they should be saying thank you whether or not they like you..maybe you should try going out with women who aren't so wealthy, they maybe more appreciative of what you have to offer. Not to mention if you are just meeting to see if things click you really shouldn't be spending alot of money on the first meeting..it should be something simple-that's my opionion at least other women may differ with what i am saying and you might want to be careful that they aren't just after your wallet!

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 41 (view)

3 weeks of fun,30 txts a day then nothing. Posted: 3/3/2009 4:08:17 PM
honestly, you shouldn't told her cat to ** off...how does she know you aren't going to treat her like that if you are saying it to her cat? pets are a big deal for some people and if you don't treat their pets right you may be out the door! while other people will get rid of their pet for their significant other...it works both ways. think twice before saying ** off to someone's pet...i think that is the real reason she ditched you bud.

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 13 (view)

trusting your gut... Posted: 3/3/2009 10:26:44 AM
i had something similar happen to me where i was engaged to the guy and he never broke up with the girl he was seeing before me and i knew something was wrong and i wanted the proof before i did anything...i eventually got the proof that i didn't really want because i wanted to be wrong but it was not only this girl but he was talking to other women on the internet and had met with the one women twice from what she told me....talk about trust issues! the only thing i can tell you is to allow some time to be by yourself first before dating anyone and then take things slow...i feel like you almost have to have a dating check list or a dating application now a days because dating is sooo difficult and it shouldn't be. and listen to your gut...there might have been signs there that you missed because you didn't want to believe it...i didn't want to believe it because i never thought he would have done anything like that and it certainly is not your fault and that is not what i am trying to convey...i'm a big book reader and there's a book by gavin de becker called the gift of fear and it talks about women ignoring their gut instinct and why they do that but you have to follow your gut and that's what i do even when my friend's advice differs because i am not looking to go through that again!

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 1452 (view)

so, why are you still single? Posted: 3/3/2009 10:17:51 AM
i thinks its because back in the day at 35 you were supposed to be married and have kids and if you weren't they'd consider you an old maid...but times have changed but not necessarily that mentality...back in 99 i went on a bus trip by myself, but you end up hanging out with all the people on the tour group. there was an elderly couple who had their grand-daughter with them and the grandmother could not believe i would go on such a trip by myself! so what am i supposed to do sit at home and wait for a guy to take me somewhere! i don't think so....at the end of the trip she said good for you for going by yourself but through out the trip i kept hearing i can't believe you went by yourself! that's just like my grandparents-my pop-pop was the one who drove, my nana never got her liscense and when he passed away she pretty much walked everywhere or had my aunt's come take her places...i don't feel there is anything wrong with it i just don't think society is used to independent women...

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 96 (view)

What do you make of a man who disappears then reappears? Posted: 3/2/2009 5:46:24 AM
well i would be curious as to what you think he is trying to do. But given that you met him on a dating site my thoughts would be he met someone else on here that he was into more and then she either dumped him or he ended up not liking her so its back to plan B. You should really find out if this guy likes to be by himself or not because he may just be with someone so he's not alone until the right person comes along...

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 206 (view)

Why do MEN love BITCHES ? Posted: 2/24/2009 11:56:57 AM
there is actually a book out called why men love **es by sherry argov-great book! but it wasn't about women really being **es but about women being confident in who they are and being assertive. men don't like clingy needy women...

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 108 (view)

Would you follow your partner if they wanted to sell it all and join a cult? Posted: 2/23/2009 9:01:17 AM
uh no! if they want to join a cult they have some serious issues and i would be saying good-bye to them!

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 217 (view)

Getting even or holding a grudge... which would you do? Posted: 2/23/2009 8:57:18 AM
well whats the pay off to you? holding a grudge takes engery to do and really doesn't accomplish anything...and getting even is pretty much the same...i have a person i would like to have gotten even with but it would have accomplished nothing and i wouldn't stoop to their level and besides aren't we out of high school? we should be acting like adults..of course our feelings get hurt but is doing either really going to make you feel better?

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 21 (view)

how much time Posted: 2/18/2009 1:16:46 PM
well it does depend on the two people involved...i don't think you want to be glued at the hip but if you just started dating you should be seeing each other once or twice a week...

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 89 (view)

ladies, how much older would you date? Posted: 2/18/2009 10:55:32 AM
i try to stay in my age range...i'm sorry but i don't want to date someone who is old enough to be my father...that gives me the creeps!

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 39 (view)

I'll Take Mr. Wrong! Posted: 2/18/2009 10:53:41 AM
If you would date or be involved with the wrong person just so you aren't alone -clearly you need to be alone and need to work on why you are uncomfortable being alone. a person needs to be comfortable being by themselves before they get into a relationship. If you don't like being alone then you may make an unhealthy choice in a partner and do you really want that? Dont you deserve someone who will treat you right and with respect and why would you settle for anything less? you don't want to be in a relationship out of a "need" you want to be in one because you "want" to be with that person...

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 11 (view)

Will he make time for me? Posted: 2/18/2009 10:40:47 AM
well have you suggested meeting him? If you haven't suggested your not going to know...and he may be fine with the way things are if he hasn't asked to meet you. i think if you are interested in someone you'll make time for them and if you don't you'll loose them...

brat1972

Joined: 9/3/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

what do u think? Posted: 2/16/2009 8:08:20 PM
jm0405, im not in a relationship with this guy...if you read the post you would see that after the third outing he jumped ship...i just wanted people's opionions on whether i was right about what my gut was saying....

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