can masterbating the wrong way affect having sex with a woman? chat & forums.

Posted In Forum:

Home

MyForums

Show ALL Forums

Author

Thread: can masterbating the wrong way affect having sex with a woman?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 12 (view)

can masterbating the wrong way affect having sex with a woman? Posted: 1/17/2006 7:50:55 AM
The only advise I ever got, was to not get a hard on and run full speed into a brick wall.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 7 (view)

casual recreational sex versus meaningful intimate experience Posted: 1/17/2006 7:47:39 AM
I would say that is kind of like bowling. Except you don't have to rent the shoes. And you definitily don't want to be throwing your balls so hard that it's knocking over your pin. But yeah, kinda like bowling.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 35 (view)

Could you say NO to sex Posted: 1/17/2006 7:21:34 AM
What is this sex thing that you speak of? And why is it that you would be saying no to it?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 284 (view)

Whats the best way to ask your g/f for a blowjob Posted: 1/17/2006 7:15:59 AM
Just tell her, "If it's not you doing it now, it'll just be someone else tonight..."

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 26 (view)

Meeting someone online just for sex? Posted: 1/16/2006 12:57:36 PM
Yeah, the NorthWest was great, but I'd much rather set up camp in the warm moist valleys of the Southern region.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 24 (view)

Meeting someone online just for sex? Posted: 1/16/2006 12:54:01 PM
So, you are like Lewis and Clark? Or was that their names?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 280 (view)

Whats the best way to ask your g/f for a blowjob Posted: 1/16/2006 12:21:24 PM
In a deep, scary, southern dawl, you say: "You sure got a purty mouth"

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

Meeting someone online just for sex? Posted: 1/16/2006 12:03:48 PM
Oh yes, I do it all the time. Especially on Thursday's, I enjoy meeting up with various people for meaningless sex. There is a 2 for 1 discount, for couples. See, Melly and I are in competition. Well, not so much a competition as it is a slaughter (you don't play fair Melly). But I too do this all the time (ok, I try to). But I'm set up on Wednesday, that's hump day you know. And were as a 2 for 1 discount wouldn't work too much for me, I have to offer a 1 for a 2 payment after 8:00 a.m., and a 1 for 3 payment for those after 12:00 p.m. Couples, get a payment of regular price, per person, and a rain check for a later date (which includes me having to pay on that session also). So, Melly.... I'm up to 4. I'm catching up to you!!!!!!

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 38 (view)

How To: Make Your Own Sex Toys!!!! Posted: 1/13/2006 1:02:30 PM
no note pad needed. Highlight, copy, paste into a Word document, hit print. Then put disk in and hit save as "Another Lonely Night Recipies".

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 83 (view)

Reply To #1 part duex Posted: 1/13/2006 1:00:30 PM
Hey!!!! I happen to like sardines..... Does that make me a freak?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 80 (view)

Sick question, but i gotto ask! Posted: 1/13/2006 12:52:01 PM
Eddie Murphy: You can smell it....

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 78 (view)

Sick question, but i gotto ask! Posted: 1/13/2006 12:47:50 PM
People should have know that a smell like this would never die. Or is it that a smell like this is like something that died. Ahh, who cares, smell on thread, smell on!!!!!

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 25 (view)

when is the right time? Posted: 1/13/2006 12:27:06 PM
sure you could. Do you need some batteries?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 6 (view)

when is the right time? Posted: 1/13/2006 12:11:04 PM
You may have waited a month, but I'm willing to bet he had you before the first date. Men's imaginations are something eles!!!!!

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 59 (view)

Sick question, but i gotto ask! Posted: 1/13/2006 11:40:47 AM
Sorry, just got the name General Custard stuck in my head!!!!!

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 88 (view)

Dont you hate running out of batteries?? Posted: 1/13/2006 11:26:01 AM
I'm sorry, I didn't HEAR anything. I read some stupid a$$ sh!t that you wrote though. But none the less, I'm done trying to explain it to you. I might have better luck with this brick wall over here.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 55 (view)

Sick question, but i gotto ask! Posted: 1/13/2006 11:16:48 AM
You think your uncircumcised dealybobbers don't stink?? Fromunda cheese..ewww I'm circumcised Your furry little butts don't get dingle berry's??? I shave my ass and wipe four more times after I know it's already clean. Then follow up with a wet wipe. You think that stuff that shoots out tastes like vanilla pudding?? Huh? Huh? It doesn't? Wow, I always kinda thought it did. Look like it would anyway.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 48 (view)

Sick question, but i gotto ask! Posted: 1/13/2006 10:52:48 AM
Isn't that what started this whole thing?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 32 (view)

Male Strippers Posted: 1/13/2006 10:51:54 AM
I apologize for the attire everybody, but I'm trying to live healthier. Dentist said I should floss more. "bu-dum-paa-tissh"

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 43 (view)

Sick question, but i gotto ask! Posted: 1/13/2006 10:47:25 AM
this thread will NOT die on my watch!!!!!

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 29 (view)

Male Strippers Posted: 1/13/2006 10:45:11 AM
Pablo, see my post on page one. I already beat you to it. LOL, I dont like sandals much on men.. but as long as he is not wearing a Thong You do know that they use to call flip-flops thongs; right?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 19 (view)

Tips to drive him crazy Posted: 1/13/2006 10:37:40 AM
sweetie, you have to realize that the majority of the people that post here are comedians in training. If nothing else, there is nothing funnier to joke about than sex. And with all the free information that there is on how to please on the internet, just about everything asked here is toyed with. Combine that with the vagueness of your question, you get the responses that you have seen. How can we give you tips on what he will like when we don't know what he is into, or what you are willing to do or not do. My best advice to you is to research different techniques and scenario’s and then talk it over with him. Then mix it up and randomly surprise him with some of it. Or better yet, all of it. Good luck to you.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 25 (view)

Male Strippers Posted: 1/13/2006 10:32:46 AM
So guys aren't allowed to wear thongs? What about sandals?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 9 (view)

Where is your favorite place to take... Posted: 1/13/2006 10:30:09 AM
I thought facials were done with a cool cream to tighten the skin?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 4 (view)

Where is your favorite place to take... Posted: 1/13/2006 10:08:05 AM
There was this one time when I went to Mexico...... but I'm trying to forget about it.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 8 (view)

getting your white wings do you have them?? Posted: 1/13/2006 9:49:43 AM
[QUOTE]thats true but thats cum Is it ok for her to get it in her mouth? If so, then my reply is: "but thats cum" So what's your point?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

Tips to drive him crazy Posted: 1/13/2006 9:39:55 AM
yep, that'll just about do it!!!!

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 34 (view)

Sick question, but i gotto ask! Posted: 1/13/2006 9:27:38 AM
See now I was under the belief that woman liked the taste and smell of a guy's nuts that had been sweating and farting all day. Huh, go figure.....

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 24 (view)

Sick question, but i gotto ask! Posted: 1/13/2006 9:09:47 AM
Similar situation, had a girl that I pulled the fingers out and had this thick white stuff on them. Kind of looked like tapiocca pudding. Wasn't grey mind you, but at that point, it wouldn't have mattered if it was black, or pin-stripped. That was as far as this guy was going with that one.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 20 (view)

Sick question, but i gotto ask! Posted: 1/13/2006 9:01:38 AM
yep, I'll have the salmon please.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 86 (view)

Dont you hate running out of batteries?? Posted: 1/13/2006 8:56:02 AM
Any man that hasn't experienced having a silver bullet strapped to his pecker underneath a cok ring, while pleasing his woman, hasn't lived.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

Male Strippers Posted: 1/13/2006 8:49:05 AM
That's the difference. Men go to strip clubs and sit there watching like watching surgical proceedure on the Medical channel. Women go to strip clubs and laugh, make noise, and particapate. Women seriously have much more fun.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 22 (view)

do you do this ? Posted: 1/13/2006 8:42:06 AM
If you're smart you make it all part of foreplay.Like putting the finger in and offering her a lick.Her facial reaction will tell you what you need to know. OMG, I can't belive I never thought to do that!!!!!

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 10 (view)

Male Strippers Posted: 1/13/2006 8:35:21 AM
Took a girlfriend to a strip show once. Thought it would get her going, if you know what I mean. And sure enough, on the way home, she was talking about how she was going to wear me out!!!! Then we get home, I get all kinds of naked and ready to go. She takes one look at me and says: "Never mind, I think I'm just going to go to sleep, I'm tired". Late Night Cinamax was on, so it's all good.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 7 (view)

Male Strippers Posted: 1/13/2006 8:26:53 AM
I use to be a male stripper. Well, it was more of a comedy act, but I digress..... Seriously, I use to be a stripper though. We refinished funiture. Man those fumes....

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 15 (view)

do you do this ? Posted: 1/13/2006 8:04:12 AM
Just don't get caught sniffing after the scratch, then either shaking or nodding your head.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 83 (view)

Dont you hate running out of batteries?? Posted: 1/13/2006 7:41:00 AM
OH, OH, that's it exactly!!!!! You've got me pegged!!!! Don't need it to get the job done, I just have no issues with using everything available. Same sex over and over, even if great sex, gets old. But I guess you wouldn't know that. I'm guessing you haven't been with any woman that long. Problably not with that many either. But why am I arguing with you. You seem to have it all figured out. So, good luck to you Mr. Got It All, Don't Need An Open Mind. Seems to be working out for you pretty good there, seeing as you are on POF.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

is sex without dating healthy in t he 2000ands? Posted: 1/13/2006 7:25:23 AM
Ahhh, a ton of fun..... Sorry, no disrespect to ya.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 80 (view)

Dont you hate running out of batteries?? Posted: 1/13/2006 7:18:16 AM
Ahhh, now I'm all tingly inside!!!!!

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 78 (view)

Dont you hate running out of batteries?? Posted: 1/13/2006 7:07:47 AM
I would love to know where you get your infinite knowledge of what "normal" women want? And what's up with this fascination with wanting to know if my cok gets hard? But since you insist on knowing, I shall inform you. My cok is very well trained. I can tell it to get up, and it gets up. I can tell it to thump, and it thumps. The only trick that I haven't mastered yet, is telling to relax. Why would a woman want a toy over the real thing? I don't think a woman really does what a toy OVER the real thing. The real question here is why wouldn't you want to go to every length possible to make your woman happy? If she said you're great, but I would love it so much more if you'd spread cheese on my ass and eat it off with a cracker, you're saying that you wouldn't, just because you, the all mighty shorn should be enough without the cheese? Come on partner, sex isn't about what you can do for them, it's about what you can do for each other. About sharing the experience and exploring. And another good reason to have one, unless your d!ck vibrates, is that they VIBRATE. Wouldn't you rather crawl into your bed with your bf rather than a toy? Like I said before, it's not about rather than. But I don't think there is a woman in this thread that wouldn't opt for both over either one individually.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 58 (view)

How do you find a guy that can actually be the dominant one? Posted: 1/12/2006 3:37:36 PM
and f*ck you however you like. doesn't that defeat the purpose of a dominate one?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 72 (view)

Dont you hate running out of batteries?? Posted: 1/12/2006 3:31:41 PM
I'm sorry, I'm retracting my statements. I cannot believe that I allowed this jack-ass to get me all wrapped up in an argument. I tell ya, I have such a short fuse when it comes to closed minded ignorant people. Let me spell that out for ya, ignorant does not mean stupid, it means unaware. You have every right to feel the way you want to feel, as do I. And for jumping all over you, I apologize. But seriously, you really shouldn't come on here and start slandering people like that. It's just plain rude.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 69 (view)

Dont you hate running out of batteries?? Posted: 1/12/2006 3:27:32 PM
Your going to make some woman real happy there chief. In between beating her and making her cook your slop and raise you 12 kids in that cramped up trailer. And how would you know about my tiny penis? You been looking in my window you homo in denial?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 64 (view)

Dont you hate running out of batteries?? Posted: 1/12/2006 3:18:43 PM
Ladies?!?!?! Do you want to rip into him, or shall I? FREAK!!!!! Go boink your goat and quit thrashing people with that small closed mind of yours. It's really not a fair fight.

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 62 (view)

Dont you hate running out of batteries?? Posted: 1/12/2006 3:13:38 PM
Because we have the real things.. What, a bowl of Jello and some Saran Wrap?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

Potential New Mate knows your F*ck Buddy....... Posted: 1/12/2006 2:23:01 PM
They are going golfing together? Would that be a scrimmage match then?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 30 (view)

Creepy? or Sexy? Posted: 1/12/2006 2:21:19 PM
#1: Women in boxer shorts and black crew socks: --Isn't she suppose be naked? #2: Women in Y-Fronts (tighty-whities) and black crew socks? ---Isn't she suppose be naked? #3: Men in boxers and socks? --Aren't I suppose to be naked? #4: Men in Y-Fronts and socks? --Aren't I suppose to be naked? #5: Women in a thong and socks? --Isn't she suppose be naked? #6: Men in a thong and socks? -- Aren't I suppose to be naked?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

is sex without dating healthy in t he 2000ands? Posted: 1/12/2006 2:17:21 PM
I've had tons of sex outside dating in the past. I don't feel guilty about it. So you had sex with 4 really fat girls?

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 26 (view)

is there is any link between breast nipples and sex? Posted: 1/12/2006 2:09:14 PM
YOU WILL RESPECT MY AREOLA!!!! sorry, I'm a Cartman fan.....

ru-serious

Joined: 10/12/2005

Msg: 37 (view)

what is pillow talk? Posted: 1/12/2006 1:58:03 PM
pillow talk is when you talk about the fact that her pillow is what is being used to dispose of his cum.

Show ALL Forums