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little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 404 (view)

California women: fact or myth? Posted: 10/2/2008 10:54:34 AM
Spent the weekend volunteering for kids and met some very special men and women who happen to be from CA..changed my perspective. There are good people everywhere just have to look in the right place. Doesn't mean people are running off into sunset with a soul mate(some have) but it does mean people are out there who truly care about others.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 400 (view)

California women: fact or myth? Posted: 8/30/2008 10:20:42 AM
It does get you somewhere in line..probably the front at first. It can be helpful or it can be dangerous it depends on the person who happens to have it. Money comes and goes. You don't take it with you. It isn't the defining picture. Who you are and who you chose to be is the only real thing. Did you support a charity? Give to kids? or were you buying weak minded people? As to gold probably better right now then money.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 397 (view)

California women: fact or myth? Posted: 8/29/2008 8:59:49 PM
lol funny..that line

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 395 (view)

California women: fact or myth? Posted: 8/29/2008 8:48:40 PM
Whether you live in the country or the city..you choose who your going to be. How you present yourself to the world is up to you. How you treat others is up to you. If your a gold-digger you may find yourself with a guy who treats you like a thing. (You might later find yourself sleeping with the pool boy or the tennis instructor. )This is fine if you and he agree on this. You choose your lifestyle. As does he...who probably has his proverbial red sportscar in the driveway a younger wife/mistress or both or divorced from first wife and marries mistress..we all know that one...so in this scenario you get what you get and you don't throw a fit. Like the man said..in all cities, countries, villages, towns one can always find the village idiot or the gold digging gamine..or the usually older man who thinks he is able to buy people..and to some degree he is right..they just need to find each other. Wherever they live. We all choose who we will be.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 393 (view)

California women: fact or myth? Posted: 8/27/2008 8:13:02 PM
Its not us born and raised "California girls" that are the snobby, gold-digging twats, its these other girls that move here. mmmm okay. Your just the girls who diss other girls and then use the word twat in a sentence...but at least you did not use the other word.. I feel I must respond as I was a person who moved here...rather my parents did when I was younger. I was born in Texas. Raised in California with school in MO. I feel I chose the best things memories, places the things I liked the best.that those states represented and applied them to my personality. The thing about California is its a melting pot. Lots of different types represented. You get what you choose to get. I would also venture to guess some might not want to change.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 335 (view)

Lying about ages Posted: 8/27/2008 10:06:26 AM
Geezer it does seem strange the need to call out VGE and make an example..okay well thanks I am really glad to know the research has been done and body fat is 15, no 18, no??? I forgot because oh yah its completely irrelevant. Who cares?? If I was going to kiss a girl..like the song it would be VGE. This is about lying. In regards to your casting the net with some untruths.. to get what you feel you needed.Whatever, to each his own. But things usually come back around in some way. How long have you been married? Were there any other lies?? Usually a foundation built on lies is pretty shaky..As we are all responsible for what we put out there online and into the world..I would watch the rock throwing and the glass house that you have built...

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 377 (view)

California women: fact or myth? Posted: 8/17/2008 10:47:17 AM
Actually there are farms everywhere where one might find some chicks.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 1315 (view)

older women younger men Posted: 8/12/2008 7:02:05 PM
You surely would if you lived in closer..your profile made me smile and lol...normally this might be too young for me...but a sense of humor is very attractive. Downright sexy..

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 1313 (view)

older women younger men Posted: 8/11/2008 6:28:06 PM
Or you could have just said to her first/second question...neither, I like you. That is what you said opening line.. You like who you like..and that is fine. To the lady who is 41 dating 31...so what?? That is okay. Why do you feel he should be with someone more supple?? He likes you. Maybe he finds something about you that he connects with and he finds you special..like double choc mentioned...he just likes you. Date people who make you happy and you connect with..who cares how old they are. Might become great friends..might have a brother/sister/friend or perhaps this person is the one... 100 or 21...

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 1286 (view)

older women younger men Posted: 8/6/2008 6:36:49 PM
If you want to be used for sex then go ahead but you'll never be satisified. I never was. I agree. Yet I am pretty sure a man who is like this..a player or a user basically a selfish person is just like this. Age has nothing really to do with charachter. Have it or you don't. Have met/talked to men who act like this when they are 30, 40, 50. So I suppose one might decide to just pretty much be open to dating a guy who treats you as you deserve or feel you deserve to be treated.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 1267 (view)

older women younger men Posted: 7/19/2008 2:08:24 PM
Kind of crass. Not terribly romantic and not terribly classy.. However old he/she is there must be a connection, respect, common interests. I prefer class over stud-liness any day. Have dated older and younger there are good things about both and sometimes there are not so good things..for me somethings are better left to the locker room as guys will be guys but I don't want to hear about your ideas of womens sex organs..especially if your looking to date the organ bearer. In general just saying..no woman I know would think that is romantic or classy. However old you are. Consenting adults nothing wrong..that would have been enough.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3458 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 7/1/2008 9:33:38 AM
I have dated off and on. Sometimes I have to take breaks. Retreats. One of my friends who happens to be male, I met here. He thinks I should at least be having a physical relationship he has volunteered. I am just looking for something more special. I mean I could go to a bar for that kind of thing and p/u some younger man. Without any regrets..its just not my deal. That would not bring me what I seek. Probably would regret that kind of thing...for myself I analyze things too much. How it would affect me later.. will I come away feeling good or bad about myself sometimes its exhausting. John I heard what your saying and agree mostly. I dated someone four years ago?? HE left after 6 mos and said if it was just me it would have been different. Crazy, it was never just me. He knew that from the get go. I did learn somethings though from that relationship. Luckily my babies were babies and we did not get attached. (it did hurt my feelings for a time but he was kind of selfish and in time I got to know that) .I learned that it was possible we could attached and hurt and I took note for the future. I did have one funny date where he got down on his hands and knees and started doing push ups in front of me and my family..to show us his strength and then he yelled at me for not being into him...it was funny. I will never forget and I intend to use it as material. I have a couple of more but I have been more to myself the last couple of years. Nothing wrong with me(not the greatest cook) I just know what I want and don't want to hurt anyone or pay for a sitter when I know its just not there. Takes a lot of work sometimes and sometimes its just too much for a dinner and great albeit conversation. I do have friends though..some of them would like to benefit me or vice versa..I think I am just too sensitive romantic thinker type of person for that...sometimes I wish I could. Just go for it..but that is just not me. I do get lonely sometimes but I will bide my time.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3437 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/29/2008 6:47:28 PM
MsQ your so right.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3432 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/29/2008 11:49:11 AM
No he is on the highway to hell when he is a user abuser liar with no moral compass. That was what I believe was being said. Karma really. Be careful how you do unto others..it will come back if not in this lifetime..then perhaps another. Of course here is another windmill and baiter...I am going to go wash my hair.. Happy Sunday people enjoy it.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3430 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/29/2008 11:40:55 AM
To me personally the fashions from the 40's 50's was great..I am not so sure I would want to live in Mayberry, however. In fact I think being a single mother I might have been bruised from more stones then, then now. There were many examples that those times were not as perfect as one thinks..things were hidden from public view..all was not as it seemed. Teaching our children and leading by example seems right. You create your own happiness for yourself and your children...you don't have to go back to mayberry to teach them it can be done wherever you are if your willing. As to knocking a bully to his knees or preaching to the choir or tilting at windmills...sometimes they leave and go to spew there hatred elsewhere..when they see they are not getting what they want out of here.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3427 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/29/2008 11:18:10 AM
Does this include getting knocked up, not getting child support, and the father not playing a role in the kids life? (not always the case as I know) I was married. Got a divorce while pregnant. Had a baby chose to forgo child support and chose to not have the father in our lives..I knew it would be difficult. I knew men may judge me out of hand..choose not to date me. I also knew it was more important for me personally to do what I needed to do and what felt right for my family. I believe for us I did the right thing. There are people who may judge me but they haven't walked in my heels/high-tops..they have no idea. So for this one I am not dismayed. I feel when the time is right it will happen. Til then enjoy the moments that are there right now. I don't feel dismayed. I don't feel like there is not a right guy out there. I don't feel a stranger out there would know my type. The only type someone here would know about me is that I am a mother. There is more to me just like there is more to all of you then what is shared here. I don't feel as if I am a high risk. To me high risk would be someone who might drink too much, party too much, sleep with a slew of women/men. Someone who needs to feel wanted by the opposite sex at any cost. I enjoy the attention from men would feel bad if they stopped looking. I also know I am more then they might bargain for..this example like in a store or something when I am alone. IT is what it is. Sometimes its funny and sometimes it is sad...they have no idea of my type until I choose to share...all of my type(S) that make me who I am. Just like you all. Male or female we are more then an outer shell and we are more then what one might see here...or in the store or dmv or wherever. I like other mothers here have priorities straight. I am a mother and a father.. actually truth be told I am better at wrestling, sports and playing then I am at cooking...(keep seeing this mentioned) I have g/f's who are better cooks then I am. I applaud them but we all have something and everyone is a unique individual with there own strengths and weaknesses. * Bob says: We can only try and discuss if open to change great, though many a convert may encounter that same type of user and fall back if he doesn't change his selection process. * It did seem like a few pages back we might have all come to a greater understanding..Real thought provoking conversation. A deeper look at the people who have been here for a time. A better appreciation of what others have gone through and why they feel the way they do. Then a few pop-ins came in and back again we are to defending ourselves and others..I understand what your saying. I really do. Suppose in regards to one poster..who I mostly disagreed with I am more emotional or feeling then he is. So I vented, I guess..

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3423 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/29/2008 10:17:20 AM
I wanted to defend her too. Bit harsh and extreme her posting but really that guy had no business telling her how to raise her child and telling her who she might be like in her bedroom. He was out to hate and bate. I do feel I have an idea of what he might be like in the bedroom however... I can almost hear the cheer..I am number one! I am number one! Then a belch perhaps and a snore. Classy? Passionate? Romantic? Sexy? Someone deep? I am thinking no not so much. Yes Bob it is perhaps wrong to let your gag reflex kick in. Anger at injustice take over..but I do see our frequent male posters( who I am not hating on,they do sometimes make valid points in all fairness ..but) sticking up for some of these obvious hater baiters and self-professed I sleep with whatever I can get, liar to women. The number one guys who shout there mantras and bang there chests...just as I cringe when I see a mother cursing like a sailor (no harm meant to sailors just a saying)..don't you guys honestly cringe at some of this stuff these guys are putting out there??

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 350 (view)

California women: fact or myth? Posted: 6/28/2008 8:19:21 PM
Its not just women that have the monopoly on being self absorbed and living above there means in LA have met/seen guys as well. Not all people but some just have this mentality. Kind of silly to lay this all on one door step.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3402 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/28/2008 8:10:40 PM
Really classy guys...I feel like I am missing out on quite the catches...yuck and gross. Seems like the only thing one might catch would be a trip to a clinic or something. Single mother or single woman doubt anyone would find trashiness and non selective behavior attractive...unless your into that kind of thing. Some people are. We all get what we are looking for.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3360 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/27/2008 12:03:05 PM
In the early stages of dating(even with canadian laws and your experiences) this is the time one finds out the motives of another. In the early stages of dating I would imagine at least for myself I would not be going into a LTR nor decide to marry or live in with them. When the red flags arise or even knock you in the head is when you should listen to your intuition. I have made the mistake of ignoring it and now I have learned that it is a gift. We each have within us this gift. Listen because it is there no matter how "good" another person is at deception. My ex once told me if he had told me the truth about his past and him in general I might not have married him. Not sure about that as when the red flags were flying I at that time in my life ignored them. Everything happens for a reason in my opinion and I bear him no hatred. I just learned to listen and not ignore these signs for future. Another thing he said to me was that he taught me to not be so trusting in others. Not really true for me. I do listen to my intuition but decided I was not going to change my personality or trustful nature and become bitter because of one guy. That is just not who I am. Opening myself up for slams or judging of others here I suppose but I am trying to show another side to this. In this relationship I became responsible for half of his monetary mistakes. In the US it works like that whether your male or female. I ran his business which was in a male dominated area until everything was paid off and clients had there jobs finished and the threat of suit was over. Then I folded it and got out. I did learn for myself that I was stronger then I knew. Physically mentally and emotionally. I also learned I like the fact that I am a trusting person. Not everyone deserves to be looked at as a someone out to get you type. I listen to intuition but I am not looking at every man or woman who crosses my path as a jerk until he/she shows me that they are. People usually show there true self at some point. Like simm mentioned a coin has two sides. We live and we learn. It is when one doesn't learn the lessons life has for us we are destined to repeat it. (no offense John but maybe you keep finding these women because your still learning this) I would never have known what I was capable of if I did not have the harsh lesson of this relationship. It was painful and it was hard but I grew as a person. Let people show you what they are made of as they will for good or for bad. Just don't rush things. Let time heal all wounds and let time tell about another persons motives.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 100 (view)

Sperm Donor Must Pay Child Support Posted: 6/26/2008 6:05:54 PM
So out of curiosity what would happen if some child got very sick and needed to know family history? What would happen if the only blood type that would match happened to be the donor? What if said child needed a donor for oh I don't know a kidney perhaps? There are more important reasons rather then some guys wallet that they might need to be found. Just saying. I have not given away eggs or received sperm from a bank so I am not really invested personally but there are bigger reasons then have been mentioned.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3355 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/26/2008 5:58:40 PM
A man or a woman should say no to someone who has less then desirable motives. period..

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3353 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/26/2008 10:58:55 AM
She did not deserve you Bob. Stay true to your heart. Could not imagine you becoming bitter..your wiser then that.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3342 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/25/2008 5:33:13 PM
Or blame Jamie-Lynn Spears or a movie for what really is nothing more than p1ss-poor parenting. It seems the spears girls had some piss poor parenting it would appear. In regards to Time magazine and the rest of the "news" there is always an angle there is always politics involved and just check out who owns it. Only a few newsmen/journalists are willing to tell the whole truth. There is more we aren't told about then what we are told about. Most have there own agenda. Call me a conspiracy theorist. Parents for the most part should keep open communication with tweens and teens. They are going to do dumb things...if they trust you then they will come talk to you before doing something past the point of dumb. Keep up communication. Be trustworthy, lead by example. Don't be afraid to talk about sex..just because you talk about it doesn't mean they will do it. Protection and education should be the first thing handed out in school over daycare centers.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3315 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/24/2008 5:13:03 PM
Just to mention on the pact 17 they are now saying it might have been a hoax...will see. I hope she landed a good one too.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3301 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/23/2008 8:10:13 PM
westpark...twisting my words to what??? What do you gain from that? Nothing. I was not saying women were fragile and all the rest of that nonsense. I wasn't saying how cool men are because they can call each other mangina and vuxter and all that. I was saying I find it more obnoxious and trite when women feel the need to debase other women. Most especially when they say my road is right and yours is wrong. IT is just silly. Who is to say who chose right or who chose wrong. Oh ya no one here. Just in case that needs clarification. As to you personally. I think your a moron for twisting my words. Not because your a man who doesn't like single mothers. Your twisting of my words is moronic and not fair. Yet I am not going to shrink with fear or cry in my soup because you don't like how I express myself. Nor am I going to hate or bait. With your need to call me out and twist my words around to suit your need for what>?? Not entirely sure. Are you trying to be a knighted not?? But either way I will still be happy with my road with my thoughts how women should be supportive of one another...and with my cleavage. We don't always need to agree...ideas are meant to be shared. IT is how you do it and what your motives are that you should be conscious of. jlm said earlier she wanted thoughts on why single dads kept trying to talk to her...I just mentioned that another post might be more befitting. I mean mostly here it is single mothers..with Steve and perhaps a couple of others as the voice to single fatherhood. So kiss mine you vukxter!!..oh yes your right that did feel much better. Perhaps I should take a look at the road. Hostility anger and want to talk about classy lol..nope its really not for me but to each his own.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 274 (view)

Why do women like Jerks Posted: 6/23/2008 11:00:07 AM
It all starts out so romantic and sweet and then seems the transition is a bit harsh. When your transitioning do you tell the women you want to bang her?? Or is it just a mental thought? I am thinking the difference is not so subtle...last I checked I am a woman.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3285 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/23/2008 10:49:50 AM
jlm says: Well yeah I kinda was. If that was not a personal attack on me then what was it? It was a specific response to a specific person. Why not attack him for what he said to me. Ah... guess it is okay when he is in agreement huh. He called me a slut more or less. I called him a moron. Don't like it. Don't care! If you are going to make personal attacks then don't expect me to be nice. I missed that someone called you a slut. I don't feel that is fair. I don't know you and whomever said that doesn't either. From my perspective it seems through your posts you don't like kids or single mothers. That was the feeling I got from your posts..there have been other posters here who happen to be male where I got that same feeling. They are not interested in dating me and that is okay too because I am not looking for them either. It was the tone and your not the only one who feels this way. I just feel it is even more insulting when a woman attacks another woman. Women have got be better at supporting each other rather then feeling there is competition to be had. It rubs me the wrong way when I see women attacking each other or disrespecting each other. Even more so then when a man does it to a woman. Through history we have discovered women have made leaps and bounds for progress. There is alot more to gain. When they stop competing for attention ripping each other and pull the claws in and be supportive of one another. Women working together instead of against. We might find common ground. Even though the choices and decisions are on different paths no one has the right to say another chose the wrong path. It is just wrong. A joke is a joke...this thread needs lightning up sometimes and there is only so much back and forth one can take without throwing one in ...really.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3268 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/22/2008 10:33:41 AM
Everyone has the right to date who they want. No one here is denying that. When you call people morons, idiots, uncouth with no class and who did it all wrong..give me a break. Baiting and hating. From your posts, I found your not into children in fact it came across like you don't like them. I was just agreeing with you that you should not date a man who has them. Just like in the reverse single dads and the women who aren't interested(another post where your words might be a better fit..I mean they are asking you specifically. We weren't.) As far you putting them into the closet it was a joke(hopefully you really would not do that) In fact as a reminder this post is asking the question why single men don't LIKE single mothers. Not asking about dating at all. It just happened to turn into that. Who is the "knaught" in shining armor now?? Are the bells ringing??? That too a joke..just in case. This isn't a hate fest. Like who you will. Date who you want. Just don't pretend like your better then someone else.We all have a purpose. No one has the right to judge another. Most especially when you haven't walked a mile in the shoes/heels /fins/ whatever . To me ignorance is ignorance whether college educated or not. No one here called you names. Yet you seemed to do that with almost every post. While at the same time reminding us all how rational and reasonable you are. A class act..uh huh. Smuggler agrees with you and yet I don't recall him name calling the women here(might be wrong)names. Judging out of turn..though there has been a man battle of some kind ..not sure how that one got started.. Someone mentioned adoption for those young girls who made a dumb pact I agree. There was a time when the young girls wanted to be like paris hilton(gag) or l.lohan now it appears jamie spears is the it girl. Someone else will come along and hopefully she will be more worthy of emulation.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3254 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/21/2008 6:29:44 PM
jlm I am wondering also as to why your gracing us with your presence? Maybe you should find the posts re:single fathers and dating..this one is about the mothers. I might even suggest there appears to be resentment towards the fairer sex and not men who have children at all. No one here acted like they were a superstar of life. Respect and admiration for others doesn't make you any less then..it is not a competition. I also want to agree with you that it comes across as if it would be a better life for you not to date someone with children. I would be afraid if I was that kid. Not that you were going to take my dads love away from me but that you might shut me up in a closet or something. There have been a couple of people here who might have found there second half.. YEAH! PS. I love the history channel and don't feel in the least like I should apologize for it. NEVER!!

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3202 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/20/2008 8:02:44 PM
Im not excusing the inexcusable behavior of their Male counterparts... it takes two to tango... That is it??? I think that was a whole two sentences. I don't understand why(though at times well written) you vent and lash out at mothers/girls/ women who yes made a life changing decision that affects more then just one person. Those guys are as much to blame as the women but as we can see in the post the women are usually the ones who get blamed or judged for everything. Luckily for at least most of the women here on this post we have succeeded in being independent non-judgmental and have grown to understand some is not all whether your referring to a man or a woman. I am proud of single moms who are doing it all. I blame spears family and hollywood for making somethings that would be difficult for the average girl/woman to do and making it look like a party or a fashion statement. Not a true reality. IT is hard work. It is rewarding and sometimes a stranger on the internet can be insulting or judge you out of hand. The reality is though no one can judge you but yourself your God or in the herefter when one might be asked what you did with your life and how you handled the challenges that you were faced with.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3184 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/20/2008 4:35:09 PM
They made a pact and it was a dumb one. They were looking for something they don't seem to have. Unconditional love. Period. However it might come romantic or parental or whatever. They were looking. Went to the wrong place to find it and now they are going to have to live with there choices as will the innocent children who will now be brought to the planet. Where were the parents and friends?? What about the guys? I have heard at least one was a grown man..all of it was a sad choice. Those guys are as much to blame as the girls. No one is immune to the choices each individual made. Started with a pact but in the end each person will have to be responsible for there own choice. Some will succeed and sadly some will not.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3166 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/20/2008 11:13:59 AM
Actually that high school was in Mass. Pretty sad situation. Problems there because of religious beliefs and birth control. It is sad when young woman make this decision they are looking for unconditional love. Something must be missing at home. They have no idea the consequences of actions. It is sad really. Almost impossible to get into the mind set of the men and women..actually girls and some men wh0 decided this would be a good idea. Only thing I could think of is they are looking for unconditional love almost like a new kitten or dog. Someone to love and who will love them back. What they don't understand is it is totally not the same thing. There life has now changed forever and they made it on a pact. Wonder what has been going on at home. Too young and to make this decision.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 261 (view)

Why do women like Jerks Posted: 6/19/2008 7:14:45 PM
So the moral of that story is: If all of the NICE guys would quit hanging out with the JERKS, then all of the jerks would lose their credibility and be seen as the jerks they are. You, being a nice guy, were inadvertently helping his cause by being his roommate/friend. Perfect moral to that story...caboomer girl you hit the nail on the head.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3154 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/19/2008 6:08:05 PM
Everyone has the ability to paint brush-strokes so they can avoid a repeat..there are also those out there who realize all people are not the same. That is the most important lesson one can learn in regards to dating. An open mind. There are flags that come up one either sees or ignores...for me one of them is vulgarity. Crass or obnoxious behavior. Now if I was a man who had been burned by a woman of less then honest traits I would avoid women like her. It would not be because she was a mother it would be because her character traits were less then endearing. A man should date a single mother if he wants to. I am not in the business to tell people why they should date me or anyone. John and all men here: you should date people who make you a better man. Date people who bring out the good in you. Just as you have the ability to bring out the good in another woman. Become friends with people because you like and who knows where this leads? Maybe you end up dating them. Maybe they end up dating your friend. In the end it is not fair to judge others, period. We all have a purpose. We are all here to learn. We are all here to live our lives in the best way we can. One can learn from mistakes and that is not a bad thing. IT is when you don't learn that you repeat it here or in the after. My family and I are whole as we are. If one day a man steps into our family it will be because it was meant to be. He would be loved and treasured. Not because of his wallet or(darn I forgot what else I am supposed to be chasing him for..) but because he is incredible to me and mine. We all fell in love. Til then I have good guy friends. Like brothers. Some men I have dated and they have become brothers. The thing we understand about each other is that even though we are not intimately involved we have become friends care about each other. Feel each is deserving of someone who is right for that person. Judge not lest ye be judged. Throwing rocks at glass houses. All of these old as dirt sayings are tried and true ...that is why they are as old as time. I don't feel the need to berate (acknowledge) a guy who calls himself mangina nor do I get anything in a twist when someone comes to flame/ incite sadness or anger. In the whole scheme of things while I disagree and part of me gets irritated..would I really be interested in dating this person anyways? Do I need to get ruffled feathers because someone I would not even find to my liking doesn't like me? Because I am a mother? No not so much. Goodnight all and sweet dreams.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3141 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/19/2008 12:30:59 PM
Parkerkimm, I think most of that quote has been talked about in one way or another. Maybe the ladies will comment on it, their choice. Much of it is sterotyping and myths. When you look at the profiles of this group of moms I think 85% would not apply. My thoughts anyway. It is his personal choice..to date or not..whatever. As for the derogatory blanket statements there just lame..no reason to even acknowledge them. Just a guy out there who feels the need to berate or condemn or judge..he is not part of my world so personally I am not so vested in his opinion..one mans opinion and truthfully he sounds like its a possibility he might have been burned by a woman who happened to be a mother...or perhaps its his own mother he is upset with. One can never really know about another person until you know them. There is light and there is darkness..Good and bad and the in between.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3076 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/18/2008 9:21:12 AM
Just to dispel any confusion or misunderstanding, here is the answer to the original question. That is your answer. Not THE answer. It is even too lame to copy and paste and start this whole thing over again..at least for me. This single mother of the world honestly and directly could care less about this so called truth that is hard to take and that comes from a guy who is vulgar.(your own words to describe yourself) My judgment tells me there are men and there are morons just as the same can be said for women. Direct honest and straightforward from a woman who refuses to date vulgar, selfish, ignorant men...regardless of his parenthood. If he is someone who hasn't evolved, if he is selfish(terrible lovers they make), if he looks at his body and sees something different then I do. Truth of the matter is you have no idea what choices and reason an individual makes and why. Be in charge of your own life and leave the judging to a higher power. Most assuredly you are not it. Mostly though it is a good thing we (single mothers)are spared from even being interested in dating someone like this. Your truth is not hard to take..really not interested in dating anyone like you anyways. As a woman( with or without kids) I would imagine a vulgar fish is not that fabulous nor that great a catch.. I would throw him back and find better bait.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 252 (view)

Why do women like Jerks Posted: 6/17/2008 10:26:19 AM
I think your roomate sounds gross and dirty. My first thought about him would be testing. My second would be...how many people are you willling to sleep with to sleep with him? IT would be a fleeting one, possibly. I doubt I would think he is as hot as you seem to think but anyways... This guy is going to get a disease if he doesn't have one already. There is nothing sexy about that. To treat his own body and someones else's so casually to treat others's feelings so poorly acting as if he were some kind of master player...he will be sorry later perhaps when he is alone and he only has memories and medication to keep him company. Not judging him but just saying.... He won't always be all" that" unless he takes better care of himslef and others. Maybe would be better for him to think of master of kharma rather then master player...don't be jealous..be grateful.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 246 (view)

Why do women like Jerks Posted: 6/16/2008 11:29:54 AM
Well brother I have got to say the only saddle I have is the one in my closet along with my pirate outfit. This woman for sure would be bored to tears with a predictable man. Boring doesn't have to go with treating well..in fact I would venture to say this borders on mental abuse. I wonder who might appreciate this little sum up...just saying what I feel needs to be said. ;) Happy Monday

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 243 (view)

Why do women like Jerks Posted: 6/15/2008 11:33:04 AM
In California the women don't have much of a choice. It does seem that way at times. Not always but more then the fair share so to speak. I once had a man tell me that women liked to be treated a little bit bad. I could kind of tell where he might think this for some reason as it happens. I could also tell that for me I did not want to date or be committed to him. Not into that at all.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 3063 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/11/2008 7:51:11 PM
Right on Bob way to close this out. Fair and balanced. We are all human and deserving of love. Peace and good night friends..

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

A Complete Change? Posted: 6/11/2008 11:05:14 AM
As far as having a hundred bucks in pocket and making a change letting go of the past and striving forward to the future..I admire your determination. I don't think your dumb. Brave actually. I need to plan as well as be brave.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 13 (view)

A Complete Change? Posted: 6/11/2008 10:59:09 AM
Thank you everyone. I really appreciate all the different views. From a kids perspective to a grown up one. There were really some good things to think about. Everyone in the family has to be included in the decision. Good research and feeling out the energy. As far as being accepted in a possible locals only environment I have a good life track record in that dept. I am a nice person and people can see that. Not tooting own horn I have things/issues to work out too. (terrible housekeeper). Acceptance once strangers talk to me isn't there for me. Feel blessed that way. I did love Washington it was beautiful there alot of visuals that inspire me and I feel my pen flowing. I also came to find out by the local people there that it rains alot and the sun came out for my week visit. Actually to be honest I was on a road trip with an ex boy-friend and the people of washington state and the beautiful surroundings treated me better then he did. He was okay. Not abusive or anything. Just not for me. A bit cheap a bit self absorbed but road trips are good for that kind of thing...I digress.. sorry. Another post. Hawaii was amazing. The garden isle. I only have concerns about the education for kids. We were very much accepted there and felt love from the people as well as the place. A writers paradise. Italy or Spain. I really want to see. Under the Tuscan sun whatever that movie title was I could see that with me. Most of the European moms and dads who I know from kids' school originally have thought I was not an american. Thought I was European. Not sure if it was mentality or looks or a combo of both. As to wanting to escape I know that feeling and this is not that. Wise decisions and real plans. My family and I deserve a well thought out plan. Thank you all for your thoughts. Very inspiring and thoughtful. It seems like certain places can do something for the spirit energize it so to speak. Certain places inspire me. I do write more and it seems to come more effortlessly. I Don't want to be accused of being a hippy dippy..though have been called that here at pof before. Could be worse. As to taking them away from anyone like a dad..I don't have that to contend with. They would like one and I also (a right one not a stand in) but we are not any less a family for not having a man in the house as they understand. We are whole. The choice is ours alone. Weather would play apart for me. I get cold.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

A Complete Change? Posted: 6/10/2008 12:06:57 PM
Have you ever thought of just packing up your kids and your boxes and moving? Did you do it? Where did you go?City to country or vice versa? Is there a secret town out there that is financially friendly as well as great for kids? A place where the elderly are cares for and valued? Not put to pasture?( when there expiration date expires in the thinking of some people) Where respect comes from doing not just having money? I Want to give my kids a wii but I also want them to have there values in the right place. I want them to place more value on trees and the beauty of nature over the latest new gadget. That is fun but it is not real/ breathing. They love animals and nature and climbing and they are still sweet. Haven't been materialistically exposed too much. But this year it began and I am thinking my values aren't conducive to my or their LA living situation. So instead of driving what would happen if I opened the door? What would I see? Clean air, bright stars trees flowers animals with trips to city for fun and attention when the need arises. Any thoughts? Any single mothers have any ideas or success stories? Any single dads(band together on an island someplace) Have any? Maybe a lodge group of cute dads? *Better amend island reference...more like peter pan and lost boys over polygamy

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 2835 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/5/2008 5:49:26 PM
Jess not all men are bad as neither are the mothers who bore them. But wait I am thinking maybe might have found a girl version..j and j.? Some is not all. Many types of people represented on this planet. Some men here bob and steve seem to have head and err balls in the right place. Fair and balanced.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 2786 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 6/4/2008 7:46:36 PM
Hey anyone remember rivergirl/disney mom / whatever? I remember her. She seemed like a cool lady to me.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 2589 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 5/31/2008 5:42:56 PM
I am a giver....so I am choosing to be with a giver...geesh do I really need to point that out John??? You should know that by now...I mean we have all been here for 100 plus threads. I stay the same. Thanks looney for not ripping

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 2579 (view)

Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers? Posted: 5/31/2008 10:33:32 AM
To me this is an endless and sometimes silly thread. Bottom line a person male or female with or without kids gets to choose who they are going to be. What type of person they are going to show the world. There are takers and there are givers. Period. Some men and some women are also choosing to be doormats. To each his/her own. The bottom line is some people choose to do unto others and there are people who choose to do unto themselves. For me I would rather date a giver. Better lover, better friend, remembers how to be a kid at heart. Oh yes and I am still not wondering why a guy might not want to date me or may not like me...I don't care. There are plenty of people out there who will. They might become my good friend or perhaps they might become more. These are the people I am interested in. It is curious to me how this becomes such a black and white issue for some. But to each his own. Bottom line is we choose who we will be. WE choose who we let into our lives who is going to bring me up instead of down. Who is going to match with me. IT is the man not the title he may carry. I am bigger then my label of single mother.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 249 (view)

Lying about ages Posted: 5/25/2008 9:54:46 AM
Grannies who are spring chickens rock! I am going to be like that. I enjoy spending my time with these spring chickens and have learned many things from true history to fashion to skin and great at crossword puzzles. As to pants since women come in all different shapes and sizes (Thank God for that)there are different pants that look better on different types of women. If your wife has not found them for herself how romantic it might be if you bought them for her and asked her to model them for you. The guy was attracted to wife's body before so enhancing the right parts..there is no lie. There is only what is true. I just meet people and am not focused on there age so much as who they are for real. I am attracted to a handsome man but if there is no depth then it is just kind of superficial and not really relationship material. Might be fine for a dance but not a lifetime of dancing. Lying is lame no matter how old you are. Somethings like the boss or a spirited granny once can dance around so to speak. Truth sprinkled with tact and class and mostly love should not hurt people.

little_mermaid

Joined: 10/16/2005

Msg: 238 (view)

Lying about ages Posted: 5/24/2008 1:37:51 PM
Happy Birthday to me...and then some. I can't believe I've been here on/off for this long. (Earlier pages of this post). Single still. By choice I suppose but still. Not lying yet about my age but also not announcing it wherever I go. Sometimes my g'f's do but I take that as a compliment as they are a. either giving me props or b. feel the need to remind me I am older then they are. In which case, somehow I threaten them. Must be doing somethig right. That is a sad statement about what is treasurable. I have met men with wallets but it doesn't mean anything unless with that comes charachter traits which are in tune with me. Humanitarians. Charitable men. I have also met women who would be deemed beautiful by just looking at them. Yet when you look inside it is a very shallow pool. Sometimes are selfish or rude expecting something of people as there due because of there butt or flawless face. I feel well preserved(funny word to use) like a mason jar or something. Sometimes have found that being a visual for some people has not always worked in my favor. Depends on the moment.

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