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Thread: I'm not into overweight women, am I a jerk?

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 139 (view)

I'm not into overweight women, am I a jerk? Posted: 4/16/2007 5:58:34 AM
Your overgeneralization that overweight individuals do not care about themselves and their health is bordering on Jerk-land. You can not profess to know how anyone else thinks or feels about their individual situation, so you can't say with a straight face that this person or that person "doesn't respect themselves". How do you know what they think or feel? That point was covered. What's next? I am a little anoyed at the folks (particularly women) who make this oberservation. I'm paraphrasing and exagerating for comedic effect but here is the gist of the statement: "Hey, you should like to date overweight women, because hey you know, if you date a skiny gal and she gets sick, or has kids, she may become overweight, and then you have a heavy girl anyway, nyah nyah. " (The "nyah nyah" I added for comedic effect because I see them saying this in their head to our friend joe the OP as they type these kind of staments in their posts). These are the same women who will defend any woman's right to discriminate a dating canidate based on some superficial trait such as height. Yet, the guy who doesn't date the overweight girl is shallow, and the girl who doesn't date the guy three inches shorter then her is "just exercising her right to have a preference". Me senses a double standard here... I hate double standards. Ok, you want to know what the differnece is here? Except for those with medical problems or genetic predispositions, with alot of work, and perhaps the help of a dietician, you can get yourself in decent shape over time. Will you have the body of a a model? Probably not, but its in some select cases possible. Can a guy grow three inches in height? Not unless he's wearing platform shoes. See my point? So the next time someone wants to blast a weight preference guy, think carefully, are you a height preference gal? Then you have no moral authority to blast the weight preference guy. For the record, I find so much beautify in women of all shapes and sizes. Sexy is on the inside in my view, but I just wanted to point out the hypocrisy of some folk in this thread and nip it in the bud. Jaberwokey has spoken.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 131 (view)

Why Do Women Do Stupid Things During Breakups??? Posted: 2/16/2007 1:41:49 PM
[Sinbad said] If the man were the one letting himself into her house and doing all those things, most women here would call him a stalker and claim for the police to be called. I suppose commiting felonies is OK, if the felon is a woman and the victim is an ex-boyfriend. "Your honor, I destroyed his property but you know, like, I was mad at him, so you can't blame me." Well said! I'm sick of the "you just need to understand how they feel, and what their frame of mind was because of the hurt they felt" defense. If I were the judge in that case I'd be like. "Listen here miss. I don't care what your motivations were for commiting the crime. You broke the law. Thats the only fact that matters in this case. How you feel about the plaintiff is irrelavant!"

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 23 (view)

Relationships and....boredom? Posted: 2/16/2007 11:24:10 AM
"I'm bored. I'm just not happy. I don't feel the excitement I used to in our relationship. He/she doesn't thrill me like he used to. Our conversations are boring. He/she doesn't mix things up in the bedroom. He/she doesn't want to go out anymore. He/she doesn't dress nice for me anymore." I've heard all of these things from friends of mine (male and female alike) in relationships. Of course I allways listened and gave them a sympathetic shoulder to cry on. But inside my head I wanted to shout out and say. "Do me a favor and quit your whining! He/she loves you, and is faithfull to you. Count yer fricking blessings! Do you know how many lonely single people there are in this world who would kill to have your life? Shut up and count your blessings for once you ungrateful whiner. So he/she is boring, boo fricking who. At least they are faithfull. At least they want to sleep with you once in a while. Is the cup allways got to be half full with you? Gosh lady/mister get a grip. Yes there may be someone better out there for you.. Guess what? I don't want you to get that someone better because you don't deserve it. You want to know why? YOU DON'T APPRECIATE WHAT YOU GOT ALLREADY. OTHER PEOPLE WHO DON'T HAVE WHAT YOU HAVE SHOULD GET A SHOT. You can't have anymore shots you are out of shots. You want nys strip steak when there are 3rd world people who don't even get warm porriage. You make me sick. Go complain to someone who cares you whinny crybaby. "

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 18 (view)

my x is trying to hook up with my best friend is that right? Posted: 12/22/2006 9:41:45 AM
Dude. The code forbids such a thing. I extend that to say, you should never date anyone in your friend circle especially if you x is in that friend circle. Yes, it sucks because there are girls my x are friends with I would have loved to date, and visa versa, but it keeps things less complicated. My x is also my good friend, and I avoid hitting on her friends because I think how I would feel if she hit on my friends. So yeah, if your bud takes the plunge he's a code violator and needs to get a ticket from the friend police.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 299 (view)

Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash? Posted: 12/6/2006 1:30:22 PM
Yes, eventually I got a really great job and people quickly forgot the harsh words and bad advice they dished out.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 298 (view)

Must have job, car, house...are they after my cash? Posted: 12/6/2006 1:29:41 PM
I am a professional person. I have a bachelor of science degree. I had a great job. Then back in 2003 this little thing called downsizing happened. My entire department was cut. Let me tell you something, its not easy finding another professional job at the pay you used to command if you have to stay in a particular city or region. It took me several months to find another job in my field, and I was pounding the pavement every single day of the week (except sunday). What pissed me off was the crap I got from friends and family, and yes, dates when they learned of my unemployment. "Why don't you just get a temp job?" I was making a lot more on unemployment. It was better to take the unemployment and look for the job I wanted then take a crappy job that would prevent me from looking and interviewing for the job I wanted. But it had a stigma to it. People are such jerks sometimes. Don't judge unless you have walked a mile in my shoes.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 127 (view)

Sex with married men Posted: 12/6/2006 9:34:34 AM
Satan hates cheaters.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 46 (view)

Why Do Women Do Stupid Things During Breakups??? Posted: 12/6/2006 8:33:55 AM
With all due respect to the applogists in here, but revenge is neither defensible or justifiable. You never have the right to seek out your own justice. If you commit a wrong in the name of trying to seek revenge against someone who wronged you then you are just as bad, if not worse, then the person who wronged you. Not only that it doesn't help you deal with the emotional pain. Not really. Only through forgiveness does one ever truely become free of the pain that someone caused by wronging you. I'm not saying you have to be arround someone you dislike, you don't have to be arround that person anymore if you don't want to. Just that you need to forgive them and move on because if you keep the bitterness about whatever they inside you or you act on it with a negative action instead of letting it go it will eventually destroy you. We are human beings, we make mistakes yes, but we are capable of being noble and rising above our impulses because we have intelegence.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 36 (view)

Why Do Women Do Stupid Things During Breakups??? Posted: 12/4/2006 3:00:03 PM
Yes, people have emotions. They can feel betrayed and hurt. Guess what? They still don't have the right to harm other people. They still don't have the right to destroy personal or public property. These poor hurt people still don't have a right to break the law. Being a victim never gives you the right to make someone else a victim, no matter how they made you feel. Taking the moral high ground is not only the right thing to do, in the eyes of the law, it is the ONLY thing to do. Two wrongs don't make a right. Don't do that, and feel free to enjoy the jail time or fines you may incur as a result. Not to mention you will have soiled your diginity and self respect in the name of revenge. Revenge is never "understandable".

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 82 (view)

when did dating become just sex? Posted: 12/4/2006 12:52:50 PM
I have no problem with people hooking up if they are both just looking for that. And I don't have a problem with people doing what they want. But I'm against the practice of using guilt or manipulation to get sex.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 147 (view)

Condoms and Blowjobs Posted: 11/27/2006 7:53:36 AM
Yeah! Virginity is cool. Wish I had kept mine honestly. Virgins kick a***. If you are a virgin, stay that way as long as you want to. Don't let other people preasure you into having sex before you want to. Honestly, despite everything people say. Sex isn't all its cracked up to be. You really aren't missing anything.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 12 (view)

when did dating become just sex? Posted: 11/24/2006 4:36:21 PM
I agree with the original poster. The purpose of dating is to meet new people and find someone you are compatible with. The purpoase of that is to hopefully find your future wife or husband someday. Unfortunately for many dating is seen as a way to get sex. Tsk tsk. A most regretable a point of view to be sure. Too many people thinking with their neither regions and not using their brains.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 145 (view)

Condoms and Blowjobs Posted: 11/21/2006 11:42:20 AM
It amazes me just how stupid and uninformed your average person is about sex and STD's. It amazes me because I seem to recall having sex education in 5th, 7th, 9th and 11th grade. Not to mention the countless informational websites, tv specials, and the like. That many times and yet it doesn't seem to stick in people's brains at all. You can get STD's from any form of unprotected sexual contact. ANY FORM, PERIOD. "But if I trust him/her. " Trust has nothing to do with it! They may not know it themselves! Your feelings of trust aren't going to save you. Treat every partner as a potential disease ridden bio-hazard until you have both been tested and you have seen the lab results, and you know you can trust them to be faithfull to you. I'll wear a condom, and I'll use a dental damm. Hell I'll wear rubber gloves. Anything to be safe. "But it spoils the mood." I guarantee you if you get an STD, it will spoil the mood a hell of a lot worse. "But I trust him." Yeah then he cheats on you with some dirty crack ho, and gets you infected the next time you boink. Is your life worth his stupidty? Men is your life worth your stupdity?

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 123 (view)

Why do women find sex on a first date so weird? Posted: 11/14/2006 7:06:06 AM
but what about not knowing someone's sexual history? What about STDs? Preganacy? Everyone is not seeing that some men like to wait as well for the very same morals/reasons that some women like to wait. Am I the last moral man left on this god forsaken rock ?

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 111 (view)

Why do women find sex on a first date so weird? Posted: 11/13/2006 11:53:21 AM
As I mentioned in my previous post... Why is it so hard for some women to understand that there are guys out there who don't want to jump in bed right away and want to wait until the time is right for both? Why do some women assume that "its not a problem" if they pressure a guy into having sex too early? Have the ahole men who have done this jaded you into doing to men the very thing that was done to you by ahole men looking for just a screw? Two wrongs don't make a right ya know. Attention, Ladies who practice this naughty behavior; please don't let the bad behavior of the men give you license to preassure the nice boy who has caught your eye but isn't looking for just sex into giving you the sex. Turnabout isn't fair play when you apply what one person did to the next person you meet!! Neither gender should be corecing/forcing/manipulating/guilting people into having sex any earlier then they feel comfortable having it. Be it the first date, or date number 50.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 107 (view)

Why do women find sex on a first date so weird? Posted: 11/11/2006 2:13:21 AM
OP: Ever hear of a thing called unwanted pregnancy? How about STDs? Condom use doesn't replace common sense. I'm a guy and I'm against not only having sex on the first date, I'm against having sex until I've felt I know the person and can feel that I fully trust them. Sex is risky business in this day and age, and I'm not going to do it with some girl I just met on POF or at a bar five minutes ago. Just because there is some "chemistry" on a first date (that really shoudl read as mutually attracted, and horny), doesn't replace common sense. First date, thrid date, date number twenty, until I'm comfortable and she's comfortable and we are both ready, it aint gonna happen. Neither sex has the right or privledge to assume or expect sex. I've seen just as many overly horny women pull this crap on guys they liked as I've seen men do it to the ladies. I've seen both sides play the, "if you like me, why won't you sleep with me right now" card. Why? Because I just met you that's why! Maybe I have a right to keep my numbers down because odds are unless it is a good match, one of us is going to loose interest in the other before not too long. If I've known you for a while and we are good together there is a chance for something real, then yes, I'll take the plunge. Otherwise, why take on the risks I just mentioned? I'm not dating to get laid dammit, I can "take care of myself" for my sexual needs, I'm trying to find the woman who will be my future wife, she is out there folks, unfortunatly there is only one proven method to find her, which is go out and date and meet people. I'd rather not have to tell my future Mrs that I've slept with more girls then I can count on both hands fingers and toes. How do I avoid that you think? By not hooking up with every girl I "feel a connection" with after a few hours of meeting them! Also, two other things. Sex is never meaningless to me. The act of sex is intimate for me, and very emotional. I have to have real feelings for that person. I've tried doing it without real feelings for someone, it didn't work for me. I didn't enjoy it durring, and I didn't feel very good about it afterwards. Also sex early in a relationship just screws it up IMHO. I really think you need to be friends first, and lovers second in a relationship. That bond doesn't happen overnight, it takes time to develop and strengthen. Yes, you usually know if you are into someone in the first few minutes of meeting them, but you don't know if you really are going to get along with them in the first few minutes of meeting them. It takes time. It isn't right to manipulate someone into having sex with you just because your horny and into them. If they want to, and you want to great, but if they don't, it isn't right to give them sht about it and try to manipulate them. They aren't rejecting you. Never expect sex. If it happens, it will happen when its ready. Using guilt to get your way just isn't cool. Men, ladies, if you really like them, they are worth waiting for. The question is folks, are you out for a real relationship or just out for a f*k? If the answer is the latter, maybe its best if you didn't go after the folks who aren't out just for a screw.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

Why Can't Woman Be Honest That Their As Bad As Guys Posted: 11/9/2006 5:41:37 AM
An earlier post stated that the sex on a first date thing may be a test to "see what kind of guy the OP was". Hmm.. I have a thought on that concept. Tests in relationships that is. Here is my thoughts... I don't like people who run "tests" in relationships. Have fun, get to know the person you are attracted to, enjoy their company. Why mess things up with little tests to "see what kind of man/woman" they are. Honestly, its just stupid mind game crap that should never be played. I once had a girl ask me prior to going out with me what my "policy on sex on a first date was". I was like "hello you haven't even been out with me yet, why are you asking this?" "Well, I want to know if we have chemistry if I can get yer goodies or not". I told her I don't fool arround on the first date, and if I decide I'm serious about wanting to date them I won't touch them short of a nice good night kiss for the first month. "Oh, good I was just testing you." Great. So the comment about wanting to do me on the first date was just a tease? "Well, no not really, I want you and would have done it one the first date, but obviously your not into that so, now I won't try, but I would have known you were just out to have sex with me then." grumble Ladies, don't test us. We don't like it, and you wouldn't like it if we turned the tables on you!

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

Are women truly more mature than men? Posted: 11/9/2006 5:28:04 AM
Remeber folks, you are only young once, but you can be immature forever!

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 121 (view)

Why is that the most atractive woman have the least intelegence? Posted: 11/7/2006 11:03:39 AM
For every sterotype there are many exceptions that break the mold as it were. I've met many beautiful and intelegent women. Which makes sense. How does appearence have anything to do with intelegence? Does having a nice tan make you better able to solve Calculus equations? However, I do notice that some beautiful women will rely on there picture only to attract men in POF. I've seen a ton of profiles where you have some girl in a hot cheesecak pose, with a profile that consists of. Hey, if you like what you see, messsage me. I get it for initimate encounters. But I see that sort of thing for people who put in their profile "long term" which I don't get. Either they don't have a brain, or they are so hopelessly lazy that they really think a hot picture is going to make up for not posting a real profile. What pisses me off is there are guys dumb enough to send messages to ladies who do that. They are the ones responsible for the double standard. Don't be so desparte dudes. Insist on women having a brain, and making an effort. They expect it from us, so turn the tables on them and expect it from them too!

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 15 (view)

he googles everything I say Posted: 11/1/2006 1:13:38 PM
Allright. I'm tired of women who think guys are supposed to "just know". LOL What's up with that anyway? I'm going to have to google it to find out! =) You are not going to learn anything if you don't research and ask lots of questions. Duh! Do you think we are born knowing how to pair the right wine with the right food? Do you think we automatically know how to be a good lover? Do you think we automatically know how to change a flat tire? We learn by doing, having someone show us, and by looking it up ourselves. But we never "just know". We "just know" how to breath. Thats about it. Everything else we pretty much had to learn. Anyway. The internet is great. Embrace the future OP! The sum off all human knowlege and experience at your fingertips. Yeah! That kicks a***! Why do women allways have to find "something" to find fault with about the guys that are in their lives. Can't they just be happy and appreciate the person they are with for who they are quirks and all? After all I'm sure you are not the model of perfection either ms. Tizzle and yet he loves to be arround ya. So why not cut the boy some slack eh?

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 21 (view)

Democrats: We’re Not Lying, Just Naive Posted: 11/1/2006 7:25:13 AM
When your entire argument consists of a string of reckless, slanderous, untruthfull, meanspirited, and outright disrespectful insults, how exactly are you employing rational debating techniques? Take a chill pill. Seriously. If you expect me or others who don't share the same point of view as you on the war, and on the president's job performance to listen to you, how effective do you think ranting irrational emotional insults bombs is going to be at changing our minds? Does that A, persuade people or B, does it make you look and sound like an a*? If you picked B, you would be correct. Rational debate focuses on the issues. It avoids character judgements and character assasination. Both parties have been guilty of this, but that doesn't mean we need to treat each other that way. The OP did the same thing btw, and I don't condone his hostile tone either. Both sides engage in gross overgenerealization and forget that there are great decent people who serve for both poltical parties. Abe Lincoln was a republican. FDR was a democrat. Yet both were great presidents who served the country well durring very difficult times in american history. The point being you can't make blanket statements saying all democrats are this, or all republicans are that. Can we all at least agree on that? Can we all agree to disagree without the name calling? Just stop with the name calling and overgeneralizations. They don't serve either side. You catch more flies with honey then with ps and vinagar.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 12 (view)

Democrats: We’re Not Lying, Just Naive Posted: 10/31/2006 4:52:09 AM
That is a good point redwood and it is one that the democrat attack dogs like to forget when blasting the president. Everybody thought Saddam had WMD's. I'm still not convienced he didn't have them. Not finding them is not evidence to support them never having existed. He used musterd gas on the Kurds for cryin out loud! But the democrats and the anti-bush crowd are going to forget all of that and say it all started with George W. Bush. Deep down, the democrats don't care about the war, they don't even have a problem with Bush. They have a problem with not being the ones in power. That's it. If Clinton had started this war they wouldn't have any problem with the war. Remember folks opposition to any war from political leaders depends on who is commander in chief. Are those bombs democratic party bombs or republican bombs? And that my friends is the truth of the matter. Neither party has any real principals except the principal of staying in power at all costs period. If the winds says everybody likes option a. Then its option a, if option a starts to become unfavorable, the other side will start to say you should have gone with option b! If option a starts to work again, the the opposition will say "well, we really didn't endorse option b, we really were behind option a. vote for us, we like option a. They are all scumbags. But we love em anyway. Go democracy!

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 21 (view)

Why do some guys think we can't handle it...Double Standards Posted: 10/25/2006 1:22:36 PM
This is why the hippie sixties generation sucked. It's the generation that brought us the lousy moral relativism and anti-labeling movement crap. Never call dating "dating", never call a relationship a "relationship". Cowards.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 63 (view)

Married Women Looking For Sex Posted: 10/6/2006 6:11:44 AM
The "don't judge, you don't know what the situation is or why women or men cheat" posts in this thread really do miss the point don't they? I am not a huge fan of moral relativism. It implies that nobody is supposed to take personal responsibility for their actions. It wants everyone's measuring stick to be different so that nobody can ever be told "Hey, you f&@ked up, now what are you going to do to set things right?" Everything we say, and do impacts the larger world arround us. We have free will, but that free will is has a great deal of power and with great power also comes great responsibility. A person of character will understand the impact that decsions he/she makes has on themselves, friends, family, and the world at large. "Well, Jaberwokey, you don't know the person's sitation, what they went through, what pain they had that may have caused them to cheat." I don't care. You know. It's time people started to understand again that there are things in this life that are positively right and wrong with no grey areas in between. Knowingly cheating /deciveing a spouse that you swore to be emotionaly and sexually faithful to is wrong. Period. The circumstances that led to the decision as to why the man or woman decided to break the sacred oath of marriage is irrelavant. It doesn't protect them from the negative consequences. Nor should it protect them from the disapproval they will likely get from others. Sorry, but you are breaking a sacred oath when you cheat, it says something is seriously wrong with your personal character. I'm supposed to think the cheater is a good guy or lady? How trustworthy a person can they be if they are willing to lie and f#(# arround on their spouse? Are they capable of being a good friend to anybody if they can so easily break sacred oaths of trust? How would you like to do business with a person like that?

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 31 (view)

why be friends w/ ur ex? Posted: 8/12/2006 7:17:13 AM
I'm friends with all of mine. I manage to keep things compartmentalized. It's not allways easy though. It's tough sometimes being arround someone who proclaims how great a friend you are and how much fun you have together. Then you get into this weird area where you have all the previous aspects of your relationship with them (pre-breakup) only now your not intimate anymore with them and you have to deal with some other dork coming into the picture thinking he's going to get his shot at the prize. And what sucks even more is when that other dork does get his shot and it works for them, and you relize the guy is just like you.. only its not you, its this other guy. Then you go, WTF was wrong with me ? Why is this guy so much more special. And usually there really isn't anything special about him at all. He's like you.. just not you. And.. then eventually if you have been friends with this x for years (as I have in some cases), you have to hear about how much of a jerk this guy is now that they are married. Because by this point your x thinks you are her best friend she can say anythng to and that you are cool enough to care about her problems. So you pretend to give a crap, but in the back of your mind you think... "SERVES YOU RIGHT FOR DUMPING ME, HA" Oh and did I forget that the new dork in her life once he relizes that your not a threat and that she's not going to come back to you, he wants to be your best friend too. You just want to punch this guy out, but he wants to be your buddy. Then something even more irritating happens. You start to like HIM as a bud more then her. I'm pretty sick of it actually. Do what I plan to do from now on and tell your X to split after a breakup. BTW.. the scnario above applies if you break up with her too. Leave and don't come back.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 132 (view)

Online Dating Guide for Men: Part Deux Posted: 8/7/2006 5:27:40 PM
I agree. However alot of guys here would say, we don't want waste three months emailing you before meeting you in person and discovering that the email chemistry didn't cross over so well into the "real" world. The point of a dating site is allow you to new meet people and go out on dates. It's not to find a pen pal I can email back and forth with a milllon times an day. Sorry, but dating is a numbers game. So, bring on the numbers. I'm not saying go on a date after one or two emails. But once you get a sense of who they are, if your interested. Take the plunge and go for it. Meet someplace outside of the normal date time. Make it a public place or bring a friend who watches you over at the end of the bar for saftey sake. All I'm saying is if you are here to meet people, do it. Don't tippy toe arround it. Take the plunge. Fear is counterproductive. No guts no glory.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 38 (view)

I don't want games...So sick of that comment Posted: 6/13/2006 7:41:29 PM
And before anyone says "oh he's just bitter he must have had a bad breakup or sonmething". Actually, I'm not bitter at all. I just call em like I see em. Good day.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 37 (view)

I don't want games...So sick of that comment Posted: 6/13/2006 7:37:21 PM
Whomever said it is better to have loved and to lost then not love at all was a board certified a-hole. No games means, not knowingly leading someone on when you have no intention of taking things to the next level when it is obvious that your partner does. It's when you want to keep looking for Mr./Ms. Right, but you selfishly want to hang on to Mr/Ms. Rightnow because you have an inate fear of being alone or a strong narsistic desire to be the center of someone's attention even if you have no intention of staying long term. You keep doing this even though the person you are with is in love with you. You don't care if they are hurt, because its all about you, and you play it up because they are a sucker and you like the fun and the attention.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 475 (view)

Can men and women be friends without sex? Posted: 6/13/2006 11:31:23 AM
Women and men can be friends. However, there are many female friends I've have or have had that if they had wanted to start a relationship, I would have strongly considered it. Why? Good relationships are grounded in good solid friendships. You can't base a relationship on just sex and expect it to be everlasting.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 65 (view)

Guys opinion appreciated Posted: 5/8/2006 9:35:02 PM
FYI: there is nothing wrong with the thrid date boink. It's just I can see why a guy or girl might want to wait if they are really into somebody because of the whole tension/anticipation, wanting to feel in love first thing.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 64 (view)

Guys opinion appreciated Posted: 5/8/2006 9:31:20 PM
Part of the excitement of the "getting to know you phase" of any long term relationship is the sexual tension/anticipation aspect. For example, I'm sure everyone's noticed how much more intense make out sessions are when you haven't had sex yet. The anticipation builds and grows stronger with every date. If you are enjoying getting to know someone, going out on dates, just discovering each other, why not stretch out the ride for a while before going for the main event? Why not let time for love and build up in the courtship so that your first time together actually represents true intimacy instead of just a third date boink?

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 378 (view)

do men actually exist that date women with kids?? Posted: 5/6/2006 9:47:03 AM
here is my take on this issue: I think loveworthyness is an alot like creditworthyness. Positive things improve your score, negative things lower your score. Kids don't really lower the score so much as divorce does. A divorce is just one of those negative things that nags at you. It makes me think. Gee, allready ditched one hubby after having expressed her eternal love for him before God, her family and friends. Does she respect the mariage vows still? Will she respect our vows if things ever go to that level? Thankfully life isn't so black and white. You need to ask followup questions: 1. Did she leave him because she was bored? Ok.. don't get involved with her. 2. Did she leave him because she was cheating on him? Ok... don't get invoved with her. 3. Did she leave him because he was cheating on her? She's ok then, but may have trust issues. 4. Did she leave him because he was abusive? Ok, good for her, but you worry that he may come back and beat the crap out of you in jealous rage. 5. Did she leave him because they "just grew apart" or "he wasn't mature and I had to be the grownup" etc, etc etc. She isn't worth it dude. Marriage vows are too sacred to fall victim to "just grew apart" syndrome. That is so lame when people use that excuse. 6. Did she leave him because "she just wasn't happy, it wasn't him but she just wasn't happy". Again she isn't worth it dude. Damaged goods. Basically any divorce who left for any reason other then the other spouse cheated on them or the spouse was abusive is not worth your time because they don't belive in the mariage vows.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 129 (view)

Why cant women get picked up anymore Posted: 3/7/2006 6:07:24 PM
I think if you try to pick someone up, you migh throw out your back, because some people are really heavy.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 6 (view)

Why Deny And Demand (Women) Posted: 2/14/2006 8:54:43 PM
Many women lie all the time. Honest is a desired trait by both sexes. However both sexes make exceptions/excuses for themselves. It's do as I say don't do as I do. It's just like standards people expect in other's personalities. They want someone strong and yet they are needy. They want someone attractive and yet they are homely. They want someone nice yet they are unkind. They want someone intelectual yet they watch saved by the bell re-runs.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 27 (view)

Smoking after sex Posted: 2/10/2006 11:47:42 AM
If you smoke after sex then your doing it way too fast.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 117 (view)

Valintine's Day alone... Posted: 1/31/2006 12:56:11 PM
I've spent this holiday with someone special. I've spent this holiday alone. Alone sucks, but the bright side is that you save some money.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 117 (view)

Why cant women get picked up anymore Posted: 1/7/2006 8:03:03 PM
if more women would say "he's got a pulse, thats good enough for me" rejection is such a turnoff ya know? :)

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 46 (view)

Low cut top and a little feel Posted: 12/23/2005 10:18:18 AM
First addressing the issue of provocative dressing on dates. There are two kinds of provocative dressers: 1. Cognitive. They know they are dressing sexy and feel a measure of power from the attractiion that generates. 2. Unaware. They are wearing what they are wearing because it was clean and it still fits them. Based on the personality of the person you are spending time with you should be able to tell whether or not they are intentionaly trying to visually blow the mind of you and any other red blooded male within line of sight of her. What sucks is that if you are on a date with type #1 the sexy dressing is done to: a) Empower them. "He won't be able to take his eyes off of me, he's putty in my hands. Muahahahah." b) Test you by making you the guy resist your natural impulse to look. Oh what a jerk, he looked at my boobs. Just because the are almost completely uncovered and poping out doesn't mean he has the right to stare at them. How crude he is for giving into thousands of years of human evolution! Should'nt he be able to turn the 'switch' on and off at MY WHIM? Look me in the eyes when you are talking to me boy, not my tits." The best date I ever had was with a girl who wore a complete sweater vest that covered up everything. Want to know why? It took some of the visual stiumulation out of the situation and allowed me to think with my head, not the other one." Why is that women seem to forget that men are not like them? We are visual creatures, and yes when you dress hot that can fck with our heads. Is that your fault? No. But do you want to have a nice conversation with us, or have us unconscously look at your tits all night. "But if you respect me, you will not look at my tits and treat me like a person. It shouldn't matter how I dress." No it shouldn't, but guess what.. Evolution has made it difficult for us men to comply with such a request. Even when we do, trust me, we are just really good at faking it. Society isn't going to purge evolutionary response out of us. No matter how much you say "men should never equate my appearance to my attitude." Guess what? We do. You can dream of a man who won't, but trust me, he's just lying his a** off, really really well. When you have you tits hanging out something deep and primal inside of us REALLY wants to look at them.. Your never going to take that primal urge away. All you will do is make us pretend it isn't there. Better to dress conservatively on the first and second dates to make sure the guy looks you in the eye and is able to hold a conversation with you without staring or stammering. That is unless you are out to sabotage every dating encounter you have before it has begun.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 25 (view)

On having affairs.... Posted: 12/21/2005 9:47:42 AM
Cheating is bad, period. I think people who enable the cheater to cheat are bad also. It's NOT ok to date/hook up with somebody who you know is in a commited relationship. It's also not cool to hit on somebody who you know is in a committed relationship. It is dishonorable and selfish in the extreme. Keep to the code and no trouble will follow you.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 24 (view)

Do men not know how to please Woman Orally? Posted: 12/20/2005 11:15:29 AM
yeah its like the troll posts about c0ck size or how long a dude can last in the sack , it's all about these dolts pulling the alpha male player bull$hit trying to impress the ladies and disrespect the other guys competing with them for the ladies. "come to me ladies, I'm a sex god, and I have a pecker that most porno stars would kill for." It's so fricking transparent. This is a discussion forum, not a "lets brag about how great I am" forum.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 88 (view)

How long can you last during sex ? Posted: 12/19/2005 3:09:50 PM
the best part of sex for me is the foreplay, kissing, touching and going down on her. I get a smug sense of satisfaction as she rolls her eyes into the back of her head because she came hard. Is that too graphic? Prolly. :)

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 87 (view)

How long can you last during sex ? Posted: 12/19/2005 3:07:15 PM
to the mathothon men: Stop making the rest of us guys look bad. Lie or something dammit. Don't brag about how long you can last, your going to raise the expectations of your average woman to a level that is unrealistic. "I can go for hours". Well, obviously you are either a porn star, or have no feeling in your unit, or have been doing kegal exercises since you were 12 or are some genetic super breed. In any case... keep it quiet will ya. You make the rest of us look bad, and we really want to keep their expectations low. Its better for us all kapish? That way when we do good, they are REALLY happy. Got it? Now... Intercourse sessions for most guys are very quick 2 - 15 minutes on average for the first go. That is why the smart man uses alot of foreplay (passionate kissing, stragtegic kissing, touching, oral, sexy talk, etc). My rule of thumb is take care of her needs before you ever put your thing in her. If she has a mind blowing orgasm before you ever screw, if you go prematurely, she isn't likely to care as much is she? After all, she got hers too. I've learned that by alternating foreplay, oral and manual stimulation in between intercourse sessions, i do just fine. Sure I could be mr. marrathon man, but sex is about each of you enjoying the playtime, not how long you run the play clock. I usually find that after the first orgasm I can go alot longer. But I don't even care about my orgasm, I care about making sure she has one. If I finish early, I know I'm not finished, i still have work to do. Put your partner's needs first and it doesn't matter how long you are able to boink for.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

Looking for some honest comments Posted: 12/16/2005 8:38:53 AM
Clearly stating things just hurts people's feelings. Better to get attention and have to beat it away then no attention. Why is that people only want the "right" attention? It's like a woman who dresses sexy and expects only the "hot guy" to notice and gets pissed that all the average or homely looking guys noticed also. "How dare you stare at me, can't you see I'm too beautiful for you. I didn't dress hot for you, I dressed hot for your buddy the bodybuilder. You, can look at me all day. Ugly guy, don't look at me.. keep your eyes on your drink.. don't you know I control the very light the bounces off of me.. how dare you let my lovelyness enter your eyes!!"

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

I WANT WHAT I WANT: what is your problem with that??? Posted: 12/16/2005 8:13:08 AM
The problem is that in the name of honesty, you are being very rude by pointing out "flaws" in other people that you find undesirable for a mate. Your sin is that you have framed everything in terms of what you want without once taking the time to look at things from another person's point of view. It's time someone educated you. Lets say you were a heavy set woman. You were looking through some profiles and some a*** of a guy posted in his profile. "If your a fat chick please don't email me. " He's just being honest jaberwokey!! Yes, but he is also being a insensitive jerk and an a$$. Statments like the above are insulting and rude. "If your a short guy, don't email me." "If your a white guy, don't email me." "If your a [insert physical/social/economic/race/creed/orgin trait here] , don't email me." You get the idea. It's rude to identify certain groups of people as "undesirable" in your profile. You run the risk of hurting someone's feelings and/or offending them. The last time I checked the point of POF is make friends, and find a mate. If they don't fall into the "mate" category, then who knows, they might be good "friend" material, but since you already insulted them.. hmm.. well, I'm sure they will be rushing to be friends with you eh? And another thing, you want a sure fire way to avoid having to meet or date someone who doesn't fit your criteria? Either read/delete, or send an email like this: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dear [insert name here] , Thank you for your intrest. I regret to inform you that I am not intrested. However, you have many fine qualities that will make someone special very happy someday. Best of luck to you in your search. sincerely, -- Or something like that. You get the idea. Courtesy is sometimes more valuable than brutal honesty.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 147 (view)

do men actually exist that date women with kids?? Posted: 12/9/2005 11:59:56 AM
hmm.. didn't mean to kill this thread...just felt like sounding off a bit... i guess it just touched a nerve when i read the thread... marriage and divorce is treated so casually these days, it makes me sad. ya know? I have a friend who got married about five months ago and is already telling me how she is so unhappy because he's so immature blah blah blah. I wanted to say. "Hey, you picked the guy, you liked him enough to date him and live with him for a full year before tying the knot. You professed your undying love to him three days after you met him. Sorry, I'm not going to let you complain about his obsesive love of vehicles. You knew that before you married him. Not letting you get away with it. Love your husband for who he is, and not who you think he should be. There are people starving in africa, and you have your health, a nice home and a husband that I have on good authority worships the ground you walk on. Shut up and enjoy your life. You don't have it bad and you have no right to complain or wish your husband was anything but who he is.. you picked him as he is. Punchbuggy, no punchbacks sorry. All sales are final."

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 49 (view)

Top Reasons to Be a Conservative Posted: 12/9/2005 9:30:09 AM
Dems and Repubs have both done: * Great things * Really bad things It was two democrat presidents that got us into vietnam and started the deployment of troops there: JFK, and LBJ. The one who got in thrown in his lap and got blamed via revisionist history writers who claimed he "started it": Nixon Nixon did many things, but get the US involved in Nam, we were very much already in nam and soldiers were already getting killed. The difference between him and LBJ is that he did listen to the american people and ordered a withdrawl of troops. (Eventually). Oh yeah, watergate smaughtergate.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 146 (view)

do men actually exist that date women with kids?? Posted: 12/9/2005 9:05:30 AM
I agree with the poster about the "damaged goods" psycology/aspect of dating/marrying someone who has been divorced/separated with or without kids. Its nothing personal, its just that for me, such a person has already proven that they don't understand the meaning of the marriage vows. They have already proven that they will bail when things get tough and they are "just not happy" anymore. They allready have proven that they will not tough it out when times get tough or they get bored. They have proven that they are capable of "falling out of love" with someone and place themselves above everything else. Bottom line is, I'm a flexible giver who belives in the sacredness of marriage vows, I want someone else who is also a flexible giver. If they bailed once, they are capable of bailing again and I can't trust someone who bails for no good reason. I liken it to reviewing a canidate for a job. If their resume identifys them as a job jumper, why would you want to hire them. I respect loyalty. I don't belive in "Just giving things a try". Trial/starter marriages are for people who don't have their sht together. Repeat after me. " It's NOTa good thing to have one, two, three marriages in a lifetime due to divorce, unless your name is Elizabeth Taylor." Widows are entirely different story. I would date a widow, with kids or not with kids. They honored their marriage vows until the end and are therefore honorable. Yes, I know sometimes there are good reasons for divorce. Abusive spouse, Alcoholism and/or drug abuse, infiedelity, a difficult personality that makes it tough to live under the same roof with you, your spouse decides to leave you for good or poorly formed reasons. But I don't buy it when its crap like. "We just grew apart". "I was bored in the relationship and ready to explore new things" "I wasn't sexually attracted to him anymore." "I never liked him and married him for his money." " I didn't love him anymore." "I didn't love him anymore so I cheated on him." "I was embarased by him and my friends though I should leave him." "I just wasn't happy anymore." You know what I say to those kinds of reasons and those kind of people? Shut up. What part of "richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live" didn't you understand? Morons. You want to know ladies why guys are hesitant to get married these days? Because people have no deep held respect for the marriage vows anymore. People bail at the first sign or trouble or unhappiness. Who gets shafted usually? The guy. Child support, Alimony, half of what he owns given to his x. Cut off from the nookie he though he was buying into for life. Dealing with the fact that some other dude is going to eventually walk into his x wife's life and replace him as provider, nookie provider and parental type figure to his kids. Who wants to go through that? Not when divorce is so easy for women (and men) to mentally do these days. Nobody shames you for it anymore. Its accepted by society. Back in our parrents and grandparents generation. Divorce was available, but it was reserved for the people who REALLY couldn't work things out and hollywood stars. Being divorced was not something regular folk wanted to be because society looked down upon you. It wasn't proper. This really forced people to sort of cool their jets and really think things through before filing for divorce. Now being divorced seems to be almost expected, a social status of sorts. The people who get married and stay married for a lifetime because they found a way to keep loving each other and make their marriage work are almost viewed by society as odd balls. My sister teachers at an elementary school and she has commented on how sad it is that over a thrid of her students come from single parrent homes. Sorry folks but that is a sad state of affairs for america. Kids shouldn't have to grow up having dad live across town. I am lucky, I grew up in a family where mom & dad loved each other and stayed together. Yeah, my dad did stuff that pissed my mom off, and she threatened divorce a few times, but thankfully my mother and father were religious folk who viewed marriage as sacred and they allways worked stuff out. They had some rough years, but they came out of it very much in love with each other with a strong marriage. There is something to be said for stubornly sticking with it together even when your "just not happy" because sometimes there are things more important to stand for then your emotions which come and go as they please anyway. Perhaps this makes me a conservative , but so what. Just because a concept has been arround for a while doesn't make it the wrong concept. I'm tired of this new society we live in that focuses on "just how we feel" as being the most important thing. We are in a society that permits and embraces selfishness, and forget that at some point in our history we valued our principals more the we value "how we feel". Dennis Leery said it best with his schtick on happiness. God.. "I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy because my life didn't turn out the way I thought it would." Hey! Join the *ing club, ok!? I thought I was going to be the starting center fielder for the Boston Red Socks. Life sucks, get a ing helmet, allright?! "I'm not happy. I'm not happy." Nobody's happy, ok!? Happiness comes in small doses folks. It's a cigarette, or a chocolate cookie, or a five second orgasm. That's it, ok! You cum, you eat the cookie, you smoke the butt, you go to sleep, you get up in the morning and go to ing work, ok!? That is it! End of ing list! "I'm just not happy." Shut the up, allright? That's the name of my new book, "Shut the Up, by Doctor Denis Leary. A revolutionary new form of therapy." I'm gonna have my patients come in. "Doctor, I.." "Shut the up, next!" "I don't feel so.." "Shut the up, next!" "He made me feel so much better about myself, you know? He just told me to shut the up and nobody had ever told me that before. I feel so much better now." Whining **ing maggots.

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 315 (view)

Say AA and watch them run Posted: 12/5/2005 11:31:02 AM
I read this thread and thought to myself.. and all I can think of is Chris Rock. I'm paraphrasing here.. but he would say.. People allways want credit for stuff they are supposed to do. "I've been clean and sober now for six months." What do you want? A cookie? You are supposed to be clean and sober fool!

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 46 (view)

catch 22 for guys over 30 Posted: 12/2/2005 12:32:49 PM
Judge not, less ye be judged. ;)

Joined: 10/24/2005

Msg: 92 (view)

Age of consent laws:Outdated? Posted: 12/2/2005 9:56:45 AM
I think it should depend on when he turned 18, was he 17 his senior year and turned 18 durring his senior year? I think there should be some kind of exemption then. Consentually boinking someone two and a half years younger then you are doesn't seem to me to be a crime worthy ruining a kids life and putting him away for 25 years. An 18 year old senior in high school is light years different then an 18 year old in college or working full time or serving in the military. I think we should bring the dad up on charges for being an a***. 50 years hard labor!

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