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 Author Thread: What do men REALLY think of bisexual women?
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 146 (view)
 
What do men REALLY think of bisexual women?
Posted: 10/19/2008 5:05:11 PM
mick2521 -
Sorry, incorrectly formatted my reply before. :)


As to the person who made the sweeping statement that female-female is the least likely to cause transmission of VD, I think that depends on what you are comparing. If you compare female-female to male-male on the basis that there is no existing VD in either partner in any of these gender combinations, then the risk of VD is zero in both cases. They are equally free of risk. One is not less safe than the other.


Hi Mick. You are absolutely right, if two healthy adults (no VD) make love, it is completely irrelevant what the sexual combination was (F/F, F/M, M/M). That's why I always recommend all lovers get tested first, regardless of gender combination. If, however, one of two sexual partners is HIV+ (there are other STD's that transmit differently, but my statement was specified regarding HIV viral transmission) then the type of gender combination and the specific types of acts statistically do make a difference. Again, the reason for that difference has to do with the type of physical interaction. Anal sex (and again, I'm not judging anal sex or attributing any right or wrong about it) creates more microscopic lesions (rips and tears) in the flesh, thereby increasing the POTENTIAL for viral transmission compared to either penile/vaginal penetration, or as is very common in F/F sexual relations, no penetration at all (plastic toys, even if shared, not likely to transmit the virus.).
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 145 (view)
 
What do men REALLY think of bisexual women?
Posted: 10/19/2008 5:03:41 PM
mick2521 -
As to the person who made the sweeping statement that female-female is the least likely to cause transmission of VD, I think that depends on what you are comparing. If you compare female-female to male-male on the basis that there is no existing VD in either partner in any of these gender combinations, then the risk of VD is zero in both cases. They are equally free of risk. One is not less safe than the other. [\quote]

Hi Mick. You are absolutely right, if two healthy adults (no VD) make love, it is completely irrelevant what the sexual combination was (F/F, F/M, M/M). That's why I always recommend all lovers get tested first, regardless of gender combination. If, however, one of two sexual partners is HIV+ (there are other STD's that transmit differently, but my statement was specified regarding HIV viral transmission) then the type of gender combination and the specific types of acts statistically do make a difference. Again, the reason for that difference has to do with the type of physical interaction. Anal sex (and again, I'm not judging anal sex or attributing any right or wrong about it) creates more microscopic lesions (rips and tears) in the flesh, thereby increasing the POTENTIAL for viral transmission compared to either penile/vaginal penetration, or as is very common in F/F sexual relations, no penetration at all (plastic toys, even if shared, not likely to transmit the virus.).
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 132 (view)
 
What do men REALLY think of bisexual women?
Posted: 10/14/2008 10:52:25 PM
Mick2521,

Why would you only get tested if you were going to be in threesome with another guy? Diseases don't confine themselves to one gender. If you are going to have a threesome with two chicks, I'd ask for them to be tested too. Women can also spread diseases.


Where the heck did you get that I was suggesting that I would only get tested if it was a MFM and not a FMF relationship. People, for the love of God, learn to read. In case anyone else somehow misinterpreted my position on testing for STDs/HIV, let me make it abundantly clear. When you have sex with someone, male or female, you literally are placing your life into their hands, and I personally recommend testing ALL lovers before indulging in sex. The point I previously made was that F2F was the least likely to transmit STD's, but not impossible, and certainly not saying not to test. Here it is again since you missed it.


Actually, while it IS possible for F/F transmission of STD's, it is the least likely of any other combination (M/F or M/M), particularly for HIV. That is because the penetration of the male creates the greatest risk of tearing the flesh with micro-abrasions of the skin whereas a virus can penetrate. That's one of the primary reasons why anal sex is considered high-risk. I'm not judging anal sex, but that particular orafice wasn't originally designed with such penetration in mind (in as much as anyone can know God's mind), and tends to tear more frequently. Add to that ejaculation from an infected male and you've essentially have the highest rate of viral transmission possible short of shooting up right into your veins with a shared needle.

End story: Woman to woman is the safest combination as far as STD's go. Either way, the best plan is to test first, then play.


Did you catch that last line this time? Are we clear?
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 210 (view)
 
Most Wild Place You Had sex!
Posted: 10/12/2008 2:15:28 PM
Let's see:
1. In a public reading room at college. There was no one else there at the time, but that could have changed at any minute.

2. On the kitchen floor of my girlfriends house with her parents at home.

3. Just off the walking path at a zoo.

4. On top of a mountain.

5. In our neighbors back yard.
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 111 (view)
 
What do men REALLY think of bisexual women?
Posted: 10/12/2008 11:46:00 AM

OneMoreTimeWithFeeling- The only thing about female bi's is that it's a popular male fantasy to have multiple women and hopefully participate, so it's more accepted. Now if you ask the same men if they consider a threesome with another guy, well, the majority ain't going for it because they aren't gay.


It goes beyond just a male fantasy to be with a bisexual woman in a "menage a trois." For one, I've know women for whom this was their fantasy as well. Plus, there is such a thing as polyamory, whereas the dynamic of a triad truly LOVE each other, not just lust for taboo sex. As for your last point, again, not all men are the same. While I am not bisexual myself, I'm not homophobic either, and if my wife/lover was attracted to another man and wanted us both at the same time, because I love her, I would happily indulge her so long as we had all been tested to be free of STD's/HIV. I would only be having sex with her (not him) during that mix, but she would be enjoying us both.

"The Mists of Avalon" depicts King Arthur willinging sharing Guenneviere with Sir Lancelot because he loved them both. I would much rather indulge her fantasies in that way than have her cheat behind my back.
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 158 (view)
 
Only 17% of American (USA) women like giving oral sex?
Posted: 10/11/2008 12:27:10 PM
I guess I've lucked out statistically. In my experience, it's been the other way around, with only about 17% NOT liking it. Probably a little over 25% were extremely eager to indulge. For many people, the mouth and tongue are some of the most sensuous parts of the body.

Going the other way, I've found extremely few women who did not enjoy having me go down on them, and most of those that didn't like it generally had issues with insecurity. For many women, having a guy go down on them is even more intense and likely to have them reach orgasm than penetration. I'll never forget one woman I did that to who clawed my back so hard it bled. I didn't know until after that I had been her first to go down on her. My back stung for awhile, but it was totally worth it!
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 91 (view)
 
What do men REALLY think of bisexual women?
Posted: 10/11/2008 11:52:59 AM
To m_church:
STD's... It's not like girl on girl they can put on a condom now is it? Performing oral sex on a woman is at a much higher risk of getting STD's than you might think...

Actually, while it IS possible for F/F transmission of STS's, it is the least likely of any other combination (M/F or M/M), particularly for HIV. That is because the penetration of the male creates the greatest risk of tearing the flesh with micro-abrasions of the skin whereas a virus can penetrate. That's one of the primary reasons why anal sex is considered high-risk. I'm not judging anal sex, but that particular orafice wasn't originally designed with such penetration in mind (in as much as anyone can know God's mind), and tends to tear more frequently. Add to that ejaculation from an infected male and you've essentially have the highest rate of viral transmission possible short of shooting up right into your veins with a shared needle.

End story: Woman to woman is the safest combination as far as STD's go. Either way, the best plan is to test first, then play.
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
How soon should fantasies be divulged?
Posted: 10/11/2008 11:27:45 AM
I'm curious regarding the general sentiment on this issue. Personally, when I'm meeting someone with whom I'm exploring the possibility of establishing a LTR, I like the pure honesty of being up front with who I am, what I am after in life, and the sexual lifestyle that I am interested in (committed polyamory with polyfidelity). I want them to have the same honesty with me up front, to know what they want out of life, and out of a relationship (sexually and non-sexually). At the same time, although I would like to "lay all the cards on the table" so to speak, there's always the possibility of saying too much too soon and overwhelming a person. What do you folks believe is a good way of balancing being totally honest with someone new and holding back?
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 244 (view)
 
Polyamory
Posted: 10/10/2008 9:17:47 PM
While society continues to debate what constitutes a “family,” and whether or not same-sex couples should have equal rights as one-man-one-woman couples, there seems to be virtually no discussion in the media regarding polyamorous or polygamous families unless they are referring to Mormons or some misogynistic cult. Do bisexual women ever consider the possibility of establishing a LTR that would allow them to enjoy both sexes? And if so, would they be confident enough in their sexual and lifestyle preference to be open about it in public?
I know that some might think that many men are attracted to bisexual women because they’re just thinking just about the possibility that they might have a threesome. But to dismiss it as simply a fantasy belittles the fact that there are people out there that believe in polyamory, the ability to truly LOVE more than one person. This does not make them perverts. On the contrary, they are pragmatic. Some studies show that more that 80% of men cheat in relationships they defined as being 'monogamous' while over 70% of 'monogamous' women cheat. That can be lethal. I would rather know if my wife/lover was attracted to or loved another person, and rather than try to futilely control her to deny her feelings, BECAUSE I loved her, I would rather free her to explore her feelings. Some would argue that would open up the possibility that she would find herself loving another more than me (whether that someone else was male or female). But if I truly loved her, why would I want to prevent her from being with whom she would be happiest? If someone else would make her happier than I could, I would want her to be with them instead of me. The best that I could do is give her every reason to prefer me over all others. Therefore, I should have no fear of her loving another, whether male or female, and I would hope she would want the same for me. Personally, I know that I will LOVE more than one person (women only for me since I'm not bisexual). So, rather than trying to pretend that that is not the case, why not be honest with each other, and create a situation where people are not likely to 'cheat.' Besides, if my wife had a "sister-wife," then she would have additional emotional support to supplement me. Of course, it takes a high level of self-confidence to pursue this kind of polyamourous relationship, but then again, that's not a problem for me. Ladies, if any of this sounds like something you would be interest in exploring, please contact me. :)
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 2 (view)
 
What happened???
Posted: 10/9/2008 10:32:16 PM
Who can say? There are a myriad of possible reasons. Too much alcohol. They had to pee. They had second thoughts. They got scared. They had third, fourth, or fifth thoughts and somehow lost their confidence (and hence their erection). Or maybe he really wasn't into her (pun could be intended). If there was something there for them emotionally to build upon, perhaps they can try again. Or, perhaps it really wasn't worth worrying about one way or the other and your friend should just move on. Next!
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 52 (view)
 
Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 10/9/2008 10:23:19 PM
Try Planned Parenthood. They offer testing very affordably. I know that some people hate the idea of losing spontaneity, but waiting a week or two for test results is far better than getting an unwelcome surprise. My suggestion is that if you think your new relationship has a decent chance of heading in an intimate direction, be honest about your desire to have both of you get those tests "just in case" you decide to get closer. It's unlikely to turn off your prospective lover. On the contrary, they'll start to be thinking of what you'll be doing after those results are in! This might also be a good time to explore the related topics of birth control or what the plan would be if a pregnancy did occur. If they were turned off by the topic, that would definitely seem like a red flag to me.
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 217 (view)
 
Biblical Polygyny
Posted: 10/7/2008 1:20:20 AM
Ben Frankin is certainly a hero of mine, but if that was his argument again polygamy, he was misinterpreting the Bible, Matthew 6:24 "No man can serve two masters." This has nothing to do with with polygamy. Rather, it is literally saying, "No man can serve two masters." (split allegiances) What does the Bible ACTUALLY say about polygamy? Clearly, according to the Bible, God ENCOURAGED and rewarded it with some of the most notable characters within the Bible:
1. Lamech – had 2 wives, Adah and Zillah(mother of Tubal-cain) Genesis 4:19
2. Abram (Abraham) – his wife, Sarai, offered her handmaid, Hagar to Abram. Genesis 16:2
3. Jacob - wives Leah and Rachel (sisters). Rachel also offered her maid, Bilhah Genesis 29:28, 30:4
4. Esau – wives Adah, Aholibamah, Bashemath Genesis 36:2
5. Solomon – 700 wives, 300 concubines I Kings 11:3
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 121 (view)
 
Polygamy
Posted: 10/7/2008 1:10:49 AM
You are clearly misinterpreting the Bible, Matthew 6:24 "No man can serve two masters." This has nothing to do with with polygamy. Rather, it is literally saying, "No man can serve two masters." (split allegiances) What does the Bible ACTUALLY say about polygamy? Clearly, according to the Bible, God ENCOURAGED and rewarded it with some of the most notable characters within the Bible:
1. Lamech – had 2 wives, Adah and Zillah(mother of Tubal-cain) Genesis 4:19
2. Abram (Abraham) – his wife, Sarai, offered her handmaid, Hagar to Abram. Genesis 16:2
3. Jacob - wives Leah and Rachel (sisters). Rachel also offered her maid, Bilhah Genesis 29:28, 30:4
4. Esau – wives Adah, Aholibamah, Bashemath Genesis 36:2
5. Solomon – 700 wives, 300 concubines I Kings 11:3
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 56 (view)
 
What do men REALLY think of bisexual women?
Posted: 10/7/2008 12:57:40 AM
Not all men are threatened by bisexual women, or thinking just about the possibility that they might have a threesome. To dismiss it as simply a fantasy belittles the fact that there are people out there that believe in polyamory, the ability to truly LOVE more than one person. This does not make them perverts. On the contrary, they are pragmatic. Some studies show that more that 80% of men cheat in relationships define as being 'monogamous' while over 70% of 'monogamous' women cheat. That can be lethal. I would rather know if my wife was attracted or loved another person, and rather than try to futily control her to deny her feelings, BECAUSE I loved her, I would rather free her to explore her feelings. Some would argue that would open up the possibility that she would find herself loving another more than me (whether that someone else was male or female). But if I truly loved her, why would I want to prevent her from being with whom she would be happiest? If someone else would make her happier than I could, I would want her to be with them instead of me. The best that I could do is give her every reason to prefer me over all others. Therefore, I should have no fear of her loving another, whether male or female, and I would hope she would want the same for me. Personally, I know that I would LOVE more than one person (women only for me since I'm not bisexual). So, rather than trying to pretend that that is not the case, why not be honest with each other, and create a situation where people are not likely to 'cheat.' Besides, if my wife had a "sister-wife," then she would have additional emotional support to supplement me. Of course, it takes a high level of self-confidence to pursue this kind of polyamourous relationship, but then again, that's not a problem for me. Ladies, if any of this sounds like something you would be interest in exploring, please contact me. :)
 SirPaladin
Joined: 10/3/2008
Msg: 290 (view)
 
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 10/7/2008 12:50:01 AM
Absolutely I would. In fact, that's what I'm looking for. To dismiss it as simply a fantasy belittles the fact that there are people out there that believe in polyamory, the ability to truly LOVE more than one person. This does not make them perverts. On the contrary, they are pragmatic. Some studies show that more that 80% of men cheat in relationships define as being 'monogamous' while over 70% of 'monogamous' women cheat. That can be lethal. I would rather know if my wife was attracted or loved another person, and rather than try to futily control her to deny her feelings, BECAUSE I loved her, I would rather free her to explore her feelings. Some would argue that would open up the possibility that she would find herself loving another more than me (whether that someone else was male or female). But if I truly loved her, why would I want to prevent her from being with whom she would be happiest? If someone else would make her happier than I could, I would want her to be with them instead of me. The best that I could do is give her every reason to prefer me over all others. Therefore, I should have no fear of her loving another, whether male or female, and I would hope she would want the same for me. Personally, I know that I would LOVE more than one person (women only for me since I'm not bisexual). So, rather than trying to pretend that that is not the case, why not be honest with each other, and create a situation where people are not likely to 'cheat.' Besides, if my wife had a "sister-wife," then she would have additional emotional support to supplement me. Of course, it takes a high level of self-confidence to pursue this kind of polyamourous relationship, but then again, that's not a problem for me. Ladies, if any of this sounds like something you would be interest in exploring, please contact me. :)
 
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