Divorced people stating they are 'widowed'because their ex spouse has died, chat & forums.

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Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

Divorced people stating they are 'widowed'because their ex spouse has died, Posted: 1/3/2008 9:05:38 AM
I think you're being picky. We are not on the witness stand here. I'm divorced. Anyone uncomfortable with that doesn't have to contact me. Simple as that.LOL.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

I was wrong Posted: 12/3/2007 8:33:11 AM
You joined a couple of weeks ago and found a life partner?? I wish you all the luck in the world because you are going to need it.LOL. Been there, done that......but NEVER again!! I'm taking my time from now on.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 82 (view)

I think I wish I was fat Posted: 12/2/2007 12:48:32 PM
My question to you is why do you even CARE what people on the online Personals think of you?? Beyond the obvious of wanting to get dates. I've always been naturally slim. I also have a good character (as you mentioned about yourself) and am extremely intelligent and well-educated to boot. .....but there are not that many emails in my Inbox on POF except for all the guys who want sex.......which a woman can get anywhere. I don'tneed to go to all the trouble of posting a pic and Profile for that.LOL. So keep up the good work, take pride in your progress and feeling good about yourself....... and expect people to accept you as you are, whether fat, skinny or in between.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 15 (view)

Insane guy? Posted: 12/2/2007 8:20:11 AM
He probably found another gullible fool to throw his line of BS to. Your Profile says you are 19 years old. Why would you be dating a guy with KIDS?? Your life has barely begun. Please don't throw it away on someone else's responsibilities. That line he's throwing you was in vogue back when I was your age. I would have expected the "modern man" to be a bit more creative.LOL.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 27 (view)

Would you ever get your partners name tattooed on you? Posted: 11/27/2007 2:36:54 PM
I would NEVER get tattoos of any kind. Back when my daughter was 16 she and her friends had their boyfriends' names tattooed on their upper arms. She had to pay over $1000 to get that tattoo removed when she grew up and found it personally disgusting.......to say nothing of having to wear long sleeves to job interviews and in the workplace no matter how hot the weather.....and this was just a small 3 letter tattoo!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

Dinner Date - Who Pays? Posted: 11/26/2007 8:32:45 AM
Here where I live it would have nothing to do with romance.....not in my age group anyway. The person who asks the other one out does the paying. Simple as that. If you asked her to dinner she should not pay any part of the bill . That is your responsibility. If you can't afford the expense then find a cheaper restaurant.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 70 (view)

Boyfriends in prison Posted: 11/25/2007 5:29:45 PM
A life sentence???? What did he do to get that?? There is NO future for you with an inmate serving a life sentence. There has got to be a reason within yourself that is causing you to hide from the real world by "joining" a guy who is locked up for life. I understand that you feel you are abandoning him when he most needs a friend but realistically since there's nothing you can do for him he needs to face that fact.....and you do too.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 174 (view)

Is it really that difficult to find a suitable partner? Posted: 11/25/2007 9:50:09 AM
nzeus: By "illegally" I assume you mean sexually monagomous. That part is fine.....I have no interest in casual sex and wouldn't want my partner to either......much too dangerous physically nowadays. That said, simply being sexually monogmous wouldn't give my partner exclusive right to the "other parts" of my life like financial decisions, where to live, what to buy , etc and all that other BS that so many husbands of my generation were so overbearing about.LOL.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 171 (view)

Is it really that difficult to find a suitable partner? Posted: 11/25/2007 9:00:54 AM
nzues, Msg 170: I was being facetious......and you took me literally.LOL. I was stressing how precious our freedom is to those of us who had to wait so long for it. We married so young back then because marriage was literaly the ONLY career for a woman and the only way to have children who would not be stigmatized. Those of us who lived long enough got the chance to have a REAL life, doing exactly what we please when we please....and I for one won't ever allow myself to become legally bound to a guy again.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 169 (view)

Is it really that difficult to find a suitable partner? Posted: 11/25/2007 8:44:51 AM
To Msg 3: Having married in the 50s I agree that most of what you say is accurate.....EXCEPT....when No- Fault divorce entered the picture in the mid seventies we women all rushed to our divorce lawyers as fast as our legs would carry us. We "50s women" joined the 70s at 40 and considered ourselves lucky we had a second chance at freedom for we had lived the "old way' far too long. I attended my 50th high school class reunion recently and most of the women, ncluding me, who had divorced in the "70s rush" have never remarried. I wonder why?? LOL.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 43 (view)

should you stay with someone who cheats on YOU.... Posted: 11/25/2007 8:29:39 AM
When my now ex husband cheated on me I sang him that old Country-Western song......." Cheatin's a two-way street and neither way will lead me home". That was the end of the marriage. I don't put up with that kind of crap!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 11 (view)

starting and keeping on-line communication: HOW TO Posted: 11/23/2007 12:11:47 PM
I personally don't waste my time composing initial emails that are anything other than a quick couple of sentences.....and don't expect others to either. Many men in my age group do not type well. Some are not particularly familiar with computers or online Personals sites. The fact that they try is enough for me in a first email.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 37 (view)

Inquiry about Tea Posted: 11/22/2007 6:22:03 PM
I had Earl Grey in restaurants and dislike it intensely. It tastes "musty". Right now I'm back to Lipton's again after a stint with Tetley's and then Red Rose. My tap water is full of minerals which give a flavor of their own along with the tea flavor. Yet tea made with bottled water seems "flat" and tasteless.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 36 (view)

Inquiry about Tea Posted: 11/22/2007 6:18:39 PM
I just had Tetley's tonight in the restaurant where we ate our Thanksgiving dinner. They seemed to have changed the color of the envelope since I last used it at home. Surely you should be able to order it online and have it shipped to your home.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 33 (view)

Internet dating = The 'backwards' method? Posted: 11/22/2007 4:24:01 PM
To Msg 14: Convo = conversation

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 54 (view)

Not kissing on the first date.....why is that a problem with some men. Posted: 11/22/2007 11:27:26 AM
Tell him to take a hike. If he's that miserable on the first date you surely don't need to subject yourself to anymore of his crap. BTW you don't owe him ANY explanations.....or any other guy either. "You are who you are" and they can take it or leave it.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 55 (view)

disturbing death Posted: 11/22/2007 8:26:36 AM
We are having the same problem here in the US with tasers......150 deaths so far I read somewhere and numerous survivors who suffered seriously enough to sue various police departments. These are not people who committed serious crimes......just drunks and such.....and in some cases NO crime was committed. Tasers need to be outlawed ......and quickly!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 34 (view)

how do I get a woman to get past me not having a drivers liscence? Posted: 11/17/2007 8:38:18 AM
Are you sure it's the driver's license and not the DUIs?? I wouldn't date a man who drank to excess even if he had a driver's license. I'd be afraid to ride with him for starters. Soon you can get you license back according to what you said. Why not wait until then?? No confessions will be needed at that point.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 81 (view)

Dumped because my children are of mixed racial heritage Posted: 11/16/2007 8:17:27 AM
I personally don't think it's anybody's business but your own who you slept with in the past. That said, you happen to have visible reminders of one of your past liaisons... so that fact changes the scenario for you. On the other hand, nowadays there are so many white couples who are adopting non-Caucasian children that it's not the oddity it used to be to see these White-Black families at PTA, supermarket, etc.....at least in my area. To answer your question specifically, I see no reason to mention your kids heritage to a date until he becomes important enough in your life to introduce him to your kids. Then he will see for himself. If that ends the relationship, so be it. I don't mean to sound harsh but you need to face reality.....which can sometimes be cruel. Would you really want a guy in your life who looked at your kids with distaste??

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 162 (view)

He logged into POF while on a weekend Date with me Posted: 11/4/2007 3:36:41 PM
Maybe I'm old-fashioned but in my opinion you don't own the guy simply because you spent the weekend with him. I personally would be thoroughly pissed if some guy told me I had no right to be on my computer just because he was there.....and that includes checking the Personals. Talk about possessive...that takes the cake.LOL.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 87 (view)

What would you do - men and women Posted: 11/4/2007 1:33:38 PM
It depends on what kind of a future you're looking for. FWB is not something you're going to find easily with a wife in the wings....especially at your age. Besides, is that really fair to your wife?? Marriage is a legal contract.....either honor it or end it.....and what's wrong with being alone if you're a clearly unhappy with the present situation??

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 13 (view)

What Happens When He Deletes His Profile? Posted: 11/4/2007 1:26:25 PM
When I first started doing online Personals over 4 yrs ago I too used to waste my time on lots of nice chatty emails without ever asking for a phone # to arrange a first meeting. Over time I've learned it doesn't pay. I wasted 6 months on a guy that way. He seemed like a nice normal person but every time we made a date to meet, something came up at the last minute. I eventually lost patience, called him a pathetic piece of crap (which he was) and vowed NEVER again to waste time like that. I've kept that vow. BTW, I learned about a year later that the guy is close to 350 lbs. That could have been his problem...lying.LOL.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 146 (view)

my ex is dyeing with cancer what do i do Posted: 11/4/2007 9:04:32 AM
To MSG #144: Thank you.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 91 (view)

Switching from 'intimate encounter' to 'long term' Posted: 11/4/2007 8:31:08 AM
I find that a lot of stuff in Profiles is meaningless. People put down whatever is easist so that they can get registered. Often they come back later on and "doctor it up a bit""...or a lot if time permits. I as a female user of online Personals always put Long Term because any other designation gets offensive, unwanted emails.....tons of them .....some from guys as young as 18 wanting "fulfilling sex lives with older women". I think you get my point. Actually a long term, monogamous DATING relationship is what I'm looking for and as soon as I exchange a couple of emails with a guy , I make sure he knows I have no interest in marriage, relocation or live-in.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 138 (view)

my ex is dyeing with cancer what do i do Posted: 11/4/2007 8:17:42 AM
Make arrangements for him to have Hospice care at a facility. You can visit him there whenever you want ....or not at all if you don't ....and your children can see him just as easily there. Naturally you are going to feel bad about the guy dying of cancer whether he is your ex or not. It is a horrible disease with an often gruesome ending. I've seen more than enough of it in my lifetime. At your age I probably would have thought like you "for the sake of the children". Now I know better. Children will have many hurts in their lifetime and there is no way you or anyone esle can shield them. Your primary obligation now is to YOURSELF and mitigating the impact of his disease and demise on YOU. My condolences go out to you and your family.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 23 (view)

Too Sensitive? Posted: 11/3/2007 9:35:36 PM
Get rid of him pronto!! Things will only get worse the longer you take his crap. Obviously being with him is not making you happy so what's the point in allowing the creep to insult you??

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 30 (view)

cute women with no personality or conversational skills Posted: 11/1/2007 8:40:19 AM
You didn't mention if these are first dates or if these are women you date regularly. On a first date I see no reason to discuss anything heavy. I'm in a public place with a stranger. Small talk is the order of the day as far as I'm concerned. Plenty of time for "deep" conversations later on.....if there is a "later on".

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 144 (view)

A message from God? Or not? Posted: 11/1/2007 8:33:55 AM
That's a new one on me!! Guess he figured that was one you couldn't argue with.LOL. I personally stay away from those "Godly" types. The ones I've met tend to be very boring.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 18 (view)

Why men don't marry anymore Posted: 10/31/2007 8:44:02 PM
In my age group it's the women who don't want to (re)marry.....and that includes me. There is really no point in it at this time of life.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 46 (view)

When people say The IM doesn't work Posted: 10/31/2007 4:37:00 PM
My IM doesn't work for POF because I need to have Media Player installed and I don't have it nor particularly want it. I don't "do" IM anyway.....with anyone. It has nothing to do with PopUps that that know of.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 175 (view)

What do men think when their wives are aging and losing their figure? Posted: 10/10/2007 9:32:51 PM
Not all older women look like what you described......have you seen some of the "older" men?? I went to my high school class reunion recently and most of the men were bald, paunchy or grey if they had hair left. LOL. The women on the other hand for the most part looked as if they had taken good care of themselves.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 88 (view)

What Do You Think Of Mixed Marriages Posted: 10/7/2007 9:45:36 AM
To verygreeneyez: I was commenting on the OPs post regarding Black/White unions. What on earth has that got to do with a Portugese ex-husband or your Mormon cousins' adoptions?? And my apologies to Msg#63......that was a typo. My post was meant for Msg #83......and when I tried to corrected it, the service wouldn't allow me any more posts because I already had the "last 2" at that time. LOL.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 312 (view)

Why do guys give cell phone numbers instead of home numbers ...is that a clue they are taken? Posted: 10/5/2007 9:38:30 PM
Cell phone numbers can't be looked up whereas landlines unless unlisted can be looked up to show the guy's name and address.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 85 (view)

What Do You Think Of Mixed Marriages Posted: 10/3/2007 4:07:02 PM
To Msg #63: I totally disagree with you and will retain my opinions as I see fit. Who in Hell do you think you are to make comments like "you may want to cut it out" when you know nothing about the situation I described and I had a "front row seat"?? Talk about cojones....yours must weigh you down.LMAO.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 31 (view)

Can you sincerely be objective? Posted: 10/3/2007 4:01:29 PM
If someone isn't interested in me why shoud I blame myself?? Or the guy either for that matter?? If something is "not desirable in my behavior, appearance, etc" to a certain guy then he can move on and find someone more suited to him.LOL. I am not about ot change myself at this late date...I like who I am.....and anyone who doesn't like me as I am need not stick around!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 82 (view)

What Do You Think Of Mixed Marriages Posted: 10/3/2007 9:21:30 AM
It's always the children who are hurt .....and they are the innocent ones who had no say in this choice. What two consenting adults do is nobody's business but their own....but in my opinion they should think VERY carefully before they bring children into the world. Two of my dearest friends...now both deceased...were a black/white couple. The older daughter married into the "Black world" where she was NOT accepted. The younger daughter chose the "White world" when she married and was NOT accepted either. All of this happened in the eighties but I see little change in public feelings twenty years later

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 111 (view)

Should I tell his wife? Posted: 10/1/2007 6:25:35 PM
More than likely his wife already knows what he is and has her own agenda for staying with him. YOU are the lucky one.....you got rid of him. She has to put up with him or divorce him. Next time ask to see the divorce decree before you get involved. Separated can mean as little as having separate bedrooms. One guy got highly insulted because I wouldn't meet him for a coffee date after I found out he and his wife were "separated" because she lived upstairs and he lived down.....with NO separate entrances from outside. You meet all kinds in this world and the Personals are a zoo!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 43 (view)

woman's sincerity at relationships Posted: 10/1/2007 4:03:31 PM
How can anyone...man or woman...know for sure whether or not they are ready for a new relationship unless they DATE in order to find out?? I don't consider ANY of my dates a "waste of time" simply because I don't want to commit to them. Don't you ever find dating FUN??

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

What should I do here ... Posted: 9/30/2007 8:55:30 AM
Up until recently this service allowed all kinds of weird photos. I'm happy to see the change. Maybe she simply left hers there. Personally I would meet the woman and take it from there. I've met lots of guys on dating services who looked NOTHING like their pics.....and so what?? She hasn't been "caught in a lie" as yet.....your friends are telling you tales which may or may not be accurate!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 91 (view)

Easy question, difficult answer. Posted: 9/25/2007 10:03:42 PM
To Msg 90: EVERYTHING posted here is open to opinion!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 85 (view)

Easy question, difficult answer. Posted: 9/25/2007 5:54:24 PM
Part of my post didn't transmit, I guess. I was answering Oriole's Msg #71 which she had written to me.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 293 (view)

would you marry for money? Posted: 9/25/2007 5:45:40 PM
Of course not!! What is the point in marrying someone I have no particular interest in, putting my all into the legal bargain I made , and then walking out with nothing after all the time and effort I put in?? That would be ridiculous!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 77 (view)

Easy question, difficult answer. Posted: 9/25/2007 1:47:54 PM
You are WRONG!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 67 (view)

Easy question, difficult answer. Posted: 9/24/2007 10:38:25 PM
To Msg 66: The auto crash that took my oldest son's life was not preventable by him ......so what on earth are you talking about?? Are you trying to say that ALL auto accidents are preventable by the person who is killed?? That's absurd!!

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 32 (view)

Easy question, difficult answer. Posted: 9/24/2007 9:57:17 AM
To Msg 11: If the guy didn't love me then I sure as Hell wouldn't love him!! Love to me is a two way street......and in spite of what a lot of people would have you believe it can be turned off when needed. I call that" emotional preservation". Some would call it "coldness".LOL.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 31 (view)

MEET MY TRUE LOVE ON HERE AND HE BROKE MY HEART Posted: 9/23/2007 9:54:55 AM
I don't know why you are so puzzled. The guy told you right from the beginning that he didn't want the same kind of life you did... i e marriage and kids. You went ahead anyway hoping to change his mind instead of accepting what he said and finding someone who DOES want what you want.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 32 (view)

The Other Woman... Posted: 9/20/2007 5:00:07 PM
Both she and your ex sound like a couple of people to stay away from......and I'm talking about NO contact. Tell her so and then change your email addy.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 2 (view)

Amazing feeling... Posted: 9/19/2007 10:16:42 PM
Since August 1?? You can't possibly know him that quickly.

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 675 (view)

Men on a Marriage Strike Posted: 9/19/2007 9:14:36 AM
To Flints Gunner: That's for sure.LOL. Seriously, the reason men don't need to marry nowadays is that women give them everything they want WITHOUT marriage......not so years ago. As Jay Leno's grandmother used to say: "Firsta the ring , thena the thing"".

Reenie999

Joined: 11/7/2005

Msg: 673 (view)

Men on a Marriage Strike Posted: 9/19/2007 9:04:49 AM
Not in my age group.....it's the WOMEN who cherish their freedom!!

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