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Thread: Going back to school?

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 47 (view)

Going back to school? Posted: 9/15/2006 12:58:53 PM
I can certainly speak from personal experience on this one. I went to college after being out of high school for over 20 years. It was difficult at times, but it was definitely worth it. I went to school part time for about 6 years, then I finished my last two years by going full time for just over a year. Going to shool as an older student does have some advantages. People usually have more self-disciplne as they get older. And of course, we don't typically 'party' quite as much as the 18 year old students. It takes a lot of hard work, dedication, and commitment. That being said, the rewards are wonderful. I have more than tripled my annual income since I went to college. I had great work experience before I went to school, but I was not able to get the jobs I wanted without a degree. Now, I don't have any problems whatsoever with that. I can be much more selective about the jobs I take. Good luck on your decision. Remember this: time will pass whether you are in school or not. In 5 years, you could look back and think: WOW...I'm so glad I went back to school. Or you could think: D@mn, I wish I had went back to school. The choice is yours....

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 6 (view)

Has anyone done this in a car before. Posted: 9/15/2006 12:45:32 PM
I travel with my job, so I am in different rental cars all of the time. I am constantly trying to 'drive' them in ways that don't work...LOL! Try turning on the headlights or windshield wipers in a different vehicle. It just doesn't work the same..LOL.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 21 (view)

Sexual harassment question Posted: 9/15/2006 12:42:07 PM
I agree with one of the posters above....avoid specifics. Just say something generic, such as that you left to pursue a better job. In fact, that's exactly what you did...a job with better working conditions. Although you didn't do anything wrong on your previous job, making an issue of something like that will make you appear to be difficult to work with. You shouldn't ever make yourself look bad on a job application...those are the ones that go straight to file 13.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 12 (view)

annoying repetitive sounds Posted: 9/15/2006 12:36:58 PM
I can't stand repetitive sounds like that...I had a similar situation on a job about 8 years ago. We had these 'dumb' terminals to access computer programs. The terminal in the cube next to me had a 'key click' function that just drove me nuts. He wasn't much of a computer nerd, so one day at lunch I went over and changed his settings. He made a comment to me later that day that something was wrong with his computer...it had mysteriously stopped making clicking sounds when he typed.... Of course, I NEVER confessed!

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 11 (view)

Separated men and their sick wives Posted: 8/19/2006 6:15:32 PM
^^^^I agree with tinydancer92... I've never dated anybody in that situation, but I did trade a few emails about a year ago with a much older gentleman that was in a similar situation. He was still married, living with his wife, but she was an invalid. I wouldn't date anybody in that situation--I would STILL consider it cheating, and I would STILL consider him unavailable for a real relationship. btw tinydancer92: way to go.....the best revenge is living well...kudos to you!

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 23 (view)

Men, and being good cooks? Posted: 8/19/2006 5:53:59 PM
My guy cooks all of the time and I just love it. If he didn't cook, we would just eat out more often I suppose. He absolutely get brownie points--but if he didn't cook it wouldn't be a deal breaker. There's many qualities that more important than cooking.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 42 (view)

Kissing and affection Posted: 8/19/2006 5:48:54 PM
Spending hours stroking, caressing, etc. sounds like affection to me. I think kisses are great, but the most important thing is affection. Without it, I don't think there would be much of a relationship. Hang in there...I'm sure there's many women that would be willing to forgo kisses in exchange for having someone spend hours touching them.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 11 (view)

Should i hide this about my self.... Posted: 8/13/2006 8:57:31 AM
You can't "cure" yourself with another person--that has to come from inside you. There's nothing wrong with having someone in your life, but expecting them to cure you is just wrong. Nobody can fullfill all your needs, and expecting them to do so is setting them up for failure. If you do start dating, don't be too quick to bring out all the skeletons in your closet right away. Make sure you get to know enough about her to trust her with your feelings. On the other hand, if you begin getting a bit serious you'd better have a serious conversation about the past. Otherwise, you could end up alienating her.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 105 (view)

If you met the man of your dreams but had to share him, could you? Posted: 8/13/2006 8:49:48 AM
@DeagleNINja: It's not a matter of jealousy at all. An intimate relationship to me is just that--intimate. That means that certain things are shared between the couple and not with others (and I don't mean just sex). There's nothing wrong with either party having a friendship or close family ties, but if it crosses that fine line, then it's a problem regardless of whether it's a male or female. JMHO

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 12 (view)

Single or separated??? Posted: 8/11/2006 4:49:00 PM
Unless your divorce is final, you are married. Assuming you are actually going through a divorce, that is just a temporary status but legally you are still married. Not to add to your angst, but many women would be hesitant to get involved with a man who is in the process of getting divorced. Before I met my guy, I talked with several guys who were 'separated'. They all had these wonderful explanations as to why they were not yet divorced. In one case, the guy finally admitted he was still living with his wife. In another case, the guy had an 'open relationship' with his wife and was just looking for someone for a fling. Even in cases where the marriage really is over and a divorce is imminent, I was hesitant because I was be looking for a serious relationship and often the guy would not be ready for that yet. Hang in there and give it some time. When it's all behind you, you can move on to a better life. And don't lie on your profile...that starts things off on the wrong foot.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 12 (view)

Would you be in a relationship with a crossdresser? Posted: 8/11/2006 4:30:35 PM
I'm pretty open-minded, but I don't think I would feel comfortable with my guy dressing like a woman. I'm not attracted to women, so I think it would be a turn-off. A one-time thing would probably be funny, but if it happened more than once or twice....that would be different.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 32 (view)

Is there one thing you dislike about camping? Or more than one. Posted: 8/8/2006 6:23:52 PM
I like the comforts of home...or a hotel at a minimum. I actually consider being in a hotel 'roughing it'. Other than the general lack of comforts, I dislike: 1. Bugs & other crawly creepy things 2. The inability to shower / wash my hand / go to the bathroom in a normal manner without having to resort to an expedition to some place with water.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 23 (view)

Do you represent the height on your profile? Posted: 8/5/2006 5:17:53 PM
I round up to a whole inch, but that's the extent of my fudging. If somebody didn't want to talk to me because of my height...good riddance.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 29 (view)

Non-Religious: Posted: 8/5/2006 5:14:45 PM
If you look at all the options under many of the questions, there are grey areas where the choices are not as straightfoward as we would like. I am spiritual but not affiliated with organized religion...there's really not a good choice for that. I selected 'Other' for lack of a better choice even though I would consider other a religion that is just not on the list. If it's important to you, just make sure the subject comes up soon in your emails/conversations. That way neither of you will end up disappointed.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

Trying to understand the eyes Posted: 8/5/2006 5:00:25 PM
Yes...staring is creepy but so is the inability to look at me straight in my eyes. I have always looked people in the eye---it never occurred to me they would think I was romantically interested in them. For me, that's not the case at all---I'm just an open, friendly person.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

Two Words for some guys turns girls Off WHY? Posted: 8/5/2006 4:53:55 PM
Perhaps you could try to explain your illness to them in a way that helps them understand it. People tend to be afraid of the unknown.....having the facts takes away some of that unknown factor. Otherwise, they may just think the worst. If you are up front with them and they still don't give you a chance, you don't really need those kind of girls in your life. Good luck.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 70 (view)

If you met the man of your dreams but had to share him could you? Posted: 8/2/2006 6:30:48 PM
No way...because by definition the man of my dreams would not 'belong' to another woman.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 24 (view)

If I am going to be bald, should I get a hair transplant? Posted: 8/2/2006 6:29:12 PM
Don't bother with a transplant....just accept being bald and learn to enjoy it. Just think...no more haircuts, no more bad hair days, etc. But definitely don't do that thing some guys do where they grow one long lock of hair and wrap it around their head---that just looks stupid. btw: my boyfriend (who has plenty of hair) showed me a t-shirt the other day that was really cute. It said: I'M TO SEXY FOR MY HAIR THAT'S WHY IT ISN'T THERE.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 57 (view)

How important are teeth.. Posted: 8/2/2006 6:10:35 PM
Teeth are important...but there are other things more important. While the look of your teeth has an impact on your appearance, one of the posters above was right on that cleanliness is more important than looks when it comes to teeth. Keep them brushed, don't worry about them any more, and focus on the good things about yourself.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 5 (view)

A self-deprecating sense of humour Posted: 8/2/2006 5:55:25 PM
I think it depends on the extent to which he is self-depreciating. I can appreciate someone being able to laugh at themselves as long as they know where to draw the line. My sister once dated a guy that was overweight. He was always making horrible remarks about himself...that was a real turn off.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

how does one interpit their own dreams ? Posted: 7/26/2006 6:40:50 PM
Dreams are usually related to what is going on in our lives at the moment. If your dreams have a recurring theme...such as losing your teeth, you can analyze that by thinking about how you felt in your dream about it. Were you stressed, sad, angry? I have recurring dreams all the time, and they are usually triggered by a lot of anxiety about something. Did you know you can control your dreams? Do some research on that..it's amazing and is very helpful if your dreams are of a distrubing nature. I control my dreams all the time and it never ceases to amaze me. And another thing: I had heard for years that in those falling dreams, you would die if you actually hit the bottom before you wake up....not true. I have hit bottom in my dream and lived to post on POF!

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 2 (view)

I chuckled at Match.com's new ad Posted: 7/26/2006 6:23:05 PM
What a joke.....that site is just horrible. I was on it for a few months and didn't meet anybody. I signed up for this site and met my fishie, so thanks POF!! bwt...Yes, I'm only here for the forums. Love them!!

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

Need some bankruptcy advice Posted: 7/26/2006 6:17:41 PM
You can't file bankruptcy against your student loans. If you have a degree, why are you only bringing home $750 every two weeks? Have you considered getting a part-time job to pay off your debt? And of course, most importantly you must STOP using your credit cards. Check out Suze Orman's website. She is an excellent financial advisor and has some great resources on her website.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 15 (view)

Higher Education. Did You Go To University/College? Did It Help? Posted: 7/26/2006 6:09:33 PM
Of course there are benefits to all those years in college....assuming you actually learned something during that timeframe. I work in a field where I deal with people with all levels of education. I have met some of the most incredibly stupid "educated" people and incredibly intelligent "uneducated" people. Keep in mind that while you may start out at a salary lower than you would like, you are highly likely to progress up the ladder with an education. My sister got a degree in Accounting and thought she should start out at a manger level with big buck and all the perks of upper management. She was so discouraged with the whole thing she never went to work. She had the mistaken idea that having a degree somehow allowed her to skip "paying her dues" with hard work and constantly proving herself worthy of promotion. Don't fall into that mindset...it will get you nowhere fast.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 8 (view)

What's more important... A good job or your happiness? Posted: 7/26/2006 5:57:10 PM
I have heard it's difficult to get fired from a government jobs. Perhaps they are just trying to make you miserable enough to make you quit. That being said, the only relevant answer to your question "What's more important....the job or my happiness?" is your own answer. Have you tried reading books about dealing with difficult people? Maybe that would provide you some tools to use. And by all means, make sure you keep a record of everything in the event you do end up getting fired. By the way...it looks MUCH worse on your record to get fired from a job than just quitting one so keep that in mind as you search for your answer. Personally, I think happiness is much more important. But then again, I have a job that has a component that I just hate. I stay motivated to hang on because of the financial rewards. It's so difficult to strike the right balance...

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 8 (view)

What do people think about women without children? Posted: 7/26/2006 5:41:08 PM
I'm responding to this from a totally different perspective: I am a woman that doesn't have children. Most of my life, I have been told, "Oh, you will change your mind later on."....or asked "Who's going to take care of you when you grow old?" I did not have children ON PURPOSE and it was completely by choice. I do like children, I just never wanted any of my own. I suppose people thought my choice was a poor one or they would not have insulted my intelligence by suggesting I would change my mind later. I have never regretted not having children...they are a blessing to those that want them--it's just not for me. And I really think that having children so someone can take care of you when you get old is a really cr@ppy reason to have them....JMHO.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

How Does Your DNA Show? Posted: 7/21/2006 4:14:59 PM
Body type - Maternal grandmother (SHORT!) Skin type - Paternal grandmother Intellect, personality - Father Tenderheartedness - Mother I also got a couple of negative qualities from my Mom, but I've worked very hard to overcome them.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

Angry Men....WTF is up with that???Where are all the good men? Posted: 7/21/2006 3:56:23 PM
People (male or female) who attack you like that are doing so because they feel threatened. Not that you did ANYTHING wrong...it's just a mechanism they use to make themselves feel better. I once got an email from a guy that was about 600 miles away that was just full of sexual comments. I emailed him back and told him I did not appreciate his comments. He apologized in the next email and made some excuses for his behavor. We traded a couple of email, then he reverted right back to all the nasty talk...and I'm talking NASTY here, not just a sexy remark or so. I told him I was not interested in talking to him further, and he got SO P1SSED! He called me all kinds of names, made all kinds of horrible remarks about me, etc. Then, he had the nerve to email me a week or so later apologizing asking me to please write him back. He wrote me every day for about a month--always going back and forth between being nasty and being nice. I finally blocked him. If he's that abusive via email, I can only imagine how he would be in person.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 13 (view)

Help with this thing for my job! Posted: 7/15/2006 2:57:44 PM
One 'ice-breaker' game I enjoyed was this: Have poster board or large paper available, along with lots of different colors of crayons and/or markers. Have the participants draw a picture that represents their favorite movie. When all are finished, have participants go around to each other and try to guess the movie. It's a lot of fun and creates a lot of opportunity for people to get to know each other.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 56 (view)

Do Alcoholics Choose To Drink? Posted: 7/7/2006 6:03:43 PM
An alcoholic has a choice of either drinking or going into withdrawal. My sister was an alcoholic, and she quit several months ago. I witnessed part of what she went through, and I don't know how she did it. She ended up in the hospital for several days, suffering from sever hallucinations, nausea, vomiting, you name it. I don't condone alcoholism....but I now have more insight into why an alcoholic continues to drink far past what he/she should. I guess that just proves the point that one shouldn't judge someone unless they have walked a mile in their shoes.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

disliking your job Posted: 7/4/2006 5:07:14 PM
Your profile says you are 27, so I would assume you have been at your current job for a bit. I agree with epsilonbj......but another piece of advise is this: figure out what it is about your current job you don't like. Is it the work, the people, the work environment, the location? If you are not happy with the work itself and have only been there a short time, perhaps you could acquire some additional skills while you are 'paying your dues' timewise. Or perhaps you could transfer to a different position within the same company.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 15 (view)

Would you? Posted: 7/3/2006 2:55:08 PM
I love animals but am allergic to many of them. I would make sure the person knew I had serious allergies to animals. That way, they would know what they were dealing with. Perhaps allergies were the problem with the guys that replied saying they weren't interested.....

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 61 (view)

why do people get mad at honesty? Posted: 7/3/2006 2:44:17 PM
I'm well known as a person that will be brutally honest. If somebody asks my opinion, I will give it based on the premise that they ACTUALLY want it. However, there is a big difference between being honest and being callous. Remember, you can make your point and be honest without being hurtful or mean-spirited.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 36 (view)

It's late. What do you grab? Posted: 7/3/2006 2:39:17 PM
I usually just have a Honey Peanut Balance Bar. It has protein and vitamins....and yummy to boot!

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 10 (view)

Songs and smells Posted: 7/3/2006 2:33:25 PM
The smell of asphalt always reminds me of my first trip to Six Flags. The smell of peanut butter always reminds me of a time I made jelly with my mother. (We used peanut butter jars to put the jelly in, and I was in charge of washing them.) The song 'Boys of Summer' by Don Henley reminds me of a special moment with my step daughter. Sigh, I sure do miss my mother and my step daughter sometimes.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 39 (view)

Offbeat habits..........inspired by the one sock thread. Posted: 7/3/2006 2:21:00 PM
A couple come to mind, but I think this is the 'wierdest' of them all: I have a fascination with the shape of things. I love to sketch geometric shapes.....my favorite is to draw a box and then draw lines thru it to make many, many tiny boxes inside it. Then I color every other one to make a 'checkerbox' pattern. When I am in a position where I can't physically draw things, I trace them 'mentally'. It's a huge stress reliever.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 11 (view)

Doesn't anyone like kittens? Posted: 6/30/2006 1:43:49 PM
I LOVE kittens but I'm allergic to them.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 10 (view)

1 sock at a time or not..... Posted: 6/30/2006 1:42:01 PM
I put on a sock & a sock then a shoe and a shoe...I don't think either way suggests something wrong with the person....it's just a personal preference. I hate to walk barefoot....so I'm always putting my socks on right away.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 22 (view)

What pro sport would you love to play? What did you want to be when you were young? Posted: 6/28/2006 6:05:09 PM
Since I'm not much of a fan of sports, I guess I would go with something simple like a tennis pro. Good exercise and fun. My dream job when I was little was to be a writer for a comedian. I've always had a really quirky sense of humor, and I think I could have done really well in that field. I'm just way to shy to be the comedian myself, but I think writing would be very cool. Now my dream job would be an interior designer. What's not to like about spending someone else's money on extravagant purchases--and getting paid for it at the same time! Plus, it's a job I would LOVE.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

one wish Posted: 6/28/2006 5:57:38 PM
nickjbor: Your wish has been granted..... I would wish for a lifetime of happiness. The reason, of course, is that if I have a lifetime of happiness then I have everything I need. I'm all for money, but it can't buy happiness.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 39 (view)

Is not wanting children considered selfish?? Posted: 6/27/2006 7:34:22 PM
It is ABSOLUTELY NOT selfish to not want children of your own. In fact, I think some people that have children are selfish---how many people put enough thought into that decision to really consider what their child's life will be like. Isn't that selfish??? I mean, really, if you don't have the child's best interest at heart, then it most likely IS selfish. Don't let people guilt you into having children.....as I've always said, isn't it better to not have children and regret it than it is to have children and regret it??

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 55 (view)

Finding fulfillment Posted: 6/26/2006 7:38:59 PM
@horselady48: I was divorced for about 10 years before I felt 'ready' to take the plunge into dating again. My first marriage really did a number on me, so I just totally wrote off romance during those 10 years. On a positive note, I started looking again for romance in the September/October 2005 timeframe. I met my fishie on here on 11/27 and we've been together ever since. Technically, it only took me about a month or two to find him since I wasn't looking all those years. I look at those 10 years I spent without romance in my life as a time for me to grow and learn about myself and what I REALLY wanted out of life. Good luck on your search...I'm sure your fishie is swimming nearby!

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 82 (view)

can we change somebody Posted: 6/22/2006 8:13:15 PM
If somebody agreed to change something in order to please you, I think you would have to ask yourself how long it would last. For example, a slob can never be changed into a tidy person...it's just not in their nature. So even if they agreed to change, eventually they would revert to their natural state. Find somebody that you don't feel compelled to change, OR.....change yourself. Perhaps you could CHANGE yourself to accept the thing you don't like about him. Of course, I'm being sarcastic....just trying to make a point.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 7 (view)

Why do people wear sunglasses in clubs???? Posted: 6/22/2006 2:01:41 PM
I'm not speaking from experience on this....but my assumption is that: 1. They think they look cool, AND/OR 2. It lets them look at other people discreetly. In either case, it still looks stupid.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 52 (view)

Finding fulfillment Posted: 6/21/2006 8:29:15 PM
A fullfilling relationship is not related to ones age. I was married many years ago in my younger year, and it was rarely if ever fulfilling. On the other hand, I met my fishie on here and our relationship continues to amaze me more every week. We've been together for a little over 6 months now, and I find myself loving him far deeper than I ever thought I was capable of loving anyone. Don't give up on finding a true love and a sizzling hot romance. It took me a long time to find it, but it was well worth the wait.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 23 (view)

Excuses for leaving a Job.. Posted: 6/21/2006 8:06:51 PM
Just go with the one that you feel comfortable using. The 'WHY' you are leaving doesn't really matter to your employer. What's the most important is 'HOW' you resign....such as giving adequate notice, etc. And don't steal company property on your way out! Just remember, you may want to use them as a reference in the future.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

Favorite Chat Program Posted: 6/21/2006 7:56:41 PM
I YAHOOOOOOOOO I just love all the little emoticons, avitars, etc. (I'm sure all of the IM services have them.) I tried AOL but just never got accustomed to it.....I reverted back to Yahoo. @kingrattus: I tried trillian once but it just didn't perform the way I expected...probably a setup issue or something. I could only see one IM service at a time...which defeated the whole purpose.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 6 (view)

How is your INNER CHILD? Posted: 6/14/2006 6:45:33 PM
^^^^^Seems to be a lot of us!! Your Inner Child Is Surprised You see many things through the eyes of a child. Meaning, you're rarely cynical or jaded. You cherish all of the details in life. Easily fascinated, you enjoy experiencing new things.

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 21 (view)

She was crying Posted: 6/14/2006 4:11:01 AM
Your intentions were good....it was a nice gesture on your part. From her point of view, though, perhaps it frightened her to be approached by someone in the park like that. There are some very strange people out there, so she most likely assumed the worst about you. She was obviously in a very vulnerable place emotionally, so you have to take that into consideration also. That being said, don't let her reaction keep you from trying to rescue 'damsels in distress' in the future!!

lff001

Joined: 11/11/2005

Msg: 29 (view)

Should I? Posted: 6/7/2006 2:58:22 PM
Don't let him move in with you....you may end up putting yourself in a bad situation. If you are really concerned about his welfare, help him find a place then wash your hands of him. There are a lot of people out there that rent rooms by the month, looking for roommates, etc. If all else fails, there's always shelters for people in that situation. Just don't let him get his hooks in you again....JMHO

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