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 Sardonis
Joined: 9/28/2007
Msg: 16
Why do men ask so few questions?Page 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)

I'm totally okay with there being men out there who feel that in their e-mails they should not have to ask questions or leave their names--I'm just not really into that type of man.


But you really have no clue as to what kind of man that is or is not. Are you really judging a man first and foremost on his letter writing etiquette skills?

Don't take my word for it, but so many women just set themselves up and they don't even realize it.
 SweetnSassyNatureLover
Joined: 4/11/2008
Msg: 19
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/16/2008 10:09:13 PM
Luke you crack me up!!!
 867love
Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 23
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/16/2008 10:26:42 PM
cuz we already know the answer to most of our questions: nunya!
 solax
Joined: 2/2/2006
Msg: 34
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History
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 9:39:03 AM

Dialogue is dialogue. It's not necessarily about one asking questions, it should be about whether you find the exchange interesting enough to continue. What if a man asks LOTS of question but they're all the wrong questions ("How many dates 'til I can get laid," for example)? Would that keep a woman's interest any more than a man who asks none? One way to inspire someone to ask questions is to be interesting, yourself. Can you tell a good story? Can you bring your experiences to life as you tell them? Or are you relying on a somewhat mistaken notion that any man who is truly interested in you will ask lots of questions...about you? I mean, what if he asks questions but they aren't about you - is that good enough?



ding ding ding we have a winner
this is one one area where i have struggled the exchange of qwestions sometimes intrestiong sometimes the bland yes /no answer and theres always the read delete lol

then theres guys like me thant wish little out of a woman are you safe? can i trust you?will you trust me?will you treat me as i treat you? will youi be honest and upfrunt with me? where do you see this going? ect. im shure you get the point
 funone571
Joined: 4/18/2006
Msg: 41
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 11:55:06 AM

Why do men ask so few questions?
Maybe because we're tired of getting one word answers.
 Sardonis
Joined: 9/28/2007
Msg: 43
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 2:02:57 PM
Set ourselves up for what? I'm not wanting for anything, and I'm always grateful that I have met so many kind and interesting and sexy men in my life. I've recently met another one that gives me butterflies, and I feel very fortunate.


Good for you. You must be different.

The number one complaint that women express on this forum can be summed as follows " He was such the perfect gentleman, then we had sex and now he won't call me."

Players know to be polite. That's all I am saying.


I know this wasn't directed at me, but I completely understand that it works both ways: There are men who are hard to talk to and there are women who are hard to talk to.


Yes, thank you. I think it would be nice for more females to keep this in mind, when they flippantly tell men "why don't you just go talk to her, like it is so hard? oh my god!"



...one of my firm boundaries is that I will not try to force a connection with someone.


Well that's great. But just remember that you are a woman and you can get away with being passive and picky.

I don't try to force a connection either. But most of the time, it's up to the Man to make something happen.
 TheOneWho_
Joined: 3/22/2007
Msg: 45
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 2:48:19 PM
OP,
You have some very good points.

I see this from the other side; the last few e-mail exchanges I've had have been rather one-sided.

My interest fades fast after I get a couple one-line replies
 Bewildered100
Joined: 11/27/2007
Msg: 46
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Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 3:24:19 PM
Here...I'll save the ladies some time on the first few questions.

1. Sure, I don't mind.
2. No, I sent in a ferret and that seeemed to do the trick.
3. HAHAHAHA, I agree completely!
4. Me? No, I've never tried barbecued llama with hollandaise sauce.
5. Hey, set your phone to vibrate and I'll put mine on speed dial.
6. Oh, you love animals too? Do you kill flies?
7. Bet I can make you snort when you laugh.
8. What kinda bait did you use for that?
 toomuch13
Joined: 6/28/2007
Msg: 47
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 3:36:40 PM
I get these bland e-mails too that I do not know what to do with. Maybe a lot of lawyers are e-mailing me and afraid I will hold what they say against them, because I do not know if the guy is not interested and being nice or if he just does not know what to ask me. I can't figure it out either.

I remember a couple of years ago having this WONDERFUL date with a guy and nothing. I volleyed a soft e-mail to him the next day saying I had a great time and he responded about a week later with a bland you're an "amazing woman" e-mail, but nothing for me to gage his interest. No telephone call or anything. I figured the guy was not interested and trying to let me down nicely. I let it go.

I ran into the guy recently and he mentions how he hoped we could have gone further. I said, "well you should have let me know that, because we could have." Basically, it was all "safe" communication, which goes nowhere.
 toomuch13
Joined: 6/28/2007
Msg: 49
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 3:42:42 PM
UnstoppableLoveMachine, funny you should state this, "Crazy idea, if there are specific questions you want answered in a first email, how about writing them in your profile and asking people to answer them?"

I was thinking of this as I was driving to see a friend. I came up with the questions I think are important to me. My favorite saying is, "you get what you give in this world."

Though, I would say, once you have been out with someone and started getting to know them, the exchanges should be a bit more deep.
 Sardonis
Joined: 9/28/2007
Msg: 51
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 4:00:18 PM
I remember a couple of years ago having this WONDERFUL date with a guy and nothing. I volleyed a soft e-mail to him the next day saying I had a great time and he responded about a week later with a bland you're an "amazing woman" e-mail, but nothing for me to gage his interest. No telephone call or anything. I figured the guy was not interested and trying to let me down nicely. I let it go.

I ran into the guy recently and he mentions how he hoped we could have gone further. I said, "well you should have let me know that, because we could have." Basically, it was all "safe" communication, which goes nowhere.


No offense, but are you stupid?

The guy tells you that you are an "amazing woman" and you think that is bland and a sign of non-interest?

And of course, you were wrong in the end.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 53
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 5:22:56 PM
I am beiing told that I am gorgeous, charming, amazing and unique. Where is the shovel when I need it? but then, the man is a genius for seeing my best character traits and he barely knows me....
 clasact
Joined: 1/18/2008
Msg: 58
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Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 6:25:54 PM
The very best dialogue(s) I've had with a man or anyone for that matter, weren't question and answer sessions. Hmmm, more like statements in which a conversation ensued about a particular subject or another. Not that there weren't questions but very few.

It's just boring if every other line tossed back and forth is a question like an interrogation. I don't talk to my friends that way.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 60
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 6:32:18 PM
I dated the man I am talking about before, and we have seen each other again in person, he just seems to use way too many complimentary words about me. Makes him look either desparate or appear to be a liar or a player.
 oldskoolb
Joined: 2/27/2007
Msg: 69
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 9:36:14 PM

Just wanted to point out that you are making the assumption here that men actually read profiles which I've generally found is not the case


Sounds like the men in question here are just lazy


I remember a couple of years ago having this WONDERFUL date with a guy and nothing. I volleyed a soft e-mail to him the next day saying I had a great time and he responded about a week later with a bland you're an "amazing woman" e-mail, but nothing for me to gage his interest. No telephone call or anything. I figured the guy was not interested and trying to let me down nicely. I let it go.

I ran into the guy recently and he mentions how he hoped we could have gone further. I said, "well you should have let me know that, because we could have." Basically, it was all "safe" communication, which goes nowhere.


I don't think he was trying to let you down; it sounds like he was too much of a pansy to actively pursue you.

My opinion in both cases is that you should expect better of the men you meet and exchange messages with or else find other men. I agree with vro312; if you don't like how they write then throw those fish back in the pond.
 John_Mon
Joined: 4/30/2008
Msg: 70
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/17/2008 11:21:25 PM
Because we know all the answers... Just Kidding. Interesting you say some of these things. In most cases, I have asked many gals questions related to there profile on this site, always sign with my name, but very few respond back.
 toomuch13
Joined: 6/28/2007
Msg: 71
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/21/2008 3:04:05 PM
No offense, but are you stupid?

No, I'm not stupid, but a lot of men say nice things to get rid of women. The guy in question never asked me on another date and "wished me luck" in my writing career. To me that sounds like a nice "get lost" so I got lost.
 toomuch13
Joined: 6/28/2007
Msg: 72
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/21/2008 3:09:33 PM
"don't think he was trying to let you down; it sounds like he was too much of a pansy to actively pursue you."

I agree he was a "pansy" and I let the fishy go.
 DLo!
Joined: 4/23/2008
Msg: 87
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Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/22/2008 7:46:12 AM
I've noticed that women do that also....they just e-mail with a general statement... What is that... lol. There is plenty on my profile to come up with at least one question. Maybe it's a lack of conversational skills?? Even if the woman is gorgeous.... a read/delete! I'm interested in people that can be expressive and have substance in their communication ability. But then....no questions could very well mean the person is just not interested either, so the read/delete works there too! Xo~D'Lo!
 mthomjmark
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 91
Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/22/2008 9:14:27 PM
women do the same thing. this is the internet, so I'm sure there will be lots of bad communications.



Have noticed that when men write emails they very rarely ask any questions to the woman they're writing to. This makes it awkward writing back as you have no questions to answer and have to come up with something completely original to say.
Men often don't bother to sign their name at the bottom either so you know who you are talking to.

I think asking questions is vital to keep up the dialogue before going on a date. Is this maybe why women lose interest in guys and don't write back. Do guys think it might be a good idea to include more questions in emails to get to know someone?
 xeot
Joined: 10/25/2007
Msg: 92
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Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/22/2008 9:22:05 PM
Few questions... A few reasons.

1) I learn through normal conversation, not question and answer.

2) Before I stopped participating, I was too busy answering questions as so many women have a job interview style...

3) When I ask a question, they aren't answered or answered in as few words as possible. Asking just becomes pointless.
 Greyfeld
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 94
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Why do men ask so few questions?
Posted: 6/22/2008 11:19:39 PM

But if they don't ask me for a date or a phone number then I can't ever go out with them....


Do yourself a favor... if the emails you get aren't particularly intriguing (they don't do anything to really catch your eye), then don't reply to them.
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