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 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 112
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?Page 14 of 15    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)
Because I want some damn sex, that's why !
I already have lots of friends I hang out with.
I appreciate all the women I'm not having sex with.
I've wasted too much of my life appreciating all the women I don't have sex with.
I don't want anymore women to appreciate not having sex with.

Is it too much to ask for one damn woman I can have sex with ?
And, I'm sick of being accused of being selfish just for wanting someone to have sex with !
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 116
You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 11/6/2008 2:42:45 PM

but the truth is men need sex.

The "pops" we're hearing are all the Catholic priests( no I seriously doubt they ALL molested altar boys) and other faith's ascetic "holy men", healthy widowers, even non clergy single men(or men with incapacitated wives) whose belief system precludes pre or extramarital sex...the "pops" we're hearing are all those men exploding because they needed sex and couldn't have it.
You wanna try again,dude?
Cindy O
 selfsong
Joined: 8/8/2007
Msg: 117
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 11/7/2008 2:13:57 PM
OP

Because I not only have a want but there is a need for it


OOps i replied to this thread already..I feel so smart..LOL
 *buzz*
Joined: 6/1/2006
Msg: 119
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 11/9/2008 10:22:55 AM

At least that's they way I am. At this age I don't want random hookups, i want a steady. And I want her to feel the same. If not, on I go, alone and okay with that.

Well said! And by the way, this solid requirement in your head is eating you up? Is it all you can think of? If that's true, surely you can purchase sex for the sake of having sex.
But the best things in life come freely and with broad smile on face, warm embrace and letting the flow take its course. TLC.
 ________
Joined: 12/24/2006
Msg: 121
You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 11/15/2008 1:55:16 PM
While being solid is a requirement for sex -- I don't think sex is a solid requirement.
 Discerning Virtuosa
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 124
You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 11/30/2008 6:16:28 PM
I've come to the conclusion that men seem to be deathly afraid of "relationships" even when nothing is being asked of them. I've saved myself a lot of grief and time by being just focused on my own sexual needs and finding a (slightly) younger, regular partner who is willing to meet them. It is the one thing that requires the hands on of a man and I don't wish to keep experiencing alone. I've finally figured out, what do I really need a man for otherwise? I'm 45 and have never found love, never been able to count on a man, - even my own father abandoned me. Time for me to stop looking for something that's not there. I'm tired of society's guilt telling me I shouldn't have a sex life outside of a committed relationship or I must be some kind of a harlot, while others have had more failed marriages (and children from them) than I have panties in my lingerie drawer. I don't get it - what is the point of a relationship other than regular sex? It seems if I don't put out and present myself as looking for LTR it draws all of the snakes out of the woodwork.
 Rythmn
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 125
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 12/31/2008 7:39:17 PM
hey maeflowers, i'm with you! still looking for those twins. OP, i do not totally understand your question. if you are saying that you want to cuddle, but not have sexual intercourse or oral sex, but still have an intimate and loving relationship in all other aspects, my guess it that you will find a man with similar leanings.

as for me, i'm not feeling that. as for ED, there are ways around it, if the man is willing. some ED issues have to do with desire, others with performance. as to female sexuality, i will say this. i too find sex with the wrong person to be "YICK". but with the right person, well

as to no longer feeling sexual. i can only offer that after my last marital experience, i felt dead inside. but later and once "free", i woke up very quickly. so, make sure this is how you "would" truly feel if you met the right person. i would hate to think you are accepting defeat so quickly. i went for several years in that devastating marriage, so i am not without "data".

however, if you really don't feel sexual, then so be it. same for anyone else male or female, just don't expect a match with someone who is-- and make sure that it's "not" their sexual vibes that are "really" attracting you. there is this thing called pheremones and they can be mighty powerful.

yes, for me, he'd need a good heart and something between the ears--BUT, that does not negate sexual chemistry. furthermore, to me, sexual chemistry is not so much a bonus as stated above, but rather an integral part of the whole intimate package. if all fails and one gets lonely, i have my group home for the elderly on my back burner. to be truthful though, i hope i never have to resort to it! but also, if my proven loved one, was unable to perform in the course of things, of course i would stick with him and would assume he would "at least" be cuddly. after all, we can buy all sorts of plastic apparatus for the purely sexual function, but no such thing as plastic hugs.
 bdragond1
Joined: 11/27/2008
Msg: 127
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 1/2/2009 12:46:06 PM
It's been a very VERY long time since I've had sex...I'm talking years here. Honestly for me it's more important to be compatable with a person in other ways then sex. If you are truely compatable then the sex thing will work itself out.
 *buzz*
Joined: 6/1/2006
Msg: 128
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 3/27/2009 12:55:53 PM
Why?
Because stimulates ~ body ~ mind ~ soul ~ like nothing else in this world.
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 132
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 7/10/2011 10:38:11 PM
Msg 293


Somewhere around the age of fifty I stopped looking forward to that awkward messy activity, had myself fixed, and became interested in lovemaking. Now we just have FUN in bed, touching, kissing, doing "things", talking, snuggling, whatever. It is not about getting off, it's about enjoying the other person, and generating lots of pleasure.


Well, it could get messy doing it on a space station or bivouacing on mountain side, but in most cases you can keep the whole affair relatively clean.
And contrary to the general belief, many women derive great satisfaction of delivering their man to his final destination.


I had the same problem, we men are not wired for female pleasure. It's very hard to not pull the trigger after a brief session.

That's not what they tell me.
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 137
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 7/23/2011 11:49:29 PM

So I would be interested in any ideas/suggestions as to how to determine this? Is there a way to tell prior to going to bed with someone if they are going to be a patient, caring lover?

You can tell a lot by how the person acts when dancing together.
Also, persons who are very visual and tactile, would get my attention.
 URXO2
Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 138
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 7/24/2011 7:27:57 AM
Herpes, HIV AIDS, Hepatitis, and a new incurable strain of Gonorrhea, not to mention a host of STD's that are curable should make us all think twice before we partake in delight..
I'm celibate by choice, for years now. It easy to get laid it's not so easy to find love...to find the person who has respect for herself, who has her life in-order, is emotionally ready and will except me is no easy task...
SEX is important but within the confines of an exclusive relationship, this attitude is a 180 from my early 20's but the world has changed, me too..
 califcowboy1956
Joined: 11/21/2008
Msg: 141
You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 7/24/2011 3:37:32 PM
what a stupid thread-don't wanna meet sumone like u-sex is the human condition-just better with sumone u love
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 142
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 7/24/2011 7:12:11 PM
Well, I guess the reason is why I date in the first place.

If dating is only for conversation, paying for dinner, suffering rudeness and generally putting up with the flaws of another person, then what's the point?

I know my own flaws, am generally happy and don't owe anyone anything.
To put myself into the dating pool, I have to believe that I am going to meet an attractive woman who will be intimate. Otherwise, I would just give up altogether, just a few of my buddies have done, and spend my time reading.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 145
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 7/27/2011 7:58:13 PM
Some of us decided we wouldn't go without sex whether we were in a LTR or not!
 Perigee123
Joined: 7/14/2009
Msg: 151
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 8/2/2011 8:08:41 PM
One would think that, over time, the fires would cool... however, I believe the actual Need for intimacy increases with age.

The reason is, as we grow older, we have had years to customize ourselves - our likes, our dislikes - to the point at which finding someone who actually substantially matches intellectual interests becomes remote.

"Hi, I'm Fred - I like John Coltrane, BellX-1, Cab Calloway, German Expressionist film, John Ford films and Doctor Who, Camus and Sartre, and The History Channel. Match me."

We've all had years to cultivate personal interests, where traditional "youth" matchmaking is based on cultural commonalities. Amy Winehouse, Shia LaBouf, and Miley Cyrus are examples of wide channels of interest that are not, for youth, polluted with a deeper, wider experience of culture that separates any individual from their peers. ("You like Amy Winehouse? Have you ever heard Janis Joplin? ... Uh. Janis Joplin... She put out a few albums in the late sixties...")

((This does not happen. Which is nice.))

Unless the older generations actively subsume their personal niche interests in favor of lowest-common-denominator cultural anchors ("Oh - you watch "Cake Boss!!? I Watch "Cake Boss!!") finding someone with Similar Interests gets problematic.

So, strangely, sexuality is one of the few bedrock commonalities we have at this age. Bill can like Robert Rodriguez and Betty can like "Hot In Cleveland" - two televisions in two different rooms - and it doesn't effect the relationship as long as they have other commonalities. For older singles those other commonalities do not include history, children, shared experiences... so (at least to my thinking) sexuality is a bedrock commonality that can keep a new relationship going as the other commonalities like shared experience and history are built up.

But that's just my take, and I guess I'm just an old dog. ~grin~
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 152
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 8/2/2011 8:44:37 PM
Msg 314

When people say that they have had no sex, does that mean that they have not pleasured themselves? That would be real abstinence.

And how about pulling a Clinton? Does that count?
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 153
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 8/3/2011 11:42:23 AM

MsMicki:
Some of us decided we wouldn't go without sex whether we were in a LTR or not!


It's nice to know that women such as yourself still exist.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 155
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 8/3/2011 9:40:34 PM

When one sleeps alone by choice then sex is not so important. You may miss it and want it but you learn to do without


Never understood that concept.........
Why would I learn to do without.....when I'm capable of still having it?
 Gastro Man
Joined: 7/25/2005
Msg: 156
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 8/8/2011 12:26:25 AM
For ME, the only reason I'm not having sex is because I'm not currently WITH a woman. If I find a woman that I would choose to date, sex would be a MUST. If you ask a single woman why she uses a dildo, she would say because there is no man in her life. If you put a man in her life that satisfies her sexually, the dildo is going in the closet. Just because sex may not be a part of your life doesn't mean that you no longer WANT it. Some people
go through esoteric journeys in life where they make decisions that many other people could not even fathom making. That happens to be my very situation with dating and sex. I have been celibate for many years now, and it is by CHOICE. I have my private reasons for it, but it is done. Because I have not had sex for many years does not mean that I don't think about it DAILY, or if a woman came into my life that I would not hump her into oblivion, but for now, for ME, sex is something I've chosen to do without.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 157
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 8/8/2011 12:37:26 PM

Gastro_Man:
If you ask a single woman why she uses a dildo, she would say because there is no man in her life. If you put a man in her life that satisfies her sexually, the dildo is going in the closet.


Nah, not necessarily. What's wrong with you and her using the sex toys together? Be imaginative, be adventurous, go for it!
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 158
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 8/14/2011 10:18:52 AM
To all the women here, I apologize to you for the behavior of so much of the male population. Remember, as teens for them it was all about 'how far they could get'. First base, second, etc.. And some of them never grow out of that, for them, it's always primarily about sex first, sex second, sex last. Everything else is unimportant to them. Just be happy they're up front about that. Then you can move on to someone you'd really want to know.
 bellablue69
Joined: 11/24/2008
Msg: 168
You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 9/26/2011 12:04:13 PM
Ok here goes, I am 66 and not a spring chicken anymore...I love sex, really enjoy everything about it but when I haven't found anyone I am not going to sleep around from man to man......I had one man tell me he felt sorry for me because I wasn't getting any...well I say he should speak for himself not for woman.......Good for him if he is getting it......Now I know I am holding out for that special one and guys can think I am crazy or who do I think I am but that doesn't matter. The one it matters to is ME....I want to feel good about my self and the fact I chose not to sleep around is right for me.....I know there is another problem that could be very real and that is when or if I do meet that special one there is a good chance he is on some kind of medication and can't (excuse me) get it up anymore and I have to tell you that would be a big disappointment to me sorry but that is the truth....if you had been with this person for years I can see that is totally ok and there are other things you can do but when your meeting some man and think this could be the right time to partake in the heavenly act of communicating on a deeper level and no action is there would devastate me......Your never to old for sex......Some men have this idea and they find it easy to tell you that whats wrong with you and that you should be enjoying your life more by having sex.....what they really mean is sleep with them and they like giving you reasons why you should....there are things both people on their own can do for themselves so why torture yourself for not getting any.....
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 171
You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 10/2/2011 11:17:14 PM

Well, it goes something like this... lobster is my absolute favorite food but for various reasons, I sometimes go a very long time without it...but um...that doesn't mean I don't drool just thinking about a big, fat, juicy lobster sitting on my plate and no matter how long I go without or how much I enjoy other things in the meantime, it doesn't mean I'm willing to completely write it off the menu just yet;).


I know what you mean about lobster. Not only have I not had lobster in a very long time...I'm not even sure where to look for good lobster.

I did hear that the best lobster can be found on the east coast of Canada, around Nova Scotia. Might be worth the trip...to endulge in some of the most delectable lobster in the world. ummmm....

Maybe you want some shipped?


..mae
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 172
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You've been THIS long without sex, why is it still a solid requirement?
Posted: 10/3/2011 10:41:17 AM

sowrite said:
After reading a lot of the posts, I think I may make it a solid requirement to only date
sex therapists from now on.


Did I mention my degree in "sex therapy"?
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