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 AUTHOR
 thatswhatshesaid
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 12
Never been hit on by women?Page 3 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Wow, this is turning out to be a much more interesting thread than I thought it would be. You guys really miss alot, for a gender that's often accused of thinking about sex every 4 minutes or something! Ubkobalt, I'm feeling seriously sad that you missed out on dating that girl back in high school.


In general, I find that women are too shy. Their idea of hitting on a guy is trying to convince him to hit on her.


It seems like a lot of ladies have figured out that you only recognize a sexual opportunity when it's your idea.
 thatswhatshesaid
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 13
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/25/2008 7:40:19 PM
They can sense danger
 chris1999
Joined: 1/6/2005
Msg: 14
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/25/2008 9:48:45 PM
Something straight foreward. I would like that cause it takes all the guessing out of it so your not wandering if she was hitting on you or just being nice.
 thatswhatshesaid
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 15
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/25/2008 11:23:59 PM
Ha ha ha. Some of you guys, like sosse, have pretty elaborate suggestions.

The thing about girls and their frustrating signals; though sometimes it might be due to ambivolence about showing feelings or worrying about rejection, or just being plain sexually neurotic, sometimes it is because we do the opposite of what "life of leisure" says to do. Instead of thinking "what do men do" women, who get hit on by guys in sometimes unappealing ways, don't want to be presumptuous and commit the same offense by being too aggressive and rude. So we precisely DON'T do what guys do :(

Sure, it's awesome for a guy, (or a girl), if someone you think is sexy, comes right up to you and says "go out with me" but its not very appealing when someone you don't find attractive in the least comes up to you and says, "I live real closeby, wanna hit it?". There's always a spectrum of attractive to unattractive as well as how sexual or how emotional/relationshippy the offer is. Ambiguous flirting is how ladies try to figure out where they stand on these issues.

But we can all stand to be a little more masculine sometimes too :)
 SAIUN
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 16
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 3:39:10 AM

So my question is this, for the guys who have NEVER been hit on. If you were to be hit on by a women, what do you imagine a woman's pick up line would be...and what do you WISH it would be?

Yeah, judging from what I've read here and heard elsewhere, women don't tend to use pick up lines. More subtle forms of flirting that are often missed or misinterpreted seem to be the order of the day.

What I'd wish it to be? A hello and then starting into friendly conversation works just fine for me.
 thatswhatshesaid
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 17
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 10:24:18 AM
^^^^R.A.E, You are covered in cute women in all your profile pics! I think you need hypnosis to overcome your obstacle in seeing when girls flirt with you. You have major ladies and you don't seem to know it.
 TheOneWho_
Joined: 3/22/2007
Msg: 18
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 11:38:39 AM

....is a waste of time for the most part.
Very true!!
However... the alternative is to never approach a woman you'd like to meet, and therefore never meet her.

I did something REALLY stupid a while back and approached a woman I wanted to talk to. I even said to the people I was with "I'm about to go do something really stupid..."










...I've been waking up with her on a regular basis since then.
 DLo!
Joined: 4/23/2008
Msg: 19
view profile
History
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 12:18:13 PM
What I do and what works best on me is real simple! There is no rejection to worry about so you don't have to be nervous. It's really easy. Make an observation on what the guy or girl is doing, wearing, perfume, etc.... make a simple comment about it and then ask an open ended question that isn't a yes/no answer and listen for the tone and length of their response. If the answer is quick and short be pleasant- say ok & have a nice day...go about your biz. If they engage in conversation about your comment and question...keep it going...
Simple? If you need further assistance ...e-mail me- Xo~D'Lo!
 867love
Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 20
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 1:22:25 PM
o/p -pribibly have been hit on by a woman, just didn't realize. -women are quite a bit more subtle about it.
-unless they're really horny -meeeeeoooowwww
 thatswhatshesaid
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 21
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 1:44:50 PM

Guys, how many of you actually notice shoes??? The only time I notice shoes are if they have crazy colors, are great running shoes, or someone mentions them.


I was once at a guy's house and asked him to help me take off my blue suede gladiator sandals, as the buckle was...sigh...just too complicated!

Again, he did not realize I was hitting on him, he just asked me why in the world I was wearing such complicated shoes.

He also did not realize I was hitting on him when later I accidentally spilled cold water on my shirt and had to take it off because I was too cold (yet, perfectly warm to sit around in my camisole).

EVENTUALLY we worked it out, but really...You guys sometimes.
Good thing I'm persistent, even if I'm not obvious enough for you all.

Guess that's why I'm enjoying this thread so much. All you guys that miss billboard size signals are clearly the type I go for.
 DGXR
Joined: 6/11/2008
Msg: 22
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 2:55:52 PM
My ultimate pick-up line is direct honesty with some class. Something like, "Hi, I noticed you and wanted to (ask your name, say hello, find out about you, etc.)" Not only is she initiating the conversation but she is expressing interest, clear enough for me. It hits me hard when someone is just honest and not afraid to just say what they feel or what they are thinking. Also, it's the next milennium so it's OK to go after what you want and people need to evolve beyond the expectation that others will pursue them 100% of the time. You want something? Go after it! Just have a little class.
 DGXR
Joined: 6/11/2008
Msg: 23
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 3:01:01 PM
P.S. A few years ago I got my courage up to ask this girl out, she was working the front counter in her office and there was a cube farm just beyond the counter area. When I finally asked her out, everyone in the back of the room busted out laughing before she even had a chance to answer. Anyway the girl said she was married but I didn't see any ring. Apparently it was all a set-up for their amusement. She was really pretty, I wonder how many suckers they laughed at in a given day.
 Greyfeld
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 24
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History
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 3:51:00 PM
honestly, i don't for a minute believe that any of these guys have "NEVER" been hit on before. Maybe the girls didn't come straight up and say "Hey big boy, wanna come back to my place?" But I wouldn't put it past a number of guys to be completely and utterly oblivious to being hit on... because most girls aren't obvious about it, they drop hints, it's in their body language.

Hell, even my fat ass has been hit on... one of them resulted in a short lived relationship. Another one that comes to mind is when i was dating another girl. It's true what they say though, you get hit on like nobody's business when you're in a relationship XD
 thatswhatshesaid
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 25
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 10:22:04 PM
Oh, I don't know if "seeming shy and insecure" is really a game. I mean even confident people feel that way sometimes. For instance, you are confident in approaching a guy about his interesting conversation, but the thought of sleeping with that same guy before knowing him better brings out a sort of shyness, that is a bit defensive or a protective measure. Its just a matter of confidence and conviction in your feelings to admit that, well some situations make us all shy. Being honest about that is hardly a game.

So, I think approaching directly gets misinterpreted and subtle hints get overlooked. What about repetition of a subtle hint until it becomes increasingly obvious? Guys? You seem to register our "hints" a minute, hour, day, too late. What if a day later, when you realize that asking you to sit on the bed next to her was a girls way of trying to get a kiss from you, she comes along and manages to duplicate the situation, as similarly as possible. What if, after telling you you look nice in red, this girl says to you the next day when you're wearing a blue shirt, I like your shirt, but you look nice in red. Would the call-back to the initial come on get through to you at all?
 Terrible Flirt
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 26
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History
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 10:26:46 PM
Ladies, the non-verbal, non-direct approach can work if you are confident enough to be fairly obvious in their application. I once experienced this with a woman who was a colleague of sorts (worked in the same field as I but not with the same organization). When she first came to the area I asked her out, only to be turned down (she said she was in a long distance thing). I didn't know if that was true or if she was just being nice, but the effect was that I never made any move in that direction afterwards.

Fast forward a few years and we had developed a really good chemistry together, unmistakably flirtatious, but still I'm not gonna go there. One day, though, she took matters into her own hands. We were out with a group of people at an event she had arranged and I was there mostly to support her effort. As it was breaking up I was delayed getting back to my truck as a few of her co-sponsors wanted to speak with me a bit. By the time I did get back to the truck it was just the two of us left and as I was driving by her car she stepped across the road and motioned for me to roll down the window. I figured we were just going to chat about the days events and then I'd be on my way. Well, we did just that but the conversation was being conducted on two entirely different levels all at once. On the surface everything was matter-of-fact, almost mundane. However beneath the surface, non-verbally, she was being quite intense. As I rolled down the window she leaned in close to my face (uncomfortably close), and smiled (a beautiful, seductive smile) as we talked about the days presentation. The pace of her words was slow and her cadence was almost lyrical. The pitch of her voice seemed just a little higher than usual. I could feel the warmth of her words on my face, she was so close. As we spoke to one another she held my gaze steady and unblinking. It was hypnotic. The contrast between the words we were saying to each other and the physical manner in which they were being said was shocking and the effect was riveting, to say the least. Not one word passed between us regarding attraction but I would have felt perfectly justified in kissing her on the spot (the only reason I didn't is because I was involved with someone else at the time). I have to say though, she was no beginner, the girl had serious communication skills.
 lastbat13
Joined: 3/2/2008
Msg: 27
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History
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/26/2008 10:54:06 PM
I have no idea what women do to flirt - but being clear about intent is nice. Something along the lines of "let's go out" or "here's my number, what's yours?" I don't pick up subtle at all.
 _Icon_
Joined: 5/18/2008
Msg: 28
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/27/2008 5:06:15 AM
The guy I am seeing says he gets annoyed when women hit on him. He likes to do the pursuing.

I can vouch for that. He sure caught me by surprise.
 _Icon_
Joined: 5/18/2008
Msg: 29
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/27/2008 6:07:04 AM
Well he didnt do anything weird. He was just very persistent and direct when he asked me out.
When we did go out he was very vocal about his interest. There was no mistaking his intentions.
I was so blown away by his boldness that I had to accept. Besides, he's rather good looking, lol.

It is refreshing to know exactly where I stand. Now I have to decide what to do about it. I'm still undecided. As I get to know him better I see a few things that give me pause, but I am certainly enjoying his attention.

He apparently wouldnt have been interested if I had been the one pursuing him. I am not sure I understand why, but this is what he has told me.
 JadeMuse
Joined: 11/3/2007
Msg: 30
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/27/2008 11:56:47 AM
thatswhatshesaid said:

Ha ha ha. Some of you guys, like sosse, have pretty elaborate suggestions.

The thing about girls and their frustrating signals; though sometimes it might be due to ambivolence about showing feelings or worrying about rejection, or just being plain sexually neurotic, sometimes it is because we do the opposite of what "life of leisure" says to do. Instead of thinking "what do men do" women, who get hit on by guys in sometimes unappealing ways, don't want to be presumptuous and commit the same offense by being too aggressive and rude. So we precisely DON'T do what guys do :(

Sure, it's awesome for a guy, (or a girl), if someone you think is sexy, comes right up to you and says "go out with me" but its not very appealing when someone you don't find attractive in the least comes up to you and says, "I live real closeby, wanna hit it?". There's always a spectrum of attractive to unattractive as well as how sexual or how emotional/relationshippy the offer is. Ambiguous flirting is how ladies try to figure out where they stand on these issues.

But we can all stand to be a little more masculine sometimes too :)


Nicely put, SheSaid!

Yup, pretty subtle here... like introducing myself by telling him in his ear, "I like your shoes," while slipping my name and phone number into his outstretched hand I just reached out to shake in introduction...
...An exit, with a big eye-contact turned-body smile is a good clencher, in case he is a little too shocked at first.

Of course, I've only done that once, and a long time ago...
I think it worked, but I don't really remember!
...I think I got the idea from a movie. shhhh!

Otherwise, I have always just started up a conversation with
that-someone-might-be-interesting-to-talk-to next to me.
That is how a lot of us flirt! SUBTLY!

Oh, and JohnCorbeno?
Uh.... they were hittin' on ya, Hon.
You probably couldn't discern the difference 'cause you are cute 'n' all, and it happens ALL the time to you, but they were hitting on ya.
...Either that, or they thought you were gay and therefore SAFE to flirt with (probably not).

Pick up a book on body language ANYWHERE and do some reading...
Clueless really isn't that sexy.
Adorably in danger of having your cheeks pinched and patted on the head, but not that sexy. SMART is sexy!
A combo of those boy-next-door good looks and a little wisdom? H-O-T!
Reading is fun!
...just FYI.
Good Luck!
 _Icon_
Joined: 5/18/2008
Msg: 31
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/27/2008 2:11:08 PM
Let me ask you how long did you know him before he asked you out? Did this happen in the short amount of time?

About two months, but I had no idea he was interested in me. If I had known I would have been shy. Since I didn't know, I was comfortable and he got to see the real me. Once he asked me out, things happened pretty fast. I was sort of stunned, lol.


And if he had been bold to you say on here, would you have responded the same?

No, I don't think so. There is nothing that happens online that can replace physical attraction.

My job now is to make sure I'm not rationalizing a relationship with this guy simply because I am physically attracted to him. He definitely has some unique quirks, I'd like to know more about him.
 xeot
Joined: 10/25/2007
Msg: 32
view profile
History
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/27/2008 4:45:28 PM
Generally speaking women leave a guy guessing if she's hitting on him or not. That's why there are guys who think women are hitting on them at the slightest thing and those who don't know it even though she's only left a tiny possibility she isn't. The typical result is for the guy to figure it out hours later if at all.

Then there is the fact that just plain teasing and making fun of a guy often crosses over the flirting line so it just blurs things even more. Is she hitting on me? Is she trying to make a joke at my expense? Is she just being friendly... wrong answers are punishable in some states ;)

Post #2... same here... everything from blank stares to 'don't you dare speak to me' expressions. Then when I think one is... well it turns out she's with someone. This is very odd IMO.

Msg: 14 A profile view is the 'flirt'... lol. And it's supposed to be the men that are screwed up they think the slightest thing is 'flirting'?
 ronosaurus
Joined: 7/22/2007
Msg: 33
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 6/29/2008 10:52:13 AM
Never say “never”!!

Two occasions stick in my memory;
1) Some years ago a very attractive lady made eye contact at a singles dance so, I decided to approach her. Her first words were “Do I know you? Or is it that I would like to know you?!” It turned out that we had chatted briefly several years earlier. Her approach led to a “long-term” relationship that later transitioned into a lasting friendship.
2) Another memorable occasion occurred when I was “Dundee’d” on the doorstep of a female friend (ala that memorable scene from “Crocodile Dundee”!!).

All part of losing my boyhood shyness!!
 Droleci
Joined: 4/21/2004
Msg: 34
view profile
History
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:09:56 AM
Ok - so I guess getting a facebook message saying "u r cute" qualifies as the type of being hit on that I would like.

However, they have to follow it up with legitimate interest in getting to know me (ie ask questions, respond intelligently).

The "u r cute" girl told me she was looking for someone single to settle down with, I responded it is usually better to find someone who is SINGLE for that (as opposed to someone who is married) and she took it to mean that I was married... Good grief.
 Droleci
Joined: 4/21/2004
Msg: 35
view profile
History
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:12:25 AM

I originally began reading it when it was suggested by a guy friend to better understand the minds of men. Once I began reading it though, I realized three things. First that it could teach me where men fail and so improve my own game. Second that although I don't see anything wrong with a person improving themselves, I do have a problem with blatant manipulation to further one's own agenda. And lastly that knowledge is power and power I don't have can be used against me. It's a good book that illustrates the old adage, "Know thy Enemy". I'd highly recommend it to all women to read.


Did you finish the book? Did you get to the part where "The Game" stopped working and the moral of the story is that you still need to get lucky, and the transformations are what is important?
 johnayboy88
Joined: 5/31/2008
Msg: 36
Never been hit on by women?
Posted: 7/25/2008 11:56:42 AM
i've been hit on, but not very often.
women should say HI. or SOMETHING at least.
i know know that makes no sense.....maybe i'm stereotyping all women. but girls tend to sit around and wait for love to punch them in the face. if i ask a couple questions and start a conversation. i expect a question in return.
relationships work 2 ways. not just 1.
sorry ladies, its reality. not a fairy tale.
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