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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > I hate it when men do this during lovemaking      Home login  
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 3yearsfromnow
Joined: 5/31/2008
Msg: 26
I hate it when men do this during lovemakingPage 2 of 12    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
are you really a man?
 Nightwing66
Joined: 8/1/2006
Msg: 27
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 4:09:02 AM
I'm sorry...am I the only one who thinks the OP is actually being a bit selfish?


No, you're not......she seems overly focused on herself w/ the 'what's in it for me?' attitude. I wonder if she refuses to let a man perform oral sex on her because there is 'nothing in it for him'?

What ever happened to having the concept of pleasing your partner be a top priority?
 TheStefano
Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 28
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 4:21:37 AM
As an older man, so-called, no it is not something I do nor would I ever dream of doing it, but I havent exactly surveyed men my age on what they do, so I dont know.

I think its really funny, though.
 AtotheL
Joined: 6/2/2008
Msg: 29
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I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 4:42:28 AM
Years back, I was casually chatting with a seemingly decent girl on a local chat-line and she brought up a non-interesting subject of inserting butt plugs while having sex. I quickly hung up the phone. One of my old friends told me that he liked to have his girlfriend pleasure herself while he watched and I had a friend that was addicted to having anal sex with his girlfriend. I also had two friends pressure me to have sex with their girlfriends. There are a lot of kinky people out there and do way more shocking things.

So I'm not shocked nor surprised in light of the story to be honest. Having two bed mates with the exact same fetishes is quite bizarre though.
 newblue1970
Joined: 3/7/2008
Msg: 30
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 5:32:13 AM

Having two bed mates with the exact same fetishes is quite bizarre though.


Pulling out and masturbating to get to orgasm is a "fetish" ?? That must make girl-on-top the most kinky thing in the world!!

OP - something in the sex was lacking stimulation for them. Maybe your vag. isn't as tight as it used to be, or they weren't big enough to get enough friction. (I'm not being critical, just finding possbile reasons) Maybe you were dry and intercourse was hurting them. Or maybe they just really get off on seeing the 'money-shot' on your body. Whatever it was, they were close to orgasm and didn't want to lose it.

I think most guys sometime in their lives have been having sex and had something kept us from coming ( too much stress, the position, an uninterested partner ) Sometimes we switch things around, or take matters into our own hands or wait until next time. As LL said, sex is a 2 way street, sometimes you give, sometimes you receive.

Now, if after they came they went to sleep or left or had no interest in giving you pleasure, then thats very selfish. But if you had already been brought to orgasm, then whats wrong with them making sure they dont miss out?

As always COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION. If they were good guys for you, how could you break it off without talking about it??
 Fun FL girl
Joined: 8/4/2007
Msg: 31
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 6:20:25 AM
Yes, they were older: The first guy was 59; using Viagra. The second guy was 51; he denied using meds.


^^^^^seems like you are looking in the wrong age group JMHO
 opnmydm
Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 32
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 6:50:43 AM
you have been finding alot of selfish lovers..hmm, wonder what the meaning is behind that? sorry about your bad luck..
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 33
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I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 6:53:21 AM
Rhett, no you aren't the only one thinking that way.

My greatest pleasure is to give my partners what they like and need in order to be completely satisfied. First time a guy asked me to finger his a$$ I was like.. um.. eww.. but ok. Now.. the act doesn't do anything for me, but his REACTION to it sure did. There's nothing so arousing as having your partner moaning and wiggling because of something you are doing.

I think many people **** and moan about their partners lack of communication. In both cases these men were very clearly communicating things that would please them. Trust me.. that is a good thing. I love learning about the things that get my partner off.. just means I can do it better the next time and really rock their world.

3yearsfromnow.. you probably did them a favor by ending your relationships with them. I'd like to hear their side to this and see what they say about why they did the things they did. Certainly you expected us all to go.. *ewww.. that's gross.. you did the right thing but not giving them what they asked for.. they were freaks!!*. Well.. it isn't gonna happen that way. You can't only get what you want and expect your partner to never ask for something they'd like as well.
 edster1224
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 34
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 6:56:48 AM
I hate to be cruel, but the only thing I can think of, is that you weren't tight enough for them to get off inside you. I've gotten a woman so wet and loose before that I end up having to get myself off. It isn't everytime, though, just once in a while.

Ed
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 35
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 7:13:09 AM
well Im 51 and I dont understand it either ...if we are intimate im not pulling out till both of us are finished ....and as for the coochie being not so good ..i"ve had 3 kinds in my life ...1 =great ...2= wonderful...3= oh my god!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dont know me thinks that people are stressing the mechanics of sex to much and should learn to savor the intimacy...closeness...and feelings of being truly joined ...touching souls if you will..melting together .... that sex can provide...when pleasing your partner becomes Paramount.rather than living fantasies ...then the fantasies will take care of them selves



I can think of, is that you weren't tight enough for them to get off inside you


then he has got a problem ...if im really into you ...breathing on it will get me off..if im not carefull
 surely im shirley
Joined: 6/14/2008
Msg: 36
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 7:32:14 AM
It sounds like its' all about you. Why didn't you follow his lead and pleasure yourself for a bit...or pleasure him in a way you were comfortable with. These men are obviously comfortable with their sexuality, and its' possible that you are not. He knows his body best, and hopefully you know what you like best. Were you simply 'available' but not 'involved' during the your interaction together? Could be part of the problem.
 myopinion
Joined: 5/19/2008
Msg: 37
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 7:48:33 AM
I have no advice, I have never had this happen, I was just happy to hear that it was not the norm. Seems like there is a bit of a lack of communcation in both of those situations.
 DeeV1n3
Joined: 5/27/2008
Msg: 38
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 8:51:38 AM
like some of the other posters I agree with Laughing Libra. I also think its amazing that you've had two lovers that did this... weird

OP... there is nothing more erotic then turning another person on!! These men asked you to participate in your lovemaking session... now I have to admit, I'm very leary on the anal thing as well, but if your with someone and you know they like anal, there are finger condoms... and of course the the mutual shower that was suggested. Kissing a man's thighs.... omg.... working your way up and down them... uhhhhhhhhhh
Girl, you need to learn to explore more... learn what you like, learn what your man likes.... and then knock his socks off!!!
 PirateOB
Joined: 5/22/2008
Msg: 39
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 8:54:55 AM
Amazing where do people come up with this stuff. I guess you could call it "getting a grip"
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 40
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 9:24:28 AM

there was no pleasure for me.


You remind me of this one chic I went out that had all kinds of men kissing her feet. She was very hot, about an 11. But in bed she sucked. Just like you. I dumped her a$$.
 Stumbled In
Joined: 4/8/2008
Msg: 41
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 10:59:38 AM

Is this a post 50-55ish guy thing or something?

That's funny .... I was thinkin' it might be a highschool thing or something. Some guys never grow up. But after reading the comments, I'm thinkin' it must be a "to each his own" thing. And I agree the odds of two are slim, if she gets three in a row, she deserves some sort of prize.
 sweetcurvyloving
Joined: 6/18/2006
Msg: 42
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 11:08:19 AM
I can understand not being into anally pleasuring him esp if he wasn't fresh. What's wrong with playing with him while he plays with himself - masturbation is a big part of sex and so is oral.
NO pleasure in it for you? Is pleasuring your partner not good enough??
I agree that during a long session of sex, many guys cannot keep it up and need extra stimulation like oral or a hand job to go again. Being a sexual partner is just that - a partnership - everyone must enthusiastically do their part. JMO
 shit.head
Joined: 1/28/2008
Msg: 43
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 11:44:00 AM
pleasure yourself??.....

not everything has to be all about YOU.....maybe you aren't as adventurous as you think, OR, just no compatibility sex-wise...
 nemonucliosis
Joined: 1/1/2008
Msg: 44
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 11:48:08 AM
It's one thing to have limits in the bedroom, but it's another to get upset or frustrated when someone asks you to do something for them. Sounds like you're a bit selfish when it comes to be intimate. Although you may not get pleasure from kissing someone's thighs, it's what the other likes, and isn't being intimate with someone revolve around give and take?.
I'm sure there are things that you ask guys to do for you that they may not necessarily enjoy, but they do it because they know it gives you pleasure. Seems as though you're more concerned about what you're getting out of sex rather what it means for both of you.
 2nutty
Joined: 12/17/2007
Msg: 45
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 12:25:40 PM
Ok...here we go...I am now jumping on my soapbox...

First off...I will sat that my bf and I pleasure ourselves with help in other places from the other. Here's my thing...never had a big O with a man until him. Now I am addicted! Sometimes I can come very easily other times it takes a long time and I get all tender. Therefore I just finish myself because I know EXACTLY what feels fabulous! ( and what hurts) And he gets to explore and kiss me all over....

Now with him...he has to stop because he had knee surgery and his knees hurt like hell after a bit. Yes there are other posistions, but for various reasons we like the ones that use the knees the most. I will admit that the first time it happened I was shocked, but hey, it was also our first time together and he was nervous and so was I and it was just weird...but I saw the benefits and now I think its great! He can last forever and I finally just have to beg him to stop!!!! Being a good lover doesn't have anything to do with if they finish in you or beside you...just that you both get the cookie!!! hehe!

OP: I really wish that you were more openminded. You would have such a better time! The more turned on I make my man, the hotter I get!!!! And the fact that I am in love makes it so much better....
 DeeV1n3
Joined: 5/27/2008
Msg: 46
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 12:38:09 PM

OP: I really wish that you were more openminded. You would have such a better time! The more turned on I make my man, the hotter I get!!!! And the fact that I am in love makes it so much better....


Very nicely put 2nutty!!
 shimbo
Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 47
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 12:39:58 PM

But in bed she sucked. Just like you. I dumped her a$$.


Did you at least poke a finger in it before you dumped it?
 obmij2
Joined: 6/17/2008
Msg: 48
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I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 12:55:44 PM
Yea um one guy pulls that and it's something strange about him but two different guys unable to achieve orgasm during sex with you ...????? You might want to stop pointing your fingers at others and consider what you may be doing wrong. Just my opinion based on the facts as you stated them.
 Ninki
Joined: 4/11/2005
Msg: 49
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 2:02:39 PM

I wonder how long you dated these guys before becoming intimate? Sounds like you needed to spend more time getting to know one another.


My thoughts exactly. It seems to me that most people today get intimate way too soon and then wonder why the sex doesn't work out.

N.
 kissable0325
Joined: 10/15/2007
Msg: 50
I hate it when men do this during lovemaking
Posted: 7/1/2008 2:14:28 PM

What's up with this? don't men want a woman any more? You don't need me around to pleasure yourself. Next time it happens I will go watch TV.


Stop dating guys who learned all their lovemaking skills from pornos!
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