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 ColonelIngus
Joined: 9/16/2007
Msg: 153
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Do hearts harden with age?Page 4 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
Geez, if this thread gets any more sentimental and syrupy they're going to be required by the FDA to post a warning label, as it could make even healthy people go into complete diabetic shock.
 rustytraveler
Joined: 4/30/2007
Msg: 154
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/22/2008 4:56:20 AM
So what's wrong with that?
It's Xmas and it's not a crime to still have a heart even tho it's fashionable not to.... and where does that get you? A lot of innocuous sex with other fearful people also afraid to sample All the possibilities that 2 people are capable of.... if they just stopped putting up defenses against it.
 rustytraveler
Joined: 4/30/2007
Msg: 155
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/22/2008 5:02:45 AM
There is an Indian Proverb that says:

That everyone is a house with four rooms.

A physical
An emotional
A mental
and a spiritual

Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time.
But unless we go into every room, every day, even if only to keep it aired,
We are not a complete person.

Makes sense to me... and easier than taking cholesterol medicine or living on a straight work or sex diet ;-)
... aaaand keeps the heart lubricated and functioning.
 OldFolkie
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 157
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/22/2008 10:21:56 PM
^^^^ What she said.

We do grow as we age, as we deal with the emotional blows life throws at us. We either learn to to grow with the lessons we've learned, or we give up...let our souls die, become "curmudgeons" of either gender.

I choose to believe that that we can learn and grow.
 CompletelyDone
Joined: 8/12/2007
Msg: 158
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/22/2008 10:23:39 PM

There is an Indian Proverb that says:

That everyone is a house with four rooms.

A physical
An emotional
A mental
and a spiritual

Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time.
But unless we go into every room, every day, even if only to keep it aired,
We are not a complete person.


I think that's awesome RT! Thanks for sharing it!
 rustytraveler
Joined: 4/30/2007
Msg: 159
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/22/2008 10:42:13 PM
Silken to you and yours . The Grump
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 160
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/22/2008 11:01:05 PM
Rusty...quite a number of years ago, I spent a weekend at Nakoda Lodge in Kanaskis Country, not far from where I live. The weekend was more of a spiritual retreat hosted by many Elders from my community. That weekend was the *first* of many journeys of self-discovery that I participated in, including my first "sweat" a spiritual cleansing

Anyhow....I remember one Elder in particular spoke to us about creating our own dwellings...and there are many...... The house of anger, the house of despair, the house of self-pity, the house of hope, the house of forgiveness and so forth. Since we created those dwellings, we can choose to stay in them for as long as we wish.....or we can leave these dwellings.....it's our choice....and with that he said, " So which dwelling do you choose to stay in?"

Those words moved me, I think about what he said everytime I get to feeling sorry for myself, or angry....I think of what "house" I want to be in....and that keeps my heart from hardening.

...maeflowers
 tallyover
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 161
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/23/2008 4:49:24 AM
I don't think hearts harden with age, in fact just the opposite in my case. I'm much more romantic, patient, charitable, understanding, and compassionate now. Many of us were too busy in our younger days to take time to smell the roses.
 rustytraveler
Joined: 4/30/2007
Msg: 162
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/23/2008 5:08:22 AM
I hear ya Mae.....and that definitely works in the REAL world with real people......
But HERE, you'd have to set me in a field of sage and set it smokin' !
I'm sure I'm gettin' some pleasure factor out of it however, must be the increased blood flow .
 blondblueyed
Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 163
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/23/2008 5:41:25 AM
I went to Busch Gardens on Saturday with my great nephew, all the shows had a Christmas theme and I was boo hooing all day. At one show there was a Santa asking all the children in the audience to come up on stage with him as he sang "Thank God for Kids" just about all of us were melting.
 santa3129
Joined: 10/13/2008
Msg: 164
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/23/2008 10:51:19 AM
Only if you let it. It's the mind that needs it's reset button pushed!
 Sapphireeyes
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 166
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/23/2008 3:48:42 PM
I think love is a gift, you are suppose to give it away............to many want to be LOVED vs loving...

Recently a friend of mine was talking about his ex-wife and how he still loves her, if only she wasnt so selfish..blah blah blah...

I told him Love is accepting who someone is to us...not how we want them to be to us....

I think with maturity we get to see our prior mistakes, where you meet someone and then you think well if this happens or if they do that or if i can convince them to do this...blah blah blah...vs understanding we have to accept who they are to really have love.

I told him to expect nothing from her and then anything he gets from her would be considered a gift.
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 167
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/23/2008 4:56:02 PM
I can't speak for women, but according to medical literature, most men mellow with increased-age. Or put it another way, with decreased levels of testosterone, most body parts get somewhat softer.
 lindy_3333
Joined: 3/6/2006
Msg: 171
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 12/28/2008 2:11:12 PM
Hearts harden due to negative things. It is an emotional experience due to negative experiences in life. Some one is hurt and chooses to be hardened by it, seeking revenge, or becomes angry, mean or nasty, lacking empathy. It is an imbalance of the soul for many reasons. But, one doesn't have to chose to stay there in that condition. The tale of Scrooge proves that. He was resentful and lonely and angry. It took a journey of Christmas past, present, and future to show him, but he chose to change and did and was much more happier for it.

It is best to avoid negativity. It only creates more of the same. Wisdom comes from experiences and should teach us that being hard-hearted isn't a wise chose.
 professora
Joined: 7/28/2008
Msg: 174
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 2/17/2009 9:34:01 PM
Its not a hardened heart. Lets face it.... we have less time so it makes sense to move on promptly.
 Brownlady1953
Joined: 12/12/2008
Msg: 175
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 2/19/2009 8:01:36 AM
It's called "scar tissue...."
 kpooks
Joined: 12/23/2008
Msg: 178
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 2/19/2009 9:32:59 PM
I have felt my heart open, get hurt and harden, then repeat this process more times than I care to remember, but I always try to make myself vulnerable and open to life's sweetness again, because what the hell else is there...besides death? A hard heart is a protected heart but also a closed heart. And it is also a heart that is prone to coronary disease.
 Zephyr2553
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 179
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 2/19/2009 10:25:13 PM
Not at all. I feel and hurt and get all giddy and feel hot and bothered and heart flutters and giggle and flirt and all that good stuff.

I'm probably more so that way than I was at 20. Don't listen to the hard hearted cynical people.

Feel, breathe, enjoy all your senses.
 tallyover
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 180
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 2/20/2009 2:38:22 AM

if "growing up" means a hard cynical outlook on life I'll pass. I want romance, want that special feeling, want the sun to shine brighter, the air to be fresher ,without that what's the point????
I agree................what's the point. If my optimism makes me naive I'm willing to accept the consequences. I don't want to become hard hearted. Smiles, romance, passion, companionship, laughter take priority.
Remember : If you don't have a "Smile" on your face, and a "Song" in your heart
Your just a sour old fart!!!!!!!!!!!
 junipermoon
Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 181
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 2/20/2009 5:08:07 AM
as i evolve, i think i began to process things differently. i now know how to 'unlearn' the thought mechanisms that made life difficult 20 years ago. and i've realized that my consciousness has matured . i see that my existing perception of the losses that caused me grief can alter if i allow it to. i can see the larger picture with objectivity.

this shift in vision gives me a sense of harmony with circumstances and events that would have sent me into a tailspin years ago. and i feel more comfortable like this than i would if i had huge, dramatic, emotional reactions to anything that comes my way.

i once knew someone who could sob for hours ( literally) about every perceived injustice inflicted upon her from childhood on. i could never live like that. abusing alcohol on a daily basis, wallowing in self-pity, blaming others for one's own situation, insisting that someone else advise and counsel while simultaneously abusing and berating the advice ~ these behaviors indicate an unevolved spirit.

guage the emotional reaction in comparison to the events leading up to it. if it seems out of proportion, we have a problem. if it happens once in a while, we need to look at it more closely. if it becomes a way of life, we need to realize that we have a much larger issue.
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 185
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 2/21/2009 10:09:52 PM

if "growing up" means a hard cynical outlook on life I'll pass. I want romance, want that special feeling, want the sun to shine brighter, the air to be fresher ,without that what's the point????



.....I pray I never become so hard and cynical that I forget what it's like to be in love again.

...maeflowers
 Rythmn
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 191
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Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 2/24/2009 11:01:16 AM
i believe in the energy that is described in the chakras of eastern meditation. my heart is usually open, i just close down or get stuck near the other energy centers. they, in turn, influence the strength of my heart. the trick is to balance and let the energy flow through. it takes a strong person to be vulnerable.
 Zephyr2553
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 192
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 2/24/2009 11:09:05 AM
Hearts soften with age. They have seen and heard and felt, they have grown to accommodate a world of people.

The arteries harden with age....lol, but the deepness, the richness of love and acceptance and tolerance, is fuller with age.
 Notdesper8atall
Joined: 6/27/2008
Msg: 193
Do hearts harden with age?
Posted: 3/1/2009 5:52:15 PM
I personally believe that if your heart has hardened with age you really wouldn't be here looking to share it with someone else. Those who post on here with bitterness and resentment arent the ones who I would look to for much of anything let alone advice. These are the folks who have been hurt but havent figured out how to get over the pain and I wish them recovery but I wont buy into the bitterness.
I read of folks who say they have put up walls and such but in reality we have all been hurt before so we tread cautiously..but we still tread. I do believe in our youth we were wide eyed and didnt yet know what the loss of a great love would do to us so we rushed in where some angels and a few devils feared to tread..lol.
Now we walk cautiously. For example, introductions via the internet, emails and then phone calls and a possible meeting in a safe place. So I dont really see it as a harden heart just a more careful one. After all we all want a joyous heart not one pained by another loss.
Do I sometimes feel loss at past romances .. I would say yes I do. I dont dwell on it but all our experiences in life mold us into who we have become. The lessons we learn are important but what we do with the knowledge is the key. As long as you are alive you can still love.
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