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 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 107
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?Page 2 of 23    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23)
Because they want to feel better for realising that even being single, you are still happier than them. You REALLY don't know what goes on behind some of those closed doors. You don't want to, either.
 Kawaii-to-kowai
Joined: 6/29/2007
Msg: 109
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 7/8/2007 5:57:42 PM
Depends on who you talk to, I suppose. Now, I think more and more people of my own generation and thereafter are open to those who decide to be childfree. Quite frankly, I think of the opportunity to raise kids as something of an honor, responsibility, and priveledge in today's society. Although I am amazed at single parents being able to raise their kids, I could not willingly bring a child into this world without a partner to balance out the parenting. I also would want to provide the very best possible so that my child would not suffer due to financial woes that trouble so many families. Until I can provide a safe and healthy environment and have found my life partner, it's just out of the question. And so far as Mr. Right, well. He is a ninja, because I have yet to even get a glimpse of him. :P

And yes, I'm over 30. I didn't "choose" to be single. I chose to live life a day at a time. I just haven't met that right man yet, and since I'm not the dating sort, typically, well, it's been a limited selection. I'm trying to work on being open to dating, now, but by no means does being childfree and over 30 make me a failure. u.u

Luckily, Mom isn't the sort to pout over no grandkids from her daughter. :)
 junipermoon
Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 115
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 8/27/2007 6:44:47 AM
i don't call them 'failures. '

i call them 'bullet dodgers.'
 miss pisces
Joined: 8/3/2007
Msg: 129
WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 9/30/2007 3:40:27 PM
Who says I’m a failure just because I’m single and don’t have any kids? Heck, I don’t even want kids of my own. Also, I would rather be single than in an unsatisfactory relationship.

I’m not a failure, I’m just smart
 feathersan
Joined: 6/1/2007
Msg: 138
WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 10/8/2007 7:53:12 PM
there was a billboard right over downtown Salt Lake City last year from UtahBrides.com and it stated "Get Married--Buy a House." Young girls who read that will feel like the only way to acheive anything is to get married. Sad, really.
Michael
 Keithslegacy
Joined: 6/20/2007
Msg: 147
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 10/12/2007 11:23:31 PM

WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?


Why? Programming.....that's why. You are all programed to believe that.

Why? Because the sooner you get pregnant and have kids....the more diapers and extra food, clothes, care, ect, ect you're buying. You're helping to make all those companies MONEY, because if you decide not to have kids.....you're not going to need to buy most/all that stuff.

Plus, having kids keeps you in line.....keeps you going to work.....I mean, one can Rage Against the Machine when one is flying solo.......kind of hard to keep doing that when you suddenly have 2+ extra mouths to feed....time to go get that nice factory job that will keep you nice and docile until you're too old and beaten to be a threat to anyone anyways.

It helps the Establsihment and the Economy, so the media programs women with methods both subtle and not so subtle to think "I need to meet someone and have kids as soon as possible," and most people fall for it.
 Keithslegacy
Joined: 6/20/2007
Msg: 150
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 10/14/2007 12:55:52 AM

Keith...

I wish you lived closer. I would love to meet you.


Thanks....and that would be cool. You sound like a Really interesting person.
 Keithslegacy
Joined: 6/20/2007
Msg: 154
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 10/18/2007 11:40:36 PM

Hmmm... a "really interesting person"? Yeah, that seems to be the same comment I always get from men... polite, vague and hinting at androgynous perception. Hee-hee-hee. [\quote]

Well, few of us let the Death Star defenses down at first talk.
 Anzia
Joined: 8/8/2007
Msg: 159
WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 10/20/2007 8:28:41 PM
What the heck are you talking about up there? Not all women/people talk about themselves all the time. Also, not all people make assumptions about others, like you're doing. Furthermore, how would moving to another country "cure" a woman of her childless thirty-hood? If so, what if we don't want that cure? I read your posts and I don't understand your point(s). The question at hand is "Why are women over 30 a failure when they are single and childless?" This last response makes me want to "scratch my head" in wonder, too.

mytfineman - Thank you for sticking up for your sister! My brothers stick up for me, too. THANK YOU!

Responding to POST #134
Cosmicchild31 - I just read your response from July 7th. Spell-check or not, that was an amazing piece of writing!!!! You proved your point well. That little piece should be in a woman's magazine!
 orchidtigress
Joined: 1/18/2007
Msg: 160
WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 10/20/2007 8:29:01 PM
So guess women like Oprah and Mother Teresa who have bettered the world in many ways, and many others, are the world's biggest losers! I have no intetion of getting married or having kids...yet live a very fulfilling life! People who only believe life ONLY consists of marriage and kids are off balance and have missed out on entire portions of their own lives and self-development!
 sexybrunette333
Joined: 10/16/2007
Msg: 162
WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 10/21/2007 9:57:18 AM
I don't consider myself a failure. I have my own house, a good job, great friends etc. I know some women that are married, have kids and are miserable. I would rather be single with no kids than be married and miserable.
 FunAngler1970
Joined: 8/18/2007
Msg: 163
WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 10/21/2007 5:59:37 PM
Don't know about other guys but i'm different i usually won't ask a woman out if she doesn't have kids unless i know she know i have 4 and we have gotten to know each other for a while but this is not ment as a bad thing ya know. Just not as much in common. My sister and brother have no kids for different reasons and i can never recall a time i looked at them as they did anything wrong or because they didn't want kids like their lives weren't complete ya know.Hey girl why do you care what people think when they judge you anyway ya know
 pjay70
Joined: 2/2/2007
Msg: 174
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 12/27/2007 4:46:55 PM
I have made the decision not to have children. I was married, am now divorced, and am not opposed to marrying again but will also lead a full life if I stay single. Yes, there are many women who want to be a mother. But there are also many who have a child because they are expected to. I have never wanted children. I do not consider myself a failure at all. I have a good job, own my own home, and have good friends. I'm a good person and think nothing about stopping to help strangers. I have a college education. If someone thinks I am a failure because I'm (almost) 38 and do not have children, they do not know me at all. They are entitled to their opinion, but they are wrong.
 instride
Joined: 12/14/2007
Msg: 180
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 12/30/2007 7:38:51 AM
That would be almost unimaginable. Having a good woman to make a life with,who has no kids.
Where can I find her?
 Urbanessa
Joined: 8/15/2007
Msg: 186
WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 12/31/2007 1:04:22 PM

I'm 38, single, never married, without kids

Are you real? Honestly? OR have you just made yourself up?


and I can't seem to find a single candidate over the age of 30 in these here parts (lol) that can say the same...well unless she looks like she fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch (I keeeeed, I keeeeed)
.

I guess I must have fallen out of the tree, then. Damn.
Oh, no, wait, you're talking about CALIFORNIAN women.


It's gotten so bad for me that I don't attend family functions and dread the inevitable question that comes up with nearly ever person I come in contact with for any extended amount of time "what's wrong with you that you don't have a wife or kids???"

Hopefully, you ask back "What is wrong with you that you HAVE?"
Studies show that childless couples are happier than couples with kids. Go figure.


Then I add how I won't be with a smoker and well...I think I have a 1 in 10 million chance of finding myself a date *sigh*


Probably closer to one in a hundred. So don't give up: She might be only 99 bad dates away...

Apparently I missed the boat or perhaps I just need to go back to the mail order bride sites (j/k)...

Are there actually mail order GROOMS as well? Could anyone send me a catalogue? Please?

As for the OP's question:
Those people implying women who managed not to fall for the "kids give you nothing but joy" lies and therefore avoided the brat trap are a failure are usually jealous and therefore try to make you as miserable as they are. At least that is my theory. I have yet to meet a mother that is happier with kids than she was before having them.
 Urbanessa
Joined: 8/15/2007
Msg: 188
WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 12/31/2007 1:53:08 PM

Ask one of those women if she would change having kids

I have. Several times actually. And I guess you wouldn't like what they had to say.

As a matter of fact I only know two mothers that wouldn't trade their kids in for an independent and travel-filled life like mine, and those two mothers have managed to keep their careers going while having kids. Not one of the stay-at-home moms I've talked to about this issue was truly happy with what she had.
 Babe0304
Joined: 7/28/2007
Msg: 193
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 1/1/2008 4:39:37 PM
Amen. I think that all single women fall trap to what society thinks that we should be married, barefoot and pregnant. When we don't live up to these norms, we soometimes label ourselves as failures when we sometimes have alot more going for us than we think. In reality, we get to live life according to our own beat... vacations, dates, enjoying time with friends and loved ones and basically living according to our own clock with no restrictions on our time. Married people are often envious of our single lifestyle but some were not strong enough to choose to live it. After all, what's worse being single or being married to someone that you really dont want to be with to begin with. I definitely think being single is not easy and can be very lonely... but I'm trying to get use to the fact that it may not be in the cards for me to get married or I may not find the one to have a long term relationship with. I'm trying not to give up hope but reality may be that I may have to live life Happily Ever After SINGLE!
 Babe0304
Joined: 7/28/2007
Msg: 195
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 1/3/2008 7:04:52 PM
Reply To: Taz in Love
Thank you so much sweetie for your very kind words. It's so nice to hear kind words from other women who are still searching to find the one and experiencing the same dating dilemma's and experiences that I am. It's easy to sometimes give up hope and I really appreciate your words... as YES the clock is ticking Lol Good Luck to you in your search!
 gemini29
Joined: 5/21/2006
Msg: 196
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 1/5/2008 4:29:05 AM
I love this thread.

All my life I have heard that I MUST get married and MUST have kids. So got married at a very young age and bolted at 27. It was really bad and I just couldn't take it anymore. So here I am, relieved to be single again, grateful that I did not have any children while married, happily acquiring my own assets, travelling, doing well a professional career, getting more education, starting my own business, and what do I hear from family? 'Yes, you are doing well, but you should focus on finding a man and getting married again'; 'when are you going to give your parents some grandchildren? That is your purpose, you know'; 'maybe if you changed this or did that or slowed down with your career you could find someone'; 'maybe you should have tried to get pregnant before you got divorced so that you would have a child to love' (WTF???)

Even though I am much happier being single, at first I was still feeling insecure about it. That's changed. Out of all the married couples I know, I see only one that is truly happy. One out of at least 50. Thanks, but I'll take my time to select wisely, and if I remain single for the rest of my life, that's fine. I'm very happy with it. As for kids, eh. if I have them I have them. Now is not a good time, and I refuse to have them to make others happy.
 MetalVixxn
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 199
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 1/9/2008 8:31:57 PM
We-ell. I'll be turning the big 3-0 soon and I don't feel like I am a failure at all for being single and childless, in fact, I feel like a success story!!!
 lonesome wonderer
Joined: 12/26/2007
Msg: 200
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 1/10/2008 6:58:23 PM
without going through all 12 pages i'm going to say what i want to say even though it may have been said but worded differently.

women over 30, single, and childless are NOT failures, they are those women that decided to put education and careers over having families of their own. there's nothing wrong with a woman that's over 30, single, and childless. hell, the only thing that some guys might find wrong is they might either be a lot more smarter than they are and or have a bigger bank account.

also, not everyone is a moron, even after having kids.
 MetalVixxn
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 201
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WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 1/11/2008 7:53:53 PM
bona dea- cheers!!

it does seem like a lot of my friends with kids ended up with morons~
my friend and i were just saying last night how everyone we know that is married and/or has kids didnt plan it that way. not one of 'em got married and then planned out their kids. and all of them got preggers by accident and got stuck with the guy. i think that's really sad.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 202
WHY ARE WOMEN OVER 30 A FAILURE WHEN THEY ARE SINGLE AND CHILDLESS?
Posted: 1/13/2008 12:04:12 PM
because you are different and they cannot understand how you cannot possibly want to be a non conformist and not date them since you are the weird one since you are single with no kids not divorced with kids. either that or control issues .
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