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 abandonedbycupid
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 76
He brought his Fanny with him...Page 4 of 21    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21)
Okay. I will find a man who doesn't mind an overage woman wearing a plaid skirt. Lol. I do feel like I'm in prep school again at times. My former date obviously has some lovely options of women who don't mind fanny packs...

As for me, quite clearly, fanny packs aren't my cup of tea.

He was a great guy and I do hope he nabs someone who has different taste. The fanny pack at a nice restaurant was more of an indication than the only problem. As I said before, every good guy is not the guy for me. As I said before, I'm sure that my investment in my appearance who have put him off eventually, as well.

We had a good time. It didn't end on a bad note, hence the invitation for a second date. I declined but maybe one of you now has the chance to accept.

Good luck (said in a very nice way).
 JohnSeven
Joined: 7/1/2008
Msg: 77
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 8:09:56 AM
nothing wrong with plaid in certain situations, lol. (I like your last 2 pics better though...black is a good color for you)
 Nightwing66
Joined: 8/1/2006
Msg: 78
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 8:18:59 AM

Also...the poster who compared it to strapping a back pack on his scoot...totally different...saddle bags are SO not fanny packs


Agreed! I was just making the point that 'closet space' in a regular guys wardrobe is at SUCH a premium that it has spawned such goofy fashion remedies as the fanny pack. So I can imagine the necessity of one.....if not the fortitude required to wear such.

The OP seems like a good egg, so I'll cut her some slack for the (dis)missal. But I do think her victory dance & "Nyah Nyah" cheer at the end of the evening was a bit much.

By that time the guy probably just wanted to go home & catch some A-Team reruns.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 79
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 8:22:13 AM

Was I too shallow? Has anyone else met up with someone who had some sort of oddity that seemed small but was a total dealbreaker?


~OP~ LMAO. Unless he's sporting a mullet and parachute pants, he should really just go with the man-purse. At least those are over the shoulder, not around the waist. I was embarrassed about a year ago with the same scenerio, but it wasn't a man ~ it was my Granny.

It's not shallow, you did stick out the date and you did at least make a funny, which I thought was hilarious. Maybe he has no sense of humor. Well, no, he's sporting a Fanny. Better luck next time.
 abandonedbycupid
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 80
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 8:32:34 AM
More for you to chew on... I have one of those t-shirts that is painted to look like a tuxedo. Rose in the fake pocket and all.... and I like it... Lol...
 Wildman46
Joined: 6/4/2008
Msg: 81
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 8:40:09 AM
" I have one of those t-shirts that is painted to look like a tuxedo. rose in the fake pocket and all... and I like it...LOL"

Kind of hypocritical, Don't you think?. Instead of dismissing a guy that you had great chemistry with just because of a "fanny pack" . I wonder if it would have been better to communicate your displeasure to him, maybe ask him why he carried it around, if it's not a good enough reason to suit you, then ask him not to bring it while out with you.

I'm looking at your profile pictures, I see some poka dots( my granny stopped wearing poka dots 30 years ago) I 'm expecting kids or old people to be wearing poka dots, not a 29 year old woman that claims to be so fashion conscious. And i see some plaid.

Maybe the Ops time might be better served dealing with her own Fashion issues before dismissing others for THEIR lack of style.
 repair-guy
Joined: 4/10/2008
Msg: 82
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 8:42:28 AM
Funny story abc... please post more of your adventures.
 Mr Happy Pants
Joined: 7/12/2008
Msg: 83
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 8:42:41 AM
Whether it's a shallow reason to ditch someone, doesn't matter. The fact is, you weren't cool with it. So, he's not the man the for ya. You have every right to decide what your dealbreakers are, what you want in your life and what you don't. A fanny pack it is. lol

I like the plaid skirt.
 achickwithtools
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 84
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 9:03:28 AM
I'm with Mr. Happy Pants
We can all pretend we aren't shallow in some way but we all have dealbreakers!! For me it would be sweatpants and/or velcro shoes on a date...mainly because it would remind me of my dad!!
 SueCat51
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 85
view profile
History
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 9:34:22 AM
OP - I've never understood why they call them "fanny" packs, certainly you can't sit on it. Go figure. Don't know if it's tacky, for me, it wouldn't be a deal breaker. Now, if my date showed up with a purse, for me that's a deal breaker.
 iris43
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 86
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 9:36:43 AM
I'm not sure if it would have bothered me or not.....if he had a great confident attitude and didn't a rats azz what people thought then perhaps I wouldn't have cared either.
If he was great guy and their was an attraction I don't think it would have been a deal breaker.
 MrD4Thee
Joined: 1/27/2008
Msg: 87
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 10:09:43 AM
One last item BTW,
Being in healthcare to some extent, I wonder if the OP is aware that most people who require or use a insulin pump carry them in a fanny pack. It is generally where the line is located and they are able to go out in public with alot less stares and judgements for people seeing the particular medical device. That would totally put a different spin on why the gentleman was out while wearing this fashion "mistake". If so, he really was a good egg at being out with OP and taking all her comments with a grain of salt.
Did he have a massive sugar laden desert at the end of your date, might be a clue. . .
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 88
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 11:33:32 AM
We can all pretend we aren't shallow in some way but we all have dealbreakers!! For me it would be sweatpants and/or velcro shoes on a date...mainly because it would remind me of my dad!!

I'll never forget getting my step-father his first pair of lace-up Nikes (lace up...LMAO...like he was four. ) I think I'd do better with the OP's tuxedo shirt, I think she could pull that off.

Mr.D4: Don't you think he would have clearly stated it was for medical purposes had that been the case? Maybe not, but his 2nd date offer to go purchase a new one sort of insinuates he was quite happy with his Fanny and it was there to stay. No matter what his reasons for this ~ the OP was uncomfortable. Probably how I'd feel if Mr. New to Me showed up with sandals and white socks mid way up his calves. That's just a no go for me personally. We all have our little secret "ewwwww" things. JMO
 Fight Naked
Joined: 7/11/2008
Msg: 89
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 11:49:09 AM
Guys figure out your deal breakers are and go with it.

But if the only thing you hate is a fanny pack... just go buy him one you like.

You can re-dress a guy.. Just be gently, kind, be presuaive, be sneaky, make him think it is his idea. Do is slow, many of us hate change.... slow steady changes... :)

If this is the only thing, strike a deal. I will change one thing and you change one thing. Make sure they are madly in love with you and take your fanny pac back.

One you are madly in love a fanny pac is nothing.
 stillclock
Joined: 1/1/2008
Msg: 90
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 11:54:05 AM
no, i get it.

we all get it, really. i honestly believe we all have a couple of little things like that we can't get over or look past...

me?

it's socks and sandals.

or grey tube socks.

or black socks with shorts.

they're all just so....wrong.

a
 iris43
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 91
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 12:30:16 PM
Ok a couple of things I couldn't get past would be

Yes socks and sandals

Sweat pants with the elastic at the ankles.... not even around the house is ok...NO WAY

Jeans with sneakers where the tongue of the sneaker is half way up the pant leg....again never in a million years.
 Snake-charmer
Joined: 2/13/2008
Msg: 92
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 12:56:09 PM
I can relate to the OP- the fanny pack represents the kind of person the guy is- a kind of person who just isn't going to mesh well with her in the long run- that's the point.

She cares about how a guy carries himself and how he keeps up with his appearance and shows himself to the world. She wants someone modern and put together.

Her date makes a point of NOT caring about what is currently hip and may rock the fanny pack to show his disdain for a world obsessed with style (or he may just be clueless).

One does wonder if he would have shown up for the next date in those printed surfer pants from the early 90's that look like pajama bottoms and a bandana.

Me- I wouldn't go for either of these types. I'm not attracted to the suit guys/GQ guys. I need the salt of the earth, ultra masculine dude who pretty much lives in jeans and t-shirts when he's not out fighting fires or going to Brazillian ju-jitsu classes.

It's just about knowing who you're compatible with and attracted to. It doesn't make her shallow, just makes her realistic.
 jlee1224
Joined: 5/17/2008
Msg: 93
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 1:40:52 PM
No, you were not too shallow! OMG...a fanny pack? I had a date show up in a Smokey the Bear t-shirt, cut off jeans, TUBE socks and sneakers once!
Sorry, I already taught four sons how to dress and stay up on fashion, I dont' need another one....too much work!
Not to mention the embarassment!
I am impressed with the joke you came up with...you go girl!
 FLGator66
Joined: 4/15/2007
Msg: 94
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 1:50:27 PM
Oh come on people!!! The guy wore a theme park/tourist accessory to a nice resturant...on a 1st date! Now, unless that resturant was in Epcot, The Magic Kingdom, Six Flags or any other place like that and he was also wearing a Hawaiian shirt and sandals, it's a HUGE faux pas. I'm betting this is not the 1st time he's been faced with someone having an issue with his "fanny", nor will it be his last.
 VVendy
Joined: 6/7/2008
Msg: 95
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 2:02:51 PM
I use a fanny pack when my back or shoulder is bothering me. It is ok to take care of yourself by not stressing out your body. Give me his number.
 cardsandchips
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 96
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 2:14:39 PM
That's a riot!

I would not be caught dead wearing a fanny pack. I always figured these guys might as well carry a purse (very gay).

When I first moved to Las Vegas I could not get over how many men wore tons of jewelry and how many others wore fanny packs. It seems to be accepted out there.

But I do like to go out in high heels sometimes, what guy doesn't?
 LoverFighterWriter
Joined: 2/26/2008
Msg: 97
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 2:23:03 PM
At first glance, rejecting someone because he wears a fanny pack may seem shallow, but really there's more to it than that. Think about it like this: what does the fact that he wore a fanny pack tell you about his personality? It shows he lacks basic social skills - specifically, he doesn't understand and therefore can't conform to simple rules of fashion. He's totally out of touch with the world around him. It would be different if he understood that wearing a fanny pack was uncool and he did it anyway because he's a rebel and he doesn't care what other people think of him, but from what you've said it's obvious that he's just plain oblivious to what other people think. He just doesn't "get it". Wearing a fanny pack is surely just the tip of the iceberg.

I think it's completely reasonable to want to be with someone who understands his own culture and the people around him, someone who's socially aware, someone who notices what's going on around him. A person who fails to understand how he relates to the rest of the world is unlikely to be able to relate well to you. Rejecting him was not too shallow. It was good common sense.
 KountMacula
Joined: 12/15/2006
Msg: 98
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 3:20:58 PM
You're not abandoned by cupid. It's just that everytime he comes around, you probably make fun of his wings and those little diapers he wears. A fanny pack IS hella funny, I'll give you that, especially for a nice restuarant. However your 'comments' about his fanny pack was most likely translated as critisisms,and not jokes, or whatever you were going after. Oh yeah, and continuing to make crack at him through the date....real classy. Fanny packs were tacky to me back in the day when everybody had one, but clowning someone who thought enough of you to want to meet you in person is REALLY tacky. Not only were you shallow in this instance, but a little self absorbed also. Another really attractive trait to have by the way. Hate to say it but, that's why you don't have a man now. But wait... I know why...There aren't enough good men out there. Right? Wrong! That's just what women say when they're so self absorbed that they cant accept responsibility for their own part in EVERY relationship they're in. Every guy is not goin to be a keeper,thats unrealistic. But every guy can't be wrong either. That's just as unrealistic. I'm not saying fanny pack boy was going to be the one for you, but you didn't even give him a chance after you saw him. You probably have met 'Mr. Right' dozens of times, and dismissed him because of some minor detail that your shallowness wouldn't allow you to grow beyond. You said that he took a'beautiful' pic, and that you had awesome rapport over the phone. It seems like you threw the baby out w/ the bath water. Makes me think how many more times you've done the exact same thing. Don't you think men have had to overlook some stuff you did, said, wore, didn't wear... etc. in the past? You are an attractive young lady so I know dudes are always pushing up on you. I know that most of them you have to push away , because some of 'em ain't right. A lady HAS GOT to have standards, and you're entitled to your own. But you seriously might want to consider getting over yourself a little bit hun. Sounds like you're doing too much.
 msflis
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 99
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 3:31:24 PM

You're not abandoned by cupid. It's just that everytime he comes around, you probably make fun of his wings and those little diapers he wears.


Hee hee!

This thread was really quite a surprise to me, seeing how many people thought the act of wearing a fanny pack would be a deal-breaker, although I did see a few others besides me and the Kount voting otherwise. Maybe it comes down to perceived choice--if you think you can do better and don't have to "settle" until every last detail is perfect, you're perfectly willing to brush aside an otherwise suitable man whose fashion style raises your eyebrows.

As one other poster said, the fanny pack is detachable. For my deal-breakers I'd focus more on traits that are ingrained, like lying.

--Ms. Flis
 abandonedbycupid
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 100
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/26/2008 3:49:54 PM
mmhmm (clearing my throat)... Okay. For him the bag was not a removable object because he let me know that he is moved to wear that object all of the time (remember the comment about this being who he is).

In regards to the joking... It wasn't harsh. We were exchanging jokes at each other's expense all night. Much of it racially fueled as I am black and he is Jewish. Swinging from both sides. That was one of the reasons we related to each other so well. We knew they were jokes. When I would joke about 'fanny' he wouldn't laugh because he sees nothing wrong with it. At the end of the night he would have been perfectly happy moving forward with the relationship.

It's not as if he was dressed like a Calvin Klein model + a fanny pack. The fanny pack is only an indication. It is more of a fundamental difference that we both recognized in the end.

And as far as saying there are no good men out here... if you read farther back in the thread, I wrote, 'there are alot of good men out there but not everyone of them is for me.'

I'm not, generally, a rude person but every one has habits. My humor is somewhat Dave Chappellean. That won't change. I do need a man who can handle that.

As far as why I'm single... no comment
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