Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  >      Home login  
 Sky at sunset
Joined: 12/20/2006
Msg: 22
Who is that person in the mirror?Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Lovely story and one I can identify with. My mother is 82 and still believes she is much younger and active. She talks a great walk. Her solution is just not to look in mirrors. On the other hand, she is interesting and interested in life.

My dad, who is also well, had more trouble with aging and I see two of my brother going the same way.
Joined: 10/2/2005
Msg: 24
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 7/29/2008 7:44:25 PM
As soon as I start getting depressed about my age and whatever associated aches and pains I may have, I remind myself that my mother, at nearly 80 years of age, is still working a full-time job and attending church regularly, in spite of ever-increasing health problems. (She recently went back to work the day following her release from the hospital after being treated for a pulmonary embolism). My grandmother (her mom) lived to be 100 years and 4 months old. Im blessed with good genes, I guess. I've been told it was due to the Irish part of my ancestry. :-)
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 25
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 7/31/2008 7:16:15 AM
Aw, don't lose you that light in your eyes
Never too late to love
Never too late to try
When somebody needs you
Give them all you can give
When you live in the love
Your lovin' to live

Stay young keep your wheels in motion
You've got everything that you need
Stay young with your rock an' rollin'
All the best things in life are free

Aw, don't you feel like playin' the fool
Step out of line
Break all the rules
Don't let them tell you
It's not for you
Don't go growin' old
Before you're through

Stay young keep your wheels in motion
You've got everything that you need
Stay young with your rock an' rollin'
All the best things in life are free

Stay young keep your wheels in motion
You've got everything that you need
Stay young with your rock an' rollin'
All the best things in life are free

Stay young keep your wheels in motion
You've got everything that you need
Stay young with your rock an' rollin'
All the best things in life are free

Written By: (B. Gallagher / G. Lyle)
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 26
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 7/31/2008 8:19:54 AM
As we get older and are thrown into the arena of dating again we are scared and delusional., delusional is right...who knew? I never thought in a million years I would dating, ( or trying to get a date) at this stage in my life.

We all still have that younger version of ourself in our brain.

...How true is that? our brains play nasty tricks, they fool us into thinking we can do anything...... I was at the lake for a couple of days and frolicked like a school girl, both in and out of the water...when I got home last night I was totally "played out".

We don't all see the older woman in the mirror.

...Oh I see her....and its my mom staring back at me and yelling, "Act your age" ..and at one time I would have shouted back, " I am acting my age"......It's funny cause I am still trying to figure out how people my age should act.

Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 27
view profile
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 7/31/2008 9:40:45 AM
When I look in the mirror, I see the stress life has put in my eyes. I see a few wrinkles time has placed there. I see the age spots most of us women are blessed with after menapausal years. I don't look at any of this as negative things I see. I look at it positively. It is part of the aging process. I am grateful I can see myself in the mirror.
I also see so much more when I look in the mirror. I see myself. I see dark eyes still full of mischieve and wondering. I see a smile welcoming a stranger to open up to me. I see who I am inside, the woman in me. I see a sensual woman with hope in her eyes. I see a woman with laughter deep in her soul. I see me, exactly where I want to be. I am a woman at peace with myself and my place in life. I see so more more than what the physical reveals.
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 30
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 8/31/2008 7:35:40 AM
First of all, this is such a lovely thread and even tho I am a little young here, I couldn't let this one go by without a comment.

I am very young at heart. I have always been like this. Sometimes I look silly (as I probably do now) but I feel that this keeps me thinking young, and therefore, making me live longer and with full of hopes and dreams of how my life will pan out.

Life is exciting and should be lived to the fullest each and every day. Recently I was on a little bit of a downer in life and with the support and care of those who cared around me, also my mind, I brought myself back up again.

If you think you are old, you are going to be old. If you act old, no matter what age you are, you will be old. Think young, and you will be forever young.

When I look in the mirror, I see a happy, content and confident person. Someone who is worthy and someone who deserves the best in life, what ever that may be. I also see an aging face compared to with what I had in my 20's, but I am also proud of it, along with this, I also see lots of hair dye packets to cover them greys, but I like them because they are a part of me and because it is my face, and one that I have come to admire with everything that I have been through.

Life can dish out all kinds of things at us. Whether it be great times or complete sadness. It is in our mindsets of how we choose to deal with every little thorn or bed of roses we come across.
Joined: 11/13/2011
Msg: 32
view profile
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/9/2012 3:44:15 AM
I loved the mirror poem test
Joined: 12/30/2010
Msg: 33
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/9/2012 7:54:03 AM
Dear OP,
Thank you for sharing such a poignant story. The following is not meant in any way to connect with your mom!! Your story, however, does raise such a huge thing for all of us over 45: the challenge to find our own individual balance between "go[ing] gentle into that good night" and "rag[ing] rag[ing] against the dying of the light" (-- Dylan Thomas).

Those "young or old enough" to have seen "The Thorn Birds" might remember the one and only line that 80 year old Mary Carson delivers to "Father Ralph." "The girl" hidden within her otherwise seemingly nasty, bitter character surfaces -- for one beautiful little moment. Only to go "poof," disappear and morph into an even nastier vindictive old witch. The painful truth is that her money and power and status cannot get her past her own defiant refusal to embrace each and every year of her life as a blessing. The viewer can't help but mourn the loss of such human potential to create joy and love for so many fellow human beings. . . if only she had found the courage and strength to cherish every minute of her existence on earth, dozens of other preoples' lives would have also been blessed. . . such a tragically sad waste of human potential to love and be loved. . .
 Molly Maude
Joined: 9/11/2008
Msg: 34
view profile
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/9/2012 12:15:09 PM
reading this three and a half year old post, I was struck by how few of the posters still had profiles or photos up ...

so I'm wondering what happened to them ... of course, some are still among us ... and you know who you are!

as for the person in MY mirror ... it shocks me every time I see that aging woman ... I feel much as I've felt most my life ... but the vision staring back at me from that mirror MUST be someone else! that can't be ME ... she looks ok for an older woman ... but where am I in that view???

Joined: 4/10/2008
Msg: 35
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/9/2012 1:18:14 PM
this is a great post and some of the things written brought tears to my eyes.

I agree with the poster who said that when we are depressed we look older in the mirror ( and to others)

and when we are happy we look younger in the mirror and to others.

I mean that is what I see when I look in the mirror. I have been through a lot of sadness in my life and when I feel that way I dont even like going out.
Maybe now I will find a nice little coffee shop to sit in...
and meet someone there instead of on here cause then he will be local and not
accross the country. I feel encouraged after reading this. very nice OP
Joined: 1/24/2012
Msg: 36
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/29/2012 9:12:08 PM
I had a dream once where I was in the back of a limo and talking to one of my drivers in the front. I was feeling impatient and asking when we would get where we were going. I was also annoyed at the old man sitting next to me on my left, who remained silent. I walked with the driver a little more and then glanced to my left and realized the old man was me, reflected in the glass of the window. It was my own reflection.

Joined: 5/25/2007
Msg: 37
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/30/2012 3:44:01 AM
what a great post , thanks for sharing, i may look old, but still feel young, one day im sure that will change,
but not today !
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 38
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/30/2012 7:13:49 AM
I broke off a relationship with a man who has been abroad for a year--time and distance were too great.

But a couple of weeks before that, he sent two pictures. I looked at them and though, wow, he has aged a lot in a year. I think it was mainly the retreating hairline and new gray hair.

I went to the mirror to look at myself, wondering if I had aged as much. I couldn't see that I had. I talked to my older sister who said that I "never" changed much.

Maybe her observation is the refusal to look at herself clearly in the mirror but truthfully, I can't see that she has changed much, either.

Joined: 9/20/2011
Msg: 39
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/30/2012 10:18:42 AM
a beautiful story...we are as young as we feel...
Joined: 8/6/2011
Msg: 40
view profile
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/30/2012 11:47:27 AM
Thank you for your wonderful personal story it touched my heart & made me smile.

I met my eldest son for lunch last week (as he is at university)and I was discussing that I may need a little motor bike if I change jobs as it would involve more travelling and I want the car just for family.
He promptly said " Please don't mum. If you fall off because you are older your bones would take longer to heal!" Oh how gobbed smacked and tickled was I for his concern and honest reflection that I must seem so ancient at 45 to his 19 years.

Working with terminally ill patients makes me appreciate every lesson and joy life gives me and aging is part of the journey.
I do forget how others see me sometimes and find it a pleasant surprise if complimented & I have always tried to see the inner person with those around me before looks or age.
Thank you again a golden story ;)
Starfishgazer x
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 41
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/30/2012 2:20:50 PM
I often look in the mirror and catch glimpses of my mother when she was in her 40's/50's. I thought she was old then, but I realize now at this age that youth and love are in the heart not on the face. I have all the tell-tale signs of being my age and have no desire to erase or eradicate a single laugh line lest I miss seeing my mother's dear face.

Your story is very moving, Starfishgazer, and I too, miss my dear parents.
Joined: 8/6/2011
Msg: 42
view profile
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 1/31/2012 2:19:58 AM
Thank you 1388SmartBlonde really kind of you.
And I enjoy your threads really stimulating discussions.
Take care.
Starfishgazer x
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 43
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 2/2/2012 6:58:34 AM
I hope I didn't sound too 'goody two-shoes' ... I look in the mirror and realize one thing I've learnt is that Life (the process) is a continual 'giving up' of things and people. Some we give up willingly, some we renounce, and some are taken from us even tho' we want them to stay. We. Have. No. Say. Another 'Lesson Learnt' is that Life. Is. Random. People spend excessive amounts of time trying to 'understand' or 'comprehend' the 'WHY' about 'WHY did THAT happen to ME?' or 'WHY isn't MY life BETTER?' or 'WHY didn't THAT happen to THEM?' ... the answer's always the same: Because. No mystery. One of Life's lessons for us is that one about 'Acceptance'. Took me a long time to master that chapter.

The chapter I'm still arguing with is the one about Physical Frailty. The Knee That Locks, the Eyes That Blur, the Ear That Hears Not, the Back That Fails ... there's a laundry list of starters. All of 'em will, I know, get progressively less good (note I didn't say 'worse'). As long as I can play the game in public so I don't look like 'prey', it's all good. These, tho', are things I USED to worry about - no longer. I've accepted they happen (maybe in a different order and degree) to everyone sooner or later. Doesn't mean I like it, it just means I've accepted it and no longer fight it. Now I look for 'workarounds'.

There's another chapter, 'Forgetting'. Some things that are in that one have been forgotten so completely I'll never dredge 'em up again in this lifetime; others are shadowy blurs of their former selves, and others still haven't begun to fade. Over time, tho', all will. Following this chapter is one known as 'Things I Wish I Hadn't Done', and that's pretty damned full by now.

My favorite chapter is the one called 'Bright Shinies', which is where I keep my 'Magpie Moments' ... these are all the things that make up the bright highlights and best memories of events I've been lucky enough to have happen to me or to be part of while I'm here. This chapter is where all the 'Things I'll Never Forget' are stored ...

Put the chapters together in any order and, if I pay attention when reading the book, the 'Pattern That Connects' the events in My Life Since Birth, whether good, bad, or neutral, are displayed in high relief. It's up to me to be able to read this book and learn from it ... my footsteps along the trail become easy to see in hindsight - interpreting the meaning of the things that happened on the path is always the harder of the lessons to be learnt ...

Everything listed here, and more, is what looks back at me from the mirror ... and it's a good feeling.
Joined: 11/6/2011
Msg: 44
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 2/2/2012 8:07:37 AM
Thank you for posting this. It does shed some reflection on how we view ourselves!
Joined: 7/17/2011
Msg: 45
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 2/2/2012 3:29:08 PM
Sometimes I look in the mirror and wonder who that person is? Where did she come from, where is she going and how on earth did I get where I am now. That I am eternally grateful every single time someone thinks my 16 year old granddaughter is my child. That I make a new best friend when people are shocked when I say I am 55 and they say I thought you were in your early 40's. Then I think how silly I am... I don't want to ever be old and crotchety. I don't want to be grouchy and not want to listen to loud music anymore. I want to always drive fast, be silly and act like a kid. I mentioned in another post that I still refer to myself as a girl... But those days when I look in the mirror and see a new wrinkle or less shine in my skin, that my joints ache and I realize that as much as I try to fight it, father time will eventually win, well those days just s*ck. I try to live by the motto" I may get older but I will never BE old. " It's a mindset, maybe an illusion. But you have to work with what you have, you have to still love you no matter what, you have to be the best "you" that you can be. I'm with Peter Pan..I'm never growing up!!
Joined: 1/15/2011
Msg: 46
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 2/2/2012 7:30:47 PM
What a sad but nice story. I'm glad she's once again with her true love.
Joined: 12/31/2009
Msg: 47
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 2/2/2012 11:36:41 PM
Sounds like true love..they had a beautiful gift they shared with each other..thanks for sharing..
Joined: 9/4/2011
Msg: 48
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 2/3/2012 9:30:05 AM
I never ask were the years went..Because i know i was there.. I hate the young and old thing...Alot of people have trouble with age...Why.. you can't stop it just take care of yourself & be good to yourself...And when you look in the mirror smile!
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 49
Who is that person in the mirror?
Posted: 2/9/2012 8:03:55 AM
I look better at 50ish than I did in my 30s. I color my hair to cover the grays. I have been going on dates with younger men and it feels good.

Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  >