|humanist funeralsPage 2 of 2 (1, 2)|
|This is how we sent my father off. He'd been brought up a pretty strict Anglican, but a World War, liberating a concentration camp, and then getting involved in trying to stop epic religious unpleasantness in India and Palestine, dissuaded him of the existence of God. So, it's what he requested.|
Actually what he said was "I'll be dead, who cares, you might as well put me in a wheely bin and set fire to it, maybe push it down the High Street, I've always wanted a Viking funereal. No bloody god-botherers is what I insist on."
We had a lovely service at Putney Vale, and the Pipe-Major from the Irish Guards came to play him into the oven. His brothers, who all had the same strict religious upbringing loved it, and to the dismay of one wife in particular, all want it done, with the attitude that all the money saved can be spent on booze , song and general happy revelry .
Posted: 8/5/2013 4:01:25 AM
|I always fancied being mummified and entombed in a pyramid built in my honour, Mum says I must think a lot of myself haha!|
Due to cost though I suspect this is unlikely to be a viable option and a humanist funeral with vast amounts of alcohol sounds good to me seeing as we are not a religious family.
Posted: 8/5/2013 8:09:10 AM
|^^^You realise they pull your brains out through your nose as part of that process right? you're dead, but still.......|
^^^will you be buried in the pyramid with your mooncup? :)
I'm planning on being burned in the garden in a cardboard box and ashes scattered in the quarry where I used to play as a kid. No one is to party, I'm dead for goodness sake!!! They must miss me and cry for me till THIER dying days!!
Posted: 8/5/2013 12:12:06 PM
|Proof that relationships are bad for english.|
Posted: 8/5/2013 12:23:57 PM
|^^^aha not true...vodka is bad for english|
great contribution :)
Posted: 8/5/2013 1:19:25 PM
|I 've always fancied being buried under a Weeping Willow tree as long as bloody mutt doesn't come along and regularly**** his leg up or I'll come back and haunt the little beggar!|
I 've requested the clan have a tipple of whisky to see me off , been a whisky drinking woman (in moderation) for 30 odd years and it ain't done me any harm yet
The whinging I've had......can we have it with lemonade , coke etc etc. I've told them all they have to drink it neat ha ha!!
Posted: 8/6/2013 1:02:12 AM
|I have a friend whose daughter makes willow coffins, after a slow start it seems to be coming right for her. |
I'd be quite happy to be sent off in recycled cardboard, after all, I (hopefully) would be past the point of caring.
I think the nub of the thing for me is that cremation is a must - there's no point in being eco-friendly on one hand and then continuing to clutter up our limited subsoil with decaying flesh.
Posted: 8/6/2013 8:50:45 AM
'I 've always fancied being buried under a Weeping Willow tree'
Ahhh, my Dad's under a Holly Tree and mum who is 90 on the 25th wastes no time telling everyone he's 'up the London Road under a tree'
Cheers (MMMMM whiskey)
Posted: 8/6/2013 1:31:58 PM
^^^will you be buried in the pyramid with your mooncup? :)
lol well I'm kinda hoping that by the time I die I would have ceased to have needed my mooncup for some time!!
I think I'll be cremated anyway, I don't fancy mouldering away in a grave somewhere (hence wanting mummification).
Posted: 8/7/2013 10:20:01 AM
|I always had the idea that I might like to give my leftovers to medical science. I'm not sure how much of my old bod my kin would get back to bury, but the idea of the humanist funeral sounds lovely.|
Posted: 8/7/2013 1:22:03 PM
|My girls and family and friends only need to remember me,which is not hard. So I would like it to be as simple as possible.|
Posted: 8/8/2013 7:36:58 AM
|Funerals are for the living, not the dead, so whatever my son feels like doing with my cadaver when I'm dead is entirely up to him; I won't be around to care. |
I've written a will and a 'plan', and in it it states that as long as I'm cremated, he can arrange whatever service he wants. It also states that he gets sole custody of my ashes to do with whatever he sees fit; he can chuck them in the bin lorry when it passes if he likes.
Posted: 8/11/2013 3:02:44 AM
|I went to a Humanist funeral a few weeks ago, my friend who had died at age 62 had left strict instructions on what was to happen and as befitted the man, much of the service was light hearted - his coffin went to the committal to Elvis Preseley singing 'Return to sender' and leaving the chapel to 'Always look on the bright side.' These are all much funnier in the written word than in reality.|
My feelings appear to be at odds with the rest of the forum, but I left that funeral feeling I had lost a great person with no hope of ever seeing them again. Being born into Church of England I have like most people lost adherence to its tenants but the basics remain. It may be viewed as pathetic by people who do not have basic faith but I will cling to the belief that we do have an after life in some shape or form. I therefore like some religious element to a funeral, not too much, just so that I can continue to believe that I might just meet that person again in some ethereal way. It makes me feel better even if it has no scientific basis whatsoever.
Posted: 8/11/2013 5:03:56 AM
Being born into Church of England I have like most people lost adherence to its tenants but the basics remain. It may be viewed as pathetic by people who do not have basic faith but I will cling to the belief that we do have an after life in some shape or form.
According to the bible, if you have "lost adherence to its tenants", then your "afterlife" will involve "burning in hell" and being constantly tortured.
So probably best to lose that bit as well...?
OT My best friend died in September last year.
I know I'll never see him again.
But he'd only been back from Gambia for about a year, because he fell ill, and came back for the treatment (Hep. C., contracted via a tattoo which he got many years ago in India.)
There's a very strong possibility that, had he not become ill, I never would have seen him again anyway.
So I don't think of him as dead, I think of him lying on a beach, with a big bag of herb.
I know this isn't true, and is just a fiction, but it's what he would have wanted.
Posted: 8/11/2013 3:27:13 PM
|We had a humanist funeral for my big sis five years ago, none of us are religious so it just wouldn't have fitted..|
Many years ago my sister had an 'incident' with a neighbour..later that day sis returned home to the RAF camp where she was based...
Someone linked the Sparks' song 'This town ain't big enough...' with what happened that day and my sister 'leaving town',it became forever her theme tune. (It was a big hit at the time)
When she passed, my other siblings and me decided to be cheeky and have it played at her funeral. Long story short, we bottled it..changed it at the last minute...Five years later I wish we had stuck to our original plan, but that's cos the pain has diminished..her funeral left me a broken wreck, partly because her pall bearers were my 2 brothers, 3 nephews, and my 16 year old son.
I simply do not accept that I have seen or heard the last of her, same as I 'know' that when I go, that is not the end for me and my kids.
Posted: 8/11/2013 3:40:06 PM
|I don't believe in an afterlife but I talk to my departed Mum everyday, usually to ask her for a bit of help here and there. Dad was a keen gardener and was very proud of his Army life, as I am, so I buy a remembrance cross for him every year and have it in a nice place in the garden. Have a chat to him every time when I'm doing something in the garden and ask him what he thinks.|
But I don't believe in any of it.
Posted: 8/11/2013 10:03:52 PM
|I talk to my Dad three years after he passed away. He was a quiet lovely man which makes me|
miss him even more. I often wish I could have one more talk with him. I'm grateful he's at
rest now. He had a full and long life. After witnessing three of his brothers die horrific cancer
deaths, I think he came to the conclusion there was no afterlife. I'm resolutely agnostic.
Posted: 9/5/2013 1:07:57 PM
|I have been to a couple of humanist funerals and that is the way for me|
There was the perfect mix of respect and humour......that's for me!
Posted: 9/5/2013 2:05:58 PM
|my aunt died on Saturday, I was informed on Monday afternoon by my cousins wife. After asking when the funeral was I said I knew the venue but could not remember what it was called. My aunt had told me, and them time and time again she wanted to be buried at one of those natural burial grounds where you get buried and a tree is planted in your memory.|
The awkward silence followed by telling me it was at a crematorium 18 miles away for some unknown reason, told me her son is not going to carry out her wishes.
As I know she wanted no religion there either, it will be interesting to see what does happen.
Saying all of this makes me want to remind people that if you want to get what you want, then arrange it and pay for it before you go...
Others may have different ideas, whilst your still warm.....
Posted: 9/5/2013 2:24:26 PM
|Oh gawd - she'll get the standard litany, the 23rd psalm & all the rest....why, oh why can't people get it there in that we don't all want the C of E common prayer book and a 'respectable' send off? - Good luck mate, I hope it goes off ok..|
Posted: 9/15/2013 8:15:10 AM
|The funeral was last wednesday and it was the strangest one I have ever been to. We followed the coffin into the crem whilst a recording of Pavorotti was played. We sat listened to two more and were ushered out during a fourth. Noone said a word. Apart from the opera no other noise. It felt very empty and bizarre. I thought two things. 1. I bet Myra Hindley had something said at her late night funeral and 2. When Pav was blasting out Nesson Dorma, someone in is room will. . .|