Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 thatswhatshesaid
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 68
How bad is it to show up at the door unannounced?Page 5 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I live in an old brownstone with 4 other people. I call them or email before I stop by and I'm their neighbor. I don't think being in the area is a good rationale for "stopping by."

Especially if you don't know the guy that well, it's just not right. People come home from work, they want to wear sweatpants, be smelly after the gym, eat onions and sharp cheddar cheese, watch the classic animated bambi movie and cry... No one wants a new date to catch them in such a state.
 Dumpling-Girl
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 71
view profile
History
How bad is it to show up at the door unannounced?
Posted: 8/5/2008 10:36:42 PM
He was already not interested when you were texting to hang out, and then it never happened, so for you to drop in after that feels stalkerish. Especially if you were used to texting on the phone, you could have given him a few minutes notice. If he was ga-ga over you, obviously, none of this would matter, and he'd be delighted to see you, but you should have gotten a hint from the "day in question" that he wasn't ga-ga (yet).

I am sort of a private person at home. I wouldn't even expect my close friends to just drop in on me (maybe I'm in my pajamas, or the place is a mess or I'm in the middle of something - especially after only 3 dates - I could be on a date with someone else even!). I would feel very invaded if a guy dropped in on me after only 3 dates. Bleah. Even if he was a good dating prospect. I'd have to be ga-ga (and be okay with him being ga-ga for me) for it to not freak me out.
 STH III
Joined: 6/5/2008
Msg: 72
view profile
History
How bad is it to show up at the door unannounced?
Posted: 8/10/2008 6:47:51 PM
You can stop by and see me anytime babe, you are a cutie.
 openlove
Joined: 5/26/2008
Msg: 74
How bad is it to show up at the door unannounced?
Posted: 8/24/2008 4:41:14 PM
Thats a no-no for me. I never liked for anyone to show up unannounced. Main reason- my daughter. I dont need her to think things and/or see that stuff. Second is because I like my privacy....so yeah, its a bit rude.
 bbauman
Joined: 8/19/2008
Msg: 76
view profile
History
How bad is it to show up at the door unannounced?
Posted: 8/24/2008 8:25:15 PM
id at least send a text message before hand, showing up invited... eh, i like the supirse but if i committed myself to something else it could bt a put of havcing to drop my prior obligations to accomodate you. Dont get me wrong, in a committed relationship i think its wonderful, but if you are just starting out with the guy, you might want to message ahead
 PickyProfessional
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 77
How bad is it to show up at the door unannounced?
Posted: 8/24/2008 8:27:36 PM
It's fine if you know the person well. If not, then it's a tad presumptuous.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 78
view profile
History
How bad is it to show up at the door unannounced?
Posted: 8/24/2008 8:33:42 PM
i like to get a call before hand, but if your in the neighborhood and you stop by because you want to check up on him/her especially after they eluded to an encounter the day prior but it never happened, then i say you are perfectly in the clear.

however his reaction really isnt. I'm going to side with what the 2nd reply said (i think its the 2nd). he is hiding something, he made plans to come see you, then something came up, then the next time you saw him it wasnt on the call ahead of times terms so he was afraid whatever he is hiding would be discovered.

that usually points to cheating. but i cannot make these assumptions for you, always give a person the benefit of the doubt untill you know the truth.
 pokerjimmy
Joined: 11/10/2006
Msg: 80
view profile
History
How bad is it to show up at the door unannounced?
Posted: 8/25/2008 10:26:59 AM
I agree with snarky...the only people you can just drop in on are your mom and dad, sis or bro if you're really close or very best friends.

Bad form
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  >