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 Sunshine-99
Joined: 7/14/2006
Msg: 225
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?Page 4 of 17    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17)
I think "being divorsed" doesn't automatically mean "damaged goods" but it may symbolize a red flag to proceed with caution. Some people are definitely victimized by a spouse developing some malicious behavior changes - such as cheating, lying, attachment issues, etc.

I fully understand that marrage could be a tough gig and some people aren't just meant to be together. I am more interested in how a person rebounds psychologically from a breakup - Are they letting "it" hold them back or have they already grieved it, learned from it and dating in a more cautious, selective manner???
 cloudthree
Joined: 12/31/2007
Msg: 228
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/10/2008 9:55:13 AM
Not at all....Life is an ongoing learning process, and certainly not like a "Hollywood" movie love story. Riding off into the sunset although nice and maybe desired is not reality. We learn by our errors hopefully.

"Failure is success" if we learn by it. Damaged Goods??? No I do not think so.
 mcopado
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 237
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/10/2008 1:14:00 PM
Thanks, glad I could help.
 GoneSailinBabe
Joined: 7/6/2008
Msg: 240
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/11/2008 5:32:36 AM
You are a troll.
 mcfly762
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 241
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/11/2008 10:26:42 PM
"Ive replied to one of your posts before. Im starting to think you're a d!ck. Young people who have been divoced are not damaged goods. They just married before they knew who they were and when they grew up, they realized they were bad for each other. You cant say all divorced people are damaged goods. If anything the majority of them are more ready to be in a relationship because they know what is that they want and dont want. "

Aren't you supposed to have all that stuff figured out before you get married?
There are MANY people that are currently in their 70s and 80s that were married BEFORE they were 20 and had happy marriages for 50-60 years. They were from the WW2 generation didn't have the "grass is greener on the other side" mindset that so many people have these days. There wasn't all this b*llshit about "finding out who you are" and jumping from partner to partner, hoping to find the "perfect one". They graduated from school, married their high school sweetheart, went to work, and had pretty happy lives.

"And as far as a woman with a kid being ruined in your eyes. Thats great cause who needs a d!ck like you raising their kids. This coming from a single parent of one. And the "minority" isnt the men who would raise another mans child, because couples adopt, men remarry, and women get sperm doners, the "minority" of men are men like you who are not men at all. Because weather or not the child is yours children need love, and affection. And if you are too stupid to know that, then who needs you anyway."

Every single point you make, including this one, could be made in a more friendly and respectful fashion without compromising your opinion.
 mcfly762
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 242
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/11/2008 10:28:32 PM
Aren't you all just being a bit harsh on the OP?

Name calling aside, he did bring up some good points. If there wasn't any truth in what he was saying, I doubt there would be so many mean-spirited replies.

I think you can figure out how to suggest that the author be a little bit open minded , while maintaining the level of politeness and respect that we have for one another here. The above curt statements aren't it.
 SweetnSassyNatureLover
Joined: 4/11/2008
Msg: 243
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/11/2008 11:53:43 PM

Aren't you all just being a bit harsh on the OP?

Name calling aside, he did bring up some good points. If there wasn't any truth in what he was saying, I doubt there would be so many mean-spirited replies.

I think you can figure out how to suggest that the author be a little bit open minded , while maintaining the level of politeness and respect that we have for one another here. The above curt statements aren't it.


Try reading the entire thread before making such comments!! Gapeman has brought whatever harshness comes onto himself.

 jackster121
Joined: 9/2/2008
Msg: 246
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/12/2008 1:07:37 PM
I don't know how old you are, but when the years get added on, it is rare that you find single never married. And anyway, a single person who was involved for a # of years, i.e. LTR, will almost have the same bond. Once the years go by, there are memories, experiences, good times and bad. So you need to find a single never dated woman. Good luck with that
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 247
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/12/2008 1:07:48 PM
Genetics and attitude, along with persistence will help all age better, and that has nothing to do with gender, and much more to do with self image.....

OT.........I believe that all people are damaged to some extent as they age and mature, and divorce is just one of many things that will contribute to that damage.

How you handle all those life dealing experiences is what really matters, and damage can be fixed or healed as long as one has the mental ability to do so......

Just my opinion.......
 mcfly762
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 250
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/12/2008 1:50:21 PM
"I do agree with the others that you can be in a number of relationships and still be considered "damaged" goods. I do not think there is a difference between the ending of a marriage and the ending of a relationship. It is simply a breakup."

So marriage means nothing to you, eh?
 mcfly762
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 251
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/12/2008 1:51:34 PM
"Difference of opinions make it interesting
But you have lost something ! To think like that!"

Aren't you being a little hypocritical with those two statements? You're contradicting yourself....
 mcfly762
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 252
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/12/2008 1:58:37 PM
"If anybody is clearly damaged goods it OP and other judgemental saddos."
_________

Bullsh*t. Your past behavior is a DAMN GOOD CLUE as to your current and future behavior. Your actions are testament to your character. Some people don't want to be judged because it's the equivalent of someone holding up a mirror and making them face the ugly truth of their moral bankruptcy.....and it makes them feeeeeeeyuuul bad.
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 256
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/13/2008 10:39:38 AM
[****I've only dated and had sex with strippers, escorts, and amateur pornstars for the past decade, because I haven't had time to meet people. My work is my life ****]

Gapeman, you don't DATE a hooker or an Escort, they are the last resort for a man that has trouble meeting normal women. Don't blame your high powered career Look at Hollywood moguls, Wall street types and any successful business men, they date, get married, and eventually have families. But you don't. Why not?
Because, you never get rejected by a hooker she'll always find you fascinating and she doesn't mind being asked to leave your place after you screw her. Plus you never have to get to know them or connect with them on any level. In fact you don't need to talk to them at all. They WORK for you.
A divorced woman is damaged goods but a man that has never had a girlfriend since becoming an adult (you did say you'd been doing this for ten years and you're 29) likes to frequent strip clubs and 'dates' hookers is Normal???? Alrighty then.
Gapeman have you ever had a real date?
 DDay555
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 259
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/13/2008 10:56:55 AM
Meh.. I'm divorced.... Twice... Damaged goods? Nope.

Let's see what I learned by that:
I'm smarter, more aware that I make mistakes as does whom ever I associate does, making me more forgiving. I'm more tolerant in general. I cook, clean do laundry...

Oh yeah... I'm housebroken real good now too...
 mcfly762
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 260
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/13/2008 4:05:45 PM
"When your looking for a signifincan other, no matter long term or short term, its about growing as a person and learning from your mistakes. I guess when you make harsh judgements like that you cut yourself off from knowing some really great people. Keep an open mind---divorce is an unfortunate situation--- It is easy to judge based on your own personal morals and virtues, but you cannot push your morals on others. "


Blah, blah, blah....I get tired of hearing about "growing as a person and learning from your mistakes". All that is an excuse to cover up irresponsible behavior. Whatever happened to learning from others' mistakes?
 mystic star
Joined: 2/28/2008
Msg: 262
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/13/2008 8:21:28 PM
Absolutely not!!! "I feel like once somebody has shared so much with another person that they can never erase that"-Why would you expect anyone to do that??? That was a significant chapter in their lives!!! As for the "A young women with a kid is completely ruined"-Where the hell do you think the kid came from? Aliens? No! They came from THE FATHER that's now a single man!!!!
 mcfly762
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 263
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/13/2008 9:54:32 PM
"Divorced women as damaged goods? Absolutely not.... considering they got divorced probably for reasons being the man they was married to and was a jerk to them and probably are more wanting of a person that wants to be with them and not treat them like a piece of furniture instead of a wife. Plus, I have known some divorced people that gaive lots of advice what not to do in a marriage so it better prepares me for it one day :O "

That's what happens when she dates badboys and thugs when she's younger....
which leaves her in a never ending cycle of drama and pain and bullshit...like a fly that keeps flying into a hot lightbulb, zapping itself over and over but it can't seem to stop. That's women today, forever embroiled in a cycle of jumping from man to man, relationship to relationship, looking for that perfect masculine man that doesn't exist. This leaves broken, used, abused and frustrated women, and wussy boy men.
 try1more
Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 267
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/19/2008 10:44:47 PM
why?
well gapeman you wouldn't have a very high opinion of me then, as i raised two. one of which got the 7 years plus of further education he wanted. i also raised two of my own.
i always suspected i was a bit odd
now i'm damaged goods as well
 socialgirl3
Joined: 8/19/2008
Msg: 268
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/19/2008 10:56:57 PM
You are quite the catch! I'm sure your inbox will be FULL of messages from undamaged robots with low standards. Keep in mind that there are things in life that are beyond our control and having nothing to do with judgment or choice. Divorce is sometimes the end result of such life experiences. And if all you're looking for is to get laid, go to your local bar and leave us alone on POF...
 mcfly762
Joined: 7/7/2008
Msg: 271
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/20/2008 4:34:36 PM
" grow apart, abusive relationship etc. Do not be narrow minded you will cut yourself off from the world. It is okay to establish standards and some divorced people will fit them and some won't. Just don't dash through life with blinders on. "

What a bunch of degenerates.

People weren't like this 50-100 years ago. Irresponsible, moronic behavior simply wasn't accepted.
 mibra
Joined: 8/30/2008
Msg: 273
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 9/20/2008 4:47:26 PM
Do you think that I am like the damaged goods?



Don't let a divorce or someone destroy your life. You deserve better so you got divorced. This is the way I think lol. Don't you think so?
 phishkev
Joined: 9/19/2008
Msg: 277
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 10/1/2008 2:44:38 PM
Not me-everyone is unique and have their own story-far be it from me to throw the gauntlet down on them-maybe you'll miss the person of your dreams!!
 screenangel
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 278
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 10/1/2008 2:52:05 PM
Three times and you're OUT! LOL!
 sbnt
Joined: 1/23/2008
Msg: 279
Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 10/1/2008 3:02:57 PM
I've never been married, but I see MYSELF as damaged goods

Whether someone has been divorced does not make them damaged. In fact, my ex from last year would be undamaged goods in your eyes, but she had so many issues.
 DDay555
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 280
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Do you see divorced people as damaged goods?
Posted: 10/4/2008 1:13:50 PM
I'm not damaged, I'm "Seasoned"...
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