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 CountryBrat
Joined: 7/14/2005
Msg: 107
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Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.Page 2 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
dieveggies

best "belly laugh" i've had in quite some time ... LOL

now i don't feel so bad NOT getting those "2nd dates" becuz i "insisted" on paying my own way... and sometimes his if i had an exhilerating time !!

i do feel tho that if the man has requested my company that he should politely clarify if he intends to pay or not before the date because if i do accept his invitation, i have no problem "going dutch" !!
 smilingrock
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 110
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/25/2012 4:33:05 PM
First post is precious
 lacalli
Joined: 1/12/2012
Msg: 111
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/25/2012 4:54:16 PM
I think it's funny that men keep asking me what I'm doing for money since my injury and suggesting career moves. I'm fine thanks. Always have been, always will be. Never asked a man to pay for anything. In fact I paid for Fatboy's venti frap and breakfast sandwich. Paid for the last 3 guys I dated. Supported two husbands.
On the other hand I'm done dating. Finished. I feel just like the OP so I certainly get his rant only unlike him I don't want to get laid so I don't even go out and bore people with my company like he does.
Gotta love these resurrected threads!
 smilingrock
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 112
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/25/2012 5:05:22 PM
I used to live near NYC and some women lived off dinner dates. No shopping, cooking just let the poor slob pick up the tab...
 ChadsFormerStandIn
Joined: 1/8/2012
Msg: 114
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/25/2012 9:42:40 PM
I'm pretty sure the intent of this thread is to say "hey, look out for this username, cuz I gots MONEY!!!!!!!"

Boo-hoo-hoo

 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 115
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/25/2012 11:35:32 PM

Robyn106:
Whatever happened to chivalry?


Well your Sisters said they want to be equal to men. Maybe they screwed it up for you. If you want to have everything men have, then you can have the bill too.
 smilingrock
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 117
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 4:30:46 AM
Following is a first date criteria some lady has for a first date. These requirements made me bring the old thread back. Kinda steep for a first meet dont you think?



to impress me on a first date flowers are a MUST. I love flowers, and that would set the tone for the evening. I think the first date would be more to get to know someone, so a nice dinner in a quiet restaurant where we can talk and connect would be nice, and if things go well, then a movie with a drink afterwards before heading home. A text or phone call to make sure I got home safe would be the perfect ending to a nice evening.
 PittsburghVixen
Joined: 6/27/2009
Msg: 118
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 7:02:14 AM
PoF Peeps: may I point out a couple of things?

1) This thread started in 2005.
2) The OP stated up front that this was not HIS experience, but that he wanted to share it.
3) The OP is either no longer here, or at least is not using that profile.

That all being said: whomever it was that "spent $14000 on Dates" back in 2004, and was crowing about tricking this girl out of dinner, was wrong to blame his dates for his inability to clearly communicate with them, upfront, that he did not wish to pay for the date.

Men, it's pretty simple: you talk about who pays for what right up front, and then both of you decide if you want to proceed with the date. Don't pull that passive-aggressive BS by pulling out your wallet to act like the Big Man, and then b!tching later about the cost - especially if you didn't get any nookie to offset your "investment".

Women - if you don't want the guy to "expect" a payback, then pay your own way, or at least buy him a drink, leave the tip, pay the parking valet...you get the idea.

If you're going somewhere that you can't afford, just SAY SO. That applies to both genders. Otherwsie, you'd best be prepared to shell out the bucks for not having the gumption to speak up.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 120
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 7:35:31 AM
Some men should stipulate that they will pay if they like the woman, but then women could say they would pay for their dinner, etc or both meals if they like the man. It seems to work out better if both pay for their own dinner. A walk in the park or other free venue sounds great to me. Part of the problem might be that some men and women equate money with how much they like someone.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 121
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 7:54:19 AM
Men, it's pretty simple: you talk about who pays for what right up front, and then both of you decide if you want to proceed with the date. Don't pull that passive-aggressive BS by pulling out your wallet to act like the Big Man, and then b!tching later about the cost - especially if you didn't get any nookie to offset your "investment".


If only it were that simple. Merely bringing the subject up is a minefield.

I go into each and every date planning to pick up the tab. I don't ask the woman to contribute. However, I observe her behavior when the check comes. It's really not that hard to spot the freeloaders.

I also don't do expensive meals and entertainment with someone new. If the only way I can spend time with a woman is to wine and dine her, that relationship wasn't headed anywhere anyhow. There has to be some connection that doesn't involve me (or her) spending money.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 122
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 8:01:31 AM
Why dont you meet them somewhere the first time that is free? That might weed out the freeloaders. I don't get why men gripe about spending so much money when they have/had a choice in who they date. Why is it so hard to own your actions?
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 123
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 8:09:34 AM
Why dont you meet them somewhere the first time that is free? That might weed out the freeloaders. I don't get why men gripe about spending so much money when they have/had a choice in who they date. Why is it so hard to own your actions?


Same reason that women gripe about men being cheap and a myriad of other shortcomings. This is an internet forum devoted to discussing subjects such as this, get used to it.

Women don't come with labels that tell men what to expect, just like men don't come with labels telling women what to expect.

As for weeding out freeloaders, the only way to do it is to see it in action.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 124
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 8:22:09 AM
I never get used to the condescending attitudes of posters who turn questions about men around to talking about what women do in forums.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 125
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 8:24:07 AM
I never get used to the condescending attitudes of posters


I never get used to people who gripe about people griping. One of the purposes of internet forums is to air our gripes and to learn something from the gripes that others air.
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 126
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 8:42:41 AM
Why dont you meet them somewhere the first time that is free? That might weed out the freeloaders. I don't get why men gripe about spending so much money when they have/had a choice in who they date. Why is it so hard to own your actions?


I agree---although I have never once had a man express an interest in meeting me who suggested we meet over a walk in the park. It has always been over an adult beverage in the evenings---never coffee. I always got there first, and paid for my own glass of wine.

My hobbies and interests listed in my profile obviously cost money. Owning and flying a small plane is expensive. Travel is expensive. If a man couldn't afford my lifestyle, my profile should have been an automatic deterrent to contacting me. That is, if he actually bothered to read it.
 Mr_Nonchalance
Joined: 6/21/2011
Msg: 127
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History
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 11:07:37 AM
men need to drop that be a gentlemen role and paying for everyting.this was only done in the past because women were not allowed to work and were dependent of men for mostly everything.

its 2012 women are now going after the same jobs as men,also most colleges always have women who out number the men.you check these pof profiles there are a decent amount of women with great jobs who have a degrees.hell we almost had a women president

the days of entitlements are over,women been fighting for equal rights for years so treat them like a equal and spit the check.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 128
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 11:13:42 AM
When I did my taxes this year I found out that I spent over $14,000 on Dates*


Yup, it's decided, I have no life.

you won't understand the meaning of 'priceless' until you see one of*
these girls handed their own check for 3 20$ martinis and overpriced food*
(that they would probably never buy on their own).


I actually believe that.

In fact; it's way too easy TO believe.

Hilarious story; but I dont exactly hope it's all true

<--It's domestic.

I am a very proud person


Perhaps you mean a fool.

There is a huge difference between: pride, foolish pride, and flat out vanity.


I don't consider gold diggers real women by any means


I agree; those are always the 'lady's.

Call em S's call em W's or call them your boss.

A true 'woman' would never be caught dead flat out parasiting/golddigging.


Whatever happened to chivalry?


It still exists; but its reserved more for those who still believe in being a lady at all times, and in every way. ;) (Thats few and far between these days) Chivalry assumed women neded that extra bit of respect; due to their chosen and forced places in society. In this modern society; ladies compete with men. To give your competition added advantage,.....is just plain stupid.
 SC67
Joined: 6/21/2009
Msg: 129
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 11:44:53 AM
A true 'woman' would never be caught dead flat out parasiting/golddigging.

So what the F is a "true woman" supposed to do when a man says he'd like to take her on a date? Fist fight him for the check?

I'm not sure it's an improvement since I see no difference in my dating success rate, but I am becoming much more vocal when it comes to demanding separate checks & will do it 100% of the time when I have no intention of seeing the man again. That way I don't have to fret about the pained expression on his face when I order the mini bottle of peach moscato (2 glasses!) & pad thai instead of a draft beer & 1/2 price appetizer. Yes, that was my date Friday night. Fortunately he redeemed himself by spending an hour yakking non-stop about his undying love for some woman he dated for 3 months a couple of months ago. Fascinating stuff...thankfully my dinner was delicious & while I should've charged him for therapy I felt better knowing I was paying for my own & would never have to lay eyes on him again.

Pfft...I'm done dating. Topics like this drive me f'ng crazy. If you can't afford to pay or don't want to pay then tell the woman it's gonna be dutch & pick something you can afford. If you want to change the way things have always been done you have to be willing to put in the sacrifice & work. Talk to your boys & tell them to stop buying women dinner on dates & drinks in bars. When the dinner & drinks dry up the women will either date you or not based solely on your personality (or lack thereof).

(and yes...it is not your imagination. I am grouchy today. I stayed up too late last night celebrating a friend's divorce.)
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 130
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 12:01:57 PM
So what the F is a "true woman" supposed to do when a man says he'd like to take her on a date? Fist fight him for the check?


Make a real offer to pay; and do not hate him, or see him as low end, or choose to never date him again.......because he accepts.

Either that or blow im in the parking lot.

If he insists; he insists.

Charm school girls are terrific at psychologically making him insist.


Pfft...I'm done dating. Topics like this drive me f'ng crazy. If you can't afford to pay or don't want to pay then tell the woman it's gonna be dutch & pick something you can afford


:)

You're gorgeous.


I stayed up too late last night celebrating a friend's divorce


Ooo joy; a failure party. (no wonder yer teeth are out)
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 131
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 12:06:22 PM
IT WAS A JOKE

A bj isn't worth the price of any dinner worth eating.


 SC67
Joined: 6/21/2009
Msg: 132
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 1:35:46 PM

You're gorgeous.

Thanks...that's awfully nice of you.


Ooo joy; a failure party. (no wonder yer teeth are out)

wait...my teeth...what?

I don't follow, but I will bring this back around to the topic at hand. She accepted drinks from variety of guys she had no intention of talking to last night. Then she ignored them & ended up making out w/ a guy who didn't even buy her a Coke. So...it's not always about the $ being spent.
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 133
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 4:19:08 PM
I have done a few meet ups over coffee. They work just fine for me and I am sure they weed out the freeloaders. Some do "cancel" right near the meeting itself and when I ask 'em the next day suddently they are too busy. I know if I mentioned something more expensive to them they'd suddenly want in.. like free drinks(I avoid alcohol when meeting new people), or a free dinner.


I'm not a coffee drinker, and the only time I was free to meet someone was in the evening after work. I always met my dates in a bar. I paid for my own drinks, while limiting myself to two drinks max, so that I could observe my dates carefully.

It was amazing some of the things that would come out of men's mouths after they'd had a few drinks. Alcohol, or the lack thereof, was a great way for me to weed out alcoholics, recovering alcoholics, or other men that weren't a good match for me.
 Darkbutcomely
Joined: 4/20/2011
Msg: 135
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 6:20:29 PM
I have had guy suggest we meet up. I suggest coffee. Cheap fast and easy, I think. BUT no they suggest we meet for drinks. They will decided NOT to meet me if it isnt for drinks. AND another thing what kind of women are so desperate for a free meal she will go out with anyone??? I suggest YOU stop dating the homeless.

And my daddy always picked up the check. He took excellent care of my mother. I think he would dig his way out his grave and show up at the table if I were fighting to pay for a man's meal.

The way the rule works:
YOU ask YOU pay. IF you dont want to pay DONT ASK. Just that simple.
 1best_woman
Joined: 2/20/2012
Msg: 137
Mens Dating Expenses/Dating Experiences.
Posted: 2/26/2012 6:39:21 PM
YOU ask YOU pay. IF you dont want to pay DONT ASK. Just that simple.


I disagree. If a man insists on paying, I would let him. But I don't expect him to pay because he asked or "traditional" gender roles.


Whay ever happened to the planner of the date paying?


Usually for the first few dates I have with a man, both of us would plan the details of the date.
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