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 geeleebee
Joined: 5/26/2008
Msg: 3
**Poof** They're GonePage 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
'Poofing' is definitely a part of the online experience. Happens to both sides of the aisle.
 Tx_Style
Joined: 8/4/2008
Msg: 4
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/15/2008 12:15:54 AM
It just happenned to me,only we met soon after our first e-mail,had chemistry.Yes we even talked for hours at a time on the phone after first meeting,but she had a bad taste in mouth froma bad relationship or two and so did I.But we took it slow spent several sat nights together,being patient no sex involved but we had let each other know we both were having the desire .All was going great even the last time we talked and poof she was gone.No answer to phone call's or text,geeze I even deleted my profile thought we were moving to the next level.Oh well I guess it's better to feel something even if it's pain and move on.Still makes you wonder what went on in her mind.
 untamed one
Joined: 3/28/2007
Msg: 5
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/15/2008 12:52:53 AM
Perhaps he met someone in that 30 days ? Dated , fell in love , had sex , was ready for serious commmittment ...and oh yea one more thing , gotta delete that profile ...
 SportsterChik
Joined: 7/17/2007
Msg: 6
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/15/2008 7:32:28 AM
[- i'm just a dumb romantic at heart - so everytime i think i've found the 'one' i poof from this POF world and then SURPRISE!! i'm back!!!!]

And that is the honorable thing to do. Often when people meet and it is going well one of them doesn't remove their profile, as if to be searching for something better all the while. I guess someone just isn't that into the other!

As far as disappearing: having only chatted on line then being gone 30 days, don't take it personal. There was no actual in-persona relationship yet. My experience is those that want to chat leading up to meeting, then suggest meeting, then suddenly disappear, or no show! Now that is just rude. Sheesh, just say no thanks. You don't owe me an explanation but at least exit with some class.
 SportsterChik
Joined: 7/17/2007
Msg: 7
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/15/2008 7:37:44 AM
from my2cntsin: [Hate to tell you this but a whole lot of guys on here are looking for drama momma's that have oodles of baggage..looking for a short term knight in shining armour.

It's a shame that women that are worth something...get dumped for a ditz..]


You hit the nail on the head, sister~! When you can stand on your own two feet they are all.....buh bye.

It takes a strong man to have a partner not a follower.

How does that Cheryl Crow song go.... Are you strong enough to be my man?
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 8
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History
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/15/2008 7:44:14 AM
While the focus of disinterest has been placed squarely on this particular poofer, I have to question your interest level, OP. If it was going as well as you state, why would you not have exchanged phone numbers and called while you were overseas for a month? Did you not have access to a computer to continue emailing, also? That said, it seems lame on his part to not at least send you a Dear Jane email before he commenced his poofing.




~ds~
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 10
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History
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/15/2008 1:35:11 PM
williamaus: "4/ He may be deceased, but we hope not."

Unlikely.....if something suddenly drastic happened to him, his profile would still be present (though obviously inactive).....profiles don't poof, people poof....upon sudden demises.




~ds~
 countrymanisgentle
Joined: 1/15/2008
Msg: 13
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/15/2008 3:16:59 PM
Yes and they also really ENJOY THE GAME! It's something that feeds their ego or flips their lid. Then they can say and brag to their friends, "hey look what I did to him/her on POF". "I had buckets of fun, didn't I"?

Had it happen to me also, several times. More with the many online/phone communications, but also have had them do that to me once we have met. Everything was soooo great and fantastic at the first meet. Talked with one for 1 and 1/2 hours, another one 2 hours, still another one for 2 and 1/2 hours. IN PERSON, face to face, while holding each others hands! It was REALLY going to happen, so they said!

And it did: They went ***POOOOOOF*** !!!
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 15
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History
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:45:01 PM
^^^ "Do you ever message them to see?"

Well....uhhh, no....but....uhhh....Hey, they poofed, not me! Don't even go there, Mister! Evidently, you've never been poofed!





~ds~
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 17
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/16/2008 9:27:38 AM
~OP~ The POF Poofing People. They are a hybrid of sorts. They are bottom-dwellers/suckers pretending to be salmon or halibut. You have to learn to throw those fish back before they steal the bait from a fish worth catching. (And yes, it's happened to us all I think.)
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 19
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History
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/17/2008 9:00:21 PM
I would not think that he change his profile and his picture is wearing a big sunglasses ..
 spiderette
Joined: 6/28/2008
Msg: 20
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/17/2008 10:28:09 PM
You know what I think it is? Online, there are so many people that it's easy to not take anyone too seriously. Whether you blow them off because you're just not in the mood, because you've met someone else, or what have you, people tend to think there's a never ending supply, so there's no urgency about any one person. Anyway, that's how I feel if I'm not in a hurry to get something going online (I'm referring to a different service, BTW, as I don't date on POF). I just figure it'll wait and if it disappears, then so be it. The only time I feel differently is if someone really strikes my fancy. Then I'm in the same boat as everyone esle...lol wondering why he's not calling!

The point is: it's often not really a personal thing. It's just a natural tendency for people to assume there's no rush - unless, of course, there is lightening. Of course, lightening is far less likely to happen in such an environment because it's far too easy to assume there's no urgency, so people are far less likely than usual to give a 2nd look to someone who might potentially be a thrilling match. Kind of the Miss America effect in some ways. So many choices that (1) one assumes there's a never ending supply and (2) they all pale next to each other.

In any event, people tend to depersonalize with somany choices. The irony is they are much less likely to feel satisfied with as many people as would be the normal offline case. It's sort of a weird paradigm, but it's definitely in effect online!
 countrymanisgentle
Joined: 1/15/2008
Msg: 22
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/17/2008 10:58:36 PM
One I emailed responded back after I ask why no response sooner when she had PROMISED the next day or two and I had waited over a week: "WELL, I'll have you know I travel all over the state EVERY day to work with children, have two properties I am caring for, am trying to buy some additional real estate, go to school part time, and assist my teenage son with school"!!! Yet she was on POF not just EVERY day, but some days several times a day.

I told her she was full of sh!t and a damn liar!

Another was supposed to call or email back just today: same thing; on POF several times a day, on Instant Message which means "I am on here live right now". She ask me what my problem was and to be more patient.

Yeah, I wait while she is chatting on computer and talking on the phone to her cream- of-the-crop choices!!!

Really honest, truthful, sincere, dependable, responsible, kind, christian people.
 Vonstallin
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 25
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History
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 8/28/2008 4:33:29 PM
Yep!
I think we all here have been ""POOFED"" here at POF....sigh...it will get better...one day...one day.....lol..
 GlindaTheGoodWitch
Joined: 5/23/2008
Msg: 26
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**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 1/15/2009 5:17:50 PM
I poof occasionally myself, but usually in the privacy of my own home. Usually, though not always.
 GlindaTheGoodWitch
Joined: 5/23/2008
Msg: 27
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History
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 1/15/2009 6:09:41 PM
Ms. Flis -

When Glinda the Good Witch does that, it is referred to as "twinkles."

(Fluttering eyelashes).
 FastReb
Joined: 1/3/2009
Msg: 28
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History
**Poof** They're Gone
Posted: 1/29/2009 10:03:00 PM
mcv, I'd hope that you'd do the exact same thing again. Don't let that other person's actions turn you into them, someone with no class and no courtesy.
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