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 curiousaboutu77
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 3
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such thingsPage 2 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
I think a vibrator is one of those things that turns on in the electric train and the whole thing starts rattling, it rattles my fillings, is that the vibrator your refering to? lol

I was under the impression that sex doesn't really have any particular meaning, for example, sex can mean that you just need it or it can mean love or making up or realizing a fantasy, merging with someone and just feeling emotionally at one, it can mean getting back at someone, it can mean proving something to yourself or conquest or it can mean not feeling alone. Sex has all sorts of different meanings all through our life at different times so i guess it would be better to ask what did a particular sexual act mean to you rather then what does sex mean in general. i don't know just my thoughts.
 lok
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 6
Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/17/2008 2:50:44 AM
toys etc give an escape , a release , but in the big picture , it doesnt come close to the feeling of shared emotion that comes from intimacy with a person of the opposite sex ( or same sex if thats how you play the game ). With toys , your in control of how it plays out , with a partner , there is that "unknown" fact that turns the tables.. are they going to speed up , slow down , change position , moan louder etc.

Yes , being intimate with a partner you love is pretty much the ultimate high , but if you dont have that , a good movie and a quick trip to the fridge can suffice!!!
 gjay1
Joined: 6/1/2007
Msg: 10
Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/17/2008 4:50:46 AM
i got the funniest email video about a cucumber....girl comes home from work to find mum and dad visiting....boyfriend assures her he has looked after them and made lovely sandwiches for them.....which they are enjoying......she says ..".oh did you shop - there was nothing here".......he says " its ok , there was a cucumber in the fridge........"
 AbbieF
Joined: 6/24/2007
Msg: 12
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/17/2008 5:58:10 AM
I agreed with you 63off till i got to the vulnerable - when im holdin the whip - vulnerable is not in my vocab
 InSydney
Joined: 3/14/2007
Msg: 33
Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/19/2008 6:09:36 AM
Just a curiosity thing - What do women think of men who use for example a rubber vagina for stimulation?

Disclaimer: Not that I would be seen dead with one LOL!
 missmilly1970
Joined: 11/4/2007
Msg: 37
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/20/2008 6:45:16 AM
My vibrator doesn't snore or hog the bed, but it doesn't kiss well, have a really nice butt or hold a good conversation either!

It serves a purpose during a drought!
 missmilly1970
Joined: 11/4/2007
Msg: 50
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/22/2008 5:31:10 AM
Don't know, never had a drought!

Hope the "divining rod" line works out for you though! Keep telling the girls that. Eventually someone will believe you!

Good luck!!!
 lok
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 52
Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/22/2008 6:40:39 AM
Might add another bit here , sometimes you cannot find time to have sex , these days we work harder and longer , and our bodys arent always in sync with our partners ( for those who actually have them ) , so to get yourself off with toys is a way to release tension and relax , and it releases endorphines and other stuff to relax you , like the stuff in tea does , cant remember what it is atm.. brain no function @ 11.40pm AEST

Lok out
 InSydney
Joined: 3/14/2007
Msg: 55
Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/23/2008 10:55:57 AM

Another product I would`nt bother trying to sell was the male pump..... whoever thought guys would be able to blow that part of themselves up to a larger size by putting a sleeve around it and... pumping, must have been drunk or dreaming. But apparently its one of the most commonly sold to short guys... I read that in the blurb that came with the catalogue book for sexpo...at acost of over $100 mostly.. cheaper to buy a vaccuum cleaner and get another service out of it!


I'm always looking for new and unique uses for my household appliances LOL! Now, what happens if it doesn't work? Do I still get to say "This vacuum cleaner sucks!"

You might be a wicked woman but I like the way your mind works
 onmy own
Joined: 3/16/2008
Msg: 56
Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/25/2008 4:26:38 PM
If a man knows what he;s doing and takes his time to massage, and use his fingers as much as possible to make a womean cum several times , to finally make love, and slowly penertrate, until the womam wants it right in , the woman would be satisfied. I she wants more at the end , then so it should be. Awoman is to be pleased and treated with respect. She is a god. She has a beautifl bodu regardless of size. So treat her carectly and she will always want your****
 missmilly1970
Joined: 11/4/2007
Msg: 58
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/26/2008 7:14:45 AM
My last two toys,
my ex bought for me. Then he went to Iraq for three months.

He knew what they did, how they worked, & how he could work them & himself!!

We broke up when he got back. The toys work.

Still haven't met anyone who can work it like he did!!! (Not talking about the toys! They still work!) Miss him though!

How can so few Men know what they're doing??

It's not that difficult surely?????
 missmilly1970
Joined: 11/4/2007
Msg: 65
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 8/28/2008 5:54:26 AM
Ohhhhh

ToldYouSo,

I'm sure you're used to hearing from girls with toys!

You seem to be very confident with inanimate objects!

Hope that works out well for you & your life partner!

Yes really............ some girls/guys think Viagra rocks!

It doesn't matter......... it happens to lots of guys...................LMAO!!
 photoman001
Joined: 11/25/2006
Msg: 72
Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 9/2/2008 8:49:15 AM
Well I guess if they can make a cucumber or a virator that can play with your hair, kiss your neck and your earlobes, caress your back, rub your shoulders, tease your nipples and graze fingernails down your back then by a dozen. If you can get a carrot or a banana to know when you are so close to screaming that it slows down a while just to tease you then buy them too. Billy Connelly says he remembers his first sexual experience, he was alone at the time. For me, well I reakon that orgasm comes right at the end, getting there should be a hell of a lot of fun and just might take hours........ I mean if I just want an orgasm I can take matters into my own hands. If I want sex then that needs another warm body.
 sethdom
Joined: 3/26/2007
Msg: 86
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 6/3/2009 10:11:19 PM
Kudos for even having the courage to address the prickly subject.....no pun intended with respect to the cuke!

No confusion, merely bemusal. I suppose I am not equipped to respond for all, but from the first person singular I feel compelled to iterate that sexual urges are as innate as the need to breathe. We are programmed with the need to feel.....on all levels. Sexual satisfaction ought to be a wonderful bonus to a stimulating relationship, but often substitution affords interim pleasure and release be it battery operated or otherwise. So many euphamisms so little time.

Personally I believe that insecurity prevents us from exploring completely with a willing partner...but at the same time religion and society ooze guilt upon us for a desire to freely feel and express. Sex is not dirty. It is natural. I believe it is confused attempts at regulation that make us feel "dirty" when we desire.

How can something so wonderfully satisfying be dirty? Between the legs is obvious but taboo. Why? Not sure. Perhaps because we are taught the taboos? It is implied that it is unclean to feel this way? We need to understand our desires and needs then "fingerpaint". Ok, that was random.....but seriously....are our fears valid or imprinted upon us by flawed logic? A union between whomever ought to be revered and shared as beautiful.

I am but one man, but I tend to seek four levels of intimacy. Beginning with intellectual stimulation, emotional....physical then spritual.....no, not religious....when two connect on a higher plane it is a spiritual revelation. What more can one ask for? Not for the feint of heart but for the believer.

Don't settle for self esteem issues. That generally ends tragically. Seek like minded individuals and explore. It still ought to be fun! Break through some barriers without prejudice.....find someone who agrees.....then enjoy. Until then....freeze your vegetables....recharge your batteries.....don't let anyone make you feel "dirty" for loving that higher plane that makes you euphoric....with.....or without a partner.

They do exist. They simply require your introduction.

; )

In my humble opinion anyway.
 rocketsOD
Joined: 2/15/2009
Msg: 88
Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 6/7/2009 4:31:40 PM
*
Best thing about cucumbers and sex?? You can have your cuke and eat it too!
*
 photoman001
Joined: 11/25/2006
Msg: 89
Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 6/8/2009 6:24:46 AM
Sex is only 'dirty' if you're doing it right!
 Worbug
Joined: 4/23/2009
Msg: 90
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 11/5/2009 9:46:03 PM
Do you think the person that invinted the first vibrater heard a voice,

"If You Build It, They Will Cum"

Just a thought.
 greyingred
Joined: 6/12/2008
Msg: 93
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 11/5/2009 11:58:49 PM

I've seen some weird salad recipes in my time, but this one takes the cake.


lol remind me not to eat your food...salad cake using preloved ingredients....oh yuck!!! don't tell me what the icing consists of especially if it looks suspiciously like mayonaise.

Msg 114. The reason why it, sex, genitalia (weird word that one) has been a taboo subject for centuries (sorta) is due to the lack of contraception. As you stated it is a natural almost insurpressable urge and the only way to prevent younguns getting into trouble was to demonise and scare the bejasus outa them.

Oh and wanking in theory can make you blind....men that is....sperm production uses a fair amount of zinc which also paramount for healthy eyesight.
 greyingred
Joined: 6/12/2008
Msg: 98
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 11/6/2009 10:59:53 PM
For all who are wondering how the fvck I know anything about cucumbers... I worked in the produce section of a small country town supermarket... and the comments I got have scarred me for life


Yeah Yeah!! One wonders if you got the word wrong and instead of comments you meant actions. and cucumbers can't scar, rambutans, horse chestnuts, anything spikey will scar but not the smooth, cooly green, seedless (no need to use condoms then) cucumber.

Reasons why cucumbers are better than men.
You can feel your cucumber before you buy it.
Cucumbers do not complain when other cucumbers are in the fridge.
When all else fails you can slice your cucumber thinly.
SPF30............lol
Ah how things have changed. In my day it was vaseline

if one is considering a fruity alternative with a much prettier colour and larger girth...aubergines....almost like an african...almost if you fancy greek you could rat-it-to-me...oh dear the jokes are bad today...must be the time of the growing season.
 greyingred
Joined: 6/12/2008
Msg: 101
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 11/9/2009 2:51:57 AM
yes but Men do not taste good between two slices of white bread, crustless and sprinkled with salt. It produces much the same reaction you get with slugs and the last time I ate a slug (aged below 4) my subconsciou remembers it was revolting.devil:

am I asking too much???
Probably. Shame you canna hydroponic healthy luscious men.
 greyingred
Joined: 6/12/2008
Msg: 103
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Cucumbers and Vibrators and other such things
Posted: 11/9/2009 10:13:01 PM

never had a woman suggest that? bet he was glad you didn't want the chilli pepper .....
Don't knock it until you have tried it...tis the same as using cocaine in many ways........numbingly, startlingly over sensitised.

how many girls peel their fruit companions before use?...


oh dear sir....I prefer mine pre peeled(no longer the fashion unless jewish)...some of the peels have the most oddest of shapes, long and saggy, short and tight, some are pretty, most are ugly, some look somewhat like those puppies with folds and folds of skin alluding to largeness hiding smallness...either way I would prefer pre peeled or if the skin is lumpy, bumpy etc...they can bring their own peeler and do it themselves.
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