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 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 88
Do you wonder when to say I love you?Page 4 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
I say I love you a lot.
and when I say it I mean it.
Doesn't mean I expect you to say it back to me.
Doesn't even mean I expect you to love me.
It just means I LOVE YOU.
I don't think anyone else can tell you when you're
ready to say you love someone. I think people have
different definitions of what love means to them
and I don't think the word love is overused.
But then I like to keep things simple...so what do I know.
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 99
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 2/21/2009 8:11:33 AM
Not long after we met... a few months I guess... I said to my sweetie "I know you love me."
(It was obvious from his way of being)
I still chuckle out loud whenever I remember the look of total shock that raced across his face before we collapsed into laughter.
He says, now that he's been told, he'll love me until I tell him to stop.
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 100
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 2/21/2009 10:07:48 AM
saying "i love you" is like toothpaste, -once you say it -it cant go back in the tube




^^^^and if the other person does not react appropriately, you wind up with it all over your face...............


Or on you're clothing...and we know it's a b!tch to get toothpaste off you're clothing once it's on there Hey, you might want to try the new auto toothpaste dispenser built right into the toothbrush.

When to say " I love you"...when you're not worried about taking it back...*grins*


...maeflowers
 adittodude
Joined: 8/22/2008
Msg: 105
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 2/22/2009 5:14:57 AM
I take it you dont believe in love at first sight. I do. I think that after you have chatted for awhile before meeting that you have an attraction for the person you are about to meet. You know fairly well who they are inside and and have an idea what they are offering to bring into a relationship and so on. Although words are cheap and everything has to be proven in real life situations. People always say physical attraction doesnt matter. Well I think they are lieing to some degree. You cant tell me that you can meet a lady with more hair on her face than you or a guy that is so large that he has been sweating since he got in the car and smells like a paper mill, that you can overlook that. Once you finally meet that special someone, you kinda put it all together as a package and make a decission if you could see spending the rest of your life with this person. By the end of the first meeting you either begin a love attraction or you dont. I believe Love starts immediately and then grows every day that you spend with that person. Once it stops growing daily, its only a matter of time before you go your seperate ways.
 OldFolkie
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 115
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 3/14/2009 6:49:29 PM
"In vino veritas?"

or perhaps that's more often "In Vino....oops"

 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 116
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 3/14/2009 7:35:17 PM

This is why it's dangerous to drink wine.... the stuff that comes out of ones mouth at the most inappropriate time....


I made a phone call to an ex once, I was at home alone feeling a bit tipsy and a bit lonesome, the two don't mix....my blood ran cold the next day when I thought about it.

...maeflowers
 Rythmn
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 120
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 3/30/2009 10:53:28 PM
with my last SO, i didn't wonder when to say it, i wondered when i'd hear it! of course, he insisted his actions "spoke" to me.

okay, so "also" let me hear it! after all, i too treated him nicely with "actions". well, he didn't say it, 'cause he feared it. i left after three years. he did the crying. i've said it before and i'll say it til the cows come home. when a plant needs water, singing to it, just ain't gonna help.
 pleasurelimits
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 124
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 5/14/2009 7:51:13 AM
I honestly believe if you feel it, say it, if it brings rejection then you were not on the same page anyway, and you might as well find out. I started out by testing the waters by saying I am falling in real 'like' with you which is a forerunner to deeper things so if this scares you then you better jump ship now. She fell for it, silly girl and ended up loving me, how good is that. Now we both are head over heels so be brave, never know what it will bring
 WanderingRain
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 133
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 5/17/2009 8:23:10 PM
ooo! I believe she said the 3 words first than me... Then of course, I just responded with "I love you... too."
I wonder though, when my next relationship comes around... who will end up saying it first? Stay tuned, I guess!

 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 138
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 10/8/2009 5:39:56 AM
And here I always heard that the lack of women in OZ caused that kind of thing between the men........

Groan. What chance do I have..........javascript:smilie('')
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 139
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 10/8/2009 2:35:35 PM
During the courtship, I spent *months* literally biting my tongue, acutely aware if I said it, I'd scare the bejebus outta him. I didn't, he finally did, and we got married and had babies. At the end, I realized I'd have been well served if I'd scared him away, lol!

Since, I've said it when I felt it. If it scared them away, that was a good thing -- saved me ten or so years trying to work out our different styles of relationships.

 StevieCashmere
Joined: 4/22/2009
Msg: 140
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 10/8/2009 2:46:36 PM
Balance between thinking about it & feeling it
~sc~
 ninjaeleven
Joined: 7/15/2009
Msg: 145
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 10/9/2009 10:56:57 PM
I usually say it about the 3rd or 4th thrust.
 Buckets_of_Sky
Joined: 2/7/2010
Msg: 146
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 6/23/2010 3:52:22 PM
I only wish that in the English language that there were more words for the different types of love... one size does not fit all.
 URXO2
Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 148
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 6/25/2010 10:43:22 AM
the OP is long gone but she'd stated she'd been seeing this fellow about
two months and was wondering if that's too soon to say I love you..
obviously it must not have been too soon, maybe the rest of us will hear
those words too...
 Patien$e
Joined: 2/2/2010
Msg: 149
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 7/6/2010 6:49:43 AM
What if you return an I love you because you had a third martini and you know how much the other person wants to hear it, has been waiting to hear it, and you really like the person and want him to be happy. So you say it and to you it sounds flat but it's out there. Once of twice afterwards, you return the guy's I love you but then you stop because it just feels wrong. Do you tell him I like you a heck of a lot but my I love you was premature?
 URXO2
Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 150
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 7/6/2010 2:16:56 PM
^^^That's an extremely difficult position to be in,
he's offering you one of the greatest gifts he has to offer,
you're not sure you want to except or give him your gift
of love in return..
 curviest
Joined: 5/28/2010
Msg: 151
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 9/1/2010 2:04:11 AM
Wish I had read this thread months ago!

I wish I had never told my man that I love him. I lost something when I said it, maybe status, power, his respect, my mystique, my dignity?

None of those words sound quite right but something along those lines.

I thought he loved me back because of the way he looks at me, cherishes me etc.

He replied "Aw that's sweet."

I knew then, he doesn't feel the same way.

Cue the crying, the degrading of myself lower and lower. It's a wonder he has a shred of respect left for me. He says he's never felt as though he were "in love" with anyone. He feels affection, he likes to spend time with me, values me as a friend, enjoys me as a lover. My declaration scared him -- what impact, he asked himself, was my love going to have on his freedom? What did I expect from him? What demands was I likely to start making upon him, his time, his future? Jeez I am lucky I didn't lose him!

My only strategy for regaining my dignity now is to pretend it was "just a phase" of infatuation I went through, which has now passed. Menopausal hormones, not my fault.

My biggest challenge now is to make sure I never say it again!

So, I agree with the person who said, keep it to yourself! Never, never say it till after HE has!
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 153
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 9/1/2010 7:22:50 AM

Wish I had read this thread months ago!

I wish I had never told my man that I love him. I lost something when I said it, maybe status, power, his respect, my mystique, my dignity?

None of those words sound quite right but something along those lines.

I thought he loved me back because of the way he looks at me, cherishes me etc.

He replied "Aw that's sweet."

I knew then, he doesn't feel the same way.

Cue the crying, the degrading of myself lower and lower. It's a wonder he has a shred of respect left for me. He says he's never felt as though he were "in love" with anyone. He feels affection, he likes to spend time with me, values me as a friend, enjoys me as a lover. My declaration scared him -- what impact, he asked himself, was my love going to have on his freedom? What did I expect from him? What demands was I likely to start making upon him, his time, his future? Jeez I am lucky I didn't lose him!

My only strategy for regaining my dignity now is to pretend it was "just a phase" of infatuation I went through, which has now passed. Menopausal hormones, not my fault.

My biggest challenge now is to make sure I never say it again!

So, I agree with the person who said, keep it to yourself! Never, never say it till after HE has!


I'm sorry you feel this way. Already this situation you are in is changing you to
someone you don't want to be. There is nothing wrong with expressing how you
feel about someone. The fact they don't feel the same is hurtful, but why change
yourself to suit someone else? Be who you are and find someone who deserves you.
 Secondhand_Lion
Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 154
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 11/12/2010 3:48:34 PM
I usually hold off until she's got about 12,000 miles on the odometer and hasn't needed to go back to the dealership.
 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 155
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 11/12/2010 3:55:56 PM
^^ good one!!!


I'll say "I love you" at the time I know I love him.
I wonder why people feel they need to figure that out, seems simple to me.
 Secondhand_Lion
Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 156
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Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 11/14/2010 8:56:35 PM
^^^^Hummm, You mean that should be said before she leaves?.....dang, I always thought you saved that as a last resort if you wanted her to come back.
 Smarts and Heart
Joined: 12/15/2009
Msg: 159
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 11/18/2010 7:56:43 AM
There are different humorous ways of expressing "I love you";

I really, really, really like you!

You're growing on me...keep it up!

You're growing on me ; somewhat like a fungus!

You're becoming my addiction!

I can see ourselves pushing walkers side by side!

I'm getting close to feeling the "L" word!

I adore you!

You feel good to me!

You feel good in my life!

Etc. It's never quite the same as saying the "I love you" but if it's not reciprocated, these forms of expressing affection can be less threatening.

Let's face it, the only reason people are gun shy to say and hear the words is "baggage" with past failed relationships. Heaven only knows that the world is full of heart break, sorrows, betrayals and all the rest. Sometimes it's easier for some to express their feelings by actions. I'd rather have that, than someone who constantly tells me he loves me with words, but his actions show the opposite on a daily basis.

I'm a "show me" type of gal!



 Jillian1963
Joined: 1/31/2011
Msg: 160
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 3/14/2011 12:53:31 PM
I have a cute story I have been dating this great guy for two months. We had a great night friday night I made dinner...we had a few drinks, alot of talking romantic music..you can guess the rest. So we are ready to go to sleep facing away from each other.........and he asks ''do you think you could fall in love with me someday''? My responce was '' I think I could in time'' I hesitate for a moment and ask him the same thing. his reply was'' I think I could in time....I waited and added in time.....and we both just fell asleep. I thought was so romantic.
 BigBadNIrish
Joined: 1/31/2011
Msg: 161
Do you wonder when to say I love you?
Posted: 4/5/2011 4:22:55 PM

Do you wonder when to say I love you?


I say it every day...

But, with a new lover...I really haven't the foggest idea.
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