|clueless?Page 2 of 4 (1, 2, 3, 4)|
|ohhh hooo huuuummmm Here we go again roses,,, oh sorry OP what is your name this time? As mentioned above,, your posts demanding that a man looks after you while you do nothing are really painting a picture of you that is not pleasant. I can not believe some controlling male hasn't already snapped you up, if you expect someone (be it male or female) to pay for everything, expect them to own you. |
I am very proud of being independent and I will always pay my own way,, I will try not to go over board again and pay half their way as well,,, but no matter what I will always pay my own way.
I do believe it is nice for someone you are dating to pay for something every now and again,,, but still it works both ways,, or at least it should.
Posted: 8/22/2008 5:52:56 AM
|Happy to go dutch!|
First date........... if I ask him out........ I pay. If asks me out. He pays. Second date......... even.
I guess it depends.......... if you are the type of girl who never asks out a guy.... go halves!!!
Girls should ask guys though. It's not that hard.
Am I mistaken???? Guys really don't mind a girl making the first move???? A whole other question I guess!
Posted: 8/22/2008 4:17:17 PM
|Once again Op you have posted a troll thread then done a runner not being involved in the discussion you generated.|
Neither men nor women find attractive a person who demands to be taken care of. If you want a man to pay for everything and take care of you rather than contributing to your own mental and physical wellbeing, and society then get off your arse and move to a society where women are trophies to be kept inside and breeding and taken out on occasion.
Long live independence and sharing
Posted: 8/23/2008 3:26:49 AM
|I think that it is very dangerous to be totally reliant on someone financially as what happens if they disappear?? Will you be left with a mortgage no job and kids in tow? I think you need something to fall back on in a marriage if things go horribly wrong even if it is just a part time job or something. What happens if priorities change and you want to move on from a relationship? will you have the means to do so? It is all well and good to be looked after but at what expense?|
Posted: 8/24/2008 12:41:47 AM
i need help with the dating situation? when someone asks you out they should pay right? after all that person does think something of you to have asked you out in the first place right? so.. who pays? personally i think that a man should pay the whole way. that makes me feel somewhat like a woman. i want some chivalry back and thats part of it. what do you think??clueless..
WTF????.......you may want to reconsider this statement!!!!!!!!!
I hear an echo echo echo
Posted: 8/24/2008 10:58:16 PM
Re message 21:
ooops that's a bit to harsh.
No it isn't actualy and that is my opinion, I get sick and tired of the same posts from this person and as mentioned before she never replies once she has started.
After reading your post I can understand why you think I was a bit harsh. Avery very big difference of opinion.
Posted: 8/25/2008 12:11:16 AM
|^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ i agree mac! most men will be happy to fork out 4 the meal out of common courtesy! im my case, it is appreciated when the lady offers to buy a couple of drinks. u can realise the date is not there just to sponge up as much goodwill as u are willing to part with as has been a few dates i have been on! its not pretty thinking u are just a walking atm! still, thats the tightrope we all walk on here!|
Posted: 8/26/2008 11:07:19 PM
|^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ spot on missfee! a man can still show the right amount of courtesy+enjoy the date without stepping on toes! dont get me wrong, i usually do insist on paying for the date, i just appreciate when a lady does offer to hop up+ grab some drinks!+ yes, the whole idea of meeting up is to hopefully find that elusive spark!its much easier for a bloke to really be his natural self when he is not thinking about taking out a 2nd mortgage to satisfy the lady,s appetite!!!! lol|
Posted: 8/27/2008 12:15:35 AM
|Missfeel you had ya fingers burnt before?|
Whats wrong with generosity of self and spirit? I am happy for either party to pick up the bill doesnt really matter as long as its done respectfully and not in the spirit of "he can pay he is the man" ... those days are gone when women dont work anymore and have no income though if you ask someone on a low income out you wouldnt expect them to pay for the meal. I know my friends and I always share costs one picks up the meal the other the coffees etc and the same on dates.. if I pay for the meal then he should pay for drinks and vice versa but its all personal .. if you ask someone out and they say I would love to but cant afford it would you say o well another time then or would you say dont be silly you buy the bottle of wine I'll shout dinner this time??
Posted: 8/28/2008 7:24:23 AM
|I think that it entirely depends on the situation. If the man and woman are married, the woman usually physically pays the bill because she is the keeper of the money.|
But in a first date scenario, both should pay if both are working. Even if the man insists of paying for the meal, you should, as a lady, pay for both your drinks.
This shows the man that you will not be brought off by a meal. Otherwise, you will end up paying for it, but in a different kind of way.
BTW chivalry has nothing to do with money. I think for a first date, the man should pick the girl up, that is chivalry. Paying for the meal, not now days. Afterall, women now have evolved from the 1950's housewife.
Posted: 8/28/2008 5:56:15 PM
|Pardon my intrusion in the Aus threads, but your post struck a chord with me.|
I understand your dilemma and have had this type of situation happen myself.
My feeling is I should offer to pay even if they invited me out.
A few years back I had a gentleman whom I had been chatting with for several months ask me out on Mother's Day because he knew that all of my family were out of town and I was all alone.
When we finished eating and before he had asked the waitress for the bill, I pardoned myself to go to the ladies room thinking he would wait and we could go to the cash register and divvy up the bill.
By the time I got back he had already paid and a few days later he told me that he felt used because I chose to leave him with the bill! I explained that that was not my intent at all and had fully expected to pay my fair share if he had waited until I returned from the restroom.
To make a long story shorter, even after I apologized and explained he chose to stop conversing with me.
So, my advice is tell them upfront your intentions and views about who should pay. Will save a lot of confusion and hurt feelings.
Posted: 8/29/2008 10:12:59 AM
And do we buy our own birthday presents maybe? How about we send ourself flowers?
No silly, this is why we give them what is called "pocket money".
Posted: 8/29/2008 4:17:29 PM
|LOL! Goddess and Bucky - no fair! I never dreamt telling my story would start the 'escape to the bathroom' trend!|
Posted: 8/31/2008 7:06:01 AM
|Ok. On Friday night, I went out on a date with a real man. |
We went to the casino, he picked me up and drove me there. He paid for the parking of the vehicle, he paid for all my drinks, dinner, and even gave me some money to gamble with.
I did not ask for any of these things, except that he come and collect me from home, because I think this is the gentlemanly thing to do.
When I tried to pay for a drink for him, he got offended and told me to put my money away. I tried to pay for my share, but he would not have it.
I actually agree with the OP in this post. It does make us feel like women and more so, respected ladies.
Men like this are very hard to find and if you are lucky enough to find one, do not ever let him go.
Learn to swallow your pride just to make him happy, because this will always make a gentleman happy.
Posted: 8/31/2008 8:54:50 PM
Oh how things can change
See what can happen when you let a man be a man? Who would have thought hey?
FYI, I wasn't brought off either. Because he is a gentleman.
Posted: 8/31/2008 9:12:22 PM
|Ok ok I admit it. Hey I can be treated every once in a while. I didn't break any rules. I didn't sleep with him. He brought me a few drinks and brought my dinner. But it was the company I enjoyed most. Not the benefits. |
No where was that other women's libbers thread?
Which one is that? The one where I burned my bra!
Posted: 9/1/2008 1:26:04 AM
A bit like your date did
Reminds me of a few lines of a song by Heart.
We made magic that night.
Oh, he did everything right
He brought the woman out of me,
So many times, easily
Not that I did anything, but he did make me feel special with the little things he did.
Posted: 9/1/2008 2:09:39 AM
|Hmmmmm. It's interesting how the mind of a woman works......|
a) If you can be 'bought off' with a meal, I'd say he sees you as an easy pick up and a meal is cheaper than a hooker, and he gets to eat as well as &^%$.
So which is worse? A man who gets sex but pays for dinner or a woman who gets sex AND a free dinner? Why do women have this superiority complex and think that it's just the man who gets something from the women IF sex is part of the date? Doesn't she get sex as well? Or is she just doing the guy a favour?
Posted: 9/11/2011 5:42:56 AM
|Look here's the deal, I'll supply the drugs and protection. You girls get the money. OK ... simple.|
Posted: 9/23/2011 12:07:01 AM
|I prefer to pay for myself because, so often, when the guy pays he thinks he has automatically bought sex with me and that's just wrong.|
Posted: 9/23/2011 4:06:19 AM
|I must be doing something wrong, you mean to say that if I take a woman out and buy/ pay for her meal and drinks then I can expect to have sex??|
Damn if that is the case no wonder I am not getting any sex because I don't have that expectation, I look for the companionship and a nice meal.
When did this change?
Why wasn't I told?
Posted: 9/23/2011 3:38:27 PM
|I think the man should pay the whole way is a fairly outmoded concept and unrealistic in these times when there's so much financial uncertainly and so many people are struggling. I think it's asking a lot for someone to blow a lot of money on someone they've just met.|
Posted: 1/21/2012 12:15:37 AM
|Me thinks some people are over thinking this..|
Why not put on your profile that your not interested in sex for meal situation.
Posted: 1/23/2012 3:36:36 AM
|...............Me thinks some people are over thinking this..|
too true, unless there blonde