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 kari135
Joined: 9/1/2009
Msg: 436
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?Page 7 of 28    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28)
I'd much rather do it than talk about it, does that count?
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 439
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/3/2010 5:45:31 PM
...If this question was posed to me when I was in my early thirties I would have replied that it wasn't important to me at all. Up until that point, I had never experienced good sex....you don't miss what you've never had.

And then I met my second husband......I had "NO" idea. Enough said.

...mae
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 440
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/3/2010 6:23:51 PM
Ya.

I remember when the Hite Report came out, getting it and reading it, and being stunned to hear some women describing an orgasm as a "sneeze" ~~ but I guess you work with what Ma Nature gifted you, and you sure can't do much about that.

 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 441
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/5/2010 7:33:29 AM
I think sex is important to a relationship because that is an expression of love of any age, to the opposite sex,that we are commited with.
It is true we are in advance age, but if our body is healthy we have no problem with our sexuality. But if we have problems of getting along with our partner's attitude /their hygience/groomimg that drag us down,then we lose interested in sex with him and look for another person,sometimes some women felt it is icky to have sex with their partner and happy with no sex at all,then it arises some mental dyfunction like bipolar, sickness, unnecessary spending ,drinking,gambling, etc.,addictions to fill the void in them..
As an advance age woman, sexual urge did not deminish ,but I have more control of my body ,for my common sense govern my emotion even in my hey day...
Sex is just in the mind..
 lonelydavid77
Joined: 5/7/2007
Msg: 442
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/5/2010 9:39:01 AM
Sex is more than just in the mind!

Sex is a component of existance. Healthy sex is an attitude. I spent 33 years in a marriage, sex was limited in the last 15 years because of her attitude towards it, and yet, in the first 18 years, it happened all the time (well you may know what I mean).

The worst thing about sex.........................................is not getting any!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 443
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/5/2010 10:54:49 AM

The worst thing about sex.........................................is not getting any!!!!!!!!!!!!!



...Oh please, let's not go there. I'll have everyone in tears.
Besides, I would rather have no sex than bad sex. Been there, done that


...mae
 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 444
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/5/2010 11:48:23 AM
It's very important, but best within a relationship...the issue is that there isn't much out there.
 lonelydavid77
Joined: 5/7/2007
Msg: 446
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/5/2010 12:14:13 PM

.....I would rather have no sex than bad sex. Been there, done that..


If you actually confess that you have bad sex, then I would have to say the person with whom you had the sex was not educated enough in the ways of pleasuring to the fullest to have left you feeling that way, he was bad at, not the "act". (if it was a he!!)!

There are things that should be done before, during and after the "act" to ensure each partner is comprehensively indulged in the intricacies of feeling satisfaction and therefore, good sex. Yes, women take a bit more time to get to those climactic moments, but if the man wants seconds or thirds, he dang well better learn some of the techniques for ensuring his partner get there before he does, even if it takes all night to do it!!

 kari135
Joined: 9/1/2009
Msg: 448
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/5/2010 12:25:33 PM

If you actually confess that you have bad sex, then I would have to say the person with whom you had the sex was not educated enough in the ways of pleasuring to the fullest to have left you feeling that way, he was bad at, not the "act".

Let me see... it's been so long ago...

Oh, yeah. The first time I had really bad sex was the time I got beat up and raped. He wasn't interested in pleasuring anyone but himself.

The second time... we'll have to lump a whole lot into one episode. That was my first husband, and somehow I don't think it would have gone over very well if I'd told him he was a dud. He wasn't nterested in plesuring anyone but himself, either.

All in all, it's a very good thing I've met some very nice - and talented - men along the way since then. But it also reinforces my idea that bad sex is not better than no sex, and it has a whole lot more to do with things other than technique. That Tab A >> Slot B is so passe at this stage of life.
 lonelydavid77
Joined: 5/7/2007
Msg: 449
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/5/2010 1:50:24 PM
I'm getting the impression, and I admit, there is a lot more to sex than just the physical part of it.

Technique is a combination of knowing what to do (physical), when to do it(emotional), and a big part of that is why (more of both) and the feelings from within (emotional) when doing it (all of the aforementioned result in great sex).

In no way would I ever insinuate or infer that sex as part of a violent act could ever be considered good or bad, that is not what this thread was about, though the act happened, I would not even consider asking if it was good or bad, that was an invasion and should not be compared to whether one considers sex important as it once was. By the way, to those that experienced rape, and have found the power to overcome the adversities and withdrawals, kudos to you. To confess it and live shows a strength that a lot of men underrate (and some would berate) in a woman.

Some of the greatest sex experienced may never ever have the "act" of procreation involved!
 kari135
Joined: 9/1/2009
Msg: 450
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/5/2010 2:30:07 PM

To confess it and live shows a strength that a lot of men underrate (and some would berate) in a woman.

Excuse me? Confess? CONFESS? Confessing is what one does when one is guilty of something, not when one has been a victim or target of a violent act. That is exactly the kind of attitude that discourages many women from contacting the police and filing charges.
 lonelydavid77
Joined: 5/7/2007
Msg: 451
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/5/2010 2:51:00 PM
Again, my choice in wording was inappropriate without clarification for the circumstance.

I have had personal involvement with women who have been raped, and the consensus that I got from them is that they felt guilty about what had happened to them.
To confess is not just for the guilty perpretator, there are several meanings to the word.

To confess:(from the Free Dictionary)
1. To disclose (something damaging or inconvenient to oneself); admit. See Synonyms at acknowledge.
2. To acknowledge belief or faith in; profess.

The first definition is the one that I had intent of meaning. So to reword that portion my intent was to say :
"To disclose and live shows a strength that a lot of men underrate (and some would berate) in a woman."

Again, when adding to a forum, there is little room for error in the use of language appropriate for all to know exactly the writer is saying without further explanation in choice of words. I hope this exonerates the ill feelings stirred towards me.
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 452
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/6/2010 4:32:29 AM

Sex is more than just in the mind!
Sex is a component of existance. Healthy sex is an atttitude .I spent 33 years in marriage,sexwas limited in the last 15 years because of her attitude towards it,and yet ,in the first 18 years,it happened all the time( well you may know what I mean).
the worst thing about sex.....................is not getting any!!!!!!!!


Well, as I said "Sex is just in the mind" for the reason OUR MIND governs our perception then emotion then the move of our body. Our mind is the power of our existance , Some women lose the enterest of sex because of some side effect of medicine or their husband is no longer appealing..
 MAGIC_MARCO
Joined: 11/16/2007
Msg: 458
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/11/2010 4:34:10 PM

Absolutely and without a doubt sex is very important in a relationship. I've found that as I've gotten older my libido has risen and I personally find younger men a better catch. They are probably as highly sexed as me if not more and full of energy which I love.


Gosh. Here we go again. Do you believe in the Tooth Fairy ,too?
Do you know Manic_ Melanie, by any chance?
 MAGIC_MARCO
Joined: 11/16/2007
Msg: 463
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/11/2010 5:12:44 PM
I can understand that mature ladies would definitely want a mature and quality men, but it seems from the posts that sex is very important. And with men, eventually, they will have issues in that department as they age. With that logic, women will eventually start looking for younger men. Or am I missing something here?

^^^^ Counterpoint
Yes you are. Most healthy men don't have those problems.
If women ( any age) want to be with men (any age) that over eat all the wrong things, drink too much , smoke, and don't get any exercise, then they are asking for a whole lot of trouble...either now or later.
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 467
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/11/2010 8:17:16 PM
HeartTunes - msg 590

^^^I refer you to Manic Melanie and Ruby Red 63.

Considering their busy schedules and corresponding expenditure of energy, I wonder where they find time to compose all their online advertisements.
 Hippiekinkster
Joined: 1/7/2010
Msg: 469
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/11/2010 9:49:20 PM

blueyesrsmiling on 2/11/2010 922 PM
Subject: Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Message:

I'm sorry, I was not trying to offend older men here. Because aging leads to ED, healthy men generally can avoid it for longer time, but the population in general, are just average in health.


Here is the scary thing young man.......your not that far off age wise....and you never know what happens from now to the present. Life happens, people have health problems this happens to everyone.
But for me....I would rather have one great time then many crappy times whenever it comes to sex.....
And for me sex is important. Heck I am in my prime. Sometimes I feel like circling the wagons and jumping in with guns a blazing.......but I think that would scare my potential suitors.........

Yeah, I was fine until a couple years or so ago. opioid pain medication decreases testosterone production, so I use a topical drug called Androgel which partially offsets the opioid side effect. But, yanno, what with fingers and tongues and all kinds of nifty adult toys available, there are ways to overcome those difficulties.

Blueeyes, ya might as well go for broke... I know I have a penchant for assertive, submissive women.
 kissmesilly
Joined: 8/27/2006
Msg: 470
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/12/2010 2:42:27 AM
Be it good or bad, sex is as important, and necessary to me as it has ever been. Unfortunately, with working nights, and going to school,....it is not something I have been able to share with anyone. I just hope that I find the right woman when my schedual is clear again.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 472
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/12/2010 4:10:25 AM
Well, this is all a fine theoretical discussion. However, if you are not sexually involved with a partner, no matter how great the relationship, it isn't anything more than a friendship. On the other hand, if you are sexually involved, its more than a friendship.

Maybe only 5%, but its 100% of the determination of the nature of the relationship.
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 473
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/12/2010 4:23:34 AM
^^^
I agree completely with Mr. Rearguard.
So do most of the women here who use every opportunity to emphasize the importance of chemistry.
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 476
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/12/2010 5:31:19 AM
^^^
Sex becomes extremely important ..... whenever you not having it.
Then it becomes your main focus. You think about your lack of it all the time.

Not really.
When I'm not having it, I don't think about it, I don't dream about it, I'm not wondering why am I not getting it, it doesn't become my main focus.
However, when the object of my lust is close by, then it becomes extremely important.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 477
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/12/2010 5:42:09 AM
Well, of course I don't necessarily wish to get into the private details of a relationship, however, sex is a broad term, and any relationship in which there has been or is any form of sexual involvement is, to me, a sexual relationship. Just because a couple are, for some reason, unable to achieve male/female penetration does not imply their relationship is not sexual. There are loads of other ways to share physical intimacy, and while a somewhat sloppy use of the term, the loving relationship between a couple can also be a sexual one.

One that is not sexual is one where the participants have not engaged in physical intimacy. One presumes that emotional intimacy can slowly drift towards physical intimacy as well, and at some point it may be reasonable to consider the line having been crossed, even if the act has not taken place. That would be a mutual decision.

What I have found is that many people presume the nature of relationship while denying the reality of it. Sexual desire it to me a biological urge that proceeds independently of other considerations, and unless and until physical intimacy occurs, this desire leave the partners open to other options. Physical intimacy tends to cement the relationship. Until that happens, the biological need will cause people to continue the search for gratification, and they will feel quite psychologically justified in taking such opportunities as arise.

My only point is that if the facts do not include physical intimacy, the relationship is one of friendship, regardless of the thoughts, feelings, hopes and desires of the participants, and that "physical intimacy" has a broad definition.
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 482
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/12/2010 7:38:58 AM
blueyes - msg 614

So I am lusting over everything not nailed down.

Go, girl. I suspect that your last two posts will create overbooked conditions and havoc for all airlines heading for Springfield this weekend.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 483
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Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/12/2010 8:00:01 AM

If that was true we would not be so darn picky who we might choose to partner with..


We are not particularly picky. The perception of being picky is related to the plethora of choice in which we live in this particular part of the world in a relatively free society. If you happened to find yourself alone on a deserted island with a male, you would form a sexual relationship with him regardless of his particular qualities.

There is any amount of evidence to support this view. Just as you go about mating cats by putting a male and a female together, the human animal will behave the same given limited choice. Picky behaviour is not an aspect of humanity, its an aspect of the situation you find yourself in. While its certainly mitigated by other issues, both social and societal, sexual desire does proceed independently of those considerations.
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