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 AUTHOR
 ________
Joined: 12/24/2006
Msg: 26
I need an excuse to get out of it....Page 2 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
Didn't I see this as the plot line to a "B" movie made in the early in 1990's....? Maybe you could find it and rent it...?
 supernovastunnah
Joined: 4/26/2008
Msg: 27
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 7:44:35 PM
tell her asap so she can find a new date...i mean she is your ex u dont have to please her.
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 28
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I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 7:56:24 PM

To the ones that are posting insults towards me....You have never changed your mind about a situation and lied about it?


In this type of situation, no. I have bent the truth in order to spare someone's feelings but not in terms of backing out, begging off before anything is scheduled. You are merely making excuses for doing something that is wrong and what is funny is that this thread isn't even about what is right or wrong because you don't really care, you just don't want to face the music for what is clearly a choice.

You have already told her the truth so any lie you come up with unless she is a total moron, will be seen for the lie that it is. I also just checked your profile and this is what I don't get; you have kids, would you help your kids lie in a similar situation? Regardless of whether this woman is into herself, yada, yada, the fact remains that you made a commitment to something and you don't really have a good reason to break it as another real conflict of interest would be and missing a football game you forgot you want to watch is not a conflict that is impossible to get out of.

If a woman makes a date and gets a better offer the woman with class and compassion goes on the date she made first because it is the right thing to do. If she loses out, then that is the way things are. If a man asks a woman out and she says she is busy so he makes a date with another gal, and she comes back and says her plans canceled she can go, the man with character keeps the date with the second choice because it would be unkind to cancel on her at the last minute.

If your child commits to go to a birthday party and then gets an invitation to go to another party for a more popular kid if you help your child weasel out of the first commitment then you are just teaching your child fabulous values including ignoring how he/she would feel if another party did the same to him/her.

If you had to work instead of watching the game, you would work. If this person or the wedding were important to you you would get over missing the game. Taping it isn't the same, so what, you are like 12 and can't get over it? Since she didn't think you were serious, either tell her tomorrow that you are, that you are backing out or find her a date. Lying at this point isn't really an option unless, again, she is a moron.

And color me stupid, for the folks that think you need to grow a set, since when is trying NOT to hurt someone's feelings an illustration that someone is whipped? I thought that was just common courtesy which should be applauded considering the topic of this thread.
 bellazingara
Joined: 7/4/2007
Msg: 29
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I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 7:57:49 PM
Sorry OP but that is a LAME excuse for going back on your word. It's not like it's an emergency that you're cancelling for. You can always record the game and watch it later. While it may not be the same as watching it live at least you won't have a guilty conscience while watching it knowing you did the right thing.....you do have a conscience don't you? LOL This isn't something like a movie where you can take a rain cheque and see it with her another time....it's a special one time event that she had to RSVP for. At this stage, if she ends up having to go alone because she can't find someone else to go 13 days before the wedding, it'll likely be too late for her to cancel for the guest she was originally going to bring. If it's a sit down dinner, the bride and groom will still have to cover the cost of your plate.

Do the grown-up thing and go. Your word is the only thing you can give someone and keep at the same time.
 aSydneyMale
Joined: 5/16/2006
Msg: 30
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 8:03:58 PM

Several weeks back I got a text by an exgirlfriend who invited me to be her date to go to wedding on the Sunday Sept 14. The wedding starts 4pm and I agreed to go, but there is one problem. I am football fan and a huge fan of the New England Patriots, so I never miss a game. The Patriots play the Jets at 4 pm, and it's going to be a GOOD game. I totally forgot about the game when I said "yes", so I need an excuse to get out of it.

Can somebody give me a good excuse to get out of it? Pleeeeese!!!!

Why don't you just call her and tell her you forgot you were actually ten years old and not equipped emotionally to do grown-up things like attend adult functions, such as weddings?

It's September, not January, it's hardly the playoffs?

Tape the game and go to the wedding like a big boy would.

Now, run along now.
 SecretFormula09
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 31
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 8:09:44 PM
Providing you let her know soon, she will be able to invite someone else....It doesnt have to be a male...She could invite any of her friends to go with her....If she has rsvp'd for two, then yes, etiquette requires she bring another guest or re-rsvp to advise that only she is coming....I am curious as to why she wants to take you--her ex--to a wedding anyways...Unless she is trying to get back with you? We really dont know all of the circumstances here so this is just generalizing for me....I would think she just wants someone to accompany her and this shouldnt be a real heartbreaker for her...Interesting how many people see this as a serious issue of your word and how others see it as just a change of heart...Just goes to show how differently we all view situations...And I think it is irrelevant why you changed your mind but would you indeed be going if it werent for the game or was that just a convenient excuse for you? Seriously....Maybe you just dont want to go...And that is okay too
 CoolBreezez
Joined: 8/20/2006
Msg: 32
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I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 8:21:17 PM
(ever watch Ren and Stimpy)

YOU IDIOT!

What were you thinking!

I've put a call into the Bud Light Institute and yes they have a solution.

You need to call for a semi legal substitution. Find a Chargers , Giants or Miami guy and get him to go for you.

Ask him to inform the ex just before game time so she doesn't have to worry about it too long.

And under no circumstances tell her the truth. It's just too - boring.

And report back here at POF forums as to how things worked out.

I'm looking forward to it.
 wizardofossington
Joined: 6/17/2007
Msg: 33
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 8:32:06 PM
In this type of situation, no. I have bent the truth in order to spare someone's feelings but not in terms of backing out, begging off before anything is scheduled.


That's what I'm trying to do is bent the truth a little bit, no different from what you did. I'm not too sure why you need to discredit me, but maybe you've been lied to a lot that this topic is a little sensitive to you. I'm not too sure, so I won't ask....I apologize, but you don't even know me.


You have already told her the truth so any lie you come up with unless she is a total moron, will be seen for the lie that it is.


Well I guess I'm damned if I do, I'm damned if don't....


If you had to work instead of watching the game, you would work.


Hell no!!! And work already knows how I feel about football....

I was actually trying to have fun with this and nothing more. I understand you have concerns on how other people feel and I respect that. I really don't want to hurt her feelings and I don't think if I did made an excuse not to go that her feelings would be hurt. To be honest she can find another date with a snap of her fingers....I just was hoping someone could give me an idea, no big deal.


Interesting how many people see this as a serious issue of your word and how others see it as just a change of heart...Just goes to show how differently we all view situations...


I'm at odd with it too....Some people are more delicate than others. I guess perception is having it's role on this one. I'm alright with some of the abuse I have been receiving.
 Happily Ever...maybe
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 34
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I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 8:36:04 PM
Time to man up OP. And I don't mean being honest and telling her why you want to bail on her. You weren't under any obligation to accept her invitation, but you did. To back out and leave her hanging at the last minute is weak.

Look, I'm a huge Eagles fan myself, so I understand. But I know my team's schedule, so I wouldn't have accepted the invitation to begin with, knowing they were playing at that time, if the game was that important to me. Since its a Sunday wedding, I'm sure there will be lots of people interested in the game, so you'll be able to keep track of what the score is by going out to the bar at the reception. Worse case, you record the game on DVR/VCR and watch it later. As this point, she is counting on you, and since you accepted, you need to be a good guy and go with her.
 debindapeg
Joined: 8/28/2006
Msg: 35
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 8:39:36 PM
its an exgirlfriend,,,i know you said yes but football is mor eimportant to the guys :) she has tim eto find someone else
 Sweet J-me Baby
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 36
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 8:57:40 PM
This is a tough call here....It's two and a half weeks to the wedding...If it was a big baseball game and it was an old bf wanting to take me to a wedding at the same time, I would have a hard time deciding too.

If it was a wedding that I wasn't keen on going to in the first place, I would probably back out....giving him ample time to find another date.

you have a tough decision to make there, buddy!
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 37
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I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 9:09:03 PM
I don't think anyone has attacked you and no one is sensitive to the issue, just trying to point out that this is totally a right and wrong thing, not a can I get a good idea for weaseling out of this, and that blowing someone off because you don't want to do something or something better comes along is wrong, period.

Right and wrong are pretty clear as are putting yourself in someone else's shoes. The issue again, is not whether her feelings would actually be hurt because apparently she is not the greatest person on the planet but it is similar to recognizing that stealing is wrong. Is it any less a theft because you stole something inexpensive and/or didn't get caught?

You are talking essentially about common courtesy and whether you would like it if you asked someone to do something, say it is a guy friend and not even a woman, and they basically blow you off for something you think is stupid, like going to a craft show or staying home with a sick cat instead of assembling at the local pub for the game.

If she can get a date so easily then you should have just told her when she said 'you'd better go,' that seriously, you weren't, you will be in front of the television so she really needs to dig up a date. At this point, the whole thread is just trolling.
 ***piano4te***
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 38
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 9:18:29 PM
Weddings will come.....weddings will go...... they happen every damn weekend....and will for a very........very......looooooooooooooooooooooooooong time. Hell, she's probably going to be attending a few more before this year is even over......

But how many times are ya still going to get a chance to see Bret FAV-RE play??? HUH???

Just tell it to her like that......The TRUTH!!! if she can't understand the magnitude of this situation......then just tell her to piss off..........
 wizardofossington
Joined: 6/17/2007
Msg: 39
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 9:26:45 PM

But how many times are ya still going to get a chance to see Bret FAV-RE play??? HUH???


It is a special game, which a lot of people don't understand. I'm probably going to get a lot of grief on that one....I love football what can I say? It's not like I'm attending to my wedding and trying to cancel.

I'm still contemplating if I should go....Maybe I should ask if there is going to be a widescreen TV at the wedding....Yikes!!!!
 ***piano4te***
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 40
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 9:34:26 PM

It is a special game, which a lot of people don't understand. I'm probably going to get a lot of grief on that one....I love football what can I say? It's not like I'm attending to my wedding and trying to cancel.

I'm still contemplating if I should go....Maybe I should ask if there is going to be a widescreen TV at the wedding....Yikes!!!!


Of COURSE it's a special game, dammit!!!

And Bret Favre is still married to his woman...... I'll lay even odds that the couple getting married is going to be divorced in five years.....and the ex bride is going to be on POF immediately afterward, or perhaps while she's still separated......with a kid from this guy, who will probably, in all likelihood, be on here WHILE she's pregnant with said kid...which is why they're divorcing........and you'll SEE her on here.... (because, of course, he won't have a picture on HIS profile, so how are you going to see HIM...) And then you'll REALLY be pissed.....!!!

And yes, I DO know people who've brought tv's to a wedding when they didn't want to miss the BIG GAME... They don't exactly want to be out there doing the farickin' CHICKEN DANCE, THE MACARENA, or the ELECTRIC SLIDE!!! Which is probably what you're DATE is going to expect out of you.....and you probably won't even get laid afterward for humiliating yourself like that........

I'm just lookin' out for ya man!!!!
 anti-ipenema
Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 41
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/1/2008 11:49:42 PM
Hey Wizard! I won't fault you for loving the football but you DO know that weddings are great places to meet women?
Read your profile, noticed you are single...... beware my super mad paying- attention skills!
Unless the ex is one of those girls that goes nuts if you don't spend every nano-second paying attention to her (which you wouldn't be doing if you're going to the bar every 15 seconds to check the scores) how bout the ultimate compromise.....
go to the wedding and see if there are any cute women checking on the football game, even if it's with the opposing team, at least she still likes football....just a thought...
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 42
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/2/2008 12:54:20 AM
She's an ex. Tell her to find a real date.
 ***blue***
Joined: 4/21/2008
Msg: 43
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/2/2008 9:16:30 AM
Why not just record it? And if you didn't want to go in the first place you should have just said no.
 LeeAnne51
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 44
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/2/2008 9:33:19 AM
shes a ex gf its not like your gona lose her again just tell her something came up and you need to opt out of it, like it or not she will find someone else to go with her.
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 45
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I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/2/2008 11:28:59 AM

It's not about the girl being an ex. It's about the fact he made a committment. It wouldnt matter who it was........When you commit to something you should follow through. It speaks to your integrity.


I agree with this statement, pretty moon.

OP, the mature and honest thing to do, would be to tell her the truth. Tell her asap and let her know if she can't find someone else to go with, then you will honor your commitment. If she finds someone else, you're off the hook. JMO.




~ds~
 Happily Ever...maybe
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 46
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I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/2/2008 1:21:32 PM
^^^A gal after my own heart. I'm an Eagles and Phillies fan, but hate it when everyone tars the lot of us with the "Philly fans threw snowballs at Santa" BS brush. Isn't it time to let it go, 40 years after it happened!?

Have to agree with the people who pointed out that her being an ex GF makes no difference here; if he didn't want to go with her he should have said no when she asked, no harm no foul. But to bail out now, and with a weak excuse to boot, makes him something less than a gentleman.
 Diadora
Joined: 6/16/2008
Msg: 47
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I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/2/2008 1:28:01 PM
This is the opportunity to END the relationship with your ex now and forever.
Just call her back and tell her you were not joking. That you are bailing on the wedding because of the football game. Then hang up.

I really doubt she will every call you and ask you to do anything EVER again.
No woman wants to be second in line to something on TV.
 willowbunny
Joined: 7/20/2006
Msg: 48
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I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/2/2008 3:55:30 PM
Tell her the truth. She's your ex girlfriend and you shouldn't feel obliged to go. At least you'll have given her enough time to find someone else to go with.
 superbadzzz
Joined: 8/16/2008
Msg: 49
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/2/2008 4:33:45 PM
just be honest... tell her that you've become an international man of mystery.
 whothehellknows
Joined: 7/23/2006
Msg: 50
I need an excuse to get out of it....
Posted: 9/2/2008 4:43:48 PM

Can somebody give me a good excuse to get out of it? Pleeeeese!!!!


Tell her you value sports wayyyyyy ahead of her and let the chips fall where they may. Coming up with an excuse is just the cowardly. Let her know where she stands in the grand scheme of things so she can take whatever action she feels appropriate.
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