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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Is God a Good Dating Coach???      Home login  
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 mstrish1957
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 76
Is God a Good Dating Coach???Page 4 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
I think alot of people misunderstand what it means to turn it over to God. We are suppose to turn over to God the things we have reached a point where we can do nothing more. In other words the things we have no control over.
However, God gives us free will. It means just that. We have free will and that entails allowing each one of us to make the best decisions according to what God wants. I refuse to believe we should walk through this world so fragile we have God responsible for each single move we make.
When meeting a new interest we are, for most of us anyway, logical and free independant thinkers. When you meet someone you know what things blend best with your personality and values in life. If your life is one in synch with God you should be able to tell way ahead of time if this is a possible match. In other words, I believe God expects us to make our own decisions,
 musicianfriend
Joined: 7/23/2007
Msg: 77
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Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 9:54:13 AM
Hey Boise!! Whats up!!! Nice to hear from you again!: ='s a need for LOL
 musicianfriend
Joined: 7/23/2007
Msg: 78
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Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 9:55:35 AM
East:

people in abusive relationship?

Hmm...how did they get there? Didnt they CHOOSE to be there?

Its all about choice..No ones fault but their own.. sorry.

Perhaps you can tell your friend to read some books about co-dependency and boundaries...

We make our own beds then try to blame others...
 Thebeach10
Joined: 1/8/2008
Msg: 79
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 10:16:51 AM
God helps those who help themselves
 MY OH MY
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 80
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 10:26:38 AM

"I just put it in Gods hands..I dont want to worry about it anymore."

What she said is that she doesn't want to worry about it any more. She will give up her worrying about it, whether she states she is putting it in God's hands or no ones hands, it isn't horrible. She is done stressing about it. Nothing wrong with that.

Some things you do want to say, God helps those that help themselves, but this doesn't seem like a situation where she needs to or has to take any action. Not like she has an illness that she isn't going to the doctor to take care of, an unpaid bill, etc.

It is nice to give some worries up whether it be meditating, giving them up to God or a higher power, or just choosing not to let stress take over your life. Don't sweat the small stuff. Life is short, stress kills.
 virgilskid
Joined: 10/29/2006
Msg: 81
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Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 10:31:15 AM
I believe in God but not in using him as a crutch or a scapegoat. My first ex had a friend who would leave everything up to God, bills, jobs, boyfriends, whatever, never worried about anything. She went bankrupt and last I heard was in a disaster of a marriage. I do believe that the Lord helps those who helps themselves, not sure where that is from but I believe it. If something is entirely out of my hands, a sick loved one, natural disasters, someone is hurting and in need of comfort I can't give, I pray for them and leave it up to God. For things in my personal or professional life, I still pray but do what I can to cinch the deals or improve my odds. I seriously think God has better things to do than worry about my love life.
 musicianfriend
Joined: 7/23/2007
Msg: 82
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Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 10:33:38 AM
Soul:

Read a book called "The Shack" and maybe you will understand about all the starving and dying babies...

If the rulers of a nations were good and responsible men and women? Would those babies be starving? If the parents of those babies were responsible..would those babies be starving..Are the people of that land giving God his due so he would be with them? OR Are they independent thinkers going their own way? Perhaps the starvation of children is NOT DUE TO GOD. BUT DUE TO MANS INDEPENDENCE FROM GOD....Doing things his own way... ITS ALL ABOUT CHOICES...

Not Gods fault at all..

American was great when we were with God..But we are falling away...and so is our nation..

Does anyone see the writting on the wall. Do ANYONE have eyes to see what is going on?
 oldsoul
Joined: 3/10/2007
Msg: 83
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 10:42:11 AM

what about your RUDE AND DISRESPECTFUL comments about what I know to be true..my beliefs...



Why do you all have such a righteous attitude...as if anything you belive is true..


How can anyone claim that what they believe is TRUE but that what everyone else believes is NOT true and at the same time not see that by that very statement, they are the very picture of hypocrisy they accuse others of, is beyond me.


You see...alot of people on here are so hypocritical...they cant even see their own flaws.


Oh I agree ;)


IT WAS NOT AT ALL LIKE THIS IN SUCH MASS PROPORTIONS years ago when God and church dominated this country...


Fallacy. This is what's called building an argument on a fallacy which invalidates it. Contrary to popular beliefs, the world is a much better place today than it's ever been. It might appear to be in worse shape than before because we now have access to insta news and multi media outlets showing us the horrors of our world on our big screen TVs while we sit complacently on our overstuffed couches stuffing our overstuffed faces on over-processed crap we call food and suck back our distilled and sterilized and purified plasticised water, but the horrors have ALWAYS been there. We just couldn't SEE them before. We weren't aware of them.

But...NOT being aware of it doesn't mean horrors...great unspeakable horrors...weren't happening all over the place...some (many ?) in the very name of said god(s)!!!!

Sheesh...


A house divided CANNOT stand..Thus....we have all this confusion...


I believe and it is my opinion that religion is the major divider of people (or the house if you will ). And yes I agree...a house divided has no chance of standing. Too much confusion (and hatred, and I'm right you're wrong, and MY way is the ONLY way...etc...etc...)... again in my opinion.


How can one be moral when they have never seen it...or do not even know what that looks like..


Who are you (seriously and with all due respect) to claim to even know what I or any of us know or have seen or not? Christianity is NOT the bedrock of morality nor does it even come close to what I believe to be moral...again in my opinion and what is true for me.

So no OP...I don't think any decent god(s) worth their salt would CARE one iota about any of us "lonely hearts" sitting on a dating site when it seems to me that they would have so many other important things that they SHOULD be caring about.

I know that as I, a simple human being who follows the tenets of humanism, can barely take in the news on most days. My heart is weary and my shoulders feel very heavy and I'm often haunted for months by the images that run through my head from all the hurting and all the sorrows that I see daily on my screen. And there are days when it's all too much and I just don't want to be here anymore. Yet...I'm supposed to believe that a god who's better than me allows all this happen when I *a mere human being* can barely get out of bed some mornings from just thinking about it all?

Whatever. And to each their own.



JMHO

edit:
Soul: Read a book called "The Shack" and maybe you will understand about all the starving and dying babies...


Thanks for the suggestion but I am already VERY much aware of my world...(un)fortunately. May I suggest in return that you read The God Delusion or The Selfish Gene and see perhaps how we can really help those starving and dying babies?

Thanks:)



 We_Design_Our_Lives
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 84
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 11:17:40 AM
>> So let me ask you unbelievers.....what is YOUR solution to help these people...or do you even care about them?

Why wouldn't anyone care about others suffering? Isn't that a bit insulting to insinuate they don't care?

The solution is money....so why don't any organizations that collect money under the premise of a 'greater moral good' spend about 90% of the monies they collect toward eliminating disease, poverty, evil, in any incarnation?

What are the macro accomplishments of these organizations?
 TheDirtyBen
Joined: 8/25/2008
Msg: 85
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 1:00:11 PM
A faith w/o works is a dead faith.

your works are evidence of your faith.

God inspires and guides, He does not do all of the work for you!!!


I have a line from a Janis Joplin song running through my head as I write this.

"Oh Lord, won't you buy me....a Mercedes Benz...."
 Make it Paradise
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 86
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 1:04:09 PM
I believe God knows whats best for us, but he has given us free choice to figure it out for ourselves. As far as putting it in God's hands and not worrying about it, that is ok too because too much worry can ruin a relationship. But she still has to take some responsibility here and follow her heart/instincts and make her own decisions. Thats what He gave us free will for.
 shieldvulf
Joined: 10/30/2006
Msg: 87
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Is Good a God Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 1:26:03 PM
Thanks, O-Soul. You saved me from a mess o' typin'.

The voices tell me the voices are real.
The dreams mingle dreams and tomorrow.
If I challenge them, then would I still feel
the companions of air whom I borrow?

Wispfully,

Vulf
 claudiac123
Joined: 1/28/2006
Msg: 88
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Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 3:11:27 PM
I find that bringing God into my love life is not different than bringing Him into the rest of my life. If I want something, and find myself working toooooooooo hard to make it happen, it is my belief that God's hand is not in it - does it mean I can't make it happen? No but it doesn't seem to go as smoothly as I would like. If God's hand is in it, the entire endeavor (love, finance, work, friendship etc etc) is smooth and without a hitch a greater majority of the time. So, if I'm in a relationship and I find myself working very hard at it, something is wrong. I'm talking about communication, working out differences, and so on - I'm simply saying that the communication and working out of the differences is easier when there is Divine assistance.

edit: I confess that I have not read all the posts so if I missed something, forgive me, but I don't recall seeing any references to a dark side of life - forces that work in the opposite direction of lite - every ying has a yang - I AM responsible for my own decisions, but good wise counsel is recommended - I find that counsel and direction with those who walk closest to God.
 Kerry Corley Jr
Joined: 8/18/2008
Msg: 89
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 3:21:57 PM
Look OP, the reason I say no is because God has fucked me over so many times in the dating arena, that I've come to expect it,...& POF ain't helping much, either!

& to the people that use the 'God helps those who help themselves' quote....
the CORRECT quote is, "God helps the helpless." Look it up.
 claudiac123
Joined: 1/28/2006
Msg: 90
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Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 3:38:03 PM
Look OP, the reason I say no is because God has ****ed me over so many times in the dating arena, that I've come to expect it,...& POF ain't helping much, either!

Kerry every unfortunate relationship I ever got into was born out of my own loneliness and neediness - I have a tendency to put my trust in the wrong people, or make people who are not interested in me BE interested in me - that was not God, it was ME not listening.

Yes, God helps the helpless - when He's permitted to do so - I heard somewhere that God is a gentleman, He does not force Himself on anyone - I found that out for myself after plenty of falls, skinned knees and plenty of tears.
 real1foryou
Joined: 1/28/2008
Msg: 91
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Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 3:38:21 PM
Those being taught by the same coach are on the same page of the playbook. If you have a good playbook then you will have a great team. If you have a bad playbook then you will lose in life. The Godly principles are giving. And it takes the right other person who is on that same page.
Life is good.... if you pick well. The fault (if you have the right playbook) is in picking. Is your picker broken? Fix it.
Judge
 ColorsOutsideTheLines
Joined: 8/27/2008
Msg: 92
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 3:39:43 PM
"The people who have replied so far obviously aren't people of faith or otherwise they would understand what leaving it in Gods hands means"

Sorry, I forgot how to copy a quote.

God created the universe, so why could He not give you the proper instinct as to whether or not a person is right for you? We think with our hearts, not our heads when we are in love or lust and can be led astray by the very thing that makes us "feel" so good.

I have done this very thing, because I am in love and we sometimes are not on the same page(ld, it sucks, but we have no choice at this time), and I get frustrated. If this person is meant for me, it will work out. All of the hand wringing, heart wrenching, worrying, crying I could do is not going to change the facts. He is, or he isn't. Time will tell. I am believing that God will lead me in the right direction, and I must TRUST that still small voice the world calls your conscience. If you have faith, you can know that He will never leave you or forsake you. That doesn't mean you can make stupid mistakes and blame Him. It means that he gives you a brain, a heart and His helper. It is up to you to lean on him, or not.
 real1foryou
Joined: 1/28/2008
Msg: 93
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Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 3:45:23 PM
You can be

judgmental AND a lier

or you can be just judgmental.

Pick one.
Judge
biblically judgmental applies to damning someone to hell.
otherwise judge away and do not be unequally yoked.
 FishOwl
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 94
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 3:57:23 PM
"ask God to help guide her decision"

Like maybe with a psychological evaluation and, where applicable, a police report. Oh, and also notification of drug use. I really did drive a cab.

You might also ask him (her? By the way "her" is goddess) for someone perfect while you are at it. Might as well fantasize in a big way.

Oh, and I almost forgot world peace.

How about asking your god for a discerning mind and the ability to use it?
 Naughtical
Joined: 4/27/2007
Msg: 95
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 4:45:45 PM

Is God a Good Dating Coach???

Isn't he the same guy who got Adam and Eve together?
How's it working out for them...are they still hangin' out?

Shouldn't this silly question be in the religious forums?
 TheReason_
Joined: 9/19/2007
Msg: 96
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 6:40:44 PM
I know the last time I let God drive my car, he didn't do a very good job.




:(

 Green Eyes In Florida
Joined: 12/17/2007
Msg: 97
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Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 8:03:30 PM

Isn't he the same guy who got Adam and Eve together?


Naughtical: Your post brings up an interesting conversation that occurred the other day with my daughter; although it might divert the topic a bit from whether G-d is a good dating coach....but I would be interested in YOUR as well as anyone else's opinion..so please interject at anytime.

My daughter asked me, "If G-d created Adam and Eve, (Eve from Adam's rib, mind you), how did the human race continue to be "fruitful and multiply?"...

Hmmm...I thought...how? How do I tell her that when Adam and Eve created children that they must have been incestuous with one another to continue the human race.

I bowed my head with disdain and, basically, gave her a "I really don't know the answer to THAT ONE.....maybe you should google that for some responses."

What do you say to a very profound question like that? I'm really rather curious to hear some feedback and, what your take would be on this.

Meanwhile...as far as G-d being MY dating coach??? I haven't really inquired or even asked him more than a simple..."Where is he? Is he out there somewhere?" And, "When will we find one another???"

Thanks for replies.
~~Beth~~
 whenyer_strange
Joined: 4/10/2006
Msg: 98
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 8:50:47 PM
First, I'm an atheist and I think God is a bad dating coach, BUT I do think that prayer is the way to go. If a person was non-religious, I'd suggest meditation. Basically, I think that prayer like meditation ultimately reveals one's own heart to themselves. Those who pray would hear it as God calling them. Those who meditate would hear their inner selves. Sometimes, I'll even say church is good for a person, provided they pay attention and really think, focus, and dig deeper for answers. I believe some of the eastern religions teach that each person carries the light of divinity within them, and that is what one is to seek during mediation. I think what happens is we end up truly finding ourselves that way.

So, on that note OP, pray, pray a lot if you have to, and the answer will come.

Sort of off topic, I think those who claim God ever told them to harm another person for whatever reason is really revealing some very sick things within themselves, and a few are just downright evil.
 MY OH MY
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 99
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 9:25:17 PM

My daughter asked me, "If G-d created Adam and Eve, (Eve from Adam's rib, mind you), how did the human race continue to be "fruitful and multiply?"...must have been incestuous with one another

Adam and Eve's children were pure children and married each other because it was different back then. If she wants to know more because she understands more, have her read about Adam and Eve. Chances are you will get an "oh forget it."

There really are some risque stories in the Bible!
 winernotreally
Joined: 10/15/2007
Msg: 100
Is God a Good Dating Coach???
Posted: 9/7/2008 11:03:59 PM
Green Eyes...your post brought up this for me....

When my daughter was younger:

Me: 'God' is a spirit that lives inside all of us...blah, blah, blahdy, blah.

Her: No, 'God' is a guy.

Me: Why do you think 'God' is a man?

Her: 'Cause he's married and 'She' is a Goddess!


Me thinking: Well, of course!! Duh! Why didn't I think of that?
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