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 carribeanking7
Joined: 4/10/2005
Msg: 94
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new, Page 2 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
Dont be quick to judge someone you dont know.....and the background
it depends on the situation......a headache that lasts 3 months can be accepted...but one that lasts for 14 months can get the best of most any man..........especially if he remains faithfull (no its not an oxymoron-such men exist) during that period only to discover she was having an affair.................and she arrogantly admits it ......
Well were separated nearly a year now...and i feel pissed when people tell me its most likely my fault.......or assume that every marriage breakdown is because the MAN has been fooling around.


The person who started this thread at least deserved to be heard out..the reason he started this thread may have been grappling with his conscience...if he was truly pond scum..he would not have started this thread....he wouldnt need your opinion...he'd just go out and have an affair.
 carribeanking7
Joined: 4/10/2005
Msg: 119
Did you REALLY think that people here would condone this?
Posted: 6/20/2005 8:00:08 PM
Nobody condones adultery except for the small band of swingers...but the fact is that adulterers exist. My spouse was adulterous..so I know first hand how it feels...you forgive and try to move on for the sake of your own sanity but the hurt never seems to go away....
 carribeanking7
Joined: 4/10/2005
Msg: 120
Did you REALLY think that people here would condone this?
Posted: 6/20/2005 8:07:49 PM
@ the guy who started this thread - yr profile says youre single - congratulations..
youve just created more obstacles for genuine single guys who put up profiles here...
now every woman who has read this thread will be wondering if a profile she is viewing is genuine.
why didnt you sow your wild oats in your teens and twenties like most of the guys ?
 carribeanking7
Joined: 4/10/2005
Msg: 121
Did you REALLY think that people here would condone this?
Posted: 6/20/2005 8:07:54 PM
@ the guy who started this thread - yr profile says youre single - congratulations..
youve just created more obstacles for genuine single guys who put up profiles here...
now every woman who has read this thread will be wondering if a profile she is viewing is genuine.
why didnt you sow your wild oats in your teens and twenties like most of the guys ?
 carribeanking7
Joined: 4/10/2005
Msg: 122
Did you REALLY think that people here would condone this?
Posted: 6/20/2005 8:07:59 PM
@ the guy who started this thread - yr profile says youre single - congratulations..
youve just created more obstacles for genuine single guys who put up profiles here...
now every woman who has read this thread will be wondering if a profile she is viewing is genuine.
why didnt you sow your wild oats in your teens and twenties like most of the guys ?
 Riggity
Joined: 3/17/2004
Msg: 125
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 1/24/2006 12:06:00 PM
Terry, Darma:

Ever wonder why someone like Darma is so bitter? I'm also going to assume that you've never been through this sort of experience? Any man or woman who decides that the grass is greener on the other side is only cheating themselves and are obviously experiencing some sort of inner conflict with themselves. If this is the case, then split up - it's a lot easier to split because your not happy than it is because your significant other is cheating. Also, I have to agree with Terry that this sort of person is most definitely pond scum.

Have you ever noticed how soft a target cheaters are for manipulation? Do you know why?!? Because there unhappy with themselves and the world around them! These are also the same people who have difficulty seeing the word in color - they only see shades of grey. They have no feeling in them, and are almost unhuman-like. From what I've seen, they also have a very low self-esteem, are typically uneducated and walk with their heads down most of the time. It must suck to be like that.

I’m done here.


Riggity
 Synical
Joined: 8/16/2005
Msg: 134
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 2/4/2006 10:49:53 PM

Terry doesn't actually say that he is married and is looking to cheat. He's asking a question about assumptions. And the majority of you have assumed that he is married.


I only stopped to read the first page of replies. I saw a few people give him generic answers, not relating to him, and his response was to insult them, call them bitter and get defensive. He went on to complain that it's the womans fault it's happening, and other details. It definately sounds as if he's married ... I pity the wife.

Why get married if you believe that you're free to look even afterwards just because you're periodically unhappy? If that's your take on the subject, you should avoid marriage at all costs and save your future wife the trouble. To me, its fairly simple. You either leave and THEN find other women, or stay married and stay faithful.

By the way .. the woman isn't sensitive to his needs .... if the man is looking elsewhere, how sensitive is that to HER needs?
 Angel Eyes_Sassy Mouth
Joined: 10/11/2005
Msg: 135
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 2/5/2006 5:42:09 AM
Good reply Darma......I just had this guy on here whos 56 telling me his poor wife was in an accident several years ago and "can no longer enjoy the pleasures HE desires" looking to find someone who basically can take care of HIS needs!! Believe that one? What about HER needs?? If she can no longer have sex imagine what else the poor woman cant do!! BUT ..you know ...HE WONT LEAVE HER...because of her injuries!! Just CHEAT on her!! Men like him make me sick!! And YES .......I told him so.... I feel sorry for this woman...!!
 davidj980
Joined: 8/13/2005
Msg: 136
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 2/5/2006 6:21:24 AM
Darma,
There are many types of commitments people make, when married. Just because a married man is on this site looking to meet people does not mean he is not living up to his commitments. It also does not mean necessarily he wants to cheat. We live in a time when people are divided from one another; when men and women are have no other outlet to communicate. We are complex animals. It is naive to think a small group of people in our lives will completely fulfill all our needs for social interaction. The fact a man shares he is married instead of lying about it should be a good quality in a chatmate on a site like this. Please tell me what is worng with mature coorspondence between two adults?
 flyingv
Joined: 2/3/2006
Msg: 146
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 2/17/2006 1:57:07 PM
Im not trying to break your ball$ Terry but cheating isnt gender specific, men who cheat period i dont care what the reason are are jerkoffs and women who cheat are pigs

What bothers me is all the married attached folks on here and some of them attempt to justify why they stray PLEASE, do your self a favour which youve heard a million times and you will hear one more , if youre not happy either buy your self a happy meal or get a F*ckin divorce, heck go to Mexico i hear Divorces are cheaper if your frugal person.
 Engage-me
Joined: 11/2/2006
Msg: 151
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/2/2007 7:58:08 AM
OP you must not have done a thread search on this topic. Either that or you like getting publicly flogged. Maybe you need to look for a BDSM dating site.
 Engage-me
Joined: 11/2/2006
Msg: 154
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/2/2007 8:38:39 AM
SRed -- JC says that the law of Moses was given because of the wickedness of Israel, then goes on to say if any man looks upon a woman with lust in his heart he's already committed sin. .......
 rockondon
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 157
view profile
History
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/2/2007 10:46:15 AM
Before you go sneaking around on your significant other, imagine what you would feel like if she were sneaking around on you. If that would bother you then DONT DO IT.


SRedRose: Christians *shouldn't* divorce, according to Jesus' teachings

Christians have the highest divorce rate.

Divorce rates among conservative Christians were significantly higher than for other faith groups, and for Atheists and Agnostics.
http://www.religioustolerance.org/chr_dira.htm

Incidentally, most prisoners in the US are christians too - http://www.abarnett.demon.co.uk/atheism/crimechart.html
 rockondon
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 160
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History
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/2/2007 11:02:04 AM

Note, dearie, I said they SHOULDN'T divorce. SHOULD NOT doesn't mean DO NOT.

I agree. I just thought I'd post that anyway for those who may have certain preconceptions. Many seem to think that christians are of higher morals, more honest, less likely to divorce, less likely to commit crime, etc. Hope I didn't offend.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 163
So if a married (woman) isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/2/2007 12:27:53 PM
Can a nonbitter, nondivorced woman(widow) ask to turn the scenario around? Put the shoe on the other foot? Ask what if it's YOUR ox that's getting gored?
Understanding that this is all hypothetical, theoretical, rhetorical, and academic;

Woman is married but very unhappy. Is it OK for her to go out looking ( and this WOULD include sex test drives LOL)for a better husband, or failing that, at least someone(or an assortment of someones,whatever!)) to give her the emotional support and sexual satisfaction she's NOT getting from hubby? Of course while all this is going on she would of course live in same house and sleep in same bed as hubby, and probably relying on hubby's income(at least partly) for her quality of lifestyle and social standing??
Guys? Would it be OK for an unhappy married woman to do that? I mean after all, it's most likely HIS(hubby's) fault that she's unhappy. But why should she go thru all the turmoil and probably take a financial hit by going the divorce route, when she can just cruise the internet(or wherever) and line up a man (or men) to provide the satisfaction she's NOT getting from her husband, or maybe find someone that she could AFFORD to leave her husband for?

Let's just leave religion and morals and right and wrong out of the discussion, I want to know how these men would FEEL if their wives did exactly the same thing they are trying to justify doing...
Cindy O
 whatagirlwants07
Joined: 1/27/2007
Msg: 166
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/2/2007 12:58:07 PM
You're not an ***hole until you cheat on your wife.

How fair is it to another woman for you to be married? Theres no future in seeing a married man.
What type of man would want a woman that clearly has such low self esteeme or moral values she would date a married man?

Not honoring your vows says a lot about what type of person you are if you ask me.
 whatagirlwants07
Joined: 1/27/2007
Msg: 167
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/2/2007 3:19:07 PM
Two wrongs don't make a right..........if she was the one who ran off then you need to end it then move on.
 whatagirlwants07
Joined: 1/27/2007
Msg: 170
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/3/2007 10:14:55 AM
This guy is a basket case....I thought after a certian age people wouldn't be into so much drama.

So you say you're married but you're not and this is to attract beautiful women?.....sounds like an episode of Sinefeld....Didn't work for George either.

Lot's of misery in here ?....You're just disappointed all the beautiful women didn't fall at your feet with your little "I'm married and wanna cheat on my wife" charade..

Honesty isn't always pretty ya know.
 Engage-me
Joined: 11/2/2006
Msg: 172
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/3/2007 11:13:08 AM
Geez ladies. So many of you are so vehement that -- well, to quote Shakespeare, "Methinks she doth protest too much." As in 'I was the other woman but couldn't get him to leave his wife.'

I'm not accusing anyone, and I feel certain that the above is not applicable to the vast majority of women on this site.

I'm not defending the guy, either.

LADYC4 a voice of sanity. Your post is thoughtful and well written.

I have also been a victim of this in reverse. I wasn't happy about it, but I didn't go round ripping women a new one who felt tempted the same way.

If you have issues to deal with, get therapy, don't just vent your spleen on a social site. If you don't deal with the issues that are causing all this anger all the "good men" will give you a wide berth.
Guess it's my turn now.
 bulesky
Joined: 9/11/2006
Msg: 174
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/3/2007 11:37:06 AM
yes that is so right, but I have a question about woman who is married and she is not happy, what then? she is not an a**hold like men? so she is not whore then what? what I am trying to said is all same, when they are not happy, hey are not, committment, she she also, yet still married same man for years and still not happy? hum something to think about I thought.
 bulesky
Joined: 9/11/2006
Msg: 176
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/3/2007 11:43:51 AM
Terryph i agreed with you 100%, you tell them, yes go go, I know women same way, in fact there are more then men do, some women are real whore and they just go out look for a men even she is marrie and happy she said, yap right, get a life
 Engage-me
Joined: 11/2/2006
Msg: 178
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/3/2007 12:14:43 PM
^^^^ Someone nominate this lady for sainthood, she deserves it!!!!!
 whisper67520
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 179
view profile
History
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/3/2007 3:43:25 PM
I just view him as being WEAK.... he should deal with the problems at home, stand on his own two feel and not look for someone to help him through the problems......Doesn't make him much of a shining star in my perception...
 whatagirlwants07
Joined: 1/27/2007
Msg: 180
So if a married guy isn't happy and wants to meet somebody new,
Posted: 7/3/2007 4:58:28 PM
Did anyone read everything OP posted?

He said he wasn't married just pretending to be to attract beautiful women because a friend told him it would work.

So his post was just bait...When it didn't work he fessed up..

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