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Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!      Home login  
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 Macforty
Joined: 5/15/2008
Msg: 176
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!Page 8 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
Concerned parents and carers can also seek from their local police details of the background of friends, neighbours and relatives who have unsupervised access to their children.

Lets just hope you dont have a falling out with any of the above ............even though you wont be on the register malicious gossip is dangerous and mud sticks !!


As with the lottery ticket that has been mentioned .........."It could be you" !!
 Miss Grundy
Joined: 4/5/2008
Msg: 177
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/26/2008 4:01:02 PM

Yes I'm single, yes I have no children of my own. So that means I have no right to enter into a debate on a subject that does effect me? Should this law get implemented nation-wide I shall be one of the people getting "checked out" (I have no aversion to seeing single mothers, my last serious girlfriend was a single mother). Trust me when I say I have first hand experience of the damage an over protective parent can do to their child. Damage that will last well into adulthood.

See..suggesting that a person is being over-protective to me seems like you don't actually understand the complexities involved in rearing children and is also rather manipulative.

If a mother or father has a gut instinct that a person in their life is not going to have a good influence but instead a bad one on the children they brought into this world - you need to respect that and allow them the autonomy of being in control of their and their children's lives....and therefore it follows that they have the absolute right to ensure that whomsoever they choose to employ as childminders, invite in to their family home for dinner or tea or even to do some labouring or which school they attend or who they end up loving is actually ok.

If you have the experience of being the partner of a woman who has children then you surely must know how it is to win the trust of a family.

I'm sure it's crap being a man at times but I've also had to have police checks done on me because of the various jobs I've worked in and I had no problem with people showing that particular initiative to attempt to discover if I would be a good person to be around children.

I think it's silly to feel affronted by someone's need to ensure their family's safety....tells me you've got an enormous ego anyway.
 pmb00cs
Joined: 11/2/2007
Msg: 178
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/26/2008 4:29:56 PM

See..suggesting that a person is being over-protective to me seems like you don't actually understand the complexities involved in rearing children and is also rather manipulative.
I apologise for the comment about over-protective parents. I made my post without taking the time to properly consider my words. I was angry, and lashed out. My comments there don't really belong to this debate, and maybe I shall start a debate on the correct topic to raise the point I was alluding too. But I doubt it.
If you have the experience of being the partner of a woman who has children then you surely must know how it is to win the trust of a family.
I know how hard it is to gain that trust, I also know how important it is. Which is one of the reasons I feel this law is a very bad law. It takes away the need for the mother to judge for herself, and this will in turn lessen her ability to do so. Trust is too important to entrust to government!
I've also had to have police checks done on me because of the various jobs I've worked in and I had no problem with people showing that particular initiative to attempt to discover if I would be a good person to be around children.
I have had to apply for security clearance for my current job. This has no bearing on how trust worthy I am. My manager does not trust me any more than he did before I made the application. That is because he has got to know me by working with me. It is the people that do not know me higher up the management chain that trust me more because of this form I now possess. However I have little respect for those that trust a piece of paper more than they trust real human judgement. In my opinion it is the sort of person that says I need Security Clearance to fix a computer that causes the sort of problems that lead to the public believing that Laws like this serve any good purpose.
I think it's silly to feel affronted by someone's need to ensure their family's safety
I do not feel affronted by the need of a parent to protect their children. I feel affronted by the continuing trend for the general populace, and the government, to want to pry into stuff that is none of their business, and doing so in a way that errodes the ability of society at large, and individuals more specifically, to make proper, clear, and educated judgements of each other.
tells me you've got an enormous ego anyway.
I assure you that my ego is quite healthy, and possibly a little smaller than it ought to be, unlike my waistline.
 Miss Grundy
Joined: 4/5/2008
Msg: 179
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/26/2008 4:50:57 PM
hey fatty tum tums..

I will reply to this..the rest of your post was complete balderdash to me...


If you have the experience of being the partner of a woman who has children then you surely must know how it is to win the trust of a family.

I know how hard it is to gain that trust, I also know how important it is. Which is one of the reasons I feel this law is a very bad law. It takes away the need for the mother to judge for herself, and this will in turn lessen her ability to do so. Trust is too important to entrust to government!


That is complete bollix..totally and inerasably (is that an actually word ?) so.

I'm never going to be convinced ..as a parent that knowledge and the ability to access that knowledge is an example of a nanny government trying to disempower parents and encourage them to be dependant upon heresay from gossip mongerers..jesus christ..If you have a black mark against your name it's there for a reason..

next argument !!
 pmb00cs
Joined: 11/2/2007
Msg: 180
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/26/2008 5:07:21 PM

I'm never going to be convinced ..as a parent that knowledge and the ability to access that knowledge is an example of a nanny government trying to disempower parents
The government aren't trying to dis-empower parents, they are succeeding in dis-empowering everyone. Besides which data without context is meaningless, and although I very much doubt the data that will be presented to parents under this law will be devoid of all context I don't doubt that it will not be presented with the full and proper context that allows it to be fully useful.
and encourage them to be dependant upon heresay from gossip mongerers
They don't want you dependant on here say or gossip mongers, they want you dependant on them, failing that they want you dependant, what on is unimportant. No-one is easier to control than those that are dependant on someone or something outside their control, especially when you control what they are dependant on.
If you have a black mark against your name it's there for a reason..
Yes, it is there for a reason, and that reason is normally the obvious reason. But it isn't always the obvious reason. And so we get back to the distinction between data and information. Information is always useful, data rarely is. Information is data with the proper context. This law will present data as information. And the biggest problem here is that the two are almost indistinguishable.
 Miss Grundy
Joined: 4/5/2008
Msg: 181
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/26/2008 5:19:06 PM
proper knowledge and distinct information is the difference between making an idiot out of yourself and a possible joke of family loyalty and love.

The children come first..the feelings of single men are totally secondary in the greater scheme of things.and a man who is persistent upon being an accepted good person and all round good- guy should be treated with suspicion..
 AlmaM
Joined: 3/20/2008
Msg: 182
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/26/2008 5:19:17 PM
OK to avoid the rumors caused by the level of secrecy let's have the Megan's Law version and actually
name them all publicly, same as Megan's Law does, together with their postcodes ;)

No rumors then and the parents know who they are
 Macforty
Joined: 5/15/2008
Msg: 183
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/27/2008 3:19:16 AM

OK to avoid the rumors caused by the level of secrecy let's have the Megan's Law version and actually
name them all publicly, same as Megan's Law does, together with their postcodes ;)

Or another way would be to avoid those attracted to dramas who have kids under the age of 16 ....... Problem solved !!

 Keefys
Joined: 6/12/2008
Msg: 184
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/27/2008 3:23:05 AM

The children come first..the feelings of single men are totally secondary in the greater scheme of things.and a man who is persistent upon being an accepted good person and all round good- guy should be treated with suspicion..
Words fail me. Anybody who has that level of paranoia should seek medical assistance in my view.

OK to avoid the rumors caused by the level of secrecy let's have the Megan's Law version and actually name them all publicly, same as Megan's Law does, together with their postcodes ;)
Why? So that the Daily Mail reading chavs who beat up pediatricians can go and sort them out?

OK, so let's see how this would work in practice... Postcodes cover many houses, whole sides of streets. Let's say that an ordinary married guy was caught with kiddie pictures on his PC and is on the register. He's a young guy, lives just down the road from me with his wife and kids and has the same postcode as me. But I live alone, I'm the only single middle aged guy in the street. When the witch hunt begins and the chavs go looking for him who do you think it will be gets a brick through the window?

I have nothing at all to hide, but as an ordinary single guy I live in very real fear of the hysteria that surrounds this issue and the mentality of the people who support these measures.
 AlmaM
Joined: 3/20/2008
Msg: 185
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/27/2008 4:35:35 AM
Postcodes cover many houses, whole sides of streets. Let's say that an ordinary married guy was caught with kiddie pictures on his PC and is on the register. He's a young guy, lives just down the road from me with his wife and kids and has the same postcode as me. But I live alone, I'm the only single middle aged guy in the street. When the witch hunt begins and the chavs go looking for him who do you think it will be gets a brick through the window?


I am not sure who is being paranoid here???

Megans Law shows photos and age of the offenders so it is a slim chance someone would:

a) mix you up with him
b) attack you actually

* unless he really looks very similar to you ..

And checking up PCs here and there is a good thing IMO.. you never know you might bump into Mr Roger who groomed couple of the 14 year old on myspace.. as these people should be made aware of the consequents of their actions ..
 SIrLordington
Joined: 9/20/2008
Msg: 186
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Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/27/2008 7:47:48 AM
Don't you see how bad Megans Law is? Sure you could look up and find the photo and name of an ex offender but then what? What exactly would you do about it?

My guess is fire and pitchforks. Maybe not you but, but once the mob mentality strikes the beer swilling meatheads they'll be lynch mobs roaming our streets.

This isn't the answer, better rehabilitation and monitoring of offenders is. It's funny how far ahead of its time the Brass Eye Special was.

Tonight.... PAEDOGEDDON.
 Miss Grundy
Joined: 4/5/2008
Msg: 187
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/27/2008 8:18:00 PM


The children come first..the feelings of single men are totally secondary in the greater scheme of things.and a man who is persistent upon being an accepted good person and all round good- guy should be treated with suspicion..

Words fail me. Anybody who has that level of paranoia should seek medical assistance in my view.

..on a scale of 1 to 10 how would you rate my level of paranoia then..based on the part of my post you quoted.

Are you another one of those good guys who seek to harm no-one, never have done and are unblemished ?
 AitchEm
Joined: 7/5/2008
Msg: 188
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/28/2008 2:20:03 PM

OK to avoid the rumors caused by the level of secrecy let's have the Megan's Law version and actually name them all publicly, same as Megan's Law does, together with their postcodes


This from yesterdays Telegraph:

Sex offenders can 'live' at bus stop, park bench or in tree

A legal loophole which allows homeless sex offenders to roam free - 'living' at a bus stop, park bench or in a tree - has been branded "astonishing" by a senior judge.

By Charlotte Bailey
Last Updated: 12:41PM BST 26 Sep 2008

A glitch in the Sex Offenders Register states that paedophiles and rapists with no fixed abode can register their address as a bus stop, park bench or tree.

This means that many offenders can go unchecked and sometimes disappear altogether.

Judge Anthony Scott-Gall discovered the loophole on hearing a case in which a man went missing for nearly three years after failing to sign the Sex Offenders Register.

Serial sex offender Darren Hellowell appeared in Lewes Crown Court for breaching the terms of a suspended prison sentence.

When Judge Scott-Gall asked how police kept a track of people who had no fixed address, prosecutor Barbara Down replied: "Apparently it is perfectly acceptable to sign the register with a particular bus stop or public bench as your home address."

To which the judge replied: "Goodness me. That's quite astonishing."

A leading sexual abuse charity is now demanding that the rules be tightened to keep a proper track of offenders.

Yvonne Traynor, chief executive of the Rape and Sexual Abuse Support Centre UK, branded the Sex Offenders Register "a sham".

She said: "This is an absolutely ludicrous state of affairs. The Sex Offenders Register is nothing more than a sham.

"The whole idea is to keep track of where these potentially dangerous people are living.

"But if they can record their addresses as ridiculous things like 'a tree', it makes a mockery of the whole system. Something a bit more sensible must be put in place to protect our society."

Mappa, the organisation responsible for the Sex Offenders Register, confirmed that such unconventional addresses could be used.

A spokeman said: "Under the Sexual Offences Act 2003, registered sexual offenders must notify the police of their address or, if they are homeless, any place where they may be regularly found.

"The MAPPA authority monitors these cases to ensure that individuals can be regularly found at these locations. If they are not they will find themselves in breach of the Act and may be arrested and brought before court."


So, that'd work then...
 spiraldive
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 189
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/28/2008 3:09:26 PM
Although I can see the reason for doing such checks, protecting the children etc etc .... yeah.. all good & well in this paranoid-society where people can nolonger look one another in the eye, smile or say hello when passing in the street.

Todays society seems to geared towards people who want to have as many children as they possibly can, no matter what, to a point of OBSESSION. I know I am generalising here & I do apologize for *generalizing*, but I make no apologies for my statement. This is a society that I do not succumb to.

It is another example of todays cotton wool culture society & interfering do-gooders making the single-male out to be the evil bad guy again.

There was a park (can't remember where), where the council workers were told, by some beaurocrat to approach guys who were on their own & ask them to give a good reason for being there on their own. How about, "I am enjoying a walkin the park - dummy!"

As a clean living, free thinking, rational thinking, non pervert, if anyone was to do a paedo-check on me I would walk out of the door in digsust.

If two guys came up to me when I was enjoying a summer stroll in the park & asking what I was doing & why, I would ask them if they were both "dogging" or "cottaging" together...
 Moron73 *Has A Photo*
Joined: 9/25/2008
Msg: 190
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/28/2008 3:29:18 PM

As a clean living, free thinking, rational thinking, non pervert, if anyone was to do a paedo-check on me I would walk out of the door in digsust.

That would make you look suspect. Damned if you do....
 AlmaM
Joined: 3/20/2008
Msg: 191
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/28/2008 3:41:50 PM

if anyone was to do a paedo-check on me I would walk out of the door in digsust.


Let me tell you something: I dated many guys and never thought of any of them as a possible peado..and it would take a really really big thing to happen for me to even think that..

But there was ONE guy.. very manipulative was my impression of him.. I will never forget the shine in his eyes when he saw my child for the first time and the way he approached him.. I do not notice these things but this time something felt wrong and it definitely did feel wrong..

This was not in UK and I was not interested in a relationship and he met my child by a pure chance.. but I could feel something wrong..

If I was with this guy I would first monitor him closely and I would think 100 times before I made a check but if I really felt necessary I WOULD make a check.
 rev_guilliano
Joined: 4/17/2008
Msg: 192
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/28/2008 11:19:50 PM
I still want to know how the people supporting this law will feel when a bloke they are friends with is killed because they met a single mum, didn't get on, she then tells a friend in the pub (lying) that she did a "Sarah's law" check and he was a convicted abuser. This conversation being overheard, or the lie bieng repeated, WILL lead to deaths of innocent men. There are a LOT of women (and men) out there who are malicious and vindictive like this (certainly more than there are child abusers).
 AlmaM
Joined: 3/20/2008
Msg: 193
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 9/29/2008 6:10:27 AM

I still want to know how the people supporting this law will feel when a bloke they are friends with is killed because they met a single mum, didn't get on, she then tells a friend in the pub (lying) that she did a "Sarah's law" check and he was a convicted abuser. This conversation being overheard, or the lie bieng repeated, WILL lead to deaths of innocent men. There are a LOT of women (and men) out there who are malicious and vindictive like this (certainly more than there are child abusers).


This is as possible as an innocent child being killed because the mum did not know she was dating a child abuser.
 try1more
Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 194
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Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 10/6/2008 9:39:04 AM
ok lets set the scene.
it's a town there are a few mothers that have had checks on guys that turned up positive so of course they have steered clear of them.
one day a mother (doesn't have to be one who has had checks made) reports a missing child understandably she is very upset.
now i'll hand over to you to continue the story!
 try1more
Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 195
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Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 10/6/2008 10:08:08 AM
as far as misstaken identity is concerned.
i have been recognised? on 3 occasions that come to mind.
the first was by my mother. she told me that she saw a guy on the dock, she was on the ferry to bute (scottish island) that if she didn't know i was over 300 miles away she could have been convinced it was me!
the second i was on a train heading south in germany, a guy sat opposite me and started chatting like he knew me. it turned out i was the spitting image of someone he had worked with.
the third my wife (at the time) went to the doctors and saw someone she said looked dressed and acted like me.
two of them were no strangers to me the other one was no stranger to who he thought i was.
sh!t i hope the last one's not on the register! he's local!
 bizkit mixture
Joined: 10/1/2008
Msg: 196
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 10/9/2008 5:50:19 AM
i would be quite happy if i could get a police report saying that i have no convictions, say on a official card and then if a relationship started i could show it and then they are no worries
 Loose_end
Joined: 9/12/2006
Msg: 197
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Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 10/9/2008 6:42:04 AM

ok lets set the scene.
it's a town there are a few mothers that have had checks on guys that turned up positive so of course they have steered clear of them.
one day a mother (doesn't have to be one who has had checks made) reports a missing child understandably she is very upset.
now i'll hand over to you to continue the story!


And there's so many other possibilities to boot!

And Women are to be trusted with this information are they? Not that i'm saying Women cant keep secrets , but thats a heck of a secret to keep!

Keep them locked up, exterminate them, i'd go there before suggesting a scheme such as this
 AlmaM
Joined: 3/20/2008
Msg: 198
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 10/10/2008 3:48:56 AM

I agree totally with Loose_Ends


but it is too many of them to keep them locked up .. and the prisons are already full up.

this is why the government is coming with the solutions like this. It is cheaper for them.
 kent_lee
Joined: 8/31/2006
Msg: 199
Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 10/10/2008 4:02:58 AM
its hard to object to anything that protects children ..... but it saddens me that we live in a world where would even consider checking up on a potential partner incase he or she has a history of child abuse or whatever.

i used to take a camera when my son played football and take the odd photo ... until a manager of an opposing team objected, even when it was confirmed by my son walking off the pitch and getting his drink from me and our manager confming who i was and me telling him politely to fukc off unless he was going to tell every other person there to turn off their mobile phones as most of them will have a camera on them, he still objected because he was within his rights etc and once i got over my initial anger i could see his point of view ... .... but up until then it had never crossed my mind that anyone would object ....... and it is a sad state of affairs that the world we live in has a need to have such rules ....
 Loose_end
Joined: 9/12/2006
Msg: 200
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Sarah's Law Gives Mothers Right To Make 'Sex Checks' !!
Posted: 10/10/2008 4:20:25 AM

but it is too many of them to keep them locked up .. and the prisons are already full up.

this is why the government is coming with the solutions like this. It is cheaper for them.


I would never claim to know all the answers, neither do i know the 'golden' answer. But i do believe the answer of allowing single Mums access will create many more problems than it could ever hope to solve.

A rope, a beam, a chair.........Thats cheap enough, even adding in the expense of 'one last meal' But that opens a whole new can of worms, the death penalty, wrongful convictions etc

But then again, sometimes evidence is conclusive.

Interesting footnote, good to hear Dennis Nilson may be back on our streets this year! You want to ease the burden on the prisons, kill scum like him......
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