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Joined: 3/21/2008
Msg: 14
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What does he need me to do?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)

Would it be OK if I occasionally took his daughters out for an ice cream or to a movie? I'm not sure how much of this he has shared with them, but I do like those girls & want them to know I'm there for them to talk to also.

That's a question to ask HIM.
My daughter (who no longer lives at home) was not informed of my illness until it was necessary, and I had all the information I needed to tell her. Particularly in the realm of prognosis.

Unless you are already actively involved in their lives, that could be a VERY sticky wicket.
But if you are, its probably one of the nicest gestures available.
Joined: 10/30/2005
Msg: 16
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What does he need me to do?
Posted: 9/23/2008 2:13:05 PM
Sometimes those going through serious types of illness will shut down and close people out for a lot of reasons. One of those reasons may be he wants to protect you from witnessing the horror before him. He may also need to be alone at this time for a short while to sort things out.

If I were you I'd let him know exactly how I feel about him and that you're not running away because of any diagnosis he may receive. In fact, you'd like to share this time with him and remain close. Let him know that you understand his need to be alone too and don't want to intrude on any personal level of growth he may be going through and that you're there waiting patiently for him to open the door and let you in if and when he's ready to.

If he doesn't respond, don't push. Allow him the time he needs with a reminder here and there that you're thinking of him, really care about him, hope he's all right, and would love to hear from him.

Other than that............pray!
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