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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 pansatyros
Joined: 3/24/2006
Msg: 186
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?Page 6 of 14    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)

Hmmm, why not... if he would keep his other private life out of our private life. Sex is not only thing people share in their relationship... so if e.g. friendship chemistry would be extraordinaly strong, why not... wouldn't that be just accepting the other person as he is?


Does that mean that...errrrrr...if your man has a keen interest in...errrrrr...blondes...he is allowed to develop a strong...errrrr...friendship with them?

I would not mind at all, let me stress this at all if my girlfriend(s?) wanted to experiment with...errrrr...other women...curiocity is a potent aphrodisiac...


I obviously was ready to let my imaginary bi-man to have his male affairs and not consider them as a threat to myself :p Well, well, you live and learn new things about yourself!


(muttering to myself: she is alive!!! alive!!! alive!!!)
 Fly on the Wall
Joined: 8/21/2006
Msg: 188
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/12/2006 11:42:11 PM
Reading this forum has made me twitch. OF COURSE I would marry a bisexual man, if he asked me to marry him, then OBVIOUSLY it's because he loves ME, and only wants ME.

Being bisexual simply means a person has the capacity to love regardless of gender. There is an issue here presented by extremely misunderstanding heterosexuals thats driving me insane:


NO WAY!! No time for His identity crisis for me!!


It's not an identity crisis, it does NOT mean they don't know their preference and certainly does NOT mean they are confused. Bisexual people are NOT confused about their sexuality, they simply do not let gender decide who they are limited to loving.

A bisexual isn't going to marry someone of the opposite gender and a few years down the road decide they want to have someone of the same sex and leave you. This opinion seems to be completely driven by a heterosexual's fear of being dumped. It is just as likely for a man to get dumped by his heterosexual wife because she wants to be with the hot young pool-boy. In both cases it means one thing: YOUR PARTNER DOES NOT LOVE YOU. It happens sometimes in marriages for various reasons that have NOTHING to do with the partner being bisexual....unless of course their husband/wife is overly paranoid about the issue to the point that it causes friction within the relationship.

If a bisexual marries you in the first place, it means they LOVE YOU, and want to be with YOU. Talking about them not knowing their preference....well, if they choose to marry YOU, obviously the preference is for YOU. Talk about insecurities.

The only people who are 'confused' or don't know their sexual orientation are those that say they want to experiment, you experiment when you are unsure of something, this is not the case with actual bisexuals.

Therefore I personally think that for all those that say they wouldn't marry a bisexual....it's simply because they REALLY don't understand a thing about it, and have fear and insecurites. I read a lot of 'I dated a bisexual before, NEVER AGAIN'......so people are stereotyping now...thats just as bad as saying 'I dated someone of *this* ethnic group before, NEVER AGAIN'

I don't mean to sound like a total B*tch, but I really feel sorry for those who are too closeminded to even date someone thats bisexual, you could be missing out on the greatest relationship with a great person, all because of your misunderstanding of them, and not realizing that dating a bisexual, from the point that they decide they like YOU is that same as dating someone who is heterosexual.
 tmofedm1
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 190
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/12/2006 11:58:32 PM
Totally not....I expect monogamy, be it abstaining from other women or from other men.
 Fly on the Wall
Joined: 8/21/2006
Msg: 191
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 12:29:00 AM

Has ZERO to do with being closeminded, at least for me - I prefer my partner "putts from one side of the green only" - that's called a PREFERENCE.


But if his preference is you, then what does it matter if he dated a man in the past? The past is the past, and if a man currently had feelings for you....I don't see how him being bisexual should matter as long as his eyes are on you. :P




Totally not....I expect monogamy, be it abstaining from other women or from other men.



......


Bisexuals ARE JUST AS MONOGAMOUS AS HETEROSEXUALS. Within both orientations you can find individuals who aren't monogamous....you shouldn't be generalizing this trait that some people REGARDLESS of orientation have, to one orientation. A heterosexual is just as likely to cheat on you as a bisexual, there is NO DIFFERENCE.
 julietjuliet
Joined: 7/3/2006
Msg: 192
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 12:34:30 AM
OP: You can you pencil me in as a 'NO' on this one thanks. I'm just not into 'triangles'.
 Fly on the Wall
Joined: 8/21/2006
Msg: 194
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 7:27:03 AM

Leara - If you READ the original post - the question was "would you with someone that IS STILL BI.. as in present, not past. So my answer remains, HELL NO!


Ok...I'm not aiming this response at you ^^^^^^ Going back it seems a lot of people are confused by this too. So this is in general of people being 'still bi'

this seems to be something else people are confused about. If your orientation is bisexual...it wil always be bisexual, you dont become heterosexual when you are with someone of the opposite sex, people won'[t ever change a bisexual person's orientation....BUT is does not mean they *crave* to be sexually active with people of both genders, it doesn't change the fact that if someone is bisexual and is with you...it's because they chose to be with you becuase they care about you, and not someone of the same sex....I really don't get why people aren't understanding this...if they have been in a relationship with a bisexual that dumped them saying they wanted to be with someone of the same sex, *gasp* it means they didn't love them to begin with. It's the same with a heterosexual couple, if your partner loves you theres no worry, because you trust each other, but if they don't love you, even if their heterosexual, they'll still run off and cheat. It's the same in heterosexual and bisexual relationships, there needs to be trust and love. God, if people are worried about a bisexual partner cheating on them, the bisexual can just as easily cheat with someone of the opposite sex. It really seems to me that people's fear of bisexuals in a relationship is groundless.
 good_eat
Joined: 7/8/2006
Msg: 195
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 7:33:29 AM
A bisexual woman is my preference.
 grey shado
Joined: 8/13/2006
Msg: 197
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 9:27:23 AM
actually being bi for over 25yrs i think i can address this..the answer is yes

one other said that bi's can luv tis tru

its just that as a bi and knowing many of like mind its about the other

individual not waht gender they are.

if a bi ladi or male asked me it would only depend on how i felt about them not what preference they have.
 firstladyiam
Joined: 3/28/2006
Msg: 198
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 9:28:34 AM
I'm with you, lonertx63 - I'd say "bye" as well............................
 t-gurl
Joined: 9/9/2006
Msg: 200
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 3:52:56 PM
Well, looks like I came into this at the end but who cares? The funny thing is that both of the major posters on this page (or the last page if I didn't count right) are correct and actually arguing the same thing.

First off, it's been said many times in this thread but I'll say it again. Straight, bi, gay and lesbians can ALL be monogamous. Just as they can ALL be promiscuous and cheat. So there is no point in thinking that a bisexual is going to automatically look outside the marriage. Just as there is no point in thinking that a heterosexual is automatically going to be faithful.

Completekaos stated her preference. And that's fine for her. She can marry whoever she wants.
Gay men are not considered closeminded for not wanting to marry a woman
Lesbians are not considered closeminded for not wanting to marry a man
Straight people are not considered closeminded for not wanting to marry the same sex

Closemindedness comes into play in not allowing others to make their own choices or for berating them or humiliating them for those choices.
 AgelessWonder
Joined: 4/12/2006
Msg: 201
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 4:11:58 PM
The only thing I would see if you are bi, you have a bigger pond to if you do decide to cheat!!
 -=Kalidor=-
Joined: 7/14/2006
Msg: 202
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 4:23:40 PM

Ok...I'm not aiming this response at you ^^^^^^ Going back it seems a lot of people are confused by this too. So this is in general of people being 'still bi'

this seems to be something else people are confused about. If your orientation is bisexual...it wil always be bisexual, you dont become heterosexual when you are with someone of the opposite sex, people won'[t ever change a bisexual person's orientation....BUT is does not mean they *crave* to be sexually active with people of both genders, it doesn't change the fact that if someone is bisexual and is with you...it's because they chose to be with you becuase they care about you, and not someone of the same sex....I really don't get why people aren't understanding this...if they have been in a relationship with a bisexual that dumped them saying they wanted to be with someone of the same sex, *gasp* it means they didn't love them to begin with. It's the same with a heterosexual couple, if your partner loves you theres no worry, because you trust each other, but if they don't love you, even if their heterosexual, they'll still run off and cheat. It's the same in heterosexual and bisexual relationships, there needs to be trust and love. God, if people are worried about a bisexual partner cheating on them, the bisexual can just as easily cheat with someone of the opposite sex. It really seems to me that people's fear of bisexuals in a relationship is groundless.


Yeah... its like saying "I won't date anyone who's straight because I want to be the only man she loves and if she's still attracted to men while being with me then THAT IS A BIG FAT NO"

Its mostly just lack of proper information and ignorance that causes these kneejerk reactions i think.

I also think that the younger crowd isn't as likely to be caught up in it as the older ones, unless they are just from some super opressive religious background.

I'm pretty sure every girl I've dated except 1 has been bi-sexual.. hell, I just assumed all girls were ;)
 Danp_13
Joined: 9/5/2006
Msg: 203
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 4:35:25 PM
BAHAH ! if she has bisexual girfriends SURE!
 Timbucktwo_
Joined: 1/29/2006
Msg: 204
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 4:39:36 PM
I like chocolate cake.
 Fly on the Wall
Joined: 8/21/2006
Msg: 205
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 4:42:57 PM

Msg 202,
I don't believe you can speak for the bi-sexuals.



...As a bisexual, I sure as hell can speak for them, thank you very much.
 tryintodulc
Joined: 9/4/2006
Msg: 206
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 4:51:25 PM
I probably wouldn't.....

I had some sort of weird dating thing with a bi-woman one time. As we were eating out, she pointed to one of the waitresses and said, "ya see, that's the sort of type I'd go for" and blah blah blah on the why of it all.

And I'm sitting there thinking...."what?".

Good thing it was still dutch.
 MJ50273
Joined: 7/19/2006
Msg: 207
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 5:01:33 PM
That's a good and tough question. I guess it would depend on the woman and the relationship. I won't say absolutely not, nor will I say certainly.
 t-gurl
Joined: 9/9/2006
Msg: 208
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 5:03:08 PM
^^^^^^ and that right there is the perfect answer
 zentral
Joined: 10/30/2005
Msg: 209
view profile
History
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 5:16:41 PM
As the above posters said - it would depend. With any relationship, it depends, doesn't it?

A dear friend of ours married a bisexual woman. She's a wonderful person, and they have a great relationship. I believe she's given up her other interests to be with him, but I don't know for sure. I wouldn't have any problem with it myself, if there were clear boundaries that we could both agree to and respect, and in all other respects the relationship was good.
 -=Kalidor=-
Joined: 7/14/2006
Msg: 210
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 5:44:15 PM
Leara.. I was gonna message you but you defeated me with age restrictions!
 Fly on the Wall
Joined: 8/21/2006
Msg: 211
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 9/13/2006 5:47:15 PM
If theres something you need to msg me about I'll remove it for a while. lol
 interorl7
Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 212
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 8/6/2007 1:24:44 AM
BraZen, Synical, JasmineKai, questing41, AgelessWonder, you guys get it and are right on the money….some of these others, well they will never get the fact that

Cheater = cheater (ORIENTATION DOES NOT MATTER, WAKE UP)

If the nature of your relationship is defined by the traditional ‘marriage’ than you are taking a ‘vow’ to be with no one other than your spouse. You will be attracted to others, your spouse will be attracted to others, but because you both took this ‘vow’ you will not ‘act’ on that ‘attraction’.

This is exactly what a ‘bisexual’ person does as well. No difference, single, bi, whatever…if you honor your ‘vow’ you are NOT a CHEATER, therefore, your sexual orientation means nada.

But there is hope, heyitsdoug finally figured it out….


As most of you have stated, “Bisexuals ARE JUST AS MONOGAMOUS AS HETEROSEXUALS. Within both orientations you can find individuals who aren't monogamous” nuff said.


I stick with my earlier post....
 thats true
Joined: 12/19/2006
Msg: 213
view profile
History
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 8/6/2007 1:40:49 AM
alot of people who are bi are actually gay/homosexual and being hetero is a second best option, so no I wouldn't intentionally. As well I have met homosexual people who justify their status by hating the other sex, so I would have a serious concern the person might hate me becuase of my sex. As well, there is the flavour of the month attitude that some bi's have and I would be concerned when their homosexual light turns back on, and that goes against the whole concept of an ltr.
 Dog Mommy
Joined: 7/11/2005
Msg: 214
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 8/6/2007 5:01:40 AM
no...I would not...I believe these men are a stones throw from admitting they are gay
 interorl7
Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 216
Would you marry a bisexual woman/man?
Posted: 8/6/2007 9:21:56 PM
"as for any concerns about polyamory or partner-sharing...heck that happens in straight relationships too. if that's what both people want and are open to, then bisexuality just adds a slightly broader scope to the arrangement."


I couldn't agree with you more.

These people that practice 'serial' monogamy are in essence doing exactly what bisexual female and bisexual males do. No difference.

Worse than that is anyone who 'has to be married' to have sex and has been married more than three times because of that 'moral' choice, ...grow up! (let the flames begin...! lol)

Perhaps if you had lived with a couple of them, you would only have been married 'twice' and still married to the second one to this day! Something I wish more would 'think' about.
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