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 Bregalad
Joined: 8/5/2008
Msg: 37
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In CollegePage 2 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
There are quite a lot of scholarships available, especially for one with very high grades. There are scholarships and grants on the federal, state, and often community level.

If you have a relatively low income your daughter can apply for a pell grant.

My daughter has several different scholarships. Here in GA the Hope scholaships are available to anyone who maintains a B or better average.

She has at least one other that requires a 3.5 GPA and at least 30 credit hours /year in your major.

The local phone company provides one year partial scholarships to quite a few H.S. grads.

There was a memorial scholarship in honor of a local police officer slain in the line of duty. In H.S. my daughter worked in the office. One day one of the school staff came up to her and said: "Fill this out. Today is the deadline & no one has applied".

The Methodist church gives a yearly scholarship to almost any member who applies. I believe other religious groups do the same thing.

A local cooperative church group runs a recycle store and gives a number of scholarships every year.

If she pokes around on the internet and asks guidance counselors etc. She will probably come up with most or all of the money she needs to pay for college. After that discipline is the key. Here in GA half the college freshmen who have a Hope scholarship fail to maintain a 3.0 average and lose their scholarship after the first semester. Those who do well ... 3.5 to 4.0 GPA find there are more scholarships available.

It also helps if she chooses a state school. The small, highly regarded state college my daughter attends cost about 10% of what a big name school would cost. Her department does a lot of collaborative work with some of those big $$$ schools. You can go to a small state school and suplement your resume doing summer internships or research with a big school.

I hope it helps.
 Bregalad
Joined: 8/5/2008
Msg: 38
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/25/2008 7:27:57 AM
There are quite a lot of scholarships available, especially for one with very high grades. There are scholarships and grants on the federal, state, and often community level.

If you have a relatively low income your daughter can apply for a pell grant.

My daughter has several different scholarships. Here in GA the Hope scholaships are available to anyone who maintains a B or better average.

She has at least one other that requires a 3.5 GPA and at least 30 credit hours /year in your major.

The local phone company provides one year partial scholarships to quite a few H.S. grads.

There was a memorial scholarship in honor of a local police officer slain in the line of duty. In H.S. my daughter worked in the office. One day one of the school staff came up to her and said: "Fill this out. Today is the deadline & no one has applied".

The Methodist church gives a yearly scholarship to almost any member who applies. I believe other religious groups do the same thing.

A local cooperative church group runs a recycle store and gives a number of scholarships every year.

If she pokes around on the internet and asks guidance counselors etc. She will probably come up with most or all of the money she needs to pay for college. After that discipline is the key. Here in GA half the college freshmen who have a Hope scholarship fail to maintain a 3.0 average and lose their scholarship after the first semester. Those who do well ... 3.5 to 4.0 GPA find there are more scholarships available.

It also helps if she chooses a state school. The small, highly regarded state college my daughter attends cost about 10% of what a big name school would cost. Her department does a lot of collaborative work with some of those big $$$ schools. You can go to a small state school and suplement your resume doing summer internships or research with a big school.

I hope it helps.

BTW The issue of getting your ex to pay will be a sate to state issue. It may also be easier to get a court to say he should pay than to extract the money.
 dead account
Joined: 4/13/2007
Msg: 39
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/25/2008 8:10:05 AM
Ooooooooooooooh this is so wrong on so many levels... it makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck. Has NO ONE even noticed that she commented that "SHE" was going to be inconvenienced by losing $200, that "SHE" wanted the money and how "SHE" would benefit.




Do you think there is a chance that I could be awarded with continued child support until my daughter graduates from college or drops below full time. This would help us so much?


No where in her post does it state that she wanted the money for her daughter..!!!

I faced a simular situation a couple yrs ago after the courts had told me to stop (they made it very clear to me early I did what they told me, no more, no less)... in fact they actually refunded the last payment back to me.

I asked her if my daughter would get the money 3 times and NEVER give me a straight answer... She wanted the money, plain and simple and she was going to use my daughter as a pawn like she has for the last 16 years.

I will tell you as God as my witness, She went so far as to lie to the child support agency in her state to get more support, to the point that what I had actually paid, was what they tried to tell me I owed... After almost a year and with the help of the District Attorney in my home town, it came to light that not only did I pay on time and in full, that I had over paid and I didn't owe anything... they all went running back under the rock they came out from under like****oaches once it was discovered that they owed me for over payment.

I have no problem if the child gets the money... I'm all for that and the Daughter should approach her father. If she cannot be adult enough to do this, than she had better get herself a part time job... we are only talking about $200 a month right ?

I'm sorry, but I don't buy this crap a single bit. The gravy train is beginning to dry up and OP is trying to figure out a way to keep the money flowing for "HER"... not for her daughter.

OP, you should be ashamed of yourself....
 GrandmaBooBoo
Joined: 12/30/2006
Msg: 41
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How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/25/2008 9:49:04 AM
This person lacks the courage to actually post in the forum but does enjoy sending nasty email so I thought I would share with those of you who have an interest in this topic what the cowards have to say:

The OP asked for legal advice on how to get child support for a child over the age of 18 who is going to college. That is a technical legal question and one that the responses I saw where bad advice. The exception were those who suggested she consult an attorney. Contrary to what the un-informed majority stated some states allow a parent to ask the court to continue child support until such time that the emancipated child has completed its college education. Ordering such continuing child support is purely within the discretion of the court. The child once it has attained the age of 18 does not have the right, in any state, to sue the parents for college costs. Your response was typical of some of the misguided people who express opinions about things they know absolutely nothing about.I consider it the worsts response and not relevant to the question asked.


MY RESPONSE to that email:


Well, as uninformed as I may be on the laws of individual states and countries, I DO know that 18 IS the "age of consent" in THIS country. 18 IS the age at which a child no longer needs parental consent for marriage, to drop out of high school (if his 18th birthday comes before graduation), 18 IS the age when a child needs NO parental consent to become a stripper at a topless bar. 18 IS the age at which a "child" needs no parental consent to leave the "home" and join a cult. At age 18, needs no parental consent to have an abortion; at age 18 is actually tried in an "Adult" court and has "adult" penalties enforced if they commit a crime.

MY forum post offered NO legal "advise", nor have I ever attempted to pass myself off as an attorney. What I DID say to the question asked in the forum....which you believe is "nor relevant" is that I "ABSOLUTELY HOPE NOT!" I stand by that declaration. I also firmly believe that such legislation WILL open the door to law suits by those who believe as you do, that "birth" is equavalent to a LIFETIME of entitlement...WITHOUT limits, controls, or AUTHORITY.

It is quite typical of the thinking in this day and age to separate the "control" from the "responsibility". It's quite a nice arrangement for those who are in "control"....particularly since they have no burden of "responsibility".
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 44
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How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/25/2008 3:19:13 PM
Uh, no. I know men who have been in court and had further payments required to support the child's college education. While a normal nuclear family, the father and mother have no obligation to the child after it is of legal age, once the divorce courts are involved, they tend to stay involved. If the dad is employed, very often he is expected to kick in something towards the kid's higher education. If he isn't willing to do so voluntarily, see a lawyer. There's always a shark lurking around, looking to make some money off of a marital split. But I think the legal responsibility ends once the kid reaches the four years post high school. If the kid hasn't managed to make something of him or her self by then, the dad's off the hook.
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 45
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/25/2008 4:26:30 PM

It is obvious to me...that the OP has made a huge contribution towards getting her child to the point she is at...and it is also obvious to me that she continues to make sacrifices for her children..I think that alot of these posts are not only arrogant...they are also offensive and demeaning to single parent's in general.


Come on, Liz. The only reason it's obvious to you is that you believe that men should pay for you and all women no matter what the circumstances are.

So many women complain about how some men want women to be bare-foot, pregnant and in the kitchen, but fail to see that so many women like you would only like to see men gum-booted, shovel in hand, slaving away to support you and your ilk.

Give it a break.

The laws around having to support kids until they are out of school is pretty goofy when you consider that if the parents stay together, there is NO such legal obligation.


 SweetnessInFlorida
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 48
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/26/2008 4:58:33 AM
Im one who has no patience for parents who do not contribute to their children, but the key word is children.
Once 18, they are no longer children, and his legal responsibility stops. if he wants to contribute as a loving parent wanting the best for his adult child, that would be great, but we all know the world isnt perfect.
I personally would do everything i could to help my kids through college when they get that age, but thats just me, it is not required. If he is not in arrearage then he has no obligation to pay support at this time.


Try scholarships or have her seek employment.
 SweetnessInFlorida
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 49
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/26/2008 5:05:41 AM
Child support until the age of 22? WTF?
Child support is for CHILDREN. At age 22 i was raising a little girl, taking physical therapy courses to get a good job in healthcare, and busting my bottom as a waitress and bartender to pay for it all.
and i could have been getting child support from MY father the whole time, nobody told me this??????????!!!!!!!!

Seriously, again, child support is for children.
how on earth do you pay CHILD support to an ADULT
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 52
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/26/2008 7:57:24 AM

Seems to me that some of you guys need to get down from those crosses your perched on....because the good lord knows....there is a child that probably needs the wood to make a fire...just so they can keep warm!!!!




I love it when you mix your imagery. I never makes sense, but it's always a reliable source of humour.


Hey capitano....hang on to that preverbial shovel...I think it may come in handy!!!


I ain't gettin' into any relationship with you or anyone with your attitude, so the shovel won't be necessary, thanks. I feel for the other guys out there, though.


Perhaps the OP is just trying to give her child the best head start...


And, good on her. The problem, though, is that too often people expect someone else to pay rather than look at how they can make it happen themselves. Post secondary education isn't a right. Access is, but there's no right to have someone else pay for it.

I have RESP's for my kids. I've been paying into them since they were born. The ex pays nothing into them. I do it because I don't expect anyone else to do it, even my ex.



 GrandmaBooBoo
Joined: 12/30/2006
Msg: 54
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How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/26/2008 9:11:42 AM
Yeah, can you just imagine.....already we have 5 yr olds telling parents; "if you spank me, I'll have you arrested!" What's to stop the little darlings now from creating so many problems that Mom and Dad get divorced just so they don't have to be bothered with work programs and filling out grant/loan applications? Far fetched? Sure...but then that's what we said about a LOT of things 30 years ago that are TODAY.....LAW.
 prof48
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 56
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/26/2008 6:43:15 PM

So then tell me liz should we have legislation that requires all parents married or divorced to pay for their childs secondary education? I mean come on on everyone or no one liz.

I'm afraid I have to differ on this one. If the couple is together still, they are making a joint decision regarding their offspring and their investments. Once a couple splits, like it or not, the courts become a third party to those decision processes. The children are a part of the divorce. The state has a further interest in insuring that the children make the best of things. I wish I knew the state of affairs for Australia. My daughter may finish college in her 18th year, but it would be hard without the little support her mother provides. As it is while she makes more than me, she seems to be able to hide enough so that her taxes show her making less than half what I do. Unfortunately the cost of enforcing child support tends to be greater than the benefits in obtaining it.
 dead account
Joined: 4/13/2007
Msg: 58
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/27/2008 9:29:36 AM
I understand that most every parent wants the best for their child, have it better than they did, but isn't handing the world to them counter productive ?

I find it interesting that parents are to quick to over look the fact that they worked and earned everything they have... Isn't that the lesson they should be teaching their children... not how to milk the system or work the legal system to get more free money ?

In the past, I have dated women that chose to be single and raise their child. What surprised me was that they supported the child, they took the "Child Support" and put it in a savings for the child for college or whatever the child decided to do with it as they felt it was their money... thus "Child Support". Now I realize this is extreme, but at the same time I believe that support should also go towards the child future and the mother is as responsible as the father.

Child support is based on "BOTH" parents income. Mine was based on me 45% mother with custody 55%. This means that for every $45 i gave, mother was supposed to account for $55.

Now this woman is collecting $600 a month and her part would be $660 a month. Now that is $1260 a month for those kids (not her). Keep in mind that the courts don't give a crap about the adults, whether we eat baloney and live under a bridge (so I was reminded by the fine courts of Florida when I first went thru this).

Child support is meant to put a roof over the kids heads, clothes on their backs and food on the table. It doesn't mean a $300,000 house with a in ground pool, a Lexus, a brand new car when they turn 16 and $200 pair of sneakers / $70 jeans, while the father is trying to support himself and his new family in a single wide trailer in a trailer park, driving a car that breaks down more than it runs... just because she feels she is entitled to everything. (not my case, but have seen it)

OP is only talking about $200... I can't believe that this young adult cannot find themselves a part time job (10 hrs a week.. 2 hrs a day) and contribute a little bit of money to help with her keep.
Oh god forbid if its going to inconvenience her a little or it might be a little tough to go to school and work part time. This is the real world and she isn't going to make it if she doesn't learn to make her own way...

This isn't about the money any more.... Its teaching that this young adult responsibility, to be able to fend for themselves.

How does the saying go.... Give a man a fish and watch him starve, teach him how to catch a fish and watch him prosper ? (You know what I mean anyhow)

I really don't believe its about the money (not $200), but rather to stick it too him for as long as she can for leaving her and the kids.
 dead account
Joined: 4/13/2007
Msg: 59
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/27/2008 9:35:45 AM
BTW, by this thread.. http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts10923689.aspx

It looks like the OP is going to college.
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 62
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/28/2008 7:49:58 AM

father's right's posse, have no insight into the obstacles that alot of young adults face with parents who are unwilling to support them in getting the access to an education....especially after they have skipped out on their finacial obligations in the past.


Those struggles have been around since post-secondary education began.... erm... a couple of thousand years ago, I suspect.

The difference now is that one parent can be made legally obligated through divorce/splitting up while if the couple had stayed together, there would be NO legal obligation.


Oh, I know...you are probably on the same page as some other near sighted posters, that it is important to teach kids the value of hard work right?..because any kid who has suffered a similiar circumstance as the OP, hasn't really earned anything?

I am amazed at your thought process...really!



Please point out where I said that, please.

But, now that you mention it, I do think hard work is something that parents ought to teach their offspring, yes. It's a better thing to teach in the long run when compared with teaching your kids to always expect someone else to always foot the bill.


You put money into your kids RESP account every year....yet you are arrogant enough to chastise a mother for asking or inquiring about her absentee ex being required to do the same?.....some mixed and messed up logic you have there capitano....pick a side already! !


If you can find anywhere I have chastised the OP, I'd be happy to retract the post.

My logic is not flawed as you suggest. I am being consistent in stating that I do not expect anyone, ever to pay for my kids' education or in any other way for that matter. This is not arrogance. This is self-reliance and personal responsibility.


I see that the mother provided for her kids...DESPITE the reduction in child support...I see that a child thrived and succeeded DESPITE the lack of involvement from the father.


And, I say good for her and good luck to the kids.


Hey...listen...I have a crow bar handy...I could help you down off that cross...anytime...just say the word!!


Darling, YOU are the one who is playing martyr or martyr advocate, not me....

.... if that is how I'm reading your mixed imagery.

It's alway confusing, but a never-ending source of humour having these strange conversations with you. Thanks for my Sunday morning guffaw, liz.



 dead account
Joined: 4/13/2007
Msg: 63
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/28/2008 4:44:43 PM
Capt, your not going to get your point across to the feminist. She only sees her point and no other. Men will always be second class citizen and should be financially responsible to the end of time according her royal highness.
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 64
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/28/2008 4:51:02 PM

Capt, your not going to get your point across to the feminist. She only sees her point and no other. Men will always be second class citizen and should be financially responsible to the end of time according her royal highness.


Oh, I know, but it's just so much fun.

The leaps of illogic, the ever present hyperbole, the plethora of mixed imagery and metaphor are always entertaining.

Kinda like banging on the pickets of the yard where the chihuahua lives.
 philrook
Joined: 1/20/2005
Msg: 66
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History
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/28/2008 8:01:05 PM
This issue is addressed in Canada ... a child continues to be a child of the marriage if he/she attends a post secondary institution full time for up to 4 years.
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 67
view profile
History
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/28/2008 8:18:01 PM

^^^ This issue is addressed in Canada ... a child continues to be a child of the marriage if he/she attends a post secondary institution full time for up to 4 years.

Just curious, is it renamed from "child support" to "adult support"? Also, I've read on threads about step parents being responsible for child support in Canada. Does the "child" get the support from the biological and step parent until age 22 (if they attend college)?




~ds~
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 68
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/28/2008 8:23:49 PM
^^^^ If there is a court order in place, yes.

This all started a few years ago when a case went through the Supreme Court of Canada I believe. I can't remember whether it was the mother or daughter who instigated the move against the NCP father, but it passed. Pretty sure that's how it got going, though I may be thinking of a different ruling.
 dead account
Joined: 4/13/2007
Msg: 69
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/28/2008 9:28:19 PM

PLEASE fathers on here - do not call this poster a feminist or a woman whose opinion mirrors that of other single mothers. It gives women like me a bad name..


You are correct and I apologize to those that work and support their children by themselves or with what they get for child support. There are a lot of honorable women out there, but with that said...

I was directing my comments to those that feel the need to punish the the EX by making him pay and pay some more because of their own bitterness. And for those that don't feel that it is their responsibility to contribute to the child's welfare and demand of the courts to collect more monies because they want the father to pay for everything. What I find interesting is how women are allowed to violates every terms and condition by denying the father of his legal right to see his child set by the terms and condition by the courts, yet the courts will yawn at this if the father complains, but by god let him be late 1 month on his support.

Here is a little known fact that doesn't get talked about much....

Percentage wise... There are more dead beat mothers that don't pay their child support than there is father, yet you don't hear about that.

FYI, the OP lives in the US (Nevada) and according to another topic she posted, she "IS" currently going to college, so she is not as bad off as many here would like to believe.
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 73
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/30/2008 7:22:31 AM

^^^when you are ready to debate the issues of what kind of sacrifice and commitment it takes to become a shared parent....I will happily reply to you in a respectful manner..


While shared parenting takes some work, it's not a big deal. I've been sharing my kids fifty-fifty for over six years. It works great. Two younger kids were 3&4 when the ex split.

I think you and other women are just afraid of losing some income if you have to share the kids. The trick for many women is be smart like my ex and have kids with a guy who makes pretty good money. I was the best financial decision she ever made.

Are their concerns? Sure there are, but the majority of cases would find the kids seeing a lot of time with both parents.


 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 74
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/30/2008 7:31:12 AM

gives me cause to put on my pom poms to encourage she see what legal avenues that are open to her to support her child's education....even if that means going after the father a decade later.


Yeah, yeah, we're used to you and your pom-poms shoutin', "You go, girlfrien'!" when a woman is trying to get an extra pound of flesh from her ex.

The OP's ex paid what he was legally required to pay. Let me help you since if I remember correctly, you have some difficulty with numbers. She has collected $100,800 from her ex since he left. He may be a shithead for not seeing his kids in that time, but, as you've pointed out before, there are 3 sides to every story.

 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 76
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/30/2008 5:31:20 PM

So if the cs was used to assist the mortgage....why not talk about the equity that cs paid for?


Silly wabbit, money doesn't work like that. The only money worth talking about is the money that does or does not flow towards the woman for "the benefit of the children".

Geez, I can't believe I had to 'splain that to you....



 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 77
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/30/2008 6:24:47 PM

You arrogantly claim that her ex made the choice to abandon her and the family that he created, like it was within his prerogative to do so.


Sorry, amore, for jumping in to a post directed at you. Normally, I stay away from posts directed at one poster.

platinum:

It IS the guy's perogative to walk away if he so chooses. It's also a woman's perogative to walk away if SHE choses to do so.

By the OP, her ex HAS fulfilled his LEGAL obligations. He has done what he was required to do. NO ONE can force another person to take an interest in another human being, whether that person shares DNA with you or not.


Yet you run down this OP and wrongly accuse her of looking for ways to get her deadbeat of an ex to pay for her (their) children's post-secondary education. You make it sound like she's a gold-digger who's looking to profit from her ex. She was merely seeking information on whether it would be possible to him to HELP with the cost of THEIR 3 childrens' post-secondary education.


The ex is NOT a deadbeat. According to the OP, he has fulfilled his legal obligation.

She IS looking for ways to profit from her ex. SHE doesn't want to pay so she wants her ex to pay. She WILL benefit from extended CS payments from the ex.

Again, the ex has paid over $100K already. Couldn't she have found a few bucks to put away for the education? Her kids will hardly be the only ones in the world who have to take out loans in order to get an education.

And, once again: If they had stayed together as a couple NEITHER ONE would be obligated to pay for a college education. Because they DID split the NCP can be held legally responsible depending on the jurisdiction, but not the CP.

Just pointin' out a couple of things....

Ok... back at it.

 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 78
How To Continue Child Support When The Child Is In College
Posted: 9/30/2008 6:54:54 PM

Capitaino - thanks, it does not happen often LOL


It sure doesn't from me. I am all about people standing on their own in a discussion. I don't like swarming, though I've been swarmed many times here in the fora, believe me. I've also been in the middle of a swarm IRL and it's ugly.

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