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 arcticdude
Joined: 10/4/2008
Msg: 126
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....Page 6 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
Wow, individuation, That last posting was all about money and nothing about chemistry or politeness (...well, except for 'politeness' as it refers to money)...wow...
Money money money...interesting approach! Good luck with that!
 windypace2600
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 127
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 1/4/2009 9:10:47 PM
Well, a guy bringing his kid on the first date would definitely have me raising my eyebrows...

Nobody... and I mean nobody gets to meet my kid for a LONG time... I'm talking at least 6 months... specifically because she is special, the love and light of my life... and only a really special person would ever get to meet her.

As for the being late... I would probably excuse that... I know as a single mom how hard it is to stay on a schedule... believe me... decent explaination would have sufficed there... however, I would expect some sort of explaination...

The phone thing... hmmmmm... I would have said something... perhaps like... "Excuse me but if you have other things you need to be doing... I can leave." :)

As for the money thing... I don't need a man with money... I take care of me and mine just fine... but... and this is a very BIG but... I won't take care of a man... I do expect a man I date to be able to take care of himself.
 One4Me?
Joined: 7/28/2005
Msg: 128
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 1/5/2009 10:22:35 AM
I would have to agree with David on this on, although this gent was obviously short on date etiquette you should have taken a moment to "nicely", lol explain what he had done wrong!! etc..maybe he could clue in to one of the reasons HE is single? and at least some of your exasparation would be eliminated....might I add that I thought it odd he brought along his child to his first date... I always think it best to keep all the chilibeans out of the dating game until something is established between 2 people.. just my opinion.
 KrisNAz
Joined: 10/14/2008
Msg: 129
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 1/5/2009 5:27:36 PM
I am laughing my butt off,, first date you meet at McDonalds? Then you two go to Taco Bell? Then he doesn't bring any m0ney, along with him being late all of the time? You have alot more patience than me,, I think McD's would of been a little bit of a turn off. This guy is not only cheap but not a good dater-good grief. But sadly, I think it's obvious he doesn't have alot of money due to being a single dad and thats ok as long as you understand that. But fast-food restaraunt is not a good idea for a first date, sheesh.
I don't think you're wrong to write him off though because he is inconsiderate and making no effort here.
 astredan
Joined: 7/31/2008
Msg: 130
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Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/12/2009 10:59:42 AM
Can you say "LOSER" if an idiot is that dump to bring his or her child on a first date that should tell you something bigtime, If the person is late 3 for 3 when you just met him, that should tell you he will be even later or a no show later in the relationship, if your dates consists of Mcdonalds and Toca Bell and just sitting in a parking lot tells you he has "no money" to do anything, "a shitty paying job" or is garnished for back child support. THE LEAST HE COULD OF DONE IS BRING A "2 CAN DINE FOR $8.99 COUPON. The guy is a loser, you should not need an opinion, he has a 2 year old child and he is already single and doing the child support thing I'm assuming. Maybe he did that to the Child's mom and she dumped his ass. SUCKS TO BE HIM lots of baggage free people out there. Those first 3 dates will tell you the most. I agree with Dave about one thing "YOU DUMPED HIS ASS ON THE DRIVEWAY AND YOU ARE UNDER NO OBLIGATION TO EXPLAIN WHAT THE PROBLEM WAS OR HOW TO DATE. HIS MOTHER AND FATHER SHOULD OF DONE THAT. LIKE YOU SAY YOUR TIME IS VALUABLE. Just my 2 cents, Best of luck. Dan
 moonlit09
Joined: 9/18/2008
Msg: 131
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/12/2009 11:06:47 AM
loose this why are you holding on the this person-
 goodoleboy72
Joined: 12/9/2007
Msg: 132
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Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/12/2009 11:20:50 AM
This guy did 3 things wrong

1 had his lil one with him ... thats just wrong on so many levels
2went to McD's ... the only date I take there is my lil one
3showed up late

there's a reason baseball has the 3 strikes and your out rule
 RidTransFat
Joined: 1/3/2009
Msg: 133
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/12/2009 11:32:10 AM

Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 10/3/2008 733 PM
I met this guy on POF in person last Friday. Friday night we decided to meet at McDonalds... he brought his two year old son. He was 10 minutes late (but... in his defense, he did call on his way and tell me). We sat and talked and I thought everything went well - though now looking back on it - all that happened was he attempted to entertain us by getting his 2 year old to say cute things.

After night #1... he called me... and asked if I wanted to get together night #2 (the very next night). I agreed.... This didn't work out between our schedules too well but we still managed to meet at Taco Bell around 9:00 that night. He was 10 minutes late. This time he didn't call. We sat in the parking and talked for about 30 minutes or so. I was tired - so we left.

He called on his way home and asked me if I wanted to get together night #3 (the next night... Sunday). So ... I met him at Central Park. We were to meet at 6:00. He pulled up at 6:20 or so. Late again! But this time he had a babysitter. By this time, I'm seeing a pattern.

Here's where I really need your opinion.......

I think it's enough that he was late 3 times (my time is important too). But... not only was he late all 3 times.... when he met me night #3, he showed up with NO MONEY (Strike 1 for the night). He asked what I wanted to do - I suggested a movie... he said he'd have to go to the ATM (as it if was really causing him grief to do so). So we went driving around. I had just gotten off work so I was hungry. I asked if he wanted to get something to eat... He said he had already eaten. (Strike 2 for the night) What did he plan to do?

So I got something to eat (paid for it myself) Strike 3. But decided to give him a "next at bat". The evening went pretty well but we basically did nothing but sit in the park and talk. Then he wanted to go by the river... I said I'd just follow him because it was closer to his house... and I would just drive on home afterwards. We get there and he's on the cell phone. 20 minutes later... HE IS STILL ON THE CELL PHONE!!!! So I started my car and started backing up. He was in disbelief that I was leaving.

Please tell me why he, for even one minute, thought that would be ok to talk on the cell phone for 20 minutes????

He called me that night - I didn't answer. He called 3 times the next day. I didn't answer. I'm done. Am I wrong?
WOW! You're a helluva lot more nicer than I am. If I decided to meet someone *clears throat* at McDonalds and he brought hs child with him without even telling me that would have been the last time I'd ever see him again.

Either I'm a total ****, or you need self-confidence, because I think you deserve to be treated better in all these instances. Then again, I can be a ****, but I still believe you deserve to be treated better.
 Diva77
Joined: 10/31/2008
Msg: 134
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/13/2009 3:04:10 AM
Seems like he's hiding something. Why always meeting at cheap fast food places? Possible he's got a wife or girlfriend at home? I'd say you gave him enough chances.

Next time... pick a coffee shop for coffee, like Starbucks or Second Cup. Just so much better than McD's.
 R.I.Guy
Joined: 12/21/2008
Msg: 135
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/14/2009 8:24:26 AM
You are 100% right. First off, I would never take a girl to a fast food place on a first date. It seems obvious to me, either he's broke, or he's a cheap **stard. Either way, you should have left. If this guy did shit like this on a first date, imagine how he would be after he got to know you and was comfortable. You must be the most tolerable woman in America. This guy clearly doesn't have an ounce of class. If you want to talk sent me a message.
 barbee1970
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 136
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/14/2009 10:27:22 AM
I would have left, too. Sure he's not trying to hide something, like a wife or a girlfriend?
 rayse
Joined: 1/17/2009
Msg: 137
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/14/2009 11:00:17 AM
after reading some posts and the OP...


I would have left, too. Sure he's not trying to hide something, like a wife or a girlfriend?
my suspicions were along these lines too. things that make you go 'hmmm'.

but besides all that, i really feel badly for his kid. sad.
 nevadajay
Joined: 2/7/2009
Msg: 138
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Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/14/2009 11:14:54 AM
Only mistake you made was that you stayed around for that long. Move on!! He's not for you.
 baraboom
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 139
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/14/2009 11:16:45 AM
THE FISH STINKS, THROW IT BACK IN THE SEWER!!!
 footballmom77
Joined: 1/5/2009
Msg: 140
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Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/14/2009 2:17:26 PM
No, you are not wrong. You know what you want and this guy doesn't seem compatible. No harm in that, that's why it's called dating. One of my girls just told me "you have to go through a few frogs before you get to the prince,,,,," - I like that analogy.
 prof48
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 141
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/14/2009 6:43:07 PM

You're right - at the very least I guess I could send him a quick message... but I don't owe him anything. I probably should have done that. But, now it's been 5 days since his last phone call (I'm so thankful) and I'd really hate to stir things up again.

No need to. If he can't figure it out he has an IQ well below what would be acceptable. Even if he had an emergency that required his using his cell phone he could while on the cell phone inform you that he would not be available and let you go. Now some people don't have a good sense of time. He sounds like one of them. But if time is important to you, as it is to me, you should not have to tolerate the hurry up and wait syndrome.
 honey_babes
Joined: 7/4/2008
Msg: 142
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 2/15/2009 1:40:16 AM
YOU are absolutely RIGHT for not picking up his calls. Never settle for less, what a loser!
 canadianguy976
Joined: 8/18/2008
Msg: 143
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 3/12/2009 4:59:49 PM

Written in original post:
I asked if he wanted to get something to eat... He said he had already eaten. (Strike 2 for the night) What did he plan to do? So I got something to eat (paid for it myself) Strike 3.


The guy has a kid and he's chronically late, usually kids dawdle. There is a way to be on time with kids but its not always easy. 20 minutes and no phonecall is too much. 10 minutes is nothing; I've dated women who were 25 minutes late with no phone call because they were having a bad hair day. To each their own, if you want him to be prompt tell him so, otherwise, move on to the next guy.

Although your Strike 3 I think is totally out of whack. You complained that Strike 1 he didnt show up with any cash on him, he had to go to the ATM to get some, I think that's out of whack. He wasnt hungry and you had to go get something for yourself and pay for your own food (gasp), I think that's a bogus Strike, your Strike 2 was that he didn't want to go to a movie and didn't want to go grab up a bunch of cash so he would be flush to hang out with you?

Sorry for the wake up call, but the man is a single dad, working and looking after his kid. He had to pay the babysitter that night that he got one, and he had already eaten but you were hungry.

You may be a nice person or may not be, but from the read of your criteria for a man it sounds like you want a man who will take you out and spend all of his money, and be there on time for the privelege chop chop, for god sakes. The guy seems from your description to be a bit disorganized and maybe doesn't have the best choice in locations for you, maybe it's not meant to be but you seem to be all about someone else's money.

Perhaps you will have better luck with dates if you go to the ATM YOURSELF before the date and maybe offer to pay for something for the guy for a change, the dates you have will go more to your liking. "You ate already? Well I'm hungry, why don't we go to a little restaurant and I'll share an appetizer with you while I eat dinner, my treat; I'm the one who's hungry. No dont worry about the ATM, lets just go tt Joes Diner down the street from here."

If I had a girl sneer at me because she was hungry and wanted a quick bite but I wouldn't foot the bill, I'd say it was getting late and that I had to go, and try to cut back on the babysitter expense because I'd just wasted my money on that babysitter. I dont have kids but I've lived with girlfriends with kids, and it's hard enough to get a babysitter let alone afford it sometimes when you have all these expenses.

Yikes. They should have a category on POF, under "Looking for" called "Someone to buy stuff for me" and you should be the trial run for it.
 Valentinne
Joined: 1/27/2009
Msg: 144
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Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 3/13/2009 1:41:20 PM
Honey, you did the right thing. Do not even let it let you lose one wink of sleep. Never pick the phone up for him again.
 wastingtyme
Joined: 3/1/2009
Msg: 145
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 3/13/2009 5:49:43 PM
The original post is very old, but if the OP is still around I just need to ask: What made you pick him in the first place. I know it is not answering the question but you got penty of answers already.
 SassyMa09
Joined: 2/15/2009
Msg: 146
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 3/13/2009 9:14:23 PM
No no no, you should have left right after you ate your dinner ....
 Thissweetyis4u
Joined: 1/4/2009
Msg: 147
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 3/14/2009 4:56:07 PM
I'm with her. I could maybe understand meeting in McD's. With his son though? Why not suggest a daycare center so the focus could totally be somewhere other than on you his date? lol and 2nd at Taco Bell. Well since he's broke, glad he picked places with Dollar menus.
Be glad you dropped him. He was rude anyway you shake it
 Mermaid-213
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 148
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 3/14/2009 6:24:45 PM
You can do so much better. Trust me on this one. With age, comes wisdom.
There is lot of great guys out there ( where oh where art thou Romeo !!!).
Three strikes and you are so OUT !!! Good motto to live by.
MM
 bebe_doll
Joined: 3/20/2008
Msg: 149
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 3/14/2009 11:12:11 PM
I think your first mistake was not letting him know that you were annoyed at the fact that he was late 3 times. Perhaps he thought your silence meant it was ok to be late. As for the cell phone call... that's just downright RUDE!! I'd be like "TALK TO YOU NEVER LOSER!" :)
 irelaxu
Joined: 10/29/2008
Msg: 150
Met this guy on POF - Tell me if I'm right....
Posted: 3/15/2009 7:37:22 AM
Money issues aside....the guy has a lack of respect for you and for himself. Hence, always being late and taking quality time from you to talk on his cell phone (unless he's a doctor and was giving tips on how to save someone's life...but I digress...)

And you know what, just by the mere fact that you posted this and wanted us to reply: You already know you aren't into him. Why even bother with the commentary? Move on.
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