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 AUTHOR
 Amon Amarth
Joined: 11/11/2008
Msg: 172
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemakingPage 4 of 12    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
Toys are typically reserved for single women so they don't have to sleep around, but even then seem unessessary as its basically like you're paying for sex because you bought a toy. Personally it seems pretty desperate actually for anyone to use sex toys. Why waste your money when you can just play with yourself for free! And if you are in a relationship there should be no need for toys if you have the real thing so why use something that is 2nd rate at best? Why would any woman need to use or prefer a toy over the real thing anyways? If you do then you have some issues you should see a sex therapist about. That would be like a guy saying he would rather have sex with a blowup doll than real woman? A man and woman should be enough for one another and they should be getting off on one another's bodies like hands, fingers, tongues, feet, mouths, genitals etc and the need for a toy is not needed. If a couple needs to bring a toy in their relationship to enjoy sex then its obviously they have more problems in their relationship that need worrying about than what toy to use. Bringing a toy into a relationship would be an insult to any man or woman. The sex toy industry preys on desperate people like them and tells them they should use a toy because thats their business and they want your money otherwise they would go out of business. Instead of worrying about what impersonal toys to use maybe you should concentrate more on enjoying your partner's body. I'm amazed how something so simple eludes people.
 Amon Amarth
Joined: 11/11/2008
Msg: 177
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/18/2008 1:19:14 PM

In that case your saying 98 percent of the human race need sex therapy????? Who would have ever thought?????????

all the sex books, therapist, and video on teaching love and sex all include toys. so i doubt very seriously a sex therapist would do anything but agree with the ones who use toys.


I seriously doubt 98% of women use toys. If they did its usually that ugly or fat ones that can't get a man that do. I suppose if their man doesn't know how to use his tool or has a small one then I guess she would have to use a toy. Any man that can use his equipment or has a good size one, then his gf/wife prefers his penis.

All those sex books and sex videos companies are out to make money also off desperate people or people without a good sex life, so they prey on people with these problems in order to get their money. If two people concentrated on enjoying one another rather than trying to insult or replace their partner by bringing in something other than their partner to get off, then relationships would be much healthier and happier. I mean really why would any man or woman need to use a toy with their partner if they enjoy having sex together. You seem to think its ok to use something other than your bf to get off, but do you think it would be acceptable if he wanted a blowup doll over you? Yeah I didn't think so! People that think they need to try these unessessary and impersonal toys to get off when in actuality nothing is better than the real thing are very sad misguided people. If you already have the real thing why bother with something second rate?
 Amon Amarth
Joined: 11/11/2008
Msg: 179
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/18/2008 1:29:41 PM

why is it that some men get angry if the woman wants to add toys during a night of lovemaking? I always thought men were all for it. Is it becuase they want to be what causes the woman or orgasm? How can I possibly change this situation to make him feel better about using them?


You basically answered your own questions. I think you would find that most men wouldn't want their wives or gf's to use a toy, so your assumptions were wrong, most men aren't for them as its basically admitting he can't do the job! Of course a man wants to be the one to make her orgasm, do you even have to ask that? I think it is very insulting for you to want to use a toy in the bedroom if you have a bf. I think it is you that needs to change your outlook on it and enjoy your bf and what he offers rather than worry about a toy. If you just want to use toys why didn't you just stay single and masterbate 24/7 if you want? Does your bf have a small one or is his plumbing broke? If not, I think he should seriously find another gf who doesn't try to insult his manhood. I'm just saying!
 Amon Amarth
Joined: 11/11/2008
Msg: 180
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/18/2008 1:38:19 PM

Some men love it and others get jealous because the size of the toy is bigger then they are.


Or maybe women use a toy because no man is interested in having sex with you....errr I mean them, unless he was high or drunk which is the more likely the reason.
 Amon Amarth
Joined: 11/11/2008
Msg: 186
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/18/2008 2:08:59 PM
Yeah you look like a real winner there rjncharlotte. Maybe you can't make a woman orgasm from sex but don't speak for the real men on here that know how to use their equipment. Cogie 36 looks just about right for you, you are both divorced...gee I wonder why?
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 190
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 12/18/2008 5:30:34 PM

Why would any guy disaprove of the use of toys during intimacy?

My answer would be, if my lady and i were just having fun/sex bring on the toys,,
But if we were making love on a more intimate level,, additional hardware wouldn't be needed or welcome,, I can speak for her as well,, even though I haven't found her yet,,

Then you might ask,, how would I know that,, because I know the woman i desire,,
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 195
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/2/2009 1:34:23 PM
^^^^ I did ,,, blow up dolls swallow too,, with out complaining.....
 campfire4u
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 197
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/2/2009 2:53:11 PM
Try asking him to at least try it once and Tell him if he doesnt like it U can stop and will never ask again....
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 198
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/2/2009 2:53:35 PM
Men cannot compete with these machines meaning men cannot keep up with the stamina that a machine provide. Go figure! So yes, there's some insecurity there.

But men aren't fools either, I'm not going to race my sail boat in a speed boat race,, therefore I will find the appropriate woman who likes thing just a little slower,,
 MrMillionaire
Joined: 7/1/2008
Msg: 201
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/2/2009 4:42:44 PM
I think that if a guy is really into a woman, he wants her to get all that she needs whether he provides it or "BOB" does. For me..it is not a matter of masculinity. It is a matter of love. Do you love her enough to insure that you will be the only person that she will want to share her toys with? Can you watch her masturbate so that you know how to stroke her so that she cums in wave after wave of ectasy?

Are you willing to let the little "stuff" go for the bigger picture: A Lady who knows that her man wants the best for her? And allowing her to bring her "friend(s) along ought not be seen as an insult but rather the aid that it is in making sure that the Lady is truly happy.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 204
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History
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/2/2009 5:50:36 PM
this brings to mind the thread about men not being able to get off with oral sex or a woman giving them a handjob.....
Many of the men in that thread told the ladies to not take it personal....

Same thing here......no reason for a man to take it personal.
If it's what a woman needs to reach completion....I would think a real man would be right there using BOB on her....and not even wait for her to have to do it herself.
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 205
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/2/2009 6:04:34 PM

Maybe that is the case, maybe it's not... But in the meantime is the woman expected to go without an orgasm for however long it takes, which could be a prolonged length of time. When the orgasm can be easily got with the additional stimulation..
I can understand that he would like to be the one who sends her to the moon and back. What i can't understand is...A man would rather his woman go without the only orgasm she can get (by use of a toy or masturbation) so that his ego is intact???

I don't think that is what a man is suggesting,,what he is suggesting is.,,If a woman wants to experience a different organism through penetration with a man,, or through oral, IF she would want to help in the process, and the man will do his best to achieve that, mean while still using the toy, but not as often, and by all rights that would be the woman's choice to decide how long she would want to wait in between the Big O..
It's all about partnership,, isn't it,,

Again I'm all for toys,, just adding a little insight
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 207
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History
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/2/2009 6:14:51 PM
You beat me to it Jim!!
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 211
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/17/2009 9:06:49 AM
Some people are set in their ways.

You have described OP to the tee,,
She will not do oral, BJ, even though she have never tried,,
She will not try anal,
She can't have an orgasm with out a toy,
She with held much of this information from him before she got married,
She never had an orgasm with her husband.
She is now trying to convince him to use toys because she likes them and needs them for an orgasm,,

My thing is I got to try at least once.

I agree,, but OP only want what she wants and will not try any thing new or accept anything that she does not believe in,, whereas she wants others to chance to meet her needs,, ( selfish)

The prudes of the world ruin more peoples fun

isn't that the truth, especially if they don't try..
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 214
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History
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/17/2009 11:46:51 AM
Good thing at least one person in your marriage is willing to compromise.........


We are all entitled to our preferences are we not?

Well......you are.......but your husband wasn't.
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 216
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/17/2009 12:20:06 PM

by the way rdcnorm, anal and bj's are not my preference. We are all entitled to our preferences are we not?

yes that is so true,, yet you worked real hard to chance your husband's,, Hmmm
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 219
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/17/2009 1:42:54 PM
I didnt change him. he did that all on his own.

yes he did do it on his own to please you,, where you wouldn't even consider such a thought..
Your the same woman who would see he child dead, than accept her sexuality,,Hmmmm

As for the rest of your post about me,, hog wash,, prove it,, and when you do,, please give me the post number,,

Kitten,, there is so much crap that flows from you I don't know how you keep up,, I'm not the only person who see you as a bigot, and selfish person..
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 226
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men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/19/2009 8:21:44 AM

Kittenhere: Keep in mind that I had already accepted no.

You have repeatedly said you "accepted no".....
The following are your quotes.....

Original Post: why is it that some men get angry if the woman wants to add toys during a night of lovemaking? I always thought men were all for it. Is it becuase they want to be what causes the woman or orgasm? How can I possibly change this situation to make him feel better about using them?

~I am simply asking what I can do to help him understand and or give other things a try.

~However, tonight when he gets home im gonna give him a beer, sit him on bed, tell him to relax and that I want to discuss sex.

~I will discuss this situation with him tonight. In fact im gonna call him and ask him to take off work couple hrs early.

~However after our talk today i think he is gonna work with me on this

~But with a bit of work on my part I think I can help with situation..jsut might take some time

Now.....it's not that I don't think you shouldn't be discussing your sexual needs.....
The issue for me.......is you constantly talking out of both side of your mouth.....no matter what the topic.
If you were actually willing to accept his "No" after the first talk......wth was this thread for ?
I think you should count yourself a very lucky woman to have a husband willing to compromise for your needs......I haven't seen one post of yours saying you are willing to do the same for any man.
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 229
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/19/2009 10:41:54 AM

try telling him It's not about his miss givings It's about what you like.

Yep that the point,, it's all about kitten,, what she likes,,,
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 232
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History
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/19/2009 11:24:45 AM

Did I hit any nails on the head there?


Not for me u didn't.

I'm not of the mind to "forget about the man".....
I might have my hands full....but I still have a mouth!
or he might be doing the same things as me..and giving himself pleasure...
or he could be inside me...and me just stimulating my clit....

and honey.....I've never given myself an afternoon orgasm.....and not wanted my man that evening. If anything.....I'll be even more ready for the "real deal".
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 234
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men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/19/2009 11:56:11 AM
Good Lord Duckman....
you inexperience is showing.....

We don't just grab our toy......do ourselves.....and forget we have a real live man in the room with us!!

It's called "mutual" satisfaction.....
and toys are an "enhancement" to that.
 opnmydm
Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 244
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/21/2009 4:40:34 AM
i dont get it, why would someone object to toys?
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 245
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/21/2009 5:25:41 AM
A woman that says, she can't cum off of just sex, prolly never had a****that was big enough to make her cum during sex..
think about it.

I don't think it's the size that really matters,
A womans G-spot 1 1/2" -2" in her sweet spot,,

Note:
The clitoris probably holds the key to female ejaculation for most women. If the clitoris is not stimulated a woman is less likely to become highly aroused. If she is not highly aroused her prostate may not fill with increased amounts of fluid. If her prostate is not swollen she may not have a G-Spot. If her clitoris is not stimulated she is less likely to experience orgasm and the rhythmic contractions of the pelvic muscles that expel and release the ejaculate. So quite simply before you can go exploring for the G-Spot you must master clitoral stimulation beforehand. There are women who are orgasmic and ejaculate when their G-Spot or vagina alone is stimulated but the majority need direct clitoral stimulation if they are to experience orgasm.

Toys are great,, but,,, put your hands tongue and lips to works, if you really want to please your lady,,
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 252
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/21/2009 7:47:33 AM

never use toys larger than ur Mans penis

Why??

I have, they are fun to use on her,, if she likes it I'm all for it,, knowing when to use them is the key,,
 funksoulbrutha
Joined: 1/3/2009
Msg: 254
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History
men disapproving of toys as addition in lovemaking
Posted: 1/21/2009 8:19:10 AM
If by "toy" a woman means her neighbor Hugo, I might object.
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