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Joined: 7/12/2008
Msg: 19
being told you're a nice guy but.....Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
mariov~you have to get a reality check
they will not leave me alone and get argumentative that i won't meet them for coffee...
i mean, get real!
Joined: 8/9/2008
Msg: 20
being told you're a nice guy but.....
Posted: 12/7/2008 6:03:07 AM
Hypocritical at best...
If you're spending time with someone then why would they not think that you are attracted to them? Seems like most girls just want a bad boyfriend and a nice guy to cuddle up with after the douche kicks her out of his place..silly.
Joined: 1/19/2008
Msg: 21
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being told you're a nice guy but.....
Posted: 12/7/2008 10:40:26 AM
Regarding message 19 ...... OW!
For all the "nice guys" and "nice girls" out there........
During the course of dating, you are certain to meet your date's same sex friends, relatives, aquaintances, whatever.
When your desire for more is answered with "you're a nice guy/girl, BUT" hang your head, show the disappointment, but do not whine. Say how you had hoped that this could have been more. Then ask , "Do you think your friend/cousin/co-worker (insert name here) might be interested in me?"
At the very least, this knocks the person back to reality, off his/her perch.
At the most, if he/she truly wants to be friends, a friend would hook you up!

Okay, I have never done this myself, but I WILL next time!
Joined: 7/12/2008
Msg: 22
being told you're a nice guy but.....
Posted: 12/7/2008 11:18:35 AM
chemistry is not looks, it is something goofy that attracts you. if another person doesn't feel that that that is fine. It is two personalities liking eachother where it creates an attraction. it is a chemical reaction. if the other person doesn't feel that~what is the big deal~ at least that person is not gaming with you. She was being honest. it is better then stringing someone along.
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 24
being told you're a nice guy but.....
Posted: 12/7/2008 4:54:23 PM
I understand the point and reasons for you feeling the way you do. However, let's take a look at human nature. Let's take the shy gal who enjoys sitting at home and just "being together" with her guy. Chances are that you'll never get the opportunity to get to know her unless it's through a chance meeting where you are thrust together. Ok, now let's look at your "middle of the road" woman. What is going to catch her eye, and eventually her heart? Feeling good when she is with you. What makes people feel good? Humor, excitement (this can be oh so many different things, depending on the person), feeling loved (but too early can be creepy) etc. Now let's look at the "nice guy". He's kind and considerate of what she wants. He's there to try and do the little things for her. He's dependable, loyal, loving... He's what she wants once she falls in love with him. The hard part is getting to that place in the relationship.

Be yourself. Embrace the things you like to do and invite her (or the next gal) to go with you and do those things. Be active, that will give you an opportunity to do the things you like doing (activity wise), let you show her that she can actually have a good time with you, and give you the plenty of chances to start doing little things for each other. The last is important because if you find that you are the one who must be constantly be providing her sense of excitement, get rid of her. She's not willing to be a partner in the relationship. She just wants someone to provide her excitement. Like pinciperro said, be confident in yourself that you are worth having and if something isn't right, don't try and force it. Communication is a must but also take things as they come.
Joined: 12/23/2008
Msg: 25
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being told you're a nice guy but.....
Posted: 7/12/2009 11:05:26 AM
Mini-Me: Nothing wrong with being a "nice guy", but also be a FORTHRIGHT guy. It's great that you talked about mutual interests, but you've got to get down to the nitty gritty of your feelings toward a girl as soon as they surface. Don't only express those feelings in words, but touch her, and touch her often, caress her, be physical. If she pulls away or recoils, you've got your answer right away instead of getting crushed later on down the line after expending a considerable amount of time, energy and money. If she warms up to those sensations, maybe you've got a keeper there, maybe she'll stray, but at least you'll have the satisfaction that you manned up and enjoyed the gift that God placed in your midst.
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