|50+ PartnersPage 2 of 9 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)|
This is such a double standard is my first thought. Men brag to each other about how many women they can sleep with. I've seen journals from real actual men who write a name and score sex from a 1-10 and write the positive and negative etc. It is unclassy but yet they give the guy a high five.
I'm not sure why women (or men) keep rehashing this worn out (mostly invalid) point. As one other poster said, I have NEVER had any other man brag to me about how many women he has slept with. Let's move past the 70's and also see if we can distinguish between television and reality...real reality, that is. Are there those out there that do this. I'm sure there are. But I would say it's an unbelievably small number. Most mature men past the age of...say...22, do NOT care how many women other men have slept with...do NOT keep a journal or "little black book"...AND...here's the kicker for people who believe this *&$%...Most mature men, when hearing someone talk like that, think just as little of that man as most women do! No, he is NOT king of the castle. He IS unclassy. And anyone who did value themselves would NOT be with him.
Posted: 12/26/2008 10:40:30 AM
I think that must be the difference between men and women..........we don't rate our lovers.........
Baloney! The way a man knows, I mean really knows, whether he was a good lover to his woman, is by how many of her friends hit on him after he splits with her. Because they ALL know exactly what he's like in bed... Down to the most embarrassing detail. It's part of the reason why so many men are a little tight lipped about fantasies, and don't do anything we don't want the whole world to know about. So many women have no sense of responsibility to keep our sex lives out of their friend's ears... And subsequently, off the streets.
Posted: 12/26/2008 10:47:47 AM
|^ roger, I disagree...at least in my own experience. I've never discussed my sex life with any of my friends. They on the other hand will share whatever over coffee like it's normal conversation in public. |
What has happened to me as a single person is that my married friends really want to know about my sex life now. I don't talk about things that personal except with the person I am doing it with. It's nobody else's business.
Posted: 12/26/2008 10:52:42 AM
|^^^To all the women that really don't do this, kudos to you. You are in the very desireable minority. Problem is, how's a guy supposed to know he has one of you and not one of the more common types?|
Posted: 12/26/2008 11:15:46 AM
how's a guy supposed to know he has one of you and not one of the more common types?
Here's what I do...I tell any guy I have sex with, if he blabs about it, he can guarantee there won't be an encore performance.
I've had friends of my ex asking him for my phone number since we split up. I know, classy bunch of guys. I actually asked him if he told them anything about me. He says he would never do that to me. He said as soon as he told them we weren't together anymore, all his single and a few married guys asked how they could contact me. I'm still not sure if I believe him considering I wasn't fond of many of them.
Posted: 12/26/2008 11:31:05 AM
|Okay seriously, ladyangel64, just because you don't agree that someone might love sex and able to do it without feelings and feel that have to marry everyone they have sex with, lets not get carried away with endangering lives and what not. You want to talk about negative behavior...hello pot meet the big black kettle!|
Posted: 12/26/2008 2:07:53 PM
That's also part of the reason a lot of guy don't want our Ex dating anyone we know...
I'd hate to think that what went on in the bedroom becoming public knowledge...
I've known women to comment on things like the guy's stamina, how often they did it..., kinkyness, penis size.... if he had trouble gettig it up etc...
That is another mark of insecurity. When I was in graduate school, I lived with a girl who, after we broke up, I suggested she introduce herself to my thesis advisor (who had also been a good friend of mine for years before I went to graduate school.) They ended up getting married. The have two kids and have been happily married for 15 years. I personally think it's great that it worked out so well for both of them. My thesis advisor was probably the smartest person I've ever met and I was always in awe of him, but never did it occur to me to feel intimidated by what she could have said about me in the sack. What difference would it make? At that time, I WAS insecure about the number of partners a woman had before me and she'd had probably 40+ partners. But, even then it would have seemed weird to be so insecure as to be worried about what a former girlfriend might say to a friend of mine she decided to date. Who the fvck cares? I can't imagine caring that much about what other people think. Getting over the partner count was the last hurdle of insecurity I conquered and I can say that every aspect of my relationships with women have been better because of it.
Posted: 12/28/2008 3:28:24 PM
|The past is the past, leave it there. However now I'm wondering if he waited 3 years to ask this question is she really that good? or is he that bad?|
Posted: 12/28/2008 9:30:00 PM
If you can't handle the answer to the question guys, then don't ask.
How is "accepting it" the only way to "handle it?"
Not all women have the need or desire to sleep with lots of men. Same goes for men. Women, who throw the "They do it. Why is it not OK for me?" crap out there, are just grasping for something to justify their desire to behave a certain way. If THEY jumped off a cliff to their death, you wouldn't want to do THAT. If a woman disqualifies a philanderer for treating women as sexual exercise equipment, nobody condemns her decision. Why is it not OK for a man to do the same? If a man holds a woman to a higher standard than himself, then it's wrong.
Posted: 12/29/2008 6:53:41 PM
|If he didn't care BEFORE they had sex, why should he care AFTER? Although 50+ is an age when the elder's health naturally starts to deteriorate. Seems like 20-50 is a magic age where good times can roll between those ages. Above 50 and things start to get thorny, because the younger WILL realize "what am I doing with this older person?"|
Posted: 1/6/2009 3:43:24 PM
|Ya 50+ at age 26 is a real significant thing...it is a sign of something really messed up with her. That's not emotionally healthy. I think it represents a lack of self esteem and no self respect. Where's Freud when you need him?|
Posted: 1/29/2009 6:59:43 PM
|Chris Rock said it best: "Don't even ask, just be happy your hitting it now. She could say a low number like 2 and you'd be like: Two, two? Two! Oh boy, I guess that's just the way you was raised???" (Meaning two is alot!) Just don't worry about it. Pray that however many he/she had gave him/her the experience to "rock your world" and enjoy each other while it lasts. They had people before you, and will have people after you, and so will you. Just forget about it and be happy you found somebody that can make you happy, even if it's just for the moment.|
Posted: 1/31/2009 6:15:14 AM
|nothing wrong with her,it just shows she has an imagination,as for std's, it only takes one time with the wrong partner, and a woman that has no experience and a high sex drive, one that has not allowed it to thrive will sooner or later explore it, why the double standard, if it was a man we where talking about, he would be considered a stud,and probably a good lover|
she is only 26, so she had some fun. there is a difference between love and sex, combine the two +an imagination and your sure to be a happy man
Posted: 1/31/2009 6:22:12 AM
|Reminds of a conversation from the movie Clerks:|
Dante Hicks: You said you only had sex with three different guys; you never mentioned him!
Veronica Loughran: Because I never HAD sex with him.
Dante Hicks: You sucked his****
Veronica Loughran: We went out a few times. We never had sex but we fooled around.
Dante Hicks: Oh my God, WHY did you tell me you only had sex with three different guys?
Veronica Loughran: Because I DID only have sex with three different guys; that doesn't mean I didn't just go with people.
Dante Hicks: Oh my God, I feel so nauseous!
Veronica Loughran: I'm sorry, Dante, I thought you understood!
Dante Hicks: I did understand! I understood that you had sex with three different guys and that's all you said!
Veronica Loughran: Please calm down.
Dante Hicks: How many?
Veronica Loughran: Dante...
Dante Hicks: How many**** have you sucked?
Veronica Loughran: Let it go!
Dante Hicks: How many?
Veronica Loughran: All right, shut up a second and I'll tell you! Jesus! I didn't freak out like this when you told me how many girls you fxxked!
Dante Hicks: This is different, this is important. How many?
[long pause as customer buys something]
Dante Hicks: Well?
Veronica Loughran: Something like... 36.
Dante Hicks: What? Something like 36?
Veronica Loughran: Lower your voice.
Dante Hicks: Wait, what is that anyway, something like 36? Does that INCLUDE me?
Veronica Loughran: Ummm... 37.
Dante Hicks: I'm 37?
To some people, a number (and what legally constitues as sex) matters.
Posted: 1/31/2009 6:27:12 AM
|i should add that i have only had long term relationships ,i have chosen quality over quantity,but realize the importance of great sex as on of the most important ingredient to a happy life, if two people do not have the same sex drive, the relationship is doomed|
Posted: 1/31/2009 6:59:16 AM
After 50+ partners, do you really think you're going to be even remotely close to being her best lover....? Chances are, she's done everything, with other people.... You only have a 2% chance of being able to rock her world... What will the two of you have together that's uniquely yours...?
It isn't that simple. If she's been with this guy for three years, chances are that she's had a lot more sexual experiences with him than she has with anyone else. My experience is that sex tends to improve with a partner as we get to know each other, so someone I've been with longer is much more likely to be a better lover for me than someone I've only slept with a couple times.
Aside form which, do you really worry about being the best lover, having the biggest c*ck, etc? I'd be seriously concerned if a partner was overcome by such a huge sense of insecurity. Sure, I'd like to be my partner's best lover, but if we're having awesome sex and we're happy together, what's the issue?
Posted: 1/31/2009 8:09:53 AM
|Finally somebody expresses a rational, adult way of thinking about this issue. My experience would have to concur with this viewpoint. Thank you for sharing such insight.|
Posted: 1/31/2009 10:05:49 AM
|There are an awful lot of men who've matured beyond that sort of pointless competition, and many women who are very competitive. It's not a gendered thing.|
The real point is: What is more important to you, that sense of competition, or your actual relationship with an actual person?
Posted: 1/31/2009 6:17:25 PM
|Your either a Virgin or your not! Get over it!!|
Posted: 1/31/2009 9:08:40 PM
|LMAO!!! Iffn' you are with someone whom was with 50+ partners, count yurself lucky, ya don't have to train em! It is those who have been with few that are the dead F$%ks. Experience is always best, don't complain cause you was not the first, enjoy it, there is a reason why they do what they do and it feels good, Practice makes perfect!|
Posted: 1/31/2009 10:20:33 PM
Sorry, men are generally competitive...
Men will a compete over just about anything ...
A truly competitive person doesn't like to win by default. A competitor wants to beat other real competitors and welcomes competition. I'm not sure what you call someone who is actually afraid of competition, but it isn't a competitor.
Posted: 2/1/2009 4:48:10 AM
|My god, lying is GOOD???? What is wrong with you people?|
After 3 years together, what the hell difference does it make? It shouldn't matter one bit, and if it was SOOOOO important to him, he should have asked in the beginning of the relationship.
Lying about past partners is a lie. I applaud the woman for being honest. If he is distant, perhaps she should make it a bit more permanent and dump him.
Posted: 2/1/2009 5:21:10 AM
This is definatly a time to be less than honest. A guy really doesn't want to hear this.
WRONG! I'd much rather have a wiman with a hisrory of 1000 partners than a woman who had 1 or 2 and lird about it or wouldn't tell me. Being honest matters. Having a lot of partners doesn't.