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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Age of ex-wife a turnoff when dating?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Jersey125
Joined: 1/23/2011
Msg: 17
Age of ex-wife a turnoff when dating?Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Who cares.

What is the point of getting twisted about the person they were married to before you.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 18
Age of ex-wife a turnoff when dating?
Posted: 5/20/2011 12:31:47 PM
That's so gross.

I'm having a little difficulty reconciling that statement with your comment in the scientology thread in which you said that you'd date Tom Cruise. Tom Cruise is almost 50. How could you be ok with dating a guy who is almost 2 1/2 tims your age, yet think it's gross for a guy that age to date a woman your age?
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 19
Age of ex-wife a turnoff when dating?
Posted: 5/20/2011 4:05:25 PM

OP...you're still in denial stating that you were both in "love"!


Why would you say this???? Where you part of the deal when the OP was married with this young thing???? Or are you "assuming" it was because of the money,,,,because????????? Oh,,,that's right, all young women marry older for the $$$$$$$. Every SINGLE ONE of them.

Honestly people, the OP asked about how to handle the age of his ex wife. Some here asked why it should come up???? Really?????

Reread some of your comments. The ignorance and arrogance is quite visible.

Now OP, you KNOW, why you should NEVER EVER bring up this subject again in front of ANY females for the rest your life. Now, go sit in the corner until you grow up
 Smarts and Heart
Joined: 12/15/2009
Msg: 20
Age of ex-wife a turnoff when dating?
Posted: 5/21/2011 10:04:46 AM

Why would you say this???? Where you part of the deal when the OP was married with this young thing???? Or are you "assuming" it was because of the money,,,,because????????? Oh,,,that's right, all young women marry older for the $$$$$$$. Every SINGLE ONE of them.

Honestly people, the OP asked about how to handle the age of his ex wife. Some here asked why it should come up???? Really?????

Reread some of your comments. The ignorance and arrogance is quite visible.


Walt... it's evident that you read selectively!

It was the OP who stated that his wife of 3.5 years decimated him financially! In the last year he saw the marriage unravel, due to financial reasons. Doing the math that says that the marriage survived 2.5 years of plenty and when the credit limits were maxed it started going down hill. He had to move away from her because of that!
I don't state anywhere that EVERY younger woman will take an older man for a ride....although you hear of many....but this one certainly did!

In my books a woman who "loves" her husband regardless of age wouldn't look to decimate him financially. She obviously got as much as she could as fast as she could and moved on when the tap was dry. He may have been in love, but I certainly doubt she was, otherwise they'd still be working and building together.

If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck....it usually is a duck.
That's something he has to learn from.
His life choices and decisions create a history and pattern of behaviour on his part, so yes his ex wife's age could be a turn-off.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 21
Age of ex-wife a turnoff when dating?
Posted: 5/21/2011 10:34:44 AM

In my books a woman who "loves" her husband regardless of age wouldn't look to decimate him financially. She obviously got as much as she could as fast as she could and moved on when the tap was dry.


Well, all I know is that GREED knows no boundries,especially with age. I know many women that have taken their "husbands (after more years of marriage than the OP's situation) to the cleaners. MANY of them were A LOT older than the OP's ex. Ya know, like our ages. Don't tell me what people "in love" will do to each other, we see it all around us, and some of it isn't pretty.

We all learn from our past, and one of the things I have learnt is that we are not on this earth forever. I hear all the time here in these forums about how it would be nice to be able to find someone that we can spend time with having "fun", enjoying each other's company,etc. I also hear from some about these youngsters being "used" by the older ones.(male and female) Hell, couldn't we ALL say that we are ALL being "used" in some way, shape or form when in a relationship??????
Just as I won't label EVERY female that I meet when comparing to my "past" experinces, I will not label every young-old partnership with such generic ca ca. Take notice on the negativity here and who it's being posted by. The OP GOT HIS ANSWER to his question, especially if he ever wants to enter a relationship again with someone his own age. I'm sure he is thanking ALLLLLLLL you girls for your replies.

He will now keep his yap shut about parts of his past, and then be labelled a liar later.

Correct?????
 NotElvisJunior
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 22
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History
Age of ex-wife a turnoff when dating?
Posted: 5/23/2011 4:50:44 PM
Correct, indeed!

Damned if he does, damned if he doesn't.
 NotElvisJunior
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 23
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History
Age of ex-wife a turnoff when dating?
Posted: 5/23/2011 4:56:29 PM
Janet_Always wrote:


Sometimes I have asked a simple "how long have you been divorced" or "how long were you married" kind of question and walked away from the date knowing way more about the ex-wife than I did the guy I was trying to get to know.


That's not talking about an ex-wife, that's going overboard.

Though, in one particular noteworthy case, a woman asked me about my ex, and my past marriage, and I had no problem answering. Didn't feel I had anything to hide - and, like me, the woman herself was divorced and had a child.

Then she asked follow up questions. Again, pretty innocuous, and again, I had no problems answering, and then she'd ask about certain aspects, etc.

Then, subsequent to that conversation, she didn't think it would work - keep in mind, we hadn't met yet.

The reason? Because the amount of time I spent talking about my ex-wife, to her, CLEARLY indicated that I was obsessed with my ex and not over her!

I am not kidding, this actually happened!

Obviously at some point I was supposed to stop answering her questions, or ask her "Why do you want to know so much about my previous relationship?" or something....


So, maybe it's the bias of my past experience, but I wonder, then, what constitutes a simple direct question. While that one case was a pretty bizarre example, in my own experience, I have *never* met a woman who simply asked about how long I was married, or how long since I'd been divorced, and it being that and nothing more following.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Age of ex-wife a turnoff when dating?