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 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 6
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how long without sex is normal?Page 2 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
If you are married or in a stable LTR, then 6 months to 3 years is about normal. If your single, 3 days to a week....
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 14
how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 1/15/2009 8:33:38 AM

anyway, i guess my question is if i do meet a woman and things progress, would she think i am odd for waiting so long?


As you might be able to tell from the responses, different women view this in different ways.

I would think that you are odd, and like another poster, I would wonder WHY you waited so long. Have you not dated at all in six years? Is your libido low? Do you indulge in self-pleasure?

But some women have expressed the opinion it isn't odd.

I also wonder, are you using this as an excuse to NOT pursue a relationship because you have other issues?
 GeneralizingNow
Joined: 10/10/2007
Msg: 17
how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 1/15/2009 8:56:25 AM
I once dated a guy who hadn't had sex for 9 years [he was 46 at the time]--and even then, it was an aborted attempt (an I had sex "sorta" thing--with a lesbian). He seemed to really enjoy my body, but since he had been with "himself" for so long, he had trouble realizing there are smells --other than lotion-- involved, and had a difficult time realizing it wasn't all about him and that I actually had "demands" of my own.

Personally, I would have a slight problem, thinking that you have intimacy issues -- since he did, too. But by the time I got to know you hadn't had sex in so long, it would prolly be too late, right? I'd have already made up my mind whether I wanted to or not.
 zabet
Joined: 10/27/2007
Msg: 18
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 1/15/2009 8:58:30 AM
It ought to be considered normal to spend a few years alone after the end of a longterm relationship. Too many people rush out and find someone new, and then repeat the same mistakes they made the last time. OP, hold out for someone who appreciates that you've spent the last several years alone.
 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 19
how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 1/15/2009 9:07:08 AM
^^^Great advice zabet!

frankly i would be a whole hell of a lot more concerned about your roommate than i would you and your six-year hiatus. i wouldn't even touch your roommate without a ten foot pole and surgical gloves.

Make that a body condom!
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 24
how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 1/15/2009 4:24:06 PM
...I can't tell you how long without is normal. Everyone's sexual appetite is quite different. I prefer to dine with someone who is just as selective as I am...And to be perfectly frank, I have had very few sexual partners throught my life and it is not because I have a low libido....I can be a very passionate lover...with the right person.
In other words, I choose not to have sex just to satisfy an urge.... for me I need to feel something for my partner, an emotional attachment before I partake in the pleasures of the body. I am not going to tell you how long I've been without...just know that it's been a very long time.

...maeflowers
 maxxoccupancy
Joined: 2/5/2007
Msg: 35
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 1/15/2009 10:22:04 PM
24 hours is normal. After that, I start to develop the look that only men have.
 SAguy_06
Joined: 12/29/2005
Msg: 42
how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 1/17/2009 8:47:34 AM
I would NOT use Normal when talking about Sex. There are so many human varibles that no reseacher would even attempt to answer that question.

The better question for you to ask is...SHOULD I TELL MY POTENTIAL SEXUAL PARTNERS OF MY SEXUAL PAST. (What was your intimate relationships like prior to your divorce)

But its a moot point if you dont have a "partner" to confess to...
Till then, as the saying goes..."Lets worry about that bride when we get there".
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 45
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 1/18/2009 3:17:18 AM

i guess my question is if i do meet a woman and things progress, would she think i am odd for waiting so long?


Don't tell her and she'll never know.
She may think you're odd for making a big deal out of it.
 m14shooter
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 59
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 11/9/2009 3:41:58 PM
I went 8 years, it was hard on my right arm but we made it through it. It was just like riding a bike and I got right back on it.
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 61
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 11/9/2009 6:25:50 PM

anyway, i guess my question is if i do meet a woman and things progress, would she think i am odd for waiting so long?
I wouldn't be concerned if I was with a man who had not been with a woman for an extended amount of time. I'd prefer to be with a man who doesn't sleep around a lot.

Do they exist?
 m14shooter
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 62
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 11/9/2009 6:28:13 PM

Do they exist?


Yep we do exist.
 Tarah0128
Joined: 2/25/2009
Msg: 66
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 11/10/2009 1:43:04 PM
Not tonight, I have a headache

 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 68
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 11/10/2009 2:10:47 PM


I've been down so long, I'm starting to grow gills...I could use sometime up in the shallows. Kidding. Mostly.
Not tonight, I have a headache
Now that's just sad.

Someone send stargazer a snorkel.
 texasbaby
Joined: 7/21/2005
Msg: 72
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 12/3/2009 4:15:59 AM
^^^^^^ No doubt!
I think what's "normal" for some, would scare the heck out of others!
Whatever works for you, is normal, don't ya think?

tb
 SingleGuy4912
Joined: 7/25/2006
Msg: 74
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 12/3/2009 11:56:04 AM
Yeah, what's normal? For that matter, does self-gratification count?
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 84
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 12/17/2009 7:34:21 AM
I'm thinking everyone is different when it comes to "normal".

Example:
My grandson is in the 1st grade but reads at 3rd grade level ... that's "normal" for him (and actually really great considering he's borderline Autistic)

A lot of women won't "have sex" with a man unless there is some sort of emotional tie ... perhaps even commitment ... disease testing ... so that's "normal" for them

To me, "normal" is what stays within my comfort zone and since we're all different, my logic tells me that ... everyone is different when it comes to "normal".

I would rather be involved with a gentleman who views "sexual intimacy" the same as I do ... and that means he's not out there having sex with just any woman he can find ... just to "have sex".

So, yes ... it might take years to find that person ... and that would be "normal" for me.
 itechman63
Joined: 7/7/2005
Msg: 86
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 12/17/2009 10:15:45 AM

To get a lady, you've got to expose yourself as well.


I might be wrong, but I don't think that's the best way and potentially could lead to an appearance in court.
 Jake52177
Joined: 12/18/2007
Msg: 87
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 12/17/2009 12:46:33 PM
I heard Richard Pryor say there's only 2 pieces of "stuff" you remember, your first and your last, and if i gotta think i don't wanna live that long.
 mysteriosa
Joined: 5/19/2006
Msg: 92
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 2/12/2010 8:02:40 PM
I don't think it would put me off but I might wonder why you'd been so restrained given than many men aren't. I don't go after any free male either so I can understand that.
 MrLove45
Joined: 1/31/2010
Msg: 93
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how long without sex is normal?
Posted: 2/12/2010 8:51:46 PM
You'll be just fine. Just stop comparing your self to your roomate and get back on that horse. You've waited this long why not let it happen natuarally with some lady that you really care about.
You've waithed this long so why not see if you can connect with a woman mentally,spiritually,emotionally and then physically.
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