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 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 82
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What are your favourite sayings?Page 2 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
Why buy a cow when you can get a free milk?

That might be true ,but all cows are not happy and are not all from California..






I am over here ,You damned fisherman !!


 daveg61961
Joined: 9/28/2007
Msg: 87
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 11/23/2009 8:06:06 AM
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-****."
 raxarsr
Joined: 7/10/2008
Msg: 88
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 11/23/2009 4:55:57 PM
there are damned few problems that cant be solved by the judicious application of high explosives
 daveg61961
Joined: 9/28/2007
Msg: 89
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 11/24/2009 6:26:17 AM
"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body; but rather to skid in sideways, beer in hand, body thoroughly used up and totally worn out, and screaming "Yeeee haaaa, what a ride!"
 parrotmama
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 95
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 11/25/2009 8:33:12 PM
The version of the "pig" saying I like is:
Don't try to teach a pig to sing, it just frustrates you and annoys the pig

I also like:
Foolproof systems do not take into account the ingenuity of fools
Words are cheap, behavior is believable, consistent behavior is trustable...
The definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over expecting a different result.
 searching4luv
Joined: 1/2/2005
Msg: 102
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 12/4/2009 8:52:45 AM
" I see said the blind man, so he picked up his hammer and saw!"
 westym
Joined: 4/5/2009
Msg: 112
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 12/22/2009 3:21:28 PM
My favorites must be from jack handey
www.deepthoughtsbyjackhandey.com
His deep thoughts are the best.
 caseydean
Joined: 3/24/2009
Msg: 131
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 1/13/2010 12:42:13 PM
When a friend asks what he/she owes you for a favor..

'We'll just charge it to the Dry & Bill it to the Dust!


Weather related...
Yeah! It's a drier, than a 99 year old whore!

Why just this mornin, there was a pair of rainbow trout a building
a nest in the trees.
 parrotmama
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 132
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 1/14/2010 8:32:30 AM
Another one from Steel Magnolias, "The nicest thing you can say about HER is that all her tatoos are spelled correctly..."
 parrotmama
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 133
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 1/14/2010 8:34:02 AM
Her idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance...

When I am Empress of the Universe...heads will roll!
 cutieisacurse
Joined: 4/15/2006
Msg: 134
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 1/14/2010 1:17:13 PM
In response to someone who is whining about something not being fair:
Rocks are hard, water is wet, the sky is blue and life is unfair.

Similar to the brits use of get on with it:
Keep it moving

Also in response to whining about things being hard:
Suck it up buttercup it is what it is

And

MANUP or for the ladies GIRLUP
 me2u_xx
Joined: 1/21/2011
Msg: 137
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 6/26/2011 2:55:18 PM
A friend is some1 who tinks ur a good egg even tho ur cracked -------r slightly scrambled!!


U can't pee like a puppy if u run wit the big dogs!

Always do wot ur afraid 2 do!

Stand up 4 wot u believe in, even if u stand alone!

U remind me of a penny .... two faced & worthless!

"Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy." - Eskimo ProverbSee More
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 141
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 6/26/2011 8:51:50 PM
If ya think I am bad, you aint see nothin yet.
 sexyazzkay
Joined: 10/24/2008
Msg: 142
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 6/26/2011 9:33:28 PM
My profile headline..........

Cleaverly disguised as a responsible adult.

You!, out of the gene pool, NOW!
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 145
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 6/27/2011 4:07:09 AM
"Genuine Certificate of Authenticity Included with Every Order."
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 149
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 6/29/2011 11:13:34 PM
To whiny people
-Wish in one hand shite in the other see which one fills up first.
-Put on your big girl panties and deal with it.

My dad's personal fave:
-Put a bag on her head and f*ck her for glory.

And the one that guided me into the world(literally, my dad was wearing it at my birth):
-Reach out and f*ck someone.

Another good one:
-It's kinda like masturbation, it may seem like a good idea at the time, but you'll find out you're just screwing yourself.

I heard this actual conversation between a guy and girl:
Girl: You will never find another girl like me in your whole life!
Guy: That's the whole point.

Sleep Talkin Man:
I'm not the one who told you to put earwax on your penis and call it snake warts.---don't know what it means but I love it.
 kmxplore51
Joined: 7/6/2008
Msg: 150
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 7/2/2011 4:00:03 PM
It's better to be gone but not forgotten than to be not gone but forgotten!
 destructodave
Joined: 4/18/2009
Msg: 153
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 7/7/2011 6:46:04 PM
Live life like a dog; if you cant eat it or screw it, piss on it and walk away.
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 155
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 7/12/2011 11:26:24 PM
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Better to die laughing of lorlam post than die miserable because of no dates..
 Dittohead_213
Joined: 10/11/2010
Msg: 161
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 8/15/2011 4:54:23 PM
*I'm not a wierdo...you're just a p***y!!
*Same fishy smell, differnet ****.
*Excuses are like mouths. We all have them and a lot of them suck.
*Religion is like having a penis. It' s nice to have one and it's fine to be proud of it just don't shove it in my face.
*If size dosen't matter, why do you never see 3" dildos in the porno store?
*Here 's something you never hear everyday, "Stop sucking my d**k or I'm calling the poliece." Probably the funniest thing george carlin ever said.
 636racer
Joined: 6/3/2011
Msg: 163
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 8/16/2011 9:55:01 AM
I haven't read through all of these yet so my appologies if there's a repost:

"Don't take life so seriously, you'll never get out alive" -Van Wilder

Let me break it down for ya Crayola style, that means I'm gonna draw you a pretty picture. -me

"Recruiters are the apex of integrity in the United States Army" -Drill Sergeant when a new recruit said his recruiter lied

While waiting to take a urinalysis my Battalion Commander walked up and asked, "How is everyone doing today?" and I replied with, "winning like Charlie Sheen sir, that's why I'm takin' a drug test!"

"The world's two most abundant rescources are hydrogen and stupidity" -unknown origin

And for the whiners

"BREAKING NEWS!! The Pity Train has just derailed at the intersection of Suck It Up & Move On, and crashed into We All Have Problems, before coming to a complete stop at Get the Hell Over It. Any complaints, can be forwarded to 1-800-waa-wah with Dr. Sniffle Reporting LIVE from Quitchur ****in. Suck it up Buttercup, life doesn't revolve around you...!!!" -Friend's facebook post

"I wish all vaginas had a clear history button" -Friend's twitter page

"I always tell women, you better get yours before I get mine, it's a race." -My Platoon Sergeant

"I'll f*** start your face!" -A squad leader at a former unit

"I may be ugly but at least I aint got no money!" -ICP, Playa Haters Degree

"Running is like beating myself in the foot with a hammer, it feels so good when I stop" -One of my former soldiers

My First Sergeant: "Why are you late?"
Me: "I don't know, I could possibly be pregnant"

That's a horrible idea...let's do it! -Me
 636racer
Joined: 6/3/2011
Msg: 165
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 8/17/2011 1:43:12 PM
"Free love, inquire here"

Written on HMMWV on the turret sheild right by the gun...
"PHOTO BOOTH: Look here, wait for flash"

"Don't test the water with both feet"

"If you don't chew Big Red, f*** you!"

"If a tree falls in the woods on a mime, does anyone care?"

"The Irish MP's are NOT after me Lucky Charms"

Reguarding tests or physical competitions:
"If you aint cheatin' you aint tryin'"

"Stop looking at me in that tone of voice!"
 jojoaus
Joined: 10/28/2007
Msg: 167
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What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 8/18/2011 12:35:14 AM
Tombstone humour... According to Billy Connolly, his headstone will read, in very tiny letters so you have to get close to read it, You're standin' on ma BALLS!!! Spike Milligan claimed to want 'I TOLD you I wasn't feeling well!!' on his headstone.

Groucho again... Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

My grandma (English) used to say 'The whole world's mad except me an' thee and I'm not so sure about thee'

Another old UK one, Yorkshire ore thereabouts, 'There's nowt so queer as folk!'
 jamjg
Joined: 7/27/2011
Msg: 168
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 8/18/2011 8:03:55 AM
Great one...lmao

"Pick yourself up, dust yourself off!"
 grizz789
Joined: 1/20/2011
Msg: 170
What are your favourite sayings?
Posted: 8/18/2011 5:47:25 PM
It's all shit and giggles to someone giggles and shits
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